I woke up reluctantly as usual. I opened my green eyes, trying to get the sun out of them. I didn't like the day; it meant I couldn't dream. I couldn't dream of what I wanted to be, what I desired, loved, needed. I couldn't dream of a world where I wasn't the school's biggest geek. Where my sister did not hate me, and she accepted me for whom I was. Where my parents were constantly home, to take care of me when I was hurting and hated my life. Where the girl that I loved, loved me back. I sighed contently, thinking of my love. Bella Swan. She was God's gift of perfection. She had brown locks that reached her waist, brown endless eyes that seemed to look right into your soul, milky white skin, and the most beautiful smile that could bring light to a world of darkness. She was popular, though she seemed oblivious to the fact. Everyone loved her. How could they not?
I shook my head, trying to get Bella out of my head (which let me tell you, it's impossible) and got up from bed. I searched in my nightstand for my thick-rimmed glasses. Once I had them on, the world became so much brighter. My room was so simple… just a bed; dark blue and black walls with shelves for my books and classical music. I showered quickly, not wanting to be late for school. I threw on some jeans with suspenders, a white shirt and black shoes. I looked at myself in the mirror with disappointment. My tousled bronze hair was sticking out on all sides, attempting to tame it I ran a hand through my hair, only to make it worse. My black thick rimmed glasses covered my green eyes. Who was I kidding? There was no chance Bella Swan would fall in love with me. I turned around, and grabbed my school bag one my way out of the room.
One my way to the kitchen I saw Alice coming out. She was a really good person… to anyone who wasn't a geek like me; especially me. She ignored me, like every day, and it made me sad. I loved Alice a lot, but she didn't care for me, her brother. She had even ordered me not to talk to her at school, and that the only time I could talk to her was when dad and mom were at home. She glanced my way because she was heading to where I was coming from; the stairs. In the moment she looked at me with rage I looked at her with sad eyes. I lowered my gaze and kept walking to the kitchen. I glanced back, and I saw Alice standing there, with her shoulders hunched, before she straightened and kept walking.
I ate quickly but in silence. Always in silence. I finished my breakfast and hurried to the door. I got in my silver Volvo (which I had begged my dad to buy it. People thought I was undeserving of such a nice car, but it didn't matter) and sped off to school. I reached it with minutes to spare and buried my nose in a good book. Everybody stared, whispered and gossiped about me. But the thing was: I didn't care. I was never exactly happy, but not sad either. My mother once told me to let people talk, that one day I would be successful and have my own business and that one of them would come to me and beg me for a job and apologize for their past behavior. That in the end I would be the better person and give them the much needed job.
The bell rang, and I made my way to first period. It was the period I loved best; I had Bella Swan as my desk partner. Once there, I sat on my usual chair beside the window, where it let me see the beautiful yet cloudy day. Suddenly the chair beside me was pulled back, and there she was, beautiful Bella.
"Hi," she smiled. I smiled back. Them Mr. Kolinsky came in the room, telling everybody to shut up for once and listen.
"Ok class, this is the deal. I have a lot of work to do, and since you seniors love chatting so much, I will take advantage of that. While I check some tests and homework, you are allowed to talk with your partner. Do not make me regret my decision," he said sternly and headed to his desk. One silent second ticked by, and then the class erupted in conversations.
"Be silent!" Mr. Kolinsky hissed. The class became a little bit more quiet, but not much.
"So Edward, let's talk," said Bella. She knew my name! I smiled shyly.
"Want to play 20 questions?" I asked her; with only God knows from-where-I-got-from confidence. She smiled back.
"Ok, you start," she encouraged. I decided something trivial.
"What is your favorite color?" I asked her. She blushed lightly and I wondered why.
"Green," she said. "You?" she asked me.
"Blue," I said. I had seen her wearing blue, and it was the best combination with her white skin. "Hobbies?" I asked her.
"Read classics" she replied automatically, and then blushed. I smiled. "You?" she asked me.
"Play piano," I replied also automatically. She looked surprised.
"You play piano?" she asked me. I smiled and nodded. We kept asking the same easy questions, and if it was even possible, I fell more in love with her.
When lunch came around, I went to sit by myself as usual below a tree outside the cafeteria. I was taking out a sandwich from my paper bag when suddenly somebody plopped down beside me. I noticed it was Bella, smiling widely at me.
"Mind if I eat lunch with you?" she asked me. I shook my head; I couldn't even speak or think coherently.
"So why do you eat here by yourself?" she asked me. I smiled sadly.
"Do you know somebody who would sit here with me, the biggest geek in school?" I asked sadly yet jokingly. She looked sad too, but confused.
"Apart from me, you mean…" she began and I smiled and nodded. "Don't you have a sister? Alice Cullen?" she asked me. I looked at my hands which were clutching my sandwich for dear life.
"Yeah, but she kind of doesn't…" I trailed off, not wanting to finish my thoughts. But Bella understood, and she looked outraged.
"But she is your sister!" she cried and I shrugged.
"It's okay," I said sadly. She looked like she wanted to argue but dropped it.
"So tell me, Mr. Cullen, how do you do?" she asked me smiling.
"I am very well, thank you Ms. Swan," I replied. She laughed, and I couldn't help but smile back. Go I loved that girl.
So like that, weeks passed. They were the best of my life. Bella would hang out with me constantly. She even introduced me to some of her friends. Angela Webber was the nicest out of them along with her boyfriend Ben Cheney. Mike Newton was a funny guy and Jessica Stanley was really plastic but nice enough. I found myself laughing so much in those weeks sometimes I would find myself gasping for air. And every time I saw Alice I would smile at her, and she would still ignore me. It hurt a lot, but I could live with it.
One week, though, as I was heading to my room coming from dinner, I saw Alice. she was sitting in the couch, thinking hard on something. I was about to walk past her, when she called me.
"Wait!" she spoke to me. I stopped dead in my tracks and faced her. I smiled, and she just looked at me.
"Now listen to me, Edward, and mark my words. You do not belong with Bella Swan. She is not your friend; nobody is. So just leave her alone before you turn her in a geek like you and she becomes miserable… just like you," she hissed at me. I flinched at her words.
"Why, Alice?" I whispered. She looked at me confused.
"Why what?" she snapped. I sighed.
"Why do you hate me so much? What did I do to you?" I asked sadly. She narrowed her eyes at me.
"You were born," she said, glared at me one last time, and left. I sank to the couch, rethinking our conversation. Alice really did hate me. I was sad, but my mind was elsewhere. Should I really leave Bella alone? Was it wise? I fell asleep on the couch, thinking my options.
I woke up, feeling dizzy. Had last night been a dream? I looked at the couch and got my answer: no. that morning passed by in a blur. Soon I was again on my bed, staring at the ceiling. I already knew what to do: I couldn't leave Bella. I loved her too much. And I knew it was selfish, but I would stay by her side until she ordered me away.
But again, my plans came to an end. The next morning, I was waiting for Bella by our tree, when she came to me, crying. She was holding a letter. I got really scared.
"What's wrong, Bella?" I asked her.
"What's wrong? How can you even ask that?! You send me this letter, telling me that you were only using me to seem popular, call me names, break my heart and you ask me what is wrong?!" she yelled at me. I was confused and mad she would think so low of me.
"Can I see the letter, Bella?" I asked her, calm, despite the war going on inside of me. She huffed, threw me the letter, and took off, running in the cafeteria. The bell rang before I could read the letter, and I sighed and stood up, ready for the next period. I felt as though somebody had ripped out half my heart, soul, mind… me. Bella was that… my other half. The other half I loved, wanted and needed.
I arrived at the next period and read the letter. I almost ripped the letter in half. It was from Alice, saying she was me. I knew because it was in her letter, her words, and the only kind of paper she used: pink. School ended, and I sprinted to my car. I threw the door open so hard it was a wonder it didn't fall, and headed home. I got home in a matter of a few seconds, and paced around the living room. How could Alice do this to me? I knew she didn't even care for me; but how could she have dropped so low? Low enough to kill half of me.
I heard the doors lock being opened, and I turned to look at the door. In came Alice, looking victorious. She looked at me, and her smile faded. It turned to a glare. I raised the letter in my hand, and glared at her.
"How could you?" I asked her. She didn't even look a bit guilty.
"How could I what?" she asked innocently.
"How could you do this to me?" I was in the verge of screaming, and I never ever screamed.
"The same way I ignore you and pretend you don't exist," she smiled. Then I snapped.
"HOW COULD YOU BE SO SELFISH?! HOW CAN YOU DO ALL THIS AND NOT FEEL EVEN A SHRED OF GUILT?! HOW CAN YOU DESTROY MY HEART, INGORE ME, HATE ME, AND MOCK ME AND THINK IT IS OKAY?!" I yelled at her. She looked taken aback.
"You had never screamed at me before…" she whispered.
"Why, Alice? Why would you hurt me like this?! How could you do this to your own brother? Does it mean anything to you?!" I asked with disbelief. She just stared at me. I tried controlling myself, but it was difficult.
"And you know what the worse thing is?" I asked her. "That while you hated me with a strong passion; I loved you, cared for you, and would have forgiven you in the blink of an eye," I said and shook my head. "Did you know I love Bella? Did you know I feel alive when I'm with her, that I feel loved? I bet you didn't, but I also bet that even if you did, you wouldn't have cared. You never do," I said. I could feel an angry tear slipping out of my eye and I brushed it away furiously. "I hope you feel pleased with yourself," I said, and walked away.
I went upstairs to my favorite room: the empty dark room, with only a black piano; the one my whole family was oblivious about, even my parents. This was supposed to be my room for TV but I had sold it, and along with my saved money, I bought my beautiful piano. I played when I was mad, sad, lonely or bored. But I had stopped playing. And now, I was back. I sat on the bench in one swift movement and readied my hands on top of the piano. I thought of Bella, smiling at me, telling me she loved me too; and began playing. I started experimenting, slowly, until it started to come out. I wrote the piece of music on a sheet of paper. I stared at the music written in there, and played I again. Only this time it was finished. Only this time with more love, need, bliss… Bella. Only this time I could play it all without making mistakes trying to create music. And I loved it. I loved it because Bella inspired it and because it reminded me every sweet melody of her tender, sweet and caring voice. I finished, and with a sigh, still sat on the bench, I turned. Only to find Alice, still as a rock, in the doorway.
"Where did you get the piano from?" she asked me quietly, with worried eyes. Maybe she was worried I would be mean to her and yell again. But I wasn't like that.
"I bought it," I replied shortly.
"It was beautiful what you played." She said smiling sweetly for the first time.
"I composed it," I said and she gasped.
"You… composed that?" she asked me and I nodded. "What's it called?" she asked me. She had her arms crossed and was leaning against the doorframe.
"Bella's Lullaby," I said and smiled. She looked down, I'm guessing ashamed of herself.
"I'm sorry," she apologized after several seconds.
"It's okay," I said. Her gaze shot up, and she looked at me disbelieving me.
"You don't hate me?" she asked and I shook my head. "Why?" she asked, eyes wide. I looked her straight in the eye.
"Because you are my family. And even if you hate me, you are still my sister. Plus, I can't go back in time," I whispered. She looked torn, and in a split second, she was hugging me, crying desperately.
"Oh Edward, I'm so sorry! I've been a terrible sister to you, and you were nothing but sweet to me; always. I never hated you; just resented you. You have always been mom's favorite son, good at everything. I was jealous, and I hurt you so much. And I am so sorry; I didn't know you loved Bella so much. I wouldn't have-" she stopped speaking, her voice hoarse from crying. She hugged me tighter to herself, like if she didn't I would run away.
"It's okay, Alice. I-I love you, sis," I said honestly. She looked up with bloodshot eyes and smiled.
"I love you too, bro," she said and hugged me, this time happily. After that we spent some hours talking, filling in the hole that ad been there for years. A hole made of hostility, jealousy and anger; and we were filling it with love, smiles, laughs and jokes.
"But Alice, I don't' know how I will get Bella back," I told her. She looked guilty again, but then she smiled.
"I know!" she squealed happily. I looked at her with a raised eyebrow. She giggled. "Tomorrow is the Spring dance, right? So tomorrow, you get there, without glasses or any of that sort, and you speak to her. Then you confess your never ending love for her!" she sighed dreamily.
"Yeah, Alice, that sounds good. One problem though: how will we get her to go?" I asked her. She looked thoughtful before she smiled widely.
"I know! I will tell one of her friends to make her go," she said. I laughed at her, but we kept talking nonetheless. I had missed our daily talks; well, I had generally missed talking to her. I looked at the clock and saw it was late.
"Well, Al, time to sleep. Goodnight," I told her and smiled. She gave me a hug, and when she pulled away she smiled the most radiant smile I had ever seen her wear.
"Love you," she said, still smiling. I smiled back.
"Love you too," I said, and went to bed, with half a smile plastered on my face. Now only I needed Bella to make my smile widen.
The next morning, there was a tux laid out on my chair, and contacts beside them. And beside them were a pair of blue jeans, black shirt and black converse. I looked at them skeptically, and saw there was a note.
Morning Edward! How did you sleep? I slept as better than in the past 18 years of my life: D Anyway, the tux and contacts are for the Spring Dance. The other clothes are for today. And if you don't wear them today it's not going to be a pretty sight. Love you!
Alice.
I groaned. I should have known Alice would try dressing me up. But I was happy she had slept well. I had as well. So not wanting to be late for school, I showered and dressed up. I looked at myself in the mirror, and decided I looked good. But then again, I was missing my glasses. I put them on and looking back at the mirror, I pictured myself without them. I'd look so much better. I was about to put the contacts on, when I had an idea. I would make a bigger impression today if I arrived without them to the dance. I smiled.
That day I rode to school with Alice in my Volvo. She seemed hyper, and I realized that was because she was like that. She had just stopped being her usually perky self in the last years. And I was glad she was back.
"I like seeing you like this," I told her, voicing my thoughts. She looked at me confused.
"Like what?" she asked me. I shrugged.
"Carefree and happy and full of energy," I told her and she smiled.
"The side effect you have on me," she said and I laughed.
When we got to school people talked and stared, but Alice just kept smiling her way to the front doors.
"Edward, do you want to sit with me today at lunch?" she asked me hopefully. She hanged out with other popular people, among them Jasper Whitlock (her boyfriend), Emmett McCarthy and Rosalie Hale (Emmett's girlfriend). They were nice enough people, I remembered.
"Sure," I smiled. First period came along, and I stared at Bella sadly throughout the period. I didn't hear what the teacher said for the first time ever. When the class ended I sighed sadly, and made my way to second period. Lunch came by fast enough. I sat next to Alice, and everybody turned to look at me. We had all been friends long ago, but when middle school begun, we parted. Emmett, however, was the first to break the silence.
"Eddie! I missed you so much, dude! It killed us to look at you eating alone!" he boomed and laughed. Rosalie and Jasper nodded in agreement, and I smiled.
"I missed you all too," I said. Alice, however, was gaping at them intently.
"You missed him?! Why did you never say anything?!" she screeched. They all looked guilty.
"We didn't want to get in a fight with you. Ya know, Team We Want Edward Back and Team We Do Not Want Edward Back. Yesterday you were still the only member of Team We Do Not Want Edward Back. But today… we welcome you, Alice, to team We Want Edward Back," said Emmett with a huge grin. Alice was looking at them murderously.
"Oh and Em?" I said to Emmett, causing a distraction. "Don't call me Eddie," I said he laughed again.
"It looks like you still don't like the nickname," he sighed dramatically. "Oh well…" he said, and began eating his food. I laughed at him, as did everyone else.
"Edward?" called me Alice lowly. I glanced at her and nodded, a sign that I was listening.
"I talked to Angela Webber. She said that she would force Bella to the dance if she had to," she smiled evilly and I grinned.
After lunch the day went by slowly, until it was time to go home. I dashed out of last period and I got in my car, waiting for Alice so we could go back home. She came a few seconds later, and she grinned like a maniac.
"Angela said she got Bella to agree," she said, and with that I sped off to the house, full speed. When we got there I was very surprised to find mom in the kitchen, cooking chocolate chip cookies. I welcomed the nice smell through my nostrils, and smiled, drunken with the smell.
"Dears!" exclaimed Esme, my mother, with a huge grin. I smiled, and she hugged me and Alice hard.
"I've got news!" she said, jumping up and down in excitement, proving to be Alice's mother. "I quit my job. Now I can be a full-time mom!" she said happily. My dark world kept lightning up. Only Bella was missing, to make my world full of light. After that we kept talking a little while longer, until Alice saw we were running late.
I ran upstairs and showered quickly. After that I put on the black tux, along with my eye contacts and black shoes. I saw myself in the mirror and grinned. I liked my new look, I only hoped Bella like it too. When I came out, I was blinded. I couldn't see at all, only light.
"What?!" I hissed, covering my eyes. I blinked a couple of times and regained my sight. I saw Alice with a camera; I'm guessing that's what blinded me. After some tears from mom and promises of arriving safely, Alice and I made our way to the dance. It was being hosted at the school's gym. Fork High's gym looked amazing. It was filled with light, balloons and happy people. But many people did stop and stare-this time in awe. Women had lust-filled eyes and guys looked murderous. I heard a girl purr to her friend "Who is that?" and I had shivered from disgust. I was heading to the refreshments table when a hand rested on my shoulder. I turned and it was Alice.
"Edward, there's Bella. Go find her and talk… I'm sorry for everything…" she whispered in my ear while hugging me. I looked in the direction she was looking and I think my eyes bugged out. There was Bella, in a black cocktail dress that reached mid thigh, and in the waist it had a blue ribbon. The top of the dress was white and after the blue ribbon it was black. She was wearing blue high heels and her hair was down and she had makeup on (A/N pic on profile). Stunning. That was what she was. I was going to keep on staring at her, but my feet had other ideas. I started walking towards her, unable to stop myself. I reached her and grabbed lightly her elbow. She turned, startled, and gasped when she saw me.
"E-Edward?" she asked, stuttering. I nodded.
"Bella, could I please talk to you outside?" I pleaded her. She was still in a state of shock and nodded absently. I lead her outside, to the tree where we ate. I stopped there, and turned to look at her.
"You have 5 minutes to explain yourself," she grumbled and I nodded.
"Well, you know how Alice and I had a bad relationship, right?" I asked her and she nodded. "Well, she wanted me to stay away from you. but when I wouldn't do I, she took the matter in her own hands; so she sent you the letter," I said, and she looked shocked, yet doubtful.
"She sent the letter?" she asked me, eyes wide. "Then what?" she whispered.
"Yesterday we got into a huge fight. I screamed at her for the first time in 18 years; so you'll understand her shock. After some time and talking, I forgave her." I said. Bella looked at me sadly, her eyes roaming me.
"And what's with the new look? Trying to impress somebody?" she asked in a strangled joke. I laughed.
"Caught me," I said and she looked down. "And do you know who the girl is?" I asked her, and she shook her head, staring at her hands. "You," I said simply. Her gaze snapped up, and her eyes widened a big deal.
"what?" she whispered. I was so nervous I swore any minute then I would combust.
"Bella, I was trying to impress you. I have loved you since the first time I saw you; and when you got mad at me yesterday and walked away, you took half of me with you. Bella, I love you so much it hurts. Please, Bella, I have to know how you feel about me," I said. She looked frozen. Rejection flowed through me, fast and hard.
"It's okay, Bella, I understand." I said and started walking away. Suddenly I heard Bella say something.
"What?" I asked, turning to look at her. This time she spoke louder.
"I love you too," she said, and my heart skipped a beat. I couldn't even begin to describe how alive I felt right then and there. A smile lit up my face and hers.
"Say it again," I demanded.
"I love you too," she complied. I gave a step towards her.
"Again," I ordered.
"I love you too," she said again. I would never get tired of those words. They-Bella- rocked my world in ways nobody would ever be able to. I took a step closer, and this time I reached out and helped Bella stand up. Electricity flowed through me at the touch. I loved her. I placed my right hand on her waist and the other to her cheek. I stared into her brown eyes, asking her silently if it was okay to kiss her. She nodded. That was all it took, before my lips attacked hers. It started passionate, and then it turned sweet. I smiled into the kiss and she did too.
"I love you," I said and she smiled brightly at me.
"I love you too," she said, and kissed me again. I realized the crowd behind me (which consisted of Emmett, Rose, Jasper and Alice cheering" and also the breeze from the night. I realized two things; one: my darkened world was now shinning, all it took was for Bella to be mine, so that it'd be light and warm again. Two: dreams do become true.
Hello everybody! So this is a one-shot I made that suddenly popped in my head and I was dying to write. :D And please, please, please, review. The onlt thing that will always encourage me to keep writing is recieving reviews ;) So, thanks for reading and I hope you liked my fanfiction.
P.S: REVIEW!! :D
Leah.