Author: Katowisp/K. Firefly

Disclaimers: Still not mine.

Beyond the Wasteland

Hakkai and Gojyo stood vigil of a sort, keeping Goku company through his fevered days of unconscious. They wondered how much he would remember—would he have a clear memory, or be oblivious as usual? They deliberated over how to break it to him that Sanzo was gone.

"Left him." Gojyo grumbled, slapping a pair of threes down. They'd played poker until they had gotten bored (tired of losing, but Gojyo wouldn't admit that.)

"Shock, I think. Goku maybe means more to him than he thought."

Gojyo snorted.

When they got hungry, Hakkai usually offered to get food and then Gojyo would stand watch. It was eerie how little Goku moved. "He's in a coma." Hakkai was convinced. And they wondered if he would awake at all. He had nearly died, how would his body react returning to this state? His other half had saved him, and then what?

"Maybe they're at war." Gojyo mused over morning coffee. Hakkai poked at his pickled vegetables and grimaced.

"How do you mean?"

"I mean Seiten Taisei was out long enough, maybe he's fighting to overcome that limiter. No more Goku then, huh?"

"Hmm." Hakkai said noncommittally, eyeing their sleeping companion. "Don't underestimate our Goku."

On the evening of the second day, there was a windstorm and the sand whipped up from the desert blew into every crevice of the town. Hakkai kept a washcloth near so he could wipe the fine sand particles from Goku's face. He was mindful of the crud around his eyes, and he worried about his breathing, so he and Gojyo fashioned a facemask. Task completed, they settled down for a game of Gin Rummy.

"Five hundred years old, imprisoned in a mountain and host to the most terrifying creature I've ever laid eyes on. Does that make sense to you?" Gojyo asked, cigarette dangling from his mouth. Hakkai's eyes flickered momentarily to the cigarette in disapproval before he laid down another two cards. "I mean it's no wonder they wanted him gone, up there in heaven, yanno? But why take his memories?"

"I don't suppose anyone could remain sane if all they had for five hundred years were just their memories to keep them company." Hakkai said, pouring himself a cup of tea.

"I would think nobody could remain sane at all locked up for five hundred years, regardless of whether or not they had memories."

"Ah, yes, but Goku's a special breed. I suppose he was more earth than living child during that time. And to the earth, five hundreds years isn't a long time.Taking his memories was a rare kindness." Hakkai held his cards close and considered Goku for a long moment. "The earth dreaming it could be a boy." He mused quietly.

"But what about that creature? What about Seiten Taisei?" Gojyo asked, throwing his cards down in disgust as he lost another hand. He leaned back in his chair, the wood creaking under his weight.

"I don't think his memories have been erased." Hakkai replied. "I don't think he's able to come to terms with them, though." Hakkai paused. "And he has had no Sanzo to break him free. With only memories to keep him company, Seiten Taisei is probably insane."

"Maybe Goku's insanity?" Gojyo laughed, snubbing the butt of his cigarette in the provided trey. "What do you do for fun, anyway, for five hundred years?"

"I imagine you come up with games to play. If you're ever truly curious, you could ask Goku. I am sure he wouldn't mind. He might even answer, in his own way. He's grown up a lot—maybe he's come to terms with it."

"Naw. I don't think anybody could do that."

"No, I don't suppose they could." Hakkai sighed. His eyes flickered to the comatose boy and he looked at him thoughtfully while Gojyo considered his next hand. "I wonder…" He said.

"What's that?"

"Goku once told me how lucky he was Sanzo came to him. He said Sanzo complained of a voice in his head that wouldn't leave him alone, but Goku hadn't been calling. He'd given up years ago."

"So?"

"I wonder if it'd been Seiten Taisei."

"Eh?" Gojyo asked. He made a face. "I don't think that monster would—"

"His personality is childlike in many ways. Whoever put that diadem on Goku must've done it when he was very young. And while our Goku has matured and aged, that other Goku hasn't. Even if he's a violent monster when we see him, maybe there's a part of him that's just as lonely as our Goku."

"You think?" Gojyo asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"But then again," Hakkai sighed, "Who are we to speculate? What I wouldn't give for ten minutes with Bodhisattva Kanzeon. I suspect there's a lot more going on with Goku then even Sanzo knows."

"You're starting to think too much, Hakkai. And that's dangerous." Gojyo stood and stretched. "How's your wound?"

Hakkai gingerly touched his side and smiled wanly. "Been better. But it's healing all right. I can understand Goku's fear better now, about losing control." Hakkai fell silent, his eyes distant. He had lost control, and had nearly killed Goku in the process. Had Gojyo not pulled him off, he would have probably have injured him to the point that not even the earth could resurrect him.

"I'm going to go get a drink." Gojyo said, shifting his weight and reaching for another smoke. "Been cooped up too long with this crazy monkey of ours."

Hakkai stared at the closed door for a while, puzzling over the expression Gojyo had had on his face when he'd brought Hakkai back to life. That was twice now and Hakkai wondered if he'd make it back a third time. He moved to Goku's side, gently feeling his forehead and laying a damp cloth across his brow to try and bring down the fever. He wondered, also, if one day the stress of the two personalities would finally break Goku's body permanently.

Goku's fever broke around three that morning, and although he was just as motionless as before, Hakkai knew they would not have to wait for long before Goku awoke. If it was true that they were battling for control, then Goku had won again and would soon be back with them. Hakkai felt a weigh lift from his shoulders, and he fell into a light, easy sleep beside the boy. Gojyo returned a few hours letter, far less drunk than one would have expected after three hours of drinking. He shook Hakkai's shoulder gently.

"Time for sleep. You're not all healed either. The last thing we need is you to collapse in the middle of a desert somewhere."

"Goku is going to be okay." Hakkai said, allowing himself to be coaxed into the other bed. He peeked a green eye up at Gojyo. "We don't have to worry." And he was asleep within moment. Gojyo sighed, filling the chair that Hakkai had just vacated.

"It isn't him that I'm worried about, idiot." Gojyo muttered before resting his head in his hands, rubbing his eyes.

End

Total thanks to my editor, Pip. She caught everything, and any further mistakes are my own fault!

I hope you enjoy this little interlude for Hakkai and Gojyo. I am still writing Saiyuki, never fear! I actually just finished ten weeks of officer training school for the Marine Corps and am about to go back in for six months of officer training. I don't know how much I will be able to write, but I will be getting the next chapter of A Thousand Deaths out—probably before the end of the month. As always, if you are interested in unfinished bits and my thoughts on things, check out my writing journal at http://katowisp.