Serena wasn't exactly feeling in the Christmas mood when Henrik caught her in her office. She had managed to find out from Cameron which flight Bernie was taking back to Nairobi, and had been tracking that plane since it had taken off from London forty minutes ago. Still, she had put on a long-suffering smile when he held out a garment bag to her, a bemused smile on his lips. "I need to ask a favor of you. And I promise that there is not a sequined jumpsuit in here, I double checked before I picked it up at the dry cleaners. Elle is currently stuck in surgery, and so is unable to play Mrs Claus this year for Otter Ward. Would you mind stepping into her shoes?"
She let out a deep sigh as she glanced back at the computer screen. Bernie's plane was just crossing into southern France, and her heart clenched painfully as she turned her attention back to Henrik and nodded once. "I suppose that I can do that. After all, there's nothing for me to go home for tonight, is there?"
His brow furrowed a little as he hung the garment bag on the coat tree in the corner of the office before coming over to her side and resting his hand on her shoulder. "I understand all too well what it's like to go to an empty home at night. If you need someone to listen to you, my door is always open, I hope you know."
"Thank you, Henrik," she replied as she rested her hand atop his and took a deep breath. "I just have to learn to live with the mistakes I made, and hopefully not make them again." Her lower lip trembled dangerously, and he kindly averted his eyes, allowing her to get control of her emotions. She was grateful for the kindness, and she breathed in and out a few times as she blinked her eyes, trying to stave off the tears that came all too quickly since Jason's wedding day. "So, who's playing Santa? Connie?"
Henrik chuckled a little as he shook his head. "You're not the first person to ask that, though I imagine that Connie would give you a look before tearing you to shreds. You know that she cannot abide gossip." He gave her a knowing smile before shaking out his shoulders a little. "And I don't believe I'll tell you who is playing Santa. That deserves to be a welcome surprise for everyone."
A tiny part of her hoped that Bernie would somehow, magically, be wearing the red suit that would accompany her outfit, but the more practical part of her said that that was a pipe dream. They had said all that they had to say at Albie's, no matter how much she had wanted a chance to say all the things she had kept inside, wanting Bernie to be happy, to be free of her and the chaos she created. "All right, when do I need to get ready?"
"We need to be up on Otter in thirty minutes. That should give you enough time, yes?"
She nodded as she shrugged off his hand and stood up, reaching for the garment bag. "I'll be back here shortly," she replied, grabbing her purse as well, since she knew that she'd have to reapply her makeup before changing her clothes. Heading to the locker room, Serena locked the door behind her, quickly stripping off the clothes she had worn to work before squeezing into the costume. It was clear that it had been rented with Elle Gardner in mind, since the bodice was a little too tight, though the empire waistline of it allowed Serena to feel like she could move and breathe.
She shook her head as she looked at the wig and mob cap that completed the look, knowing that she would have to wear them to be Mrs Claus. Letting out a deep sigh, she pulled the wig over her hair and looked in the mirror to make certain that all of her hair was covered by the wig before affixing the mob cap over it. "All I need is a pair of glasses, and I'll look like a completely different person," she murmured as she tried to smile cheerily at her reflection. The children would expect a cheerful Mrs Claus, after all. Rummaging through her purse, she pulled out her small makeup bag and reapplied her lipstick before applying some blush with a little heavier hand than she normally used, since rosy cheeks couldn't be relegated to the man himself.
Finally, she decided that she was happy with her appearance, and she left her clothes in the garment bag before bustling from the room. Though she tried to get back to her office unnoticed, Donna managed to bump into her, a giggle slipping from her lips before she could stop it. "Looking good, Ms Campbell! Or should I say, Mrs Claus?"
"Don't. I'm doing this as a favour to Henrik, for the children. They, at least, can be cheered up with a small gesture of kindness." Donna clucked her tongue a little, and Serena shook her head. "Don't be kind, please, not now. I broke my own stupid heart by being nothing more than a silly slag, and the great love of my life is probably flying over the Mediterranean right now."
"We all make mistake, Ms Campbell. At least you didn't murder anyone?"
"There is that." She smiled tightly before looking over at her office, seeing Henrik open the door. "I really have to go now. Can't keep the children waiting." She brushed past Donna and went to Henrik, gesturing down her body with her hand, seeing him smile a little as he dipped his head. "All right, I suppose that I'm ready to play the sweet Mrs Claus."
"Then let's head up." He held out his elbow to her, and she slipped her hand into it, allowing him to take the lead as they went over to the lift. As they waited, she listened to him hum lowly, a sad, gentle, song that seemed to fit her mood perfectly. Unable to stop herself, she tightened her hold on his arm as she stepped closer to him, feeling close to tears once more. "You'll be fine in time, Serena."
"Will I? You aren't. We've both lost the loves of our life. Can you ever truly be fine after that?" She cut her words off before she said something that made her openly weep. Henrik lifted his other hand, patting her arm gently as they stepped inside the lift and rode up to the correct floor. The person playing Santa had his back turned to them as the lift doors slid open, and Serena tried to discern who it could be based on their height and body shape.
Henrik led her over to Santa before clearing his throat. As the person turned to face them, Serena let out a soft gasp as she smiled brightly. "Professor Hope!" she managed to squeak out before losing control of her emotions and bursting into tears.
"Henrik? This is not the welcome I was expecting," he said as he pulled Serena into a tight hug. "Shh, my dear, nothing is so bad as to warrant these tears, is it?"
Serena nodded a little as she felt him rub her back softly, allowing her to get control of herself once more. "I made a horrible mistake, and this is going to be an even more difficult holiday season. But I have to have a stiff upper lip, so that the children will have a good time. What are we doing, Henrik?"
"Last year, Santa read a story to the children while Mrs Claus handed out small gifts to the children. The nurses on the ward will help you make certain that the correct gift goes to the correct child. We could go down that route once again, or we could switch roles. Which would you prefer?"
"I think that I'd like to read the story, if you don't mind, Elliot. I can focus better on a book than the children. And I've been getting in good practice with the voices since Guinevere was born." He gave her a small nod, and Serena felt herself relax a little as they went over to the nurse's station. There was a large bag of presents there, and Elliot shouldered that as Fletch handed over an oversized book to Serena. "I didn't expect to see you up here, Fletch."
"Jac's bringing Emma and Theo, so I thought I'd be there for her, just in case something goes wrong."
She nodded a little as she patted his arm. "Well, I'm glad to see a friendly face." Serena gave him a small smile before following after Henrik and Elliot. Taking a deep breath, she plastered the happiest, fakest, smile on her lips that she could and then sailed into the room, listening to Henrik introduce them. The kids cheered and clapped as she took a seat in the rocking chair next to the tree. It was a little unnerving when all the eyes of the children focused on her, and she swallowed thickly, trying not to choke on the lump that seemed to have appeared in her throat. Still, she knew that the show had to go on, and she made herself comfortable as she opened the book and cleared her throat, starting to read the Christmas story Henrik had chosen for them.
There was something so melancholy about the story, even though she knew it would have a happy ending, and Serena found herself near tears by the time she reached the end. None of the children seemed to notice how quietly she closed the book, as they were far too excited by the prospect of presents as they swarmed Elliot. Clutching the book to her chest, Serena watched as the nurse playing elf helped him hand out the correct package to the right child, and the longing that clenched her heart so hard so fast caught her off guard, causing her to cry a little.
Serena lowered her head and closed her eyes to try and keep from crying too hard, as she didn't want to upset anyone. As she took a few deep breaths, she felt a warm hand close around her shoulder, squeezing lightly. Slowly, Serena lifted her head to look up into a familiar set of warm brown eyes. She thought she was seeing things, and so she slid her eyes closed once more, pasting on a patented false smile as she did so, knowing that she would get asked questions if she was seen to be crying. "I'm not a figment of your imagination, Serena."
"You have to be. I watched your plane flying over Southern France not forty minutes ago."
Serena could hear the person in her space move around, until her hands were on Serena's knees. "Look at me, please." She slid her eyes open, swallowing thickly when she saw that perhaps her eyes had not been betraying her. "I had made it all the way to the airport, hell, all the way to my gate, before I realized that we were both wrong, we were both too willing to give up before everything was said between us. I can see myself remaining wild and free whilst pushing Guinevere in a swing. And any grandchildren that Cam or Charlotte might give us. Connie is still willing to give me a position in the ED. We are going to make this work."
"But I'm not good enough for you. I don't deserve you, and I don't want to bring you down. You should be out there, having adventures, not stuck here in the mundane."
Serena's next words were swallowed by Bernie's lips as she leaned into her space and kissed her fiercely. "We're going to counseling, darling. We're going to learn how to do this couple thing, and be there for each other, and I don't think that I'll take no for an answer. There was a reason you caught the bouquet, Campbell."
She gave Bernie a shaky smile as she nodded. "I suppose that I could do that for us. As long as it's not anyone here at the hospital." Bernie nodded a little, and Serena let out a soft sigh as she stood up and shook out her skirt, reaching out her hand to tug Bernie to her feet. "I knew I had made a mistake the moment I saw you at the door. I just didn't want to seem desperate or take away from Jason's special day. And I want to be happier and healthier for you. It's coming up on two years since Elinor…"
"I know," Bernie whispered as she pulled Serena into a tight hug, letting her bury her face into the crook of her neck. "And I don't think that either of us have dealt with the resulting feelings. All I know is right now, right here, I want to hold you tightly for Christmas and face our New Year together. Do you think that Mrs Claus can put in a good word with Santa for me?"
Serena tittered as she nodded, pulling away from Bernie and taking hold of her hand as she started to make her way over to Fletch, Henrik, and Elliot. "You have to meet Santa, Bernie! He was a great friend of mine, back a few years ago." Bernie nodded a little as she scrunched up her face a little in confusion. "Elliot stepped in to play Santa for us this year, and I have no idea how Henrik managed to finagle this little Christmas miracle, but I'm glad that he did, since it seems to have let something loose in the universe, bringing us back together." Bernie squeezed her hand a little as she nodded, and then they came to a stop in the circle of men. "Santa, you managed to save the best gift for last, and gave it to me."
Elliot chuckled a little as he turned to them, tugging the hat off his head before stuffing it and his gloves into the pockets of his costume. "Serena, I didn't know…"
"You couldn't have, really. You were in Pakistan, after all. This is…"
"Berenice Wolfe. We've met, briefly."
Serena looked between the two of them, seeing the warm smile that spread across her partner's face as she extended her hand to him. "Professor Hope, yes! I didn't know you would be the Elliot that Serena was talking about."
He grinned as she shrugged a little. "It's all right. Henrik has invited myself, Jac, and Frieda out to lunch. Would you two like to join us?"
She decided to let Bernie take the lead here, since Serena didn't want to set everything at sixes and sevens again. Bernie tightened her hold on her hand as she nodded. "I think that it would be nice to catch up with you all. There's a lot that I missed out on my few days back." Serena let out a little sigh of pleasure as she stepped closer to Bernie, feeling more settled in that moment. "However, I put my foot down at Serena wearing that costume outside of the hospital."
"My feelings precisely, Ms Wolfe," Henrik said as he looked at Serena, cocking an eyebrow upwards as she gave him a small shrug. "The deposit on that was astronomical, so we'll meet at The Kingston Arms in twenty?"
"Sounds good to me, Henrik," Serena said as she headed for the door. "I'm sweating like a stuck pig in here, anyway." A soft chuckle slipped from her lips as she heard Henrik draw in a sharp breath through his nostrils, knowing that she had hit her mark, and Bernie shook her head as they headed towards the lifts.
"You shouldn't needle him so."
She looked up at Bernie, giving her a small wink as she pressed the down button. "He needs to have a little levity in his life. Remember, we talked a little about Roxanna and John dying? He's trying to find some equilibrium once more, and I know that by treating him normally, even teasing him a little, I can make things a little easier. Right?"
"I suppose. As long as you don't carry it too far."
Serena nodded as she stepped even closer to Bernie, wanting to just exist in her aura. "So, where are you going to stay? I, I don't think that we should just jump back into our routine, since we have to talk. But I'd love it if you spent the night Christmas Eve and Christmas Day."
"I'll be at Jason's, actually. He said that I would always have a place with him and Greta, if I changed my mind about leaving. This way, I'll be close to home, should you need me, but still far enough away where we can have our space to explore this new phase to our relationship," Bernie said as they stepped onto the lift. Serena pressed the button for their floor. "You need to wear velvet more often. I'm having a difficult time keeping my hands off of you right now."
"You're always free to touch," she purred, and Bernie laughed as she shook her head. "All right, too fast, I know. But I can't help flirt with you. You make it so easy for me to do." Bernie just reclined against the back of the lift, smiling at her a little, as she shook her head again, a little slower this time, and Serena hoped that this was the beginning of a stronger relationship for them.