Swedish Splendor
Note: This Lupin III fan-fiction happens after "Guardian Angels". Some time has passed and Carmen Lupin III is about 8 years old at this time. Young Christina Lupin III is falling in love with a native Japanese teenager about her age named Kunihiko Taeko.
"You're dead for a real long time, you just can't prevent it. So, if money can't by happiness, I'll guess I'll have to rent it."—some lyrics from "This Is The Life" sung by Weird Al Yankovic.
Cast
Carmen Lupin III: Fujiko Lupin III: Arsene Lupin III: Arsene Lupin IV: Jigen Daisuke: Christina Lupin III: (cameo) Dominique Lupin III:
Jean-Luke Lupin III: (cameo) Kunihiko Taeko: (cameo) Goemon: Zenigata: Bateau Tokinawa: (Zenigata's protégé) Maria II "Marie": Tochiro: Onsen: (more characters as they appear in the script)
Scene 1—Arsene Lupin III's house. Lupin is busily working on "figures". Outside, we see Arsene and Carmen playing blackjack. Arsene says, "Now you're getting the hang of it, Carmen. You're getting really good at blackjack." Carmen laughs. Soon, there is a call on the phone. Lupin fumbles the phone.
Lupin III: (picks up phone) Yello ?
(Split screen)
Dominique: (curiously) Have you been watching the news, Arsene ?
Lupin III: (a little upset) Are you nuts ?! No ! I haven't had time to watch the news. I'm so busy. Thank heavens summer will soon be here so I can take an extended vacation.
Dominique: (mischievously) Wonderful sense of timing God has, isn't it...
Lupin III: (becoming interested) What do you mean by that, Dominique ?
Dominique: (sigh) Well, sooner or later I thought you'd find out...But, there is rumored to be some Nazi gold in Sweden and this gold is worth much...
Lupin III: Nazi gold ?! (excitedly) Really ?
Dominique: Yeah, but it hasn't been documented yet. (pause) We'll be the first to see if this news is true or false.
Lupin III: (overjoyed) Pack your bags, sweetheart...We're going to Sweden ! (pause) I gotta tell Fuji about the good news ! She'll be delighted !
Dominique: Splendid ! (claps hands) I'll be seeing you later. God bless.
Lupin III: You too. (they hang up their phones at the same time. With a silly grin on his face, Lupin stands up and clicks his heals together jovially.)
Scene 2—Dominique's House
Christina: (pouting) You're leaving again ?
Dominique: (hugging her daughter and kissing her on the lips) It's not that terribly bad, now is it ?
Christina: (exhales) I guess not. (short pause) I could keep Goemon II and June company...
Dominique: (spirited) That's the spirit, Christina ! You keep your father company as well.
Jean: (sneaking behind Dominique, taps her on the shoulder) Boo !
Dominique: (startled) Jean ! Don't do that !
Christina: (laughs) I'm going to go say goodbye to Mr. Daisuke.
Jean: Come back at 6:00 !
Christina: Oh, dad...Don't worry ! (rushes out of the house)
Jean: It's been 8 years since we've had this kind of quiet. Just when I'm getting to enjoy my time with you...(embraces her) You have to go off on another caper.
Dominique: Jean, I have to live my life this way...It's all I know. I can't even explain why I am like this, but all I've ever known was stealing.
Jean: (confused) Will this stealing ever end ? I mean, realisticly when you become elderly you won't be able to steal anymore...What will you do then ?
Dominique: (kisses her husband affectionatley) I will spend the rest of my years with you. I don't care if Christina becomes a lawyer in the future, that doesn't matter to me. I couldn't be any happier with the twists and turns the game of life has offered me. (Jean hugs her tightly)
Jean: I'm going to miss you, ma chere. (kisses Dominique)
Dominique: (in a druken daze) Ja ! (laughs) I will too. But, don't worry, I'll return in one piece like I always have. I have a dozen angels guarding my ever step. You'll be with me in spirit as well.
Jean: I'll pray for you every night ! (kisses her again)
Dominique: You know, Jean...You make it very difficult for me to leave.
Jean: (cell phone beeps) Another case ? (in disbelief) I can't believe it ! (sighs, to himself) I hope I'm home in time to fix dinner for Christina. What am I thinking...She can make her own dinner. (to Dominique) Goodbye ! Take care !
Dominique: I will, don't worry. (waves goodbye to her hubby)
Scene 3—Plane To Sweden
Lupin III: Has everyone brought enough supplies to keep us alive ?
Fujiko: I did ! (opens up compact and puts on makeup) A woman must leave home with the essentials !
Carmen: (happily) I get to go on my first caper !
Arsene Lupin IV: Carmen, remember...you're playing with the big boys now so you gotta be careful. (pats his sister on the back) Besides, I'll be watching your back if any one tries to hurt you.
Carmen: (hugs her brother) You're a peach, Arsene !
Arsene: (blushes)
Jigen: (loading gun) I've got what's most precious to me in my pocket. (pulls out picture of Mary and June, looks at it, kisses it, and places the gun in that pocket with the picture.
Goemon: (looking at Goemon) He's rather sentimental today...isn't he ?
(They all laugh a little and enjoy the flight to Sweden)
Dominique: (hears her stomach growl) I hope we get there soon because I am famished !
Lupin III: Just a few more hours and we'll be there. I've got us booked at a nice restaurant in the countryside. I'm sure you'll like it.
Fujiko: Marvelous ! Then, we can go to sleep and start searching the country for the Nazi gold.
Lupin III: Bingo ! (smiles)
Scene 4—The Restaurant
(They plane touches down and Lupin III and the gang stop at the restaurant for a quick bite to eat. Zenigata, Bateau, Tochiro and Onsen are outside waiting for Marie's signal. Marie is incognito as a waitress. None of them suspect that Marie is in disguise because she is wearing a curly blonde wig that looks real.)
Marie: (on communicator) Zenigata ?
Zenigata: Yes ?
Marie: They're on their way in. When they leave, I'll give the signal...
Zenigata: What about you ? What are you going to do, just stand there and do nothing ?
Marie: No, father...You silly coot !
Zenigtata: How dare you speak to your father that way !
(The others are laughing hysterically)
Zenigata: SHUT UP !
(Silence)
Marie: I will follow from behind and pin Dominique. Then, you get the others.
Zenigata: (still a little angered by what his daughter said) Sure. Over and out.
(Lupin III and the others sit down. Dominique eyes the menu with anticipation. Soon, Marie comes to serve them, under the name "Claire".)
Marie: Are you ready to order ?
Jigen: (big smile) You bet !
Lupin III: Anytime, sweet-cakes !
Fujiko: (clears throat)
Lupin: Oh, (nervous laugh) sorry. I mean, (sweetly) "Claire".
Marie: (bowing) Thank you !
(They order, and the boys outside are playing gin rummy.)
Tochiro: (educated) I believe I have won once again.
Onsen: No fair ! You cheated !
Zenigata: (growls in disgust) I wish they would hurry up and eat. I don't have all day to wait for Wolf...(sighs, and then falls asleep)
Tochiro: The old man fell asleep again.
Onsen: Ah, crud...He always does this. (pause) Zenigata !
Zenigata: (shocked) Huh ? What did I miss ?
Onsen: Oh, (short sigh) nothing.
Tochiro: We're just making sure you stay awake. (pauses to get some black coffee from a canteen of his own, and pours a cup for Zenigata) Coffee ?
Zenigata: Why, thank you. (Takes a drink) Alright ! Now, I'm fired up ! Lemme at 'em ! Lemme at 'em !
Onsen: Calm down, Zen ! (hands on Zen's shoulders) Wolf's still eating...
Zenigata: (grumpy) Jeez, it takes him an awful long time to eat !
(Soon, Marie gives the signal that Lupin and the gang are done with their meal. Without any warning, Dominique is pinned down, losing her sword. "RUN !", she screams. Goemon is the first to hear her and runs ahead. )
Goemon: Better move it.
Jigen: Crap ! Zenigata's found us !
(Lupin, Jigen and Goemon are the only ones that get away.)
Scene 5—The Hotel
(Lupin notices his room is nice and tidy. All of the gang's stuff is in the room, neat, and organized. He is exhausted from running. Jigen sits on the same bed that Lupin does. Goemon sits on the floor, quietly mediating.)
Lupin: (sadly) They've got my boy and my wife !
Jigen: We'll get them back !
Goemon: They will pay for capturing a fellow samurai.
Lupin: We have a slight problem though ?
Jigen: (curiously) What's that ?
Lupin: (feeling stupid) I don't know where the stinking jail is !
Goemon: (groans)
Lupin: I know, I know ! It's terrible ! I've been here and there, but in Sweden...I know nothing.
Jigen: (patting Lupin on the back, assuredly) We all know that feeling.
Goemon: We're all at a loss here. (short pause) Zenigata's got us on this one.
Jigen: (hitting the bed with his fist) Zenigata ! (hits the bed again) Curse that rotten Zenigata !
Lupin: Guys, we need some time to think about this. Let's just take a rest...and see what tomorrow brings.
Goemon: Sleep replenishes the soul.
Jigen: Yeah. True.
(They all fall asleep, while Lupin figures out how to trick Zenigata...)
Scene 6—The Rescue !
(Lupin wakes up the next day, eats a complimentary breakfast in bed. The others join in, and Lupin discusses a brilliant plan...)
Lupin: Alright ! Now, you're probably wondering what my imagination has concocted overnight...Am I right ?
Jigen/Goemon: (unenthusiastically) Yes.
Lupin: Ok, I've got police outfits in my suitcase that we can change into for such a dilemma ! (throws them the suits)
Jigen: Ooo ! Not shabby !
(They quickly change into the outfits)
Goemon: This looks very tacky on a warrior, you know ?
Jigen: (laughs)
Lupin: Come on ! We don't have time to fool around. We've got people to rescue.
(They quickly head on the road via taxi, and are quickly taken to the jail, thanks to their costumes.)
Lupin: (whispering to Jigen and Goemon in the cab) It's working !
(The cabby drops them off.)
Cab Driver #1: (a northern Swedish accent) Here's your stop, officers.
Lupin: Thank you, kind Sir.
Jigen: Yeah, thanks !
Goemon: (bows a little)
Cab Driver #1: No problem ! Just doing my job ! (drives away)
Lupin: (giggles) Ooo ! We're close now !
(They walk right past the guards who let them in, not knowing who they really are. Lupin asks the warden where Fujiko, Dominique and Arsene are.)
Warden: (lilting Swedish accent) Follow me.
(Lupin, Jigen and Goemon follow the Warden. Dominique is in a cell playing "Since My Baby Left Me" on a harmonica. Fujiko is singing soulfully. Arsene is pretending to play bongo drums.)
Warden: Here they are. (pause)
Jigen: We would like to investigate the criminals for any stolen narcotics that they might've taken into your country.
Warden: Suits me. (Walks away)
Jigen: (triumphantly with a short laugh) Narcotic searches fool wardens almost all the time !
Goemon: You're just fortunate that warden fell for our disguises...
Dominique: (placing harmonica in pocket) Are you who I think you are ?
Lupin: Yes, indeed ! The one and the only !
Arsene: Father !
Fujiko: Get us out of here...I can't stand being locked up in closed areas...
Lupin/Jigen: Goemon, you do the honors.
Goemon: Delighted. (slashes at the iron bars and they fall to the ground, crumbling)
Arsene: (to Goemon as they all escape) You have got to teach me how to do that, Goemon !
(They all run away, and the alarms are sounded. Zenigata is in an office somewhere where he receives a call from the Warden.)
Scene 7—The Chase
Zenigata: WHAT ?! He got away ! (shakes head back and forth) I can't believe it !
(The next scene shows up by the last scene being "pushed" out of the way. We see Zenigata in a car, chasing Lupin and the gang who are now sandwiched in a taxi, and very uncomfortable at the moment )
Zenigata: The chase begins ! I am the hunter, and you, Lupin are the hunted !
Arsene: Man ! Dad, does that guy ever shut up ?
Lupin: (frankly) Nope.
Fujiko: We have to get moving, Cabby !
Cab Driver #2: (Southern Denmark accent, a female driver) I'm going ! I've never driven this fast before !
Lupin: Well, if you can't lady...Then, let me show you how. (climbs up into the front seat and she climbs into the back)
Cab Driver #2: (waves, nervously) H-Hey. How are you doing today ? Ha, ha. Nice weather we're having in Sweden, eh ?
Lupin: (steps on the gas)
Cab Driver #2: (screams) OH, MY !
Scene 8—Nazi Gold...How Are We Gonna Take This Home ?
(Fujiko looks back and sees that Zenigata is no longer in sight. On the way, Zenigata's car breaks down and Marie and the others have to fix it. There is a castle in the distance. Could this be where the so called "Nazi gold" is ?)
Lupin: (abruptly stopping, everyone in the car jerks) I think this is it !
Arsene/Carmen: Whiplash !
Cab Driver #2: (uncovering eyes) I-Is it over ?
Fujiko: (hand on Cab Driver's shoulder) It's over. But, we still need your cab, if you don't mind.
Cab Driver #2: (still a little overwhelmed) O-okay. (pause) I'll find my own way home.
Jigen: Wait ! (pause) Here's your fee !
Cab Driver #2: (blushing a little) Thank you, Sir. I really don't need this, since (pointing at Lupin) he did most of the driving. (Laughs) But, (bows) thank you ! (waves for a driver to pick her up, and she is picked up and taken home)
Dominique: She was very kind to let us borrow her car.
Goemon: Do you think she knew that...
All: (except Goemon who shakes his head right and left) Nah.
Arsene: She didn't know, she couldn't have known that we're thieves.
Fujiko: (looking at the huge castle) The gold must be in there ! (sly smile) I have a good feeling about it.
Lupin: (leading the way) Come on ! (pause) According to the legend, I think I know where the gold is located. (directing) Hurry !
(Fujiko and the rest of the gang follow Lupin into the basement of the castle where they find treasure chest upon treasure chest of Nazi gold...)
Carmen: (amazed) WOW !
Lupin: We can't possibly take all of this home.
(All of them are shocked except for Carmen and Arsene)
Arsene: Father's right. We have to leave some gold here, in memory of the Jews who lost their lives to the Nazis in World War II.
Carmen: (bowing, solemnly) May they rest in peace.
Jigen: (to Fujiko, being extremely serious, as usual) She's got a good point, Fuji !
Fujiko: (a little upset, but not too angered because he knows his children are right) Oh, alright ! Let's take what we've got and split !
(They run to the cab and Lupin floors it. On the way, they pass Zenigata. They all taunt him.)
Zenigata: Arrrrrgh ! (shakes fist in the air)
Marie: Give it up, dad ! They've gotten away again.
Zenigata: (hits car with fist) Piece of junk ! (kicks the car)
Onsen: (actually being "smart" for once) Why don't I just call the Towing Service and have our car towed !
Tochiro: Oh, why didn't you think of that in the first place, Onsen ?
Onsen: Because I'm not a moron who doesn't know how to fix cars !
Zenigata: (irate) Will you just slag off ?!
Onsen/Tochiro: (saluting) Yes, SIR !
Marie: (laughs)
Bateau: (to himself) I wanna go home...
Scene 9—Young Love
(The gang heads home on the airplane. On the way back, they watch an in- flight movie called "Sleepy Eyes Of Death".)
Dominique/Goemon: This movie is a classic ! (Goemon and Dominique look at each other and laugh. The rest of them laugh.)
(Plane touches down, and the gang goes home and Christina and playing Samurai Shodown 3 with Kunihiko. Dominique's House )
Christina: (pausing the game) Mom's home !
Kunihiko: (following Christina, quietly) Why is she lugging a treasure chest behind her ?
Christina: (whispering back) I thought I told you already, Kuni ! She's a thief.
Kunihiko: (dumbly) Oh. (nervous laugh) Sorry.
Dominique: (to her daughter) Who's your friend ?
Christina: This is Kunihiko Taeko.
Kunihiko: (bows) Pleasured to meet you, ma'am.
Jean-Luke: (walking in late) Sorry I'm late, everyone ! Today's case was a real bear.
Dominique: Jean, go ahead and take it easy, hon. You need some rest.
Jean: (quickly kissing Dominique) You are too good to me, dear.
Dominique: (laughing girlishly, she fixes dinner. From the kitchen, she calls her daughter.) Would Kunihiko like some dinner ?
Kunihiko: (smiling) Sure !
Christina: (embarrassed) Mother...You really shouldn't trouble yourself.
Dominique: (winks to her daughter, to herself) Ah, young love. Such a precious thing it is, I hope she can later become his wife...Seems like such a nice boy.
(Dominique makes dinner for the family)
Scene 10—Dinner
Dominique: Supper is ready !
Jean: (smelling the food) Smells delicious my dear ! You never cease to amaze me with your exquisite cooking !
(As we see family and friends chat and talk, we are taken to different houses where other families are eating, the Daisuke Family, The Lupin family and the Ishikawa family. In the background we can hear a familiar melody..."Everlasting Love" as sung by Gloria Estevan. Then we see "The End" written on the screen in cursive. Credits roll, Bloopers...)
Blooper #1...Coffee
Tochiro: Coffee ?
Zenigata: (taking coffee) Why thank you ! (Drinks coffee, pause) Alright ! Now I'm fired up ! Ok, lemme at 'em ! Lemme at 'em ! (laughs hysterically) Sorry, I can't help it...(laughs)
(the other actors and actresses laugh as well)
Director: (lowering head) Cut...
Blooper #2...Cab Driver #2
Jigen: Wait ! (pause) Here's your fee !
Cab Driver #2: (blushing) Thank you, you handsome stud you !
Jigen: Uh, I don't think that was in the script.
Cab Driver #2: Oops !
(The others are laughing out loud)
Director: CUT !
Blooper #3...The Lost "Plane" Scene
Lupin: (watching movie) "Sleepy Eyes of Death", eh ?
Fujiko: You've never seen this movie ?
Lupin: No. This would be the first time that I've seen it.
(All are shocked)
Goemon: You haven't lived until you've seen "Sleepy Eyes of Death".
Jigen: You're gonna love this movie.
Dominique: Yeah ! ()
(All start babbling about certain scenes that might give away the plot...)
Lupin: Would you guys pipe down, I'm tryin' to watch the movie !
All: (except Lupin) Sorry !
By: Elizabeth Berndt August 4, 1999
Note: This Lupin III fan-fiction happens after "Guardian Angels". Some time has passed and Carmen Lupin III is about 8 years old at this time. Young Christina Lupin III is falling in love with a native Japanese teenager about her age named Kunihiko Taeko.
"You're dead for a real long time, you just can't prevent it. So, if money can't by happiness, I'll guess I'll have to rent it."—some lyrics from "This Is The Life" sung by Weird Al Yankovic.
Cast
Carmen Lupin III: Fujiko Lupin III: Arsene Lupin III: Arsene Lupin IV: Jigen Daisuke: Christina Lupin III: (cameo) Dominique Lupin III:
Jean-Luke Lupin III: (cameo) Kunihiko Taeko: (cameo) Goemon: Zenigata: Bateau Tokinawa: (Zenigata's protégé) Maria II "Marie": Tochiro: Onsen: (more characters as they appear in the script)
Scene 1—Arsene Lupin III's house. Lupin is busily working on "figures". Outside, we see Arsene and Carmen playing blackjack. Arsene says, "Now you're getting the hang of it, Carmen. You're getting really good at blackjack." Carmen laughs. Soon, there is a call on the phone. Lupin fumbles the phone.
Lupin III: (picks up phone) Yello ?
(Split screen)
Dominique: (curiously) Have you been watching the news, Arsene ?
Lupin III: (a little upset) Are you nuts ?! No ! I haven't had time to watch the news. I'm so busy. Thank heavens summer will soon be here so I can take an extended vacation.
Dominique: (mischievously) Wonderful sense of timing God has, isn't it...
Lupin III: (becoming interested) What do you mean by that, Dominique ?
Dominique: (sigh) Well, sooner or later I thought you'd find out...But, there is rumored to be some Nazi gold in Sweden and this gold is worth much...
Lupin III: Nazi gold ?! (excitedly) Really ?
Dominique: Yeah, but it hasn't been documented yet. (pause) We'll be the first to see if this news is true or false.
Lupin III: (overjoyed) Pack your bags, sweetheart...We're going to Sweden ! (pause) I gotta tell Fuji about the good news ! She'll be delighted !
Dominique: Splendid ! (claps hands) I'll be seeing you later. God bless.
Lupin III: You too. (they hang up their phones at the same time. With a silly grin on his face, Lupin stands up and clicks his heals together jovially.)
Scene 2—Dominique's House
Christina: (pouting) You're leaving again ?
Dominique: (hugging her daughter and kissing her on the lips) It's not that terribly bad, now is it ?
Christina: (exhales) I guess not. (short pause) I could keep Goemon II and June company...
Dominique: (spirited) That's the spirit, Christina ! You keep your father company as well.
Jean: (sneaking behind Dominique, taps her on the shoulder) Boo !
Dominique: (startled) Jean ! Don't do that !
Christina: (laughs) I'm going to go say goodbye to Mr. Daisuke.
Jean: Come back at 6:00 !
Christina: Oh, dad...Don't worry ! (rushes out of the house)
Jean: It's been 8 years since we've had this kind of quiet. Just when I'm getting to enjoy my time with you...(embraces her) You have to go off on another caper.
Dominique: Jean, I have to live my life this way...It's all I know. I can't even explain why I am like this, but all I've ever known was stealing.
Jean: (confused) Will this stealing ever end ? I mean, realisticly when you become elderly you won't be able to steal anymore...What will you do then ?
Dominique: (kisses her husband affectionatley) I will spend the rest of my years with you. I don't care if Christina becomes a lawyer in the future, that doesn't matter to me. I couldn't be any happier with the twists and turns the game of life has offered me. (Jean hugs her tightly)
Jean: I'm going to miss you, ma chere. (kisses Dominique)
Dominique: (in a druken daze) Ja ! (laughs) I will too. But, don't worry, I'll return in one piece like I always have. I have a dozen angels guarding my ever step. You'll be with me in spirit as well.
Jean: I'll pray for you every night ! (kisses her again)
Dominique: You know, Jean...You make it very difficult for me to leave.
Jean: (cell phone beeps) Another case ? (in disbelief) I can't believe it ! (sighs, to himself) I hope I'm home in time to fix dinner for Christina. What am I thinking...She can make her own dinner. (to Dominique) Goodbye ! Take care !
Dominique: I will, don't worry. (waves goodbye to her hubby)
Scene 3—Plane To Sweden
Lupin III: Has everyone brought enough supplies to keep us alive ?
Fujiko: I did ! (opens up compact and puts on makeup) A woman must leave home with the essentials !
Carmen: (happily) I get to go on my first caper !
Arsene Lupin IV: Carmen, remember...you're playing with the big boys now so you gotta be careful. (pats his sister on the back) Besides, I'll be watching your back if any one tries to hurt you.
Carmen: (hugs her brother) You're a peach, Arsene !
Arsene: (blushes)
Jigen: (loading gun) I've got what's most precious to me in my pocket. (pulls out picture of Mary and June, looks at it, kisses it, and places the gun in that pocket with the picture.
Goemon: (looking at Goemon) He's rather sentimental today...isn't he ?
(They all laugh a little and enjoy the flight to Sweden)
Dominique: (hears her stomach growl) I hope we get there soon because I am famished !
Lupin III: Just a few more hours and we'll be there. I've got us booked at a nice restaurant in the countryside. I'm sure you'll like it.
Fujiko: Marvelous ! Then, we can go to sleep and start searching the country for the Nazi gold.
Lupin III: Bingo ! (smiles)
Scene 4—The Restaurant
(They plane touches down and Lupin III and the gang stop at the restaurant for a quick bite to eat. Zenigata, Bateau, Tochiro and Onsen are outside waiting for Marie's signal. Marie is incognito as a waitress. None of them suspect that Marie is in disguise because she is wearing a curly blonde wig that looks real.)
Marie: (on communicator) Zenigata ?
Zenigata: Yes ?
Marie: They're on their way in. When they leave, I'll give the signal...
Zenigata: What about you ? What are you going to do, just stand there and do nothing ?
Marie: No, father...You silly coot !
Zenigtata: How dare you speak to your father that way !
(The others are laughing hysterically)
Zenigata: SHUT UP !
(Silence)
Marie: I will follow from behind and pin Dominique. Then, you get the others.
Zenigata: (still a little angered by what his daughter said) Sure. Over and out.
(Lupin III and the others sit down. Dominique eyes the menu with anticipation. Soon, Marie comes to serve them, under the name "Claire".)
Marie: Are you ready to order ?
Jigen: (big smile) You bet !
Lupin III: Anytime, sweet-cakes !
Fujiko: (clears throat)
Lupin: Oh, (nervous laugh) sorry. I mean, (sweetly) "Claire".
Marie: (bowing) Thank you !
(They order, and the boys outside are playing gin rummy.)
Tochiro: (educated) I believe I have won once again.
Onsen: No fair ! You cheated !
Zenigata: (growls in disgust) I wish they would hurry up and eat. I don't have all day to wait for Wolf...(sighs, and then falls asleep)
Tochiro: The old man fell asleep again.
Onsen: Ah, crud...He always does this. (pause) Zenigata !
Zenigata: (shocked) Huh ? What did I miss ?
Onsen: Oh, (short sigh) nothing.
Tochiro: We're just making sure you stay awake. (pauses to get some black coffee from a canteen of his own, and pours a cup for Zenigata) Coffee ?
Zenigata: Why, thank you. (Takes a drink) Alright ! Now, I'm fired up ! Lemme at 'em ! Lemme at 'em !
Onsen: Calm down, Zen ! (hands on Zen's shoulders) Wolf's still eating...
Zenigata: (grumpy) Jeez, it takes him an awful long time to eat !
(Soon, Marie gives the signal that Lupin and the gang are done with their meal. Without any warning, Dominique is pinned down, losing her sword. "RUN !", she screams. Goemon is the first to hear her and runs ahead. )
Goemon: Better move it.
Jigen: Crap ! Zenigata's found us !
(Lupin, Jigen and Goemon are the only ones that get away.)
Scene 5—The Hotel
(Lupin notices his room is nice and tidy. All of the gang's stuff is in the room, neat, and organized. He is exhausted from running. Jigen sits on the same bed that Lupin does. Goemon sits on the floor, quietly mediating.)
Lupin: (sadly) They've got my boy and my wife !
Jigen: We'll get them back !
Goemon: They will pay for capturing a fellow samurai.
Lupin: We have a slight problem though ?
Jigen: (curiously) What's that ?
Lupin: (feeling stupid) I don't know where the stinking jail is !
Goemon: (groans)
Lupin: I know, I know ! It's terrible ! I've been here and there, but in Sweden...I know nothing.
Jigen: (patting Lupin on the back, assuredly) We all know that feeling.
Goemon: We're all at a loss here. (short pause) Zenigata's got us on this one.
Jigen: (hitting the bed with his fist) Zenigata ! (hits the bed again) Curse that rotten Zenigata !
Lupin: Guys, we need some time to think about this. Let's just take a rest...and see what tomorrow brings.
Goemon: Sleep replenishes the soul.
Jigen: Yeah. True.
(They all fall asleep, while Lupin figures out how to trick Zenigata...)
Scene 6—The Rescue !
(Lupin wakes up the next day, eats a complimentary breakfast in bed. The others join in, and Lupin discusses a brilliant plan...)
Lupin: Alright ! Now, you're probably wondering what my imagination has concocted overnight...Am I right ?
Jigen/Goemon: (unenthusiastically) Yes.
Lupin: Ok, I've got police outfits in my suitcase that we can change into for such a dilemma ! (throws them the suits)
Jigen: Ooo ! Not shabby !
(They quickly change into the outfits)
Goemon: This looks very tacky on a warrior, you know ?
Jigen: (laughs)
Lupin: Come on ! We don't have time to fool around. We've got people to rescue.
(They quickly head on the road via taxi, and are quickly taken to the jail, thanks to their costumes.)
Lupin: (whispering to Jigen and Goemon in the cab) It's working !
(The cabby drops them off.)
Cab Driver #1: (a northern Swedish accent) Here's your stop, officers.
Lupin: Thank you, kind Sir.
Jigen: Yeah, thanks !
Goemon: (bows a little)
Cab Driver #1: No problem ! Just doing my job ! (drives away)
Lupin: (giggles) Ooo ! We're close now !
(They walk right past the guards who let them in, not knowing who they really are. Lupin asks the warden where Fujiko, Dominique and Arsene are.)
Warden: (lilting Swedish accent) Follow me.
(Lupin, Jigen and Goemon follow the Warden. Dominique is in a cell playing "Since My Baby Left Me" on a harmonica. Fujiko is singing soulfully. Arsene is pretending to play bongo drums.)
Warden: Here they are. (pause)
Jigen: We would like to investigate the criminals for any stolen narcotics that they might've taken into your country.
Warden: Suits me. (Walks away)
Jigen: (triumphantly with a short laugh) Narcotic searches fool wardens almost all the time !
Goemon: You're just fortunate that warden fell for our disguises...
Dominique: (placing harmonica in pocket) Are you who I think you are ?
Lupin: Yes, indeed ! The one and the only !
Arsene: Father !
Fujiko: Get us out of here...I can't stand being locked up in closed areas...
Lupin/Jigen: Goemon, you do the honors.
Goemon: Delighted. (slashes at the iron bars and they fall to the ground, crumbling)
Arsene: (to Goemon as they all escape) You have got to teach me how to do that, Goemon !
(They all run away, and the alarms are sounded. Zenigata is in an office somewhere where he receives a call from the Warden.)
Scene 7—The Chase
Zenigata: WHAT ?! He got away ! (shakes head back and forth) I can't believe it !
(The next scene shows up by the last scene being "pushed" out of the way. We see Zenigata in a car, chasing Lupin and the gang who are now sandwiched in a taxi, and very uncomfortable at the moment )
Zenigata: The chase begins ! I am the hunter, and you, Lupin are the hunted !
Arsene: Man ! Dad, does that guy ever shut up ?
Lupin: (frankly) Nope.
Fujiko: We have to get moving, Cabby !
Cab Driver #2: (Southern Denmark accent, a female driver) I'm going ! I've never driven this fast before !
Lupin: Well, if you can't lady...Then, let me show you how. (climbs up into the front seat and she climbs into the back)
Cab Driver #2: (waves, nervously) H-Hey. How are you doing today ? Ha, ha. Nice weather we're having in Sweden, eh ?
Lupin: (steps on the gas)
Cab Driver #2: (screams) OH, MY !
Scene 8—Nazi Gold...How Are We Gonna Take This Home ?
(Fujiko looks back and sees that Zenigata is no longer in sight. On the way, Zenigata's car breaks down and Marie and the others have to fix it. There is a castle in the distance. Could this be where the so called "Nazi gold" is ?)
Lupin: (abruptly stopping, everyone in the car jerks) I think this is it !
Arsene/Carmen: Whiplash !
Cab Driver #2: (uncovering eyes) I-Is it over ?
Fujiko: (hand on Cab Driver's shoulder) It's over. But, we still need your cab, if you don't mind.
Cab Driver #2: (still a little overwhelmed) O-okay. (pause) I'll find my own way home.
Jigen: Wait ! (pause) Here's your fee !
Cab Driver #2: (blushing a little) Thank you, Sir. I really don't need this, since (pointing at Lupin) he did most of the driving. (Laughs) But, (bows) thank you ! (waves for a driver to pick her up, and she is picked up and taken home)
Dominique: She was very kind to let us borrow her car.
Goemon: Do you think she knew that...
All: (except Goemon who shakes his head right and left) Nah.
Arsene: She didn't know, she couldn't have known that we're thieves.
Fujiko: (looking at the huge castle) The gold must be in there ! (sly smile) I have a good feeling about it.
Lupin: (leading the way) Come on ! (pause) According to the legend, I think I know where the gold is located. (directing) Hurry !
(Fujiko and the rest of the gang follow Lupin into the basement of the castle where they find treasure chest upon treasure chest of Nazi gold...)
Carmen: (amazed) WOW !
Lupin: We can't possibly take all of this home.
(All of them are shocked except for Carmen and Arsene)
Arsene: Father's right. We have to leave some gold here, in memory of the Jews who lost their lives to the Nazis in World War II.
Carmen: (bowing, solemnly) May they rest in peace.
Jigen: (to Fujiko, being extremely serious, as usual) She's got a good point, Fuji !
Fujiko: (a little upset, but not too angered because he knows his children are right) Oh, alright ! Let's take what we've got and split !
(They run to the cab and Lupin floors it. On the way, they pass Zenigata. They all taunt him.)
Zenigata: Arrrrrgh ! (shakes fist in the air)
Marie: Give it up, dad ! They've gotten away again.
Zenigata: (hits car with fist) Piece of junk ! (kicks the car)
Onsen: (actually being "smart" for once) Why don't I just call the Towing Service and have our car towed !
Tochiro: Oh, why didn't you think of that in the first place, Onsen ?
Onsen: Because I'm not a moron who doesn't know how to fix cars !
Zenigata: (irate) Will you just slag off ?!
Onsen/Tochiro: (saluting) Yes, SIR !
Marie: (laughs)
Bateau: (to himself) I wanna go home...
Scene 9—Young Love
(The gang heads home on the airplane. On the way back, they watch an in- flight movie called "Sleepy Eyes Of Death".)
Dominique/Goemon: This movie is a classic ! (Goemon and Dominique look at each other and laugh. The rest of them laugh.)
(Plane touches down, and the gang goes home and Christina and playing Samurai Shodown 3 with Kunihiko. Dominique's House )
Christina: (pausing the game) Mom's home !
Kunihiko: (following Christina, quietly) Why is she lugging a treasure chest behind her ?
Christina: (whispering back) I thought I told you already, Kuni ! She's a thief.
Kunihiko: (dumbly) Oh. (nervous laugh) Sorry.
Dominique: (to her daughter) Who's your friend ?
Christina: This is Kunihiko Taeko.
Kunihiko: (bows) Pleasured to meet you, ma'am.
Jean-Luke: (walking in late) Sorry I'm late, everyone ! Today's case was a real bear.
Dominique: Jean, go ahead and take it easy, hon. You need some rest.
Jean: (quickly kissing Dominique) You are too good to me, dear.
Dominique: (laughing girlishly, she fixes dinner. From the kitchen, she calls her daughter.) Would Kunihiko like some dinner ?
Kunihiko: (smiling) Sure !
Christina: (embarrassed) Mother...You really shouldn't trouble yourself.
Dominique: (winks to her daughter, to herself) Ah, young love. Such a precious thing it is, I hope she can later become his wife...Seems like such a nice boy.
(Dominique makes dinner for the family)
Scene 10—Dinner
Dominique: Supper is ready !
Jean: (smelling the food) Smells delicious my dear ! You never cease to amaze me with your exquisite cooking !
(As we see family and friends chat and talk, we are taken to different houses where other families are eating, the Daisuke Family, The Lupin family and the Ishikawa family. In the background we can hear a familiar melody..."Everlasting Love" as sung by Gloria Estevan. Then we see "The End" written on the screen in cursive. Credits roll, Bloopers...)
Blooper #1...Coffee
Tochiro: Coffee ?
Zenigata: (taking coffee) Why thank you ! (Drinks coffee, pause) Alright ! Now I'm fired up ! Ok, lemme at 'em ! Lemme at 'em ! (laughs hysterically) Sorry, I can't help it...(laughs)
(the other actors and actresses laugh as well)
Director: (lowering head) Cut...
Blooper #2...Cab Driver #2
Jigen: Wait ! (pause) Here's your fee !
Cab Driver #2: (blushing) Thank you, you handsome stud you !
Jigen: Uh, I don't think that was in the script.
Cab Driver #2: Oops !
(The others are laughing out loud)
Director: CUT !
Blooper #3...The Lost "Plane" Scene
Lupin: (watching movie) "Sleepy Eyes of Death", eh ?
Fujiko: You've never seen this movie ?
Lupin: No. This would be the first time that I've seen it.
(All are shocked)
Goemon: You haven't lived until you've seen "Sleepy Eyes of Death".
Jigen: You're gonna love this movie.
Dominique: Yeah ! ()
(All start babbling about certain scenes that might give away the plot...)
Lupin: Would you guys pipe down, I'm tryin' to watch the movie !
All: (except Lupin) Sorry !
By: Elizabeth Berndt August 4, 1999