Note: This is just a piece of nonsense I wrote awhile ago for a first sentence challenge at tf.n.
The Storyteller
"Once upon a time there were four little Rabbits, and their names were - Flopsy, Mopsy, Cotton-tail, and Peter."
Parties on either side of the negotiations table turned and stared at Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn.
On one side the angry yellow faces of the Tabarru scowled menacingly, across the table the sour green faces of their adversaries, the Tabarrine glared resentfully. Though genetically separated by only a few generations, the species seemed to have little common ground, save the Tabar, the language they both spoke. Outside of their species there were few who understood it, to humans it was little more than a monotone hum. Unless of course they were angry, then it became an unpleasantly high pitched screech.
The room buzzed with a low hum, that still sounded angry to Qui-Gon's inexperienced ear, but at least the screeching that had gone on all morning had stopped.
Good, Qui-Gon thought, they had finally decided to listen. He decided to press the point now that he had their attention.
"And while these are real differences that will require difficult concessions from you both, you must not lose sight of that which binds you together, your common origins and shared desire for peace."
The round reflective eyes in the shining silver face of the protocol droid gave it an uncertain look as it cocked its head and listened intently to Qui-Gon's words.
Qui-Gon preferred not to use a droid for interpretation, but there were times it was necessary. He thought this one had a particularly soothing voice.
After what seemed a very long time taken to process his remarks into the obscure language, the droid hummed, "They lived with their Mother in a sand-bank, underneath the root of a very big fir-tree. 'Now, my dears,' said old Mrs. Rabbit one morning, 'you may go into the fields or down the lane, but don't go into Mr. McGregor's garden: your Father had an accident there; he was put in a pie by Mrs. McGregor.'"
Qui-Gon listened carefully as the droid translated, but he could not pick out any words, it sounded more like someone humming a pleasant tune.
By the time the droid finished, the room had gone completely silent, no screeching, no angry drone, not even the slightest hum. One or two of the Tabarrine exchanged glances with each other before casting furtive looks at their antagonists across the table. A few grunts, several Tabarru jerked their heads toward the Jedi, many on both sides nodded in agreement. At last there seemed to be some real communication.
Through the Force, Qui-Gon sensed a lessening in hostility, replaced oddly enough by feelings of confusion. Well, uncertainty was to be expected, working together was a new experience for both sides.
"Master." His young apprentice, Obi-Wan Kenobi, had just entered the room behind him.
Qui-Gon held up a hand to silence his padawan. His feelings told him that there had been a critical breakthrough in the negotiations, but that the moment could be easily lost.
"But Master…"
At seventeen years of age it was rare that Qui-Gon needed to admonish his padawan. All it took was a look.
Obi-Wan clapped his mouth shut, his face flushed slightly at the reproach, but he made no further attempts to speak.
Qui-Gon turned his attention back to the negotiations table. Now they were all blatantly ignoring him. There was a constant hum, a few exchanges back and forth across the table, and both sides seemed to be avoiding eye contact with the Jedi master. After a few moments, several of the leaders from both sides got up and walked together to the far corner of the room, where they huddled together in earnest discussion.
Excellent, Qui-Gon observed. There was little to do but wait.
He turned and looked at Obi-Wan, whose face was now a blank of Jedi inscrutability.
He raised an eyebrow questioningly and invited his padawan to speak. "You wished to tell me something, Obi-Wan?"
Obi-Wan bowed his head. "I apologize, Master, for the interruption. But there was something important I thought you should know. Apparently there was a mix-up when our ship was being loaded, the protocol droid we were assigned for this mission was left behind at the temple."
Qui-Gon's brows furrowed slightly, "Curious. However, this droid seems adequate. I am sure there is no cause for concern."
"According to the data specifications listed in the ship's inventory, this one is fluent in over 10,000 languages, including the Tabar, but it was to be sent to the day nursery here, it is programmed to tell stories to children."
Obi-Wan eyed the shining silver droid critically, causing it to look back and forth between the two Jedi nervously, "It was never programmed to be used for protocol or treaty negotiations. It could have easily caused an interplanetary incident."
Qui-Gon thought his apprentice was being overly cautious as usual, "Padawan, as Jedi we must work with what tools we have. You will not always have a protocol droid to interpret for you or to explain local custom, you must learn to rely on your feelings."
Obi-Wan still looked rather doubtful. Qui-Gon found it slightly amusing, "Trust me, Obi-Wan, my feelings tell me this droid will do fine."
Obi-Wan sighed, perhaps his master was right. He was on occasion. And it did seem as though the group in the corner had reached some kind of consensus, as shown by the Tabar custom of pressing noses together.
Minutes later, a representative from the group stepped forward somewhat nervously and bowed to the Jedi. Obi-Wan and his master bowed in return. The squat green Tabarrine hummed a short, rather uneven little melody then quickly stepped back away from the Jedi.
The Jedi turned expectantly toward the droid, it paused for a moment, raised its silver hands palms up, tilted its head to one side and began, "There was once a velveteen rabbit, and in the beginning he was really splendid."
Qui-Gon blinked once, "Excuse me?"
"Oh dear, I am so sorry." The droid was rather flustered now. "You are absolutely right, another rabbit story just won't do, oh dear me no, but perhaps a nice little story about a bear, albeit a rather silly old bear."
"Now where was I, oh yes…Here is Edward Bear, coming downstairs now, bump, bump, bump, on the back of his head, behind Christopher Robin. It is, as far as he knows, the only way of coming downstairs, but sometimes he feels that there really is another way, if only he could stop bumping for a moment and think of it."
Obi-Wan sounded like he might be choking on something, but his master apparently had no intention of saving him, he didn't even turn to look at his apprentice.
"Obi-Wan, please see to it that this droid is delivered to its intended destination."
It was a moment before Obi-Wan had recovered enough to speak without laughing, even still his voice shook a little, "But what about trusting your feelings, Master?"
"Obi-Wan."
The young Jedi wisely decided he had better take this opportunity to escape before he really got in trouble. "Well if you're sure you won't be needing it."
"Quite sure."
"Come along then 4E-LR, let's get you to your new job." Obi-Wan took the droid by the arm, but it dithered uncertainly.
"But master Jedi sir, I haven't finished telling my story and it really is one of my best."
"You can tell it to me on the way, or better yet, do you know the one, If You Give a Wookiee a Cookie?"
The End (thank goodness)
My apologies to Beatrix Potter, Margery Williams and A. A. Milne