Aya hated
surprise.
Well, actually
he had once loved surprise. Once. When he hadn't been living in this hell.
He had loved
the surprise Aya-chan and his parents had had for his birthday. That had been
his favourite one. There had been so many surprises too he had loved back then…
he couldn't even remember them again now.
But it all had
changed the the day he had had the cruelest surprise in his life. The day when
he had gone home only to find his parents slaughtered. The day when he hadn't
been able to save his sister because he had been too taken by surprise. When
the first fingers of cruel fate had touched his world for the very first time,
giving him surprise in the worst way imaginable.
And now… now
when he had finally been able to accept his life, to mold with his new world,
his new friends… to his fate… she had to come.
Ran!!
Bursting into
the flowershop, full of energy, full of laughter. And when she had finally
spotted him, she had run to him, hugging him as if he had been her best friend
in the whole world, as if everything had been okay.
Ran! You still remember me, right??
As indeed, he
did. How could he forget her? She still had that beautiful long, wavy purple
hair, still had that sparkling jade eyes, still had that beautiful smile on her
face. Her voice was still light, she was still cheerful, still friendly. She
was still… she.
It's me!! Hayami Reika!
Yes, she was
still the same Hayami Reika he remembered. Still the same Hayami Reika he had
fallen in love with during his high school years.
God, how long
had it been?
Her showing up
like that had opened up a part of his past that he had carefully locked away. A
part when he had still been an average boy, when all he had known was love and
laughter, when he still had had his happy family complete, when the worst thing
he had ever done was breaking his schoolmate's hand in a fight, when the thing
he had hatefully resented was only working part time in the restaurant.
When he still
had had his innocence, when his hands had still been unstained, when the cruel
world he was living now had existed only in novels and televisions.
And Reika had
been one of the important persons during that time. She had been the only girl
that could get so close with him beside his imouto. She had shown him the
world, had shown him all the happiness that he, being a quiet, a bit cold and
introvert person he had been, hadn't known.
But then, as
his world started to crumble, as the fate had held him fully in its hand, Reika
and all the happiness she had brought together had easily been out of the
picture.
And he had
forgotten about her, he really had. All the memories of her had been drowned
deeper and deeper in the pool of blood in his every mission.
He had, until a
few minutes ago.
And now that
she had showed up again, now that her image and the memories about her had
resurfaced again in his mind, he started to question himself about his feeling.
He couldn't
possibly loved her, could he?
No, he didn't
love her. Not anymore.
And even if he
still loved her, Aya doubt that Reika would love an assassin back. No, he
didn't want to wipe that smile from her face. He didn't want to take away that
happiness and cheerfulness away from her.
Wasn't it part
of his job to make sure that people like Reika was happy? To protect people
like Reika so that the smile would forever be on their face?
This is my address. Come over, will ya? I want to know
what the hell has happened to you. You know, maybe we can have fun together
again, have a few chat and talking about the good old days…
Aya stared at
the piece of paper on his hand. He stared, and then teared it into pieces,
letting the pieces fell to the floor.
No, he wouldn't
come.
He didn't want
Reika to find out what had happened to him these past years. He wanted to have the
memories the cheerful, full of life Reika in his heart.
Hadn't she once
been an important girl in his life?
And let it be
that Reika only had the memories of a quiet, unsocialized Ran in her mind.
Maybe that would be the best. Besides…
Besides…
"Aya,
what's wrong?"
Aya looked up
the the source of the voice, staring into a pair of deep liquid brown eyes.
Besides, he had
Ken now. Ken, his friend and his lover.
And that was
more than he could ever hope.
"Aya, you
look so… troubled. Is there something wrong happen??," the other boy
asked, concerned. "Oh, God, it's not Aya-chan, is it??"
What was it
about Ken that attracted him so greatly?
In a split
second, he realized that Ken reminded him so much of Reika. He was so friendly,
so cheerful, so warm, so full of energy, so brimming with life.
But it wasn't
just because of that.
"No, Ken,
nothing's wrong".
Ken eyed him
skeptically. "Okay…if you say so…". His eyes then focused on the
pieces of paper on the floor. "That is the address of that girl, isn't
it?"
In Aya's
opinion, Reika was perfect. Her every move was eye-catching in its unique ways,
everything she did was excelently done. It was as if she could do everything in
her own, even without any help.
"Why did
you tear this?"
But Ken… Ken
was different. Ken was so naïve, so clumsy, so careless, so hot-headed. He was
the do-now-think-later type of boy, and Ken needed someone to watch over him,
to keep him out of trouble.
Ken needed him.
And maybe, that was what attracted him to Ken.
Because he
needed to be needed. Reika didn't really needed him the way he wanted her to.
But Ken… Ken was needy and Aya needed to be needed.
"I don't
need that, Ken".
Ken raised his
eyebrows. "O~kay… so who is this girl? You got us really curious. You have
to see Yohji's expression when he saw the girl threw herself to you".
"Oh,"
Aya smiled smugly. "I prefer to find out *your* expression that
time".
"What was
that, Aya?," the brunette laughed. Aya smiled, listening to the sound of
his laughter, loving how just the sound of his laughter made him feel better.
"She was…
well, she was my girlfriend. Once," Aya said casually.
The laughter
suddenly died followed by a silence. "Oh…" Ken said finally.
"'Oh?',"
Aya echoed. "Are you jealous, Ken?"
"N…NO!!,"
Ken blurted out, his cheeks turned a lovely shade of red.
Aya's finger
played absent-mindedly with a rose. "She… she reminded me of you,
Ken".
"Huh? Me?
In what way?"
"I don't
know. Your character, maybe. But then again, maybe not. She was perfect while
you are… well, you know," he said, the corner of his lips tugged up,
forming a small smile.
"Huh??
I'll try not to take that as an offence," Ken said, hands on his hips.
Aya let out a
chuckle.
"Um…Aya…?,"
Ken asked hesitantly.
"What?"
Ken frowned at
him, his expression unsure. "Is that…my imperfections make me…well… worse
in your eyes?".
Aya stared at
him, taking in the other boy's feature. Looking at the way his brows knitted
together in a cute way, looking at his large coffee-colored eyes, at the pouty
curves of his mouth, at the unsure stares he was throwing, Aya gave in to the
urge to hold Ken in his arms and kiss him.
He reached out,
pulling Ken by his hand, leaning for a kiss but stop when his lips only a few
millimetres away from the brunette's lips.
"No, Ken.
That makes you even more wonderful".
Then he
completed the kiss.
And as he felt
Ken smiling and opening his mouth for Aya to deepen the kiss, all thoughts of
Reika laid forgotten in the farthest place in the back of his mind.
Yes, Reika was
a past, and with every ticking of second, the memories of her would eventually
fade away. Now, laid in front of him, was the relationship with a certain
brunette, waiting to be explored.