Relena and Her Life
AN: Well this is a
Relena bashing fic for all you Relena haters!
And if you like Relena flame me or email me.
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing (which sucks). I also don't own Relena (thank god!)
A cat went
down the street and took a crap. Then
it went over to see it's best friend Relena Dorlian Peacecraft and took a crap
on her. Relena was happy to see her
furry little friend (AN: and no the furry little friend isn't her ass. It's the cat) again. Relena was usually very lonely, so her cat
gave her good company; especially when she did her daily stalk. She usually stalked Heero (her number one
love) and Dorothy (her number two love).
She liked Heero more so she stalked him more often. She loved Heero so much that she took
pictures of him everywhere he went (even when he went to the bathroom ~_~;;)
and put it on her neon pink bedroom
walls. She also loves the color
pink. She has her own special pink limo
and she even wanted her faithful servant Pegan to wear a pink suit and dye his
hair pink. Relena loves many things and
people but is unaware that people hate her.
She went to take a rest from her stalking. Stalking is very tiring and burns a lot of calories. She saw a picture on the fireplace of her
and her father. She started to feel sad
and tell him her feelings.
"Father I'm I foolish to love him?" she asked.
Then the ghost
of her father came out.
"Yes. You're a dumb
ass. The guy obviously doesn't like you
and you obsessed over him. And I can
see why he doesn't like you because if he did I would think he needs to go to a
mental institution. And then you ask
him to kill you. I can see why the
Peacecrafts ditched you."
"Thank you father. I
know he loves me."
"URG! You're so clueless!
Screw you, I'm going back in my coffin." The ghost of her dad said and
left.
"Alright. Farewell
then." She said over dramatically waving her hand.
Relena sat
there for I while thinking about what she did already during the day.
"Well, I think I did everything…. No wait, I have to do one
more thing to complete my day."
She open the
window and took a deep breath.
"HEEEERRRRROOOOOOO!!!!!!! COME BACK TO MEEEEEE!!!!!!"
When she was
doing her 'vocal exercises'. An old
lady and her dog happened to pass her by.
The dog was so stunned at the sudden ear tearing noise that it heeled
over and died. The old lady was in
shock herself.
"You stupid bitch!
You killed my dog and broke my eardrums!" the old lady yelled.
"Oh hi Mrs. Robinson!" Relena replied over happily.
"Stupid freak." Mrs. Robinson mumbled and walked off.
"Oh I better have one last check to see what my Heero is
doing."
She went over
to Heero's apartment and saw Heero and the rest of the G-Boys as well as Noin,
Zechs, Sally, Lady Une, Hilde, Catherine, and Dorothy. They happened to be discussing how do deal
with Relena at the time.
"I can't take it anymore!
She has to be killed. I can't
even take a piss without knowing that she's taking picutures!" Heero yelled.
"We have to kill her I'm so ashamed that she's even related
to me." Zechs said.
Everyone
nodded. Right on time Relena burst
through the door (literally).
"Hi everyone!! Can I join the party?"
"No." everyone said at the same time.
Then all of
then pulled out their guns at the same time and shot her. But it had no affect.
"What that's impossible!" Duo yelled.
"Wait I have an idea!" Wufei said.
"What is it?" they all asked.
"Well I was thinking of this bedtime story Sally was reading
to me because I couldn't go to sleep.
Well at the end this wicked witch got killed by pouring water on her and
she melted."
Everyone looked
at him weird. Duo started to crack up
and Sally started to blush.
"Sally reads you bed time stories!! HAHAHAH!"
"So…" Wufei said looking hurt.
"Well I think we should try it." Noin said.
"Yeah ok."
"That was fun! What
are we going to play next!" Relena said jumping up and down.
They all came
back with a bucket of water.
"Heero you do the honors." Trowa said.
"My pleasure."
Heero poured
the water on Relena and she melted.
"Well now I know why she smells like crap. Because she'll melt if she takes a shower."
Hilde said.
They'll nodded
and had a party.
*~*The End*~*
AN: Review and FLAME!
