Hi everyone, *Some of you may have already read this A/N from my other story Mirrors, so just bear with me:)* I've decided to write another fanfic! This will be a lot different from my first one, well, for Rin and Len's relationship anyway! This is a darker and more sensitive fanfic and will mention self-harm and suicidal thoughts and other things like that. Depression is a really serious issue and it is a terrible thing to have to go through, and it is awful to have to watch someone go through it. Feeling that way is not something anyone should ever have to go through, but unfortunately it does happen. Sorry for my rambling, but this is an important issue to me.

Another thing about this story is that the backstory of some characters are terrible: sexual abuse, emotional abuse, bullying, etc. are some of the things that have happened/are happening to characters in this story. All of these things are terrible and hard to talk about, but I am making this story pretty real. For everyone's sake, most of it won't go too into detail.

The entire story won't be sad, there will be a mixture of sad and funny and happy parts! And to be honest, I will probably cry and laugh and have a mixture of emotions while writing this. When I write, I really feel for the characters; it's really bad when I can relate to them because I can get really emotional! But I think because I can relate, that will make the story better and a lot more real.

Sorry if the characters are kind of OOC, but I'm doing the best I can!:) Also, this is kind of an intro to the rest of the story, so this will be broken up into parts!

Chapter 1 (Pt. 1)

"Rin," she heard her father's voice from the kitchen.

"Yes daddy?" she said sweetly.

"Could you come here?" he asked. She smiled, wondering what her father wanted. Maybe he was going to take her somewhere! She got to her feet and walked towards the kitchen quickly. "C'mere princess," he smiled at her. Rin was seven at the time; she walked up to him and he picked her up and put him on her lap.

She felt something weird in his pants, but dismissed it and looked up at him, "Daddy, why did you need me?" she asked.

He stayed silent as he hugged her tightly, "You know I love you, right Rin?"

"Of course daddy," she said. That's when she felt his hand move up her thigh, "D-Daddy?" she said, sounding a tad bit confused, she didn't know what he was doing.

"I miss your mother very much, you know?" he said as his hand inched closer to the opening of her skirt. Rin's mother had died two months ago, and her father had been acting odd ever since.

Rin didn't know any better at the time, but she did know that she didn't like it. "Daddy, please stop," she cried softly. But he didn't. That was the first time her dad had ever done something like that to her. She didn't know why he put his hand up her skirt, but she wished that he hadn't.

"Rin, don't tell anyone about this." He gave a strange look, "This'll be our little secret."

She nodded and he put her down. Rin went back to her toys, but she couldn't play right. She couldn't stop thinking about what her father did. But she knew if she told anyone she'd get in trouble, so she kept her mouth shut.

Lily walked in and smiled at her sister, "Hey Rinny, whatcha playing with?"

"Diva Starz," she said, her face was blank and her voice was shaky.

"Are you alright?"

Rin shook it off and tried to act normal so her sister didn't ask questions, "Yeah! Sorry, I was just thinking!" she smiled, "My dolls Alexa and Miranda are baking cookies! Do you wanna play?"

Lily smiled and ruffled up Rin's hair, "I'd love to, but I've gotta go to swim practice."

Rin freaked out in her head, she didn't want to be left alone with her dad, "Can I come?" she smiled as normal as possible.

"Let me check with dad," she smiled and walked into the kitchen, "Can Rin come with me to practice?"

"Of course she can," he told her. Lily winked at her little sister and went back into her room.

Her father walked out and gave Rin a strange look, "Don't you dare tell," he whispered.

"I won't daddy," she said quietly and waited for Lily to return.

Rin jolted awake, breathing very heavily. She hated having those nightmares. She was lying in bed, now wide awake, and she decided she should get up since she probably couldn't get back to sleep, but she couldn't; her legs refused to move. She glanced up at the clock: 6:37 a.m., surely her sister should be awake by now. "Lily," she said just loud enough so that her sister could hear her. Rin lived with her sister in a small apartment near the middle school.

Lily arrived quickly and smiled at Rin, "Yeah sis?" She looked at Rin's completely pale and terrified face and her eyes widened, "Oh my gosh, what's wrong!?"

"I-I had a dream, a-about dad…" she cried softly.

Lily sat next to Rin and hugged her, "I'm so sorry, what was it this time?"

Rin bit her lip, she had never told Lily about the first time. She decided to suck it up and tell her sister about what had happened, and both of them were in tears by the end. "I was only seven years old," she sobbed into her sister's shoulder. Once she calmed down, she attempted to try and get out of bed, but her body didn't want to, "I can't get up," she said helplessly.

Lily got up and sighed, she felt so awful for her sister. Night after night Rin would have awful nightmares about their "father" and what he did to her. Lily wished that he had done it to her instead, so then Rin wouldn't have to be the way she was. She hated seeing her like this, it was so painful to watch. "Maybe you should try and go back to sleep?" she ran her fingers through Rin's soft blond hair.

"Will you stay with me?" she asked, her eyes were still red from crying. Lily nodded and laid down next to her sister, "I'm sorry I'm like this," Rin sighed.

Lily shook her head, "Don't say that, you're gonna get through this!" she said optimistically.

Rin couldn't bring herself to smile, she never could after having those nightmares, but she just grabbed her sister's hand and said, "No… I don't think I will." She turned away from Lily and tried to go back to sleep.

She didn't like hearing her say things like that, it was scary. "You don't have to go back to school, Rin. I can still homeschool you, and you can be away from everyone!" She didn't want her little sister to get hurt, she knew there were cruel people in the world. After what happened to that boy in Rin's sixth grade class, Lily shuddered, she didn't want that to happen to Rin.

Rin was silent for a few seconds, but then she answered, "No, I have to try. It's been five months, my therapist said he thinks I'm ready, so the least I could do is try." Especially so he gets off my back and I can stop stressing you out,Rin thought to herself. She didn't like the way she was, or that her sister had to take care of her, but she couldn't help it.

Lily hugged her, she was so proud of her, "That's my girl. But if you are going to school today, we probably need to get up and going, it starts at 8:30, remember?"

Rin groaned, "I forgot it started so early." Lily's face dropped slightly, so Rin took a breath and perked up the best she could, "But that's okay! I'm sure it'll be a decent day," she faked a smile.

Lily could tell she was faking, but was proud of her effort and decided to let her get away with it, "Okay sweetheart, let's get ready for your first day of eighth grade, I'll call the school and get everything figured out," she smiled and got out of bed. She looked back at Rin, who was able to get to the edge of the bed, and then she got up slowly. That was the first time she'd seen her get up so fast, yes it was slow to most people, but for Rin that was pretty fast, especially considering she'd had one of her nightmares. "I'm going to call, and then take a shower, do you need anything before I go?"

Rin shook her head, "I'm good, Lily," she said and walked to her closet. Lily nodded and left the room to call the school. Rin looked at all of her clothes, she wasn't used to wearing anything other than a tee shirt, a hoodie, and sweatpants. She decided on a white and orange striped shirt Lily had gotten her over the summer, and put on some random jeans; they were looser than she remembered, "Did I lose weight?" she was confused, she thought she had been eating properly, and she hadn't thrown up for a while, and she'd been getting out of bed, so why weren't her jeans fitting? "Just more problems in this terrible life of mine…" she sighed to herself, and then thought for a moment; why were her jeans not fitting such a big deal, why did they make her life worse? "Oh shut up Rin, don't over exaggerate. You're just making excuses, you are going to school and it will be great!" she tried to calm herself down, and, thankfully, it worked this time.

Lily came in the room smiling, "We got everything figured out, we'll go in a little early and get your schedule made up and I have to fill out a few forms and you should be good," she smiled warmly, she was so happy that Rin was actually trying.

"Okay," she smiled slightly, "Do you have a belt I can borrow? My jeans are too big."

Lily sighed, "I thought you were eating again…"

"I am!" she said quickly, "I eat at least two meals a day!"

She nodded, "We'll go shopping for more jeans later on today if you feel up to it," she put a hand on Rin's shoulder and smiled, "I love you Rinny, I'll get your belt and then take a quick shower!" It was already seven and she still had to shower and get her hair and makeup done because there was no way in hell that she'd go out in public looking like a hot mess. She ran into her room, grabbed a belt, ran back, threw it at Rin, and then ran to the bathroom.

Rin laughed at her sister's craziness, which surprised her, she didn't have to force herself to laugh; maybe, just maybe, this was going to be a good day. She put on the belt and looked at herself in the mirror, she looked tired, but when didn't she look tired? She decided she looked pretty good, so she went to the bathroom to brush her teeth, fix her hair, and put on some mascara. As she was putting in her big white bow, the shower stopped and Lily stepped out, not realizing Rin was in the bathroom. Rin and Lily both shrieked, Rin covered her eyes and Lily pulled the shower curtain back, "I'm so sorry," Rin said through her laughter, "I thought you knew I was in here!"

Lily started giggling as well, "Glad to hear you're in a giggly mood! Can you give me my towel?" she stuck out her hand. Rin, who was still laughing, handed Lily her towel and continued tying her bow. "Thank you!" she said, she wrapped the towel around her and got out of the shower, "Sorry you had to see that!" she blushed.

Rin smiled at her, "I should have told you I was in here, it was my fault! I'm sorry," she told her, and then added, "I hope I look as good as you do when I'm your age."

Lily grinned, Rin was so sweet, "I'm sure you'll look way better!"

She shook her head, "No, you're pretty and I'm not," she shrugged.

Lily gave her a scolding look, "Rinny! What have I told you about putting yourself down? You are a beautiful young lady and you will continue to get more beautiful as you mature!"

"B-But d-dad—"

Lily cut her off, "That does not make you any less beautiful… Rin, you just have to believe in yourself."

"My scars make me ugly…"

She shook her head, "No, they don't make you ugly. Think of them as… reminders that you made it. That you're still alive and nothing will stop you. Plus, Rin, they aren't really that noticeable anymore. And I think you're beautiful no matter what," she smiled and gave her a small squeeze.

"Good thing I didn't put on mascara yet," she said as she wiped the tears from her eyes, Lily always made such good points that always made her feel better. She hugged her sister, "I love you," she sniffled. She grabbed her mascara and left the bathroom so Lily could get ready. Rin walked to her room and she waited until her eyes dried before putting the mascara on. Now that she was completely ready, she laid on her bed and waited for Lily to get ready.

After thirty minutes of waiting, Rin finally heard Lily come out of the bathroom, "Rin?" she called for her, "Are you ready?"

Rin took a few breaths and got up, she was nervous now. What happens if she's not ready? She slowly emerged from her room and spotted Lily looking in the hallway mirror at her hair. She was wearing a black crop top with tiny gold specks on it, a white and yellow striped skirt, black knee high socks, and some yellow high top converse with black laces. Her long blond hair was straightened to perfection and her makeup was really natural looking, she was always so gorgeous. "You look pretty," Rin told her.

"Not as pretty as you," she winked at her. "Um," she went into their tiny living room and grabbed Rin's old backpack that hadn't been touched since the last time she'd went to school five months ago, "This'll have to do for now." She hadn't planned on Rin actually wanting to go back to school so she never got around to getting her supplies, "Sorry," she bit her lip, she really wished she'd gotten that stuff.

Rin took the orange bag from her and hugged it to her chest, "I think this'll do for the rest of the year," she loved that bag, it was her favorite color and it was the bag that Lily had given to her in the sixth grade, sure it had seen better days, but she still liked it for some reason. Rin went to her room and grabbed some notebooks and some pencils, and then returned to Lily's side.

"Okay," Lily nodded her head and laughed, "Ready?"

Rin sighed and looked up at her sister, "Ready," she grabbed her hand and they walked outside to Lily's 1969 corvette. They got in the car and Lily looked over at Rin to make sure she was alright. Sometimes when Rin had to do things that made her scared or uncomfortable, she'd have mini panic attacks, but all was okay for the moment. Lily started the car; Rin was still okay, so she smiled and started driving to the school, "Lily?" Rin said quietly.

"Yes doll?"

"I'm nervous…"

Oh no, Lily thought to herself, "Why is that hun?"

She shrugged, "I dunno, I just feel like it's gonna be really different. And I don't really have any friends," she frowned, she didn't like being without Lily, "Maybe this wasn't such a great idea…" she started breathing quickly.

Lily pulled the car over and tried calming Rin down, "It's all going to be okay, Rin." She grabbed her hand, Rin gripped her hand tightly, "And if you don't like it, you don't have to go back. Okay?" she smiled at her.

Rin's breathing slowed and her grasp on Lily's hand loosened, "O-Okay," she tried to smile.

"Okay," Lily said to her and started driving towards the school again, "If anything happens, just text me and I'll be right there."

Rin nodded, "I wish you could just stay with me…"

Lily thought for a moment, "I could stay in the office and you could visit me after every class," she suggested, she'd do anything for Rin. Plus, if she stayed, she'd be right there anytime Rin may need her.

"I-I don't wanna make you do that," she shook her head, "I'm not worth wasting your day…"

"Rin! You are worth everything to me. I love you and there is not a thing I wouldn't do for you," she told her. She hated it when Rin was so down on herself, it made her heart hurt. "I will be right there in that office if you need anything, okay?"

Rin smiled slightly and nodded, "Thank you Lily." She loved that her sister cared for her so much, it felt nice to feel loved in the right way.

Well, I hope you guys liked it! I'm really challenging myself with this story! I hate writing the scenes with Rin and her dad, they make me so sad:'( So, reviews and all that would be cool! Thanks for reading! xx LovelyLuvbi