Chapter 1

The rest of the summer after the hostage situation at Joey's school had gone by without incident. Morgan and Mina got married in late June in a beautiful outdoor ceremony. Reid and Amy finally set the date for their wedding, but they were going to wait another year for the next August. Everything was going fine. The BAU was solving case after case, Kahlan wasn't doing anything to worrisome at her job, or at least nothing that Hotch knew about, and school started back up and everyone was happy, well, almost everyone.

After the buses had left with their children on the first day of school, Hotch searched the house trying to find Kahlan to tell her goodbye, and when he finally went downstairs and found her, his heart clenched. She was sitting on Wyatt's bed with Daddy Lump clutched to her chest and she had tears in her eyes. "Aww, Babe," he said and wrapped a tender arm around her shoulders as he sat down beside her.

She sniffed and then looked at him. "They're almost in high school."

He smiled. "That's still a year away. They just started eighth grade."

She huffed. "And the year is going to fly by, and then they'll be driving, and then they'll be dating seriously, and then they'll leave for college, and then. . ."

He stopped her babbling by sealing his lips on hers and pulling her close. Once he pulled away, they were both breathing heavily. "Let's get them through middle school before you send them off to face the rest of their lives, please."

"But it's coming," she told him and the sadness in her eyes made him pull her closer.

"We'll still have Joey, even when that happens."

And that made her actually break down and sob, and he cringed. Is this an 'I'm old' thing again or is this fear of an empty nest? He almost pointed out that even once Joey was older, they'd still have all of their official and unofficial nieces and nephews, but he knew that wouldn't help at the moment. He took a deep breath. "Come on, Babe. We still have plenty of time with all of them."

She pulled back and looked him in the eyes. "And what are you going to do when your little angel starts middle school, or, my God, high school?"

He swallowed back the lump that had formed instantly and tried to give her a smile. "I'm hoping by that time that Reid will develop some super-secret formula to turn back the hands of time and make her little again," he joked because actually thinking about that was just too frightening.

She laughed. "I want that formula now. My little boys are getting too damn big."

He sighed and pulled her back into a hug. Wyatt was almost as tall as her already and Jack had sprouted up over the summer, too, and Hotch figured he'd be pretty close to Kahlan's height by the end of the year. He stood up and pulled her up next to him. "We need to get going before we're both late."

She inhaled deeply through her nose and shook her head. "Sometimes life sucks."

He chuckled and pulled her to him again. "Yes, yes it does."

XXX

Later that morning, Hotch was telling Rossi about Kahlan's mini meltdown, and Rossi looked at him. "Ever thought about having another baby? Maybe giving her another child to hold on too as the boys get older will make it easier on her."

Hotch pursed his lips as he thought about it for a moment. "Is that even possible with what she's going through?"

Rossi laughed. "I thought you did your research when all of this started?" Hotch's look told him did but was still looking for his opinion. "Yes, Aaron. I think they can get pregnant until they actually hit menopause or go a year with a period."

Hotch took a deep breath. "I'm not sure our lives could even handle a baby at this point, let alone if she even wants one. She hasn't said anything about wanting one."

Rossi shrugged. "It was just a suggestion. Maybe you should ask her."

Hotch licked his lips. "I guess there isn't any harm in that."

Garcia put her head in the door. "We're ready, Sir."

Hotch nodded and they both followed her to the conference room.

XXX

About two weeks later, when Hotch and Kahlan were in the family room alone after the kids went to bed, he grabbed up her hand as she was unconsciously rubbing it up and down his chest as they watched TV. "Have you ever thought about having another baby?"

That startled her and she sat up and looked at him the shock evident on her face. "What?"

He half shrugged. "I was just wondering."

She studied him. "Do you want to have another baby?"

He mentally winced. I hate it when she turns things back on me. He licked his lips. "I don't know."

"Don't you think we're a little old for that?"

The tone she used didn't give any of her own feelings away and Hotch mentally winced again. He took a deep breath. "On some days, but on others. . ."

Her brows furrowed. "Are you trying to tell me you want to have another baby?"

"Are you saying you don't?"

She huffed as she smiled. "I'm sorry that I broke down and had a moment where I wish my boys were still little. I'll try to keep that to myself for now on."

He grabbed her hand. "That's not what I want. I was just thinking that if you wanted to. . . I just thought. . ." He sighed. "I would do anything to make you happy."

She smiled and cupped the side of his face. "I'm happy with our family just the way it is. We have a perfect full house."

His brows furrowed as he studied her. Their house wasn't overly crowed.

She giggled at his confusion. "I have my three perfect men, and you have your two girls. It's a full house."

He smiled. "And my girls are perfect, too. You all mean the world to me."

"I know." She scooted back up against him. "And I know I will cry when the boys start high school, and I will cry when Joey starts middle school, and I will cry at every life changing step they take, but I do not want another child. I am perfectly happy with the kids we have."

He took a deep breath and relaxed a little. "And your allowed to cry; just don't make fun of me when I do, too."

She giggled. "I love you."

"I love you, too, Babe."

She pulled away from him and flicked her brows. "But just because we don't want one, doesn't mean we can't pretend to try."

His dimples emerged with his wide grin. "Mrs. Hotchner, are you coming on to me?"

She jumped up and started for the stairs. "Yes, but if our too tired. . ."

He jumped up and ran after her after turning the TV off and throwing the remote down. "I never said that!"

XXX

Two months later, Hotch was thinking about that night. It was the last time they had made love and he was starting to hate his job in some ways. It seemed like every time he wasn't on a case, she was always gone with one of the kids to a game, practice, school functions, or so many other things. He shook his head. It was getting hard for him to concentrate. And I can't believe I thought we needed to add another child to the mix. We can't even get any time with the three we have.

XXX

Finally, two weeks later. He crawled into bed beside the woman of his dreams after he took his shower. Way too many dreams lately! He had been away on a case for the last six days, and had gotten home late, but Kahlan made sure that he knew she'd be waiting up for him. She took a deep breath as she turned into him. "God! I love the way you smell fresh out of the shower!" she exclaimed as her hands trailed up his sides.

He chuckled as his hands went to her back and pulled her even closer. "You smell pretty damn amazing, too," he told her and pulled her into a kiss. The kiss started slow and passionate, but soon want and need pushed them into a frenzy.

When she finally pulled away, she was panting. "God, it has too damn long!" she exclaimed as she peeled off her t-shirt and threw it onto the floor.

He couldn't even speak; he just nodded and pushed off his boxers and then helped her out of her shorts and panties. As soon as she was naked, his mouth went to her body and he started kissing and sucking and biting as his hands worked her breasts. He couldn't tell if she was moaning quietly or actually purring, but it drove him even crazier. He started down her body as she spread her legs eagerly, and as soon as his tongue connected with her wet, hot folds, she let out a whine that told him exactly how much she wanted him. He chuckled and started a finger into her as she squirmed.

"Yes, Aaron!"

He slid in another finger and started to speed up his assault as his other hand went to press on her bundle of nerves and she bucked against him so violently she almost tossed him off the bed, and that made his alpha howl.

"Daddy."

They froze, wondering if they actually just heard what they thought they'd heard.

"Mommy."

They always kept their door locked when they were doing adult things even though the kids never went into their room without being told to. They preferred to be safe rather than sorry. Hotch jumped up and grabbed his sweats and put them on. "I'll go."

Kahlan nodded and she threw the cover over her as she tried to get her breathing back to normal.

After a few minutes and her husband not coming back, she got up to go see what was going on. She wrapped her robe around her and found Hotch in the guest bathroom. She put her hand on his back. "What's wrong?"

He grimaced. "She's got a fever," he told her as he searched through the medicine cabinet.

She moved passed him and pulled open the top drawer. She handed him the children's Tylenol and dosage cup. "I'll go get her a cold drink."

He nodded and went back into his daughter's room. Kahlan came in a few minutes later with a glass of ice water and sat down on the bed on the opposite side of Joey. Joey took a sip and then leaned into her father. "Can I sleep with you?" she whined. Joey never whined unless she wasn't feeling well.

He looked at Kahlan over her head, and she could see the conflicting emotions in his eyes. Yes, he wanted to continue what he had started but he also wanted to comfort his baby girl. Kahlan gave him a smile and pat Joey on the back. "Sure Pumpkin."

Hotch stood up and pulled her into his arms and carried her to their bedroom with Kahlan following. She pulled back the covers for them and Hotch laid down and Joey snuggled right into Kahlan's spot at his side. She smiled and went and put her pajamas back on in the bathroom. Then she crawled in and started rubbing circles on Joey's back. Hotch leaned down and kissed Joey on the top of the head. "Go to sleep, Angel. I got you."

XXX

The next morning, Joey still had a slight fever so Kahlan decided to keep her home from school and took the day off. She walked Hotch to the door as he was leaving. He kissed her and gave her a smile. "Maybe we won't get a case and I'll be home for dinner. . . and other things."

She grinned. "God I hope so."

He chuckled and then left and Kahlan snuggled up with Joey for a lazy day on the couch.

XXX

Hotch couldn't get that lucky, though, and he sank into the jet seat as he text his wife and told her they were headed to Arkansas to help stop a serial killer.

'If the case takes too long, I will have to Skype you. '

He shook his head as a shiver ran down his back as he imagined what that would be like. They had used Skype all the time to allow the kids to see him and such, but they had never actually used it at night. He blew out a breath and text her back. 'I'm not sure if that would make it better or worse.'

'LOL! Be safe!'

'Yes, Ma'am, and I'll call you tonight.'