Enough

by evalanis

Sirius finally - almost - tells Remus the words he wants to hear. Remus tries to convince himself that it's enough. Very short story. Between GoF and OotP.

Setting: Takes place between GoF and OotP. Mostly just me playing around with destroying my favourite boys… Poor things.

Disclaimer: Obviously the characters I not mine. I could never bring myself to write about them if they were. :D

Enough.

"I never loved you," the words broke into the silence, quietly, unexpectedly and forced Remus to take a breath, to swallow the lump which had suddenly appeared in his throat. "I never loved you. I think I was incapable of it. Probably still am." This last was followed by a bitter chuckle and Remus looked at Sirius uncertainly, wondering what was going on inside that beautiful head. He still had not looked up from where his eyes had focused on the hands folded in his lap."But I think," Sirius paused again, as if to gather his courage, and looked across the room at Remus, silver eyes bearing into him. "I think that if I was ever to have fallen in love with someone, it would have been you."

Remus quickly looked away, desperate that Sirius should not see the pleasure that he knew must show in his eyes, nor the pain that had lay hidden for so many years, only to be brought forward by Sirius's words. He had waited so very long to hear that Sirius loved him. So very long that this almost-proclamation caused his heart to pound excitedly within his chest. It's enough, he thought to himself as he quickly gathered his emotions. It's more than you ever planned on getting, you greedy bastard. It's enough.

Forcing himself to believe his own thoughts, Remus looked back at where Sirius sat, fidgeting nervously in his seat. Remus's heart turned over at the uncertain expression on Sirius's face, recognising how much strength it must have taken for him to admit the truth. It wouldn't have been easy to admit that you'd never loved the man you had shared your youth with, especially knowing how much he had loved you. So Remus took pity on the other man, determined to hold Sirius's words in his heart and his mind, where he could keep them safe.

"Now, would you like some more tea and cake?" He asked as he rose to his feet. "Or is some fire-whiskey more to your tastes this evening?" The pain in his heart as he nonchalantly swept aside Sirius's almost-proclamation of love was immense, but the look of relief and gratitude on Sirius's face at his words was more than worth it. It's enough.