Learning to be Happy
Disclaimer: I don't own the NCIS characters. Lauren is my only creation aside from the story.
AN: A Sequel to "You Deserve to be Happy" There is no real plot here; just a continuation of the love story of Jethro and Lauren.
Chapter One
NCIS Special Agent Jethro Gibbs has never been a patient person. Luckily for him the woman sitting by his hospital bed holding his hand and absently running her thumb back and forth across his knuckles is very patient. After being shot twice during a hostage incident Agent Gibbs barely survived several hours of surgery then spent two and a half days in the ICU before being moved to the room he was now unhappily occupying.
"Jethro will you please calm down? I know you want to go home but that is just not possible yet." This voice of reason belongs to Lauren Fuller the woman who for the past month has been living with Agent Gibbs. They met at the marina where Jethro keeps his boat and over the course of several weeks they quite unexpectedly fell in love. Lauren has been at the hospital night and day since Gibbs was shot, going home only briefly each day to shower and eat. At the moment Jethro is testing Lauren's considerable affection for him not to mention her patience.
"I can just as easily lay in bed at home as I can here. I don't see why I have to stay in the hospital just to lay around and sleep. I can take care of myself and I want to go home."
Lauren stifled a laugh at that last sentence and fixed Jethro with a firm stare. "First of all, your cannot take care of yourself at the moment. Have you forgotten that you can barely walk to the bathroom and back? You lost a considerable amount of blood and died – twice on the operating table just five days ago. You have a serious chest wound, Jethro, which requires you to stay in this hospital for at least two or three more days. I suggest you suck it up and stop wanting what you can't have." All while she was talking Lauren never let go of his hand and never stopped stroking her other hand up and down his arm. She stood up from her chair, leaned down and kissed Jethro softly on the mouth. His hand came up to tangle in her hair and hold her in place so he could take control of the kiss. When they had to break away for a breath Jethro traced his fingers down her face and brushed his thumb across her lips.
"I'm sorry Lauren, I don't mean to be angry at you. I just really hate hospitals, always have. I've been told many times I'm not a good patient. I know I'm not ready to be at home but I worry about you being here all the time."
Lauren motioned for Jethro to scoot over so she could sit on the bed with him. When she was situated next to him, Lauren carefully leaned down one hand on either side of Jethro's head and kissed him again. One of his hands smoothed up and down her arm and the other found its way to her thigh that was snug against his side. When she broke off the kiss she held her face very close to his. "Don't worry about me Jethro. I want all your energy going toward getting stronger so you can come home. I am right where I want to be, with you. And now I think I'd better go get some lunch before you and I get anymore carried away."
"Oh I don't know, I thought you liked it when we got carried away. I know I sure do." Mischief was dancing in Jethro's blue eyes as he pulled Lauren back for another kiss. A knock at the door interrupted them however and aide brought Jethro his lunch tray.
As she stood up Lauren said, "I'll be back in a couple of hours. Try and get some sleep after you eat, okay?"
"Sleeping is one thing I don't have a problem doing. Why don't you stay home for a while and relax. I know it's not very restful sitting here day after day. Ducky is coming by later and I'll be okay. Take some time for yourself, Lauren."
"Are you trying to get rid of me, Jethro? I will take some time this afternoon to catch up on things but I will be back later. Unless you don't want me to come back." Even as the words left her mouth Lauren didn't know why she said them. For some reason today she was feeling just a little unsure of where things stood with her and Jethro.
As she turned to leave Jethro caught her hand and held on. "Hey, what are you talking about? Of course I want you to come back. I'm just worried about you. I know you have been here all day every day and late every night. You have to be exhausted. I just want you to take care of yourself that's all. I love you Lauren."
"I love you too Jethro. You're right, I'm just tired today. I'll see you later."
Gibbs actually ate all his lunch for the first time hoping if he did so he would get some real food tomorrow. Tony and Ziva stopped by to check on him and talk about a case they were working. After they left, Gibbs fell asleep and was still sleeping when Ducky arrived. Ducky was Jethro's oldest, most trusted friend. He had known Jethro through three divorces and an on again off again relationship with Jenny Shepard that lasted for ten years. As Ducky sat by the bed watching Gibbs sleep he thought back to other times he had done the same thing. Too many times over the years Ducky had raced to the hospital because Jethro had been shot, stabbed, beaten or blown up. This had been a bad one, maybe the worst, but Jethro fought his way back and was going to be okay. Ducky thought Lauren had a lot to do with that. He had been watching Lauren the past week. Watching how she could calm or encourage Jethro with a touch or a smile. Ducky was impressed by her strength and patience and he knew she would need plenty of both if she was going to stay with Jethro which he fervently hoped she was.
Ducky's thoughts were interrupted by Jethro's doctor coming in the room and Jethro waking up at the same time. The doctor examined Jethro's wound, listened to his heart and lungs and read the chart. As he was finishing, Lauren walked in and Ducky noticed Jethro's mood improved immediately.
"Hi Ducky. Hello Dr. Ryan, how is our patient doing?" Lauren asked as she moved to stand next to Jethro and take his hand in hers.
"Agent Gibbs is making a very good recovery. All his reports are very encouraging especially considering the severity of his injury and the problems he had in surgery."
"When can I go home Doc?" asked Jethro impatiently.
"Well Agent Gibbs that depends. I believe in getting patients home as soon as possible as long as it is safe for them. From this point on, with proper care, I believe you will get stronger more quickly at home. Is there someone at home who can provide the basic care you will need for a few more weeks?"
Lauren spoke up and said, "Yes, Doctor, I will be there and I can provide whatever Jethro will need in the way of care."
"What kind of care are you taking about doctor?" Jethro asked with some concern in his voice.
"Well, you will not be at full strength for a few more weeks so someone will have to be there to help you move about your house especially if you have stairs. Your incision and wound site are healing nicely but will need to be checked routinely. You won't be able to drive or lift anything much for a while. Basically you won't be up to doing routine things alone for a while. It's nothing that requires a nurse just someone to be there with you to assist you."
Ducky could see Jethro was a bit upset by Dr. Ryan's answer so he said, "As you know, I'm Agent Gibbs' personal physician. I will be available at any time for anything he or Ms. Fuller may need help with."
"In that case I don't see why you can't go home Friday afternoon or Saturday morning. I would like to see you eating more and being a little more mobile before you leave but I think that can be accomplished in the next two days. Just continue as you have been doing, try to get up a little more often each day and I'll check back with you Friday. I'll be out of the hospital tomorrow but Dr. Walker will be available." Dr. Ryan looked at Ducky and Lauren and back to Jethro, "You're a lucky man Agent Gibbs and I'm not just speaking about medically."
"I know Doc, thanks."
"Good evening to you all."
When Dr. Ryan was gone, Lauren leaned down and gave Jethro a quick kiss. "That's great news I think, don't you?"
"Yeah I guess."
"Well try to curb your enthusiasm Jethro. My gosh just a few hours ago you were practically begging to go home and now when you've been told you can go in two days you're not happy What's going on?"
"Nothing's going on!" Jethro replied just a little too forcefully.
Lauren looked from Jethro to Ducky and back to Jethro. "Am I missing something? Help me out here guys because I thought that was great news but the patient doesn't seem to think so."
Ducky looked at Jethro and thought he knew what the problem was but he didn't say so. Instead he asked, "Jethro what's troubling you?"
"Hell Duck he made it sound like I'll be an invalid when I go home." There was more emotion in his voice than he would have liked. Jethro looked at Lauren and took a deep breath before he said, "This can't be what you wanted when you moved in with me. I don't want you to feel like you have to take care of me. I will understand if you don't want to deal with all this."
Lauren didn't answer for a long moment. She looked into Jethro's blue eyes, the eyes that she loved to get lost in, and said, "No it's not what I wanted to be doing when I moved in with you. I never wanted to see you lying nearly dead in a hospital and I never wanted you to need my help in this way but you do and I'm glad I can be here for you. I want you home Jethro. I want to be the one who takes care of you. If that is not what you want then you need to say so."
"That's not what I'm saying. I just meant I would understand if you wanted out."
"Would you really, because I sure wouldn't." Lauren was angry now and her voice was rising. "If I was hurt Jethro, would you walk away from me?"
"Of course not!"
"Then why would you even imagine I would do that to you?" Her voice had quieted and there were tears in her eyes.
"Because that's what always happens." Jethro's voice was so quiet Lauren almost didn't hear him. Jethro went on, "I'll be hard to live with Lauren. I'm a terrible patient especially at home. I'll be a bastard some days and I'll try your patience. I'll undoubtedly say things that hurt you. I'll get all closed up and shut you out. In my experience that's when things start to fall apart and I don't know how to stop it."
Ducky looked at Jethro in amazement. He couldn't believe Jethro had actually articulated his feelings and concerns so openly.
Lauren took Jethro's hand and raised it to her lips softly kissing his palm. "If you think you can scare me off with a few days of bad behavior you are sadly mistaken mister." Reaching out to stroke his face she continued, "I'm not those other women who disappointed you and hurt you. I won't leave you Jethro, I waited to long to find you to bail at the first sign of trouble. The only way I will leave is if you tell me you honestly don't want me there, that you don't love me anymore."
"Well I damn sure don't see that happening." Jethro pulled Lauren down and kissed her until Ducky coughed and got their attention. "Sorry Ducky, didn't mean to ignore you."
"That's quite alright, I need to get home to mother but I wonder if I could have a word with you Jethro before I go."
Lauren took the hint and said, "Why don't I go try to find Jethro some decent coffee and let you two talk. I'll see you later Ducky."
"Thank you my dear. I will see you tomorrow most likely." Ducky gave Lauren a quick hug as she left then turned his attention back to Jethro.
"What's on your mind Duck?"
"I wanted to tell you that I am proud of you for the way you explained yourself to Lauren just now. I know you were trying to warn her off but I truly believe Jethro, that you have found a woman you can't scare away. I think you will find that having told her all the bad things you could do, you probably won't do them. As I told you when you first met Lauren, the rest of us rarely see your bastard side anymore. You have changed my friend and that gives you a good chance to hang onto this lady I think."
"Thanks Ducky. I certainly don't want to chase Lauren away but I didn't want to chase Diane or Stephanie away either and somehow I did. Hell, I even managed to foul up Jenny and me and she knew me better than anyone else. Sometimes I worry that I'll screw it up without even knowing I'm doing it."
"Maybe you didn't want to chase Diane or Stephanie away but you didn't really want to keep them either. Jenny is a different story and can't be compared to your current relationship. You and she managed to foul that up together over the course of many years. Just try to relax Jethro and enjoy having someone love you. No one deserves their happiness more than you do my friend. Now I really must be going. I will see you tomorrow."
"Thank you again Ducky. I will do my best to follow your advice."
Lauren returned as Ducky was leaving. She gave Jethro his coffee saying, "It's not your favorite but it's the best I could do around here. I'm going to walk Ducky down to his car and I'll be right back."
When Lauren and Ducky were in the elevator she asked, "Does Jethro really think I would walk away from him and what we're trying to build together?"
"My dear, you have to understand, that is Jethro's experience with the women in his life. All the women he has loved, including Shannon, have left him. In her case not by choice of course but the others all chose to give up and leave. Maybe they had good reasons, I'm sure they thought so. Even Jennifer who I know loved Jethro very much left him in favor of advancing her career. So you see my dear, Jethro has no basis in his life experience to believe you won't leave him. It won't be easy for you to convince him otherwise because the only real proof is you being there the next day and the next and so on. Having said that I must tell you I have seen such a change in Jethro since you came into his life that I truly believe the two of you will make it. You are very good for him, Lauren. Don't let him scare you off."
"I won't Ducky. I love Jethro more than I ever expected to love anyone. I also really like him and respect him and I don't intend to let him get away from me. I think we are going to be just fine." They had arrived at the front entrance so Lauren hugged Ducky and told him goodnight.
When Lauren arrived back at the room, Jethro was sitting up in the chair. He said, "I thought I'd better start getting in shape to go home. Care to take a walk down the hall with me?"
Lauren took his hand and said, "I'd love to walk down the hall with you."
After a couple of laps around the hallway, Jethro's nurse cautioned him not to overdo it so they went back to the room. Not ready to get back into bed Jethro sat in a lounge chair and Lauren pulled another chair next to him.
"So, what did you and Ducky talk about on the way out?"
Lauren smiled and said, "He told me that you expect me to leave because that's what all the women you love have done. He said the only way to convince you otherwise is for me to be here day after day after day."
Jethro took her hand and looked into her eyes, "And what did you say?"
"I told him that is exactly what I intend to do. I told him I love you very much and I'm not going to let you scare me away."
Without letting go of her hand Jethro stood up and pulled Lauren to him. "I don't know how long I can stand up here babe but I really need to feel your arms around me. I need to hold you even if it's just for a couple of minutes."
Mindful of his wound, Lauren wrapped her arms around Jethro's waist and laid her head gently on his shoulder. Jethro snuck his hands under the hem of her sweater and skimmed his fingers lightly up and down her back while he buried his head in her hair. After a few moments Lauren raised her head and whispered, "Kiss me Jethro."
Jethro moved his hands to her hair and crushed her mouth with his in a needy, passionate kiss. Lauren responded, her tongue going deep into Jethro's mouth to duel with his. Jethro dropped one hand to Lauren's hips pulling her closer.
"Oh god baby you feel so good to me but I've gotta sit down". Lauren helped Jethro sit on the side of the bed then raised the bed so they could continue kissing. Lauren took Jethro's face in her hands and kissed him lightly all over before taking his mouth in another kiss full all the passion she felt for him. Jethro kissed her back then began kissing and sucking her throat while his hands made their way back under the sweater to tease and stroke her breasts. Lauren moaned and pulled Jethro's mouth back to her's.
"Jethro, honey we gotta stop, I don't want to hurt you."
"I'm okay. Just stay where you are another minute. Let me hold you. I've missed touching you so much. You feel so good to me Lauren."
"I've missed touching you too and having you touch me. I can't wait to get you home and get you well. Come on, let's get you back into bed."
"Join me?" Jethro said with a gleam in his eyes.
"Not tonight but hold that thought just a couple more days."
For the next two days Jethro ate everything put in front of him and asked for more. He walked up and down the hall so much he thought he would wear out the tiles. On Friday afternoon Dr. Ryan finally showed up and said Jethro could go home. After getting all the instructions for his care at home, Lauren gathered up Jethro's belongings and went to get the car while Jethro signed the release paperwork. Ducky wheeled Jethro out and they were on their way home at last. When she came to a stop in the driveway Lauren looked over at Jethro who had his head back and his eyes closed. She touched his arm and said, "Hey, sleepy head, we're home."
Jethro raised his head and looked out at his house. "It has never felt better to come home. Come on let's go in."
TBC
A.N.2: This story is completed I just need to get it typed and posted. Reviews are appreciated. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks.