A.N: this story is probably going to be a one shot unless my readers want more.
Disclaimer: I don't own Faith; she belongs to the creators of 'Buffy The Vampire Slayer' and the lyrics to the song "Better Than Me" belong to Hinder.
I think you can do much better than me, After all the lies that I made you believe.
I told you, so many times that I loved you, that I would be by your side until the day I die, I guess Mommy lied. I said I'd stay sober; I'd never drink when you were around, that was a lie too.
Guilt
kicks in and I start to see, the edge of the bed
where your
nightgown used to be.
I sit on the bed, where you use to sleep, always in your favorite 'Princess' nighty, you were my princess, so little and perfect always a smile on your face, the guilt kicks in baby, how could I abandon you?
I
told myself I won't miss you, but I remembered
what it feels like
beside you.
I was young and naïve, to think that a wouldn't miss my sweet baby, I told myself I could let you go, move on and forget, but I remember what it was like to have you beside me. A happy family.
I really miss your hair in my face, and the way your innocence tastes.
I miss you baby, the way we used to play, your hair in my face as we snuggled, the taste of you innocence, with every kiss goodnight. I really miss those kisses.
And I think you should know this, you deserve much better than me.
I left I know baby, but you should know, that you deserve a much better Mommy than me. Someone sober enough to never hit you.
While looking through your old box of notes, I found those pictures I took, that you were looking for.
I'm looking at all the notes you made for me, the ones that say "I love you Mommy", I love you to baby. I found those pictures I took, the ones you wanted to take to your new family, the ones of your third birthday party.
If there's one memory I don't want to lose, that time at the mall, you and me in the dressing room.
You used to love going shopping with Mommy, if there's one thing I never want to forget is the time, you and I went shopping for you fancy dress, how much fun we had playing in the dressing room.
I
told myself I won't miss you, But I remembered
what it feels like
beside you.
Mommy misses you baby, every moment of every day, I remember what it was like to be around your smiling face.
I really miss your hair in my face, and the way your innocence tastes.
You had such pretty hair, so soft and shiny, you loved to rub it over my face, you were so innocent, and I was so full of hate.
And I think you should know this, you deserve better than me.
Do you know, why I left, why I gave you to another Mommy, it was for the best, you deserved much better then me.
The bed I'm lying in is getting colder; Wish I never would've said it's over.
I miss you sweetie, I miss you crawling into my bed early in the morning, snuggling close to keep Mommy warm, well now the bed is so much colder without my snuggle bunny.
And
I can't pretend, I won't think about you when I'm older
You'll always be in my heart, no matter how old I get, I can't pretend I'll forget you, never gonna happen baby.
'Cause
we never really had our closure, this can't be the end.
This pain I feel since I left, it will never end, the emptiness that is my heart will always be, since we never got closure, you and I.
I really miss your hair in my face, and the way your innocence tastes.
I hope it's still there, you innocence and that gorgeous hair, oh how Mommy wishes she could kiss you. I miss you.
And I think you should know this, you deserve much better than me.
"I did what was best, for her, so why do I feel so empty?" Faith Lehane asked herself as she looked down at the photo of her and her Precious Ailee, she had left her, after discovering she was the slayer, she had been seventeen at the time, her daughter had been four.
Faith looked up as she heard a knock on the door, quickly shoving the photo away she called out "coming" as she walked towards the door.
The beautiful brunet, opened the door to reveal, a young teen around the age of thirteen, she had olive skin, and long brown locks, her eyes a beautiful ebony colour.
"Hi Mommy" the teen whispered when she saw Faith. A single tear ran down Faith's right check as she set eyes on her "Ailee".
A.N: please review and tell me what you thought.
