I'm tired. Not that ordinary, oh maybe I stayed up too late tired, either. That the side of my tongue hurts like I spent several hours attacking it and it tried to escape the confines of my mouth through my right ear too before realizing it couldn't make it all the way out and sliding back down, leaving that part hurting too. On top of that, my eyes are so bloodshot they don't even look blue anymore. Maybe they were never blue. Maybe they were always red. And I'm actually albino. Then there's that all encompassing headache that never quite settles behind your eyes, but circles your scull.

There is a good reason for my suffering, though. Three days ago I slept with my best friend.

I'm sure it was a whim or something that made her kiss me and then clothes were shed and now here I am after a couple of sleepless nights and stomach crammed full of butterflies days. And she looks perfect, of course. Her eyes are clear and bright and she's dressed like any day now she's going to announce that she's running for president. And she probably could too. Who wouldn't vote for the perfect Carly Shay? She doesn't pretend like that night didn't happen either. She smiles at me in this special way that makes my stomach flip.

But right now she's looking at me with worried eyes as I blink kind of frog-like at her ceiling, looking like any moment now my tongue is going to snatch a fly out of the air.

"Sam? Are you okay?"

I shake my head, not blinking. "No. I've never been so not okay in my life."

It's a completely honest answer and she can tell. I'm lying flat on my back, on her bed and she just continues to sit there, staring at me.

"Is it because of that night?" Her voice is unsteady, which makes me smile.

"No. Freddie has just been such a dork lately that it makes me worried about the future of civilization."

"If you are wondering whether or not I regret it, I don't."

So I'm sitting up then, staring her in the eyes as if they could actually focus as tired as I am and giving her what had to be a really strange look.

"That is not an attractive expression." She tells me with a smile.

But I ignore her comment. "Can I kiss you?"

The smile slips from her face and she is suddenly giving me a very serious look. But she nods. So I lean in and delicately press my lips to hers. After a few seconds, I drop back onto the pillows.

"Goodnight."

Sleep overtook me immediately, despite it being four o' clock in the afternoon. She was still with me when I woke up the next morning.