Disclaimer: I don not own Fullmetal Alchemist or anything related to it.
This is actually just a little story I wrote for my sister for Christmas. I decided to put it up on here for your enjoyment as well!
~*~
Ed, Al and Havoc quietly sneaked into the Colonel's office."Brother I don't think we should be doing this."
"That's only because you think we'll get caught."
"And if we are?"
"We have a perfectly good alibi. Now all I need to do is get my revenge." Ed said with the most devious smile Al had ever seen.
Last week Ed had fallen asleep on one of the couches in the office after he had finished with his work. Roy, the bastard, had thought it funny if he loosened some of the screws in Ed's automail. 2 hours later while eating dinner with Al his pinkie and index fingers fell off. Unfortunately they were eating soup that night and Ed had been using his right hand to hold his spoon. They ended up fishing them out of the soup.
To say the least Ed would have blown off Roy's head had it not been for Hawkeye and Al there. But Mustang wasn't going to get off so easily.
"You got the fake gloves, Ed?" Havoc asked. He also wanted to get back at the Colonel.
Roy had intentionally ruined one of his dates last week. The girl had been gorgeous and talented. Let's just say the 'coffee' Roy had given him in the office that day wasn't just coffee. Havoc ended up forgetting all about his date and Roy knowing where and when his date was supposed to be took the girl out himself saying that Havoc had 'fallen ill'.
"Well yeah I have them." Ed stated in a huffy whisper. They sneaked into the room til they got to the Colonel's desk. The flame alchemist had left for lunch and always left his gloves in the second to last drawer in his desk. Ed opened the drawer as silently as possible. He dug in his pockets for a moment and then pulled out a pair of gloves almost identical.
"So what's different about the one's you made against the Colonel's?"
"I just used a different material. His are specifically made out of ignition cloth. This is just regular cloth. His feels rougher too. Rose helped make them though. I'll have to thank her later."
Ed found Roy's real gloves in the back of the drawer. He quickly switched the pairs of gloves and stuffed Roy's into his pockets.
"Ta-da! Now let's go before someone sees." They all bolted out of the room. As soon as they were out of the room they all let out a sigh of relief.
"Now that were done sneaking around can we go eat?" Al questioned as he led the way to the cafeteria. Havoc and Ed followed close behind.
~*~
Roy walked through his front door. He was tired of starring at papers all day and was glad to be home. It was spring out but there was still a chill in the air. He took off his coat and slung it over the side of his couch. The alchemist pulled out his gloves from his pocket and put them on. It was just too much work to make a fire without alchemy, or he was just lazy. With the famous snap of his fingers…nothing happened.
"What the?" Roy snapped his fingers again. And again nothing happened. He snapped 3 more times and all he got was a small puff of smoke.
*This can't be right! Theses are my gloves why aren't they working?!*
He pulled them off and looked at them. The alchemy circle on the back was perfect, not a stitch out of place. They were the same color they'd always been. The only thing that was different was the texture. These gloves were smoother and had more of a soft feel.
*These aren't my gloves.*
At that moment he knew who to suspect.
~*~
Ed walked into the Colonel's office. Apparently the Colonel had something to discuss with him. *Either it's something important or he just wanted to be the bastard he is and make me come in on my day off.*
He closed the door behind him. Colonel Mustang sat at his desk same as always. Only he seemed more serious than usual by the look on his face.
"Fullmetal?"
"Yes?"
Mustang lifted a pair of gloves off his desk. "Do you know what these are?"
Inside his mind Edward was laughing. He couldn't laugh out loud yet or Roy would catch on to his and Havoc's prank if he hadn't already.
"Those are your ignition gloves." He replied making sure that his voice gave no hint of laughter.
"Wrong. These are not my ignition gloves."
Ed gave him a puzzled look. "Well then who else uses flame alchemy?"
"I don't think anyone would use these gloves for flame alchemy." Roy pulled one glove on and snapped his fingers. It did nothing but make a puff of smoke. He then pulled the glove off.
At this point Ed would have been hysterical if he were laughing out loud. He would have to make sure he told Havoc that it worked and include every detail.
"These are imitations of my gloves."
"Why would someone make imitations of your gloves?"
"I don't know, Fullmetal. You tell me." A smirk crawled onto the bastards face.
*Shit, he knows.* Ed thought.
"But these are my gloves." Roy pulled out his real gloves from his pockets.
Ed's jaw dropped. How had he gotten his gloves back?! He had hid them in his and al's apartment living room. Better yet how had he figured out that it had been him in the first place?
"Nice try, Fullmetal." Roy poised his hand right at Ed fingers ready to snap.
~*~
Hawkeye and Havoc sat right outside Roy's office. The Colonel had told them to call Edward and tell him that they needed to talk immediately. So far they hadn't heard any yelling from Ed or rude comments echoing from the room, but not for long.
Suddenly they heard a scream. They had never heard Edward scream until now. There was a snap and then another scream. There was silence. Hawkeye was standing near the door with her gun at the ready while Havoc stood back away from the door.
"You don't think the Colonel would kill him do ya?" Havoc muttered.
The door burst open almost falling off its hinges. Ed ran out screaming, "Get him away from me!" There was a small flame on the tail of his coat and parts of his hair and clothes were singed. Hawkeye grabbed Ed around his stomach to stop him while Havoc attempted to put the little flame out.
Roy stood in the middle of his office looking on this scene. He had the biggest and almost pure evil smirk anyone would ever see. He walked out of his office out towards the others. Hawkeye let go of Ed as soon as she was sure that he wouldn't run away. Havoc stood near Hawkeye in case the Colonel really had gone insane. Roy bent down next to Edward.
"I didn't burn you, did I?"
There was a pause of shocked silence. Did the Colonel really ask Ed if he was ok? Maybe he had lost it. Then Ed burst into a rant.
"Almost you freak! Are you really trying to kill me?! Because I could have died! Lucky you I can dodge shit fast!"
"Well good, and if you don't want to die I would suggest not stealing my gloves." Roy looked over towards Havoc who was now hiding behind Hawkeye after discovering that this was about their prank.
"That goes for you as well, Havoc."
"Ye-ye-yes sir."
"Alright then, back to work." Roy strutted back into his office as if nothing had happened.
Hawkeye then said, "You both must be bigger idiots than I thought."
She went back to her desk leaving Havoc and Ed stunned wondering how their brilliant plan had failed.
~*~
Roy closed the door to his office. "Okay Al, you can come out now."
Al crawled out from under one of the extra desks in the room. "That was great, Colonel. I don't think I've ever heard brother scream that high before."
"Thanks but if it hadn't been for you they'd be the ones laughing."
"Well it serves Ed right after he stuck marshmallows up my nose last week while I was sleeping."
After Roy had found that his gloves were imitations he called Ed and Al's phone. Luckily Al had answered and knew where his real gloves were. Al wanting revenge for the marshmallow incident and Roy for his gloves they came up with a plan and it had worked flawlessly.
"Yeah that's true. Want some tea?"
"Sure."
Ed and Havoc would never know how easily they had been tricked.
