Shattered
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Drabble for actualodinson's 30 Day Dark Fandom OTP challenge
Day 6: 10/6/14
Prompt: Negative emotion (B). (Sadness, missing someone, helplessness.)
Summary: "I don't hate you. I hate what you have become." He walked away, not even looking back as I fell apart, broken. I never saw the tear that fell from his eyes as he walked away. He never knew how much he killed me inside. AkaKuro
...
It was a simple question. "Tetsuya, do you hate me?" I waited patiently for a reply. I watched as the light blue haired male pause in his walk beside me, pale lips pursing in thought for naught but a moment. His eyes, it reminds me of the sky, grew colder for some reason. He replied not with his usual monotone voice, but one that was decidedly harsh and unforgiving.
"I don't hate you. I hate what you have become." He walked away, not even looking back as I fell apart, broken. I never saw the tear that fell from his eyes as he walked away. He never knew how much he killed me inside. It was all for him, and he hated me for it.
…
10 Years Ago… Childhood
"Come on, Tetsuya! Over here!" a young red haired child said, grasping a small powder blue haired child's hand tightly as he tried to scramble up a small incline. "It's right there!" Pulling on the other child's hand, he fell backwards, the blue haired child toppling over onto him. Giggling, he smiled.
"Sei-kun, what did you want me to see?" Moving off of the redhead, the blue haired child plopped down next to him, looking up at the night sky. It was a festival, the both of them were dressed up in their kimonos, all dolled up for the ceremonies. It was by chance that their parents had sent them off to play in the park while they talked business.
"Look!" Pointing up at the stars, the redhead traced the path of a falling star. "Let's make a wish!"
"Yeah!" the blue haired child said, squeezing his light blue eyes tightly. The redhead chuckled, leaning over to place a small peck on the other's lips. Blue eyes flew open, widening as he blushed a cherry red. "Sei-kun~ what was that for?" The redhead smiled mischievously.
"So that I know for sure what my wish is!" The darkness hid the light pink tint to his own cheeks at his actions.
"So what is your wish?" The blue haired child pouted at the lack of response. All he got was 'Hi-Mi-Tsu.' Turning back up to look at the sky, he didn't see the adoring look sent his way by the redhead.
I wish that you will love me as much as I love you.
...
3 Years Ago… 1st Year at Teiko Chu Gakkou
Entering Teiko Chu Gakkou, a pair of crimson eyes caught another pair of light sky blue eyes. The latter showed no sign of recognition, even when the owner of the crimson eyes' heart leapt into his throat. It has been years since they had last meant, an unexpected moved by the other's family had them end up in completely different districts. Now, the redhead could see him again. Nothing has changed, really, he thought fondly, watching as the blue haired student turned away, face tucked into a book as he casually avoided the other mingling students, being avoided in return as if he was a phantom. Making his way towards him, the redhead reached out to tap him on the shoulder.
"Hajimemashite, Akashi Seijuuro desu. Douzo yoroshiku." Bowing politely to the male, he waited for a sign that he remembered.
"Hajimemashite, Kuroko Tetsuya desu. Douzo yoroshiku. Sumimasen," bowing back, the blue haired student excused himself, leaving the redhead to stand alone in a crowded hall. The redhead could hear a small crash somewhere in the background, like breaking glass. He didn't realize until later that it was his heart.
…
1 Year Ago… 2nd Year at Teiko Chu Gakkou
"Seijuuro."
"Hai, otou-sama," the redhead said, looking up from his shogi board, his hand in the process of moving a piece. He was playing against himself as usual. A pair of crimson eyes could be seen, mirroring that of his fathers, even if the elder has a head of black hair instead of the distinctive blood red of his son's.
"Only one who demonstrates excellence in both academics and sports… no, in all areas, can be considered a member of the Akashi household." The cold tone it was delivered in sent a shiver down the redhead's spine. "I have watched tapes of your previous matches. They are unacceptable. You have grown close to Kuroko Kenshou's son, Kuroko Tetsuya, I believe?"
"…yes, otou-sama." The redhead dreaded the rest of his father's speech. The way the dark red eyes, similar to that of the red imported wine his father favors, glinted boded ill will.
"Failure…of any kind, will result in the termination of Kenshou's contract with the Akashi Corporation."
"I understand, otou-sama." Bowing his head in deference bitterly, the redhead waited until he heard the fading sounds of feet disappear. He let out a small choking sound. He did his best to stay away from Tetsuya, yet this still happened. He tried to stay distant, honest, but when he saw the male struggling in basketball, so determined to make the team, he put a word in with Nijimura-senpai and dedicated his time to researching for a basketball style that will fit the small teen.
When Tetsuya made the team, it was evident that they would spend more time together, but even then he made sure to stay away from the 'light and shadow' duo. He couldn't handle the heartbreak a second time if he allowed himself to get close when it seems that the phantom player had gotten close to the tanned male.
This year, he had no choice. Daiki had drifted away and it left a void. Akashi couldn't handle leaving Tetsuya alone, so more interaction was a result.
'And word still got back to my father,' Akashi bitterly thought. 'I was so desperate to be close yet not to Tetsuya, and now I'll be the cause of his father's unemployment and his family's fall to poverty.'
It wasn't common knowledge, but Kuroko Hanako had died when Tetsuya was six, prompting the Kuroko family's move out of their old house and to a new district, the memories to sad to stay. It was only Tetsuya and his father, the latter working all hours to provide for his son, but even then it was rough.
No, he can't let that happen. Not to Tetsuya, no, never to him.
'I'll be victorious. Winning is everything. The victors writes history. The losers are wiped from it. I can't let that happen. I will not be wiped from history, and neither will Tetsuya. I… I am absolute. Nothing will stand in my way.'
…
It…it was all useless. I felt like crying, but my tears have long since dried up. Clenching my fist, I restrained myself from rushing after Tetsuya and forcing answers out of him. Nothing would change even if I do so.
Nothing I have done has ever been good enough.
Mother left me. Father despises me. The person I love hates who I am.
I'm nothing but a failure.
Absolute? I'm just lying to myself. Delusional beliefs that I recite constantly so that one day it might be true, but it never will me. Because nothing I do is ever right to the people that matter the most.
And in the background, I can hear the shattering of glass, the shattering of my heart.
…
I grew cold. I began to lock away all of the useless emotions. There's no purpose in life anymore. Basketball is now nothing but a chore and victory a mission. I enter Rakuzan, my father's alma mater. I became the best in academics and sports.
Tetsuya opened my heart again, slowly awakening the passion I once thought I lost. I forgot about my vow to remain cold and detached. I began to lose myself in the rhythm of basketball.
And then I lost.
And Tetsuya's with the American redhead, smiling and happy. Something he never was with me ever since I met him again all those years ago at Teiko.
And I wonder, where did it all go wrong?
Those haunting words…they still plague me…
"I hate what you have become."
...
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6/30 Days done~
-SilverReplay.