Hello to every author who took the initiative to read my story! My username is LaoevanSVU, and I am a diehard Law and Order Special Victims Unit fan, even though I don't really write many SVU stories. I should write more, I just need to organize my ideas.

Anyway, this is my second Law and Order SVU story, and it is an Alternate Universe story that I thought up randomly. I wondered what would happen if Olivia's mother had died earlier in her life than in the show, instead of when Olivia was taking care of herself with a job and an apartment. I changed a lot of information around, like the fact that now Alexandra Cabot is poor instead of rich, and that somehow Kathy is in this story too. (You'll see that I love the evil-Kathy-is-a-raging-bitch stereotype, even though I know that it's not true in the show). *REMEMBER, RATED T FOR LANGUAGE AND VIOLENCE* Enjoy, and make sure to review!

Chapter 1

"You're worthless!" They hissed, jeering evilly at the huddled figure of Olivia Benson. She was crouched underneath a wooden bench; trembling and biting her lip, trying not to cry.

"Stupid, ugly, and fat; why were you even born loser? Run back home to your mommy and read a comic book or something you fucking nerd!" It was the usual abuse that happened everyday in the girl's locker room; The Clique that held power over the school had found Olivia trying to get ready for gym. They surrounded her; a flock of hungry vultures that were diving in for the kill as they circled the small space menacingly.

Kathy, the leader of the clique, had stolen her clothing and was dangling it in front of Olivia with a satisfied smirk on her face. She turned over the waistband of Olivia's maroon and yellow sweatpants, (which were the hideous color of the school because they were the cheapest dyes to produce), and her smirk widened, reading the tag aloud.

"Hmm, let's see… Oh! A size extra, extra, extra, extra, extra large? I didn't know that they made clothing for whales! Go on a diet you fat pig. I swear I want to fucking knife you for being such a big-ass bitch!"

The class signal rung; a clear warning bell that signified the near beginning of the gym period. Kathy bunched up the pants with disgust and hurled them at Olivia; who had silent tears streaming down her face. She then waved her hand arrogantly and signaled for her posse to follow, giggling madly as they spat in Olivia's direction as they stepped around her, making death threats towards her huddled figure. With a snap of her gum Kathy and her Clique left, slamming the locker room doors wildly.

Olivia watched them go with silent sobs racking her body. It was only three months into school; yet she had become the biggest target in The Clique's reign of terror. The first week it had been her hair that they made fun of; which was short, dark brown, and pin straight unless it got humid, like it always did in rainy New York days. The next week it had been her almost invisible acne, which earned her the title of 'pizza face' and 'the Catskills' even though they lived in Manhattan and the island had a relatively flat appearance. Now it was her weight that they chose to point out; even though she was only a little heavier than the anorexic girls that attended the low-class high school. What would it be next week, her obvious poverty?

Olivia grabbed her clothes and shakily pulled the t-shirt over her trembling torso. She picked up the now dirty sweatpants and dusted them off, laying them neatly on the bench next to her. Then she hastily shoved her normal clothes into her locker, noticing the red lines running up and down her bare slender legs.

Olivia cursed herself for being so useless and pitiful while starting to scratch up and down her thick pale legs. She always blamed the redness and the claw marks that covered her lower extremities on over-itched mosquito bites that had burst from spastic nail assault. The pain from the clawing helped her clam down in these situations; it took away her anger and expelled the dark thoughts that she sometimes had of taking her scratching to the next level.

Today however, her legs looked like she had fallen down a few flights of stairs and ripped them up. It would be hard to disguise but oh well, she was known for her clumsiness also; it was a fake cover-up for her disorder. She actually had the grace of a ballerina and the ear like a composer's, but no one looked past her outside. That's why she had no friends and was a loner for all of her time at this horrible high school.

The rest of that day had gone extremely badly, with the gym coach yelling at her for being tardy, the failed Trig test that looked like an alien's map before she started and when she finished, the inability to buy any lunch because she had no money, and finally the fact that she had walked through a back shortcut around the school and had gotten jumped by a gang and mugged. The culprits had blindsided her, and then left her winded on the ground while they kicked the crap out of her for not having anything worth stealing. They stalked away empty-handed and cursing as Olivia had slowly gotten to her feet while clutching her sides with bruises covering her skin.

As she got pushed down the rough metal steps of the front entrance by the throng of students, Olivia pulled the tattered remains of her thin grey hoodie around her frame with the cold, soggy, November wind chilling her to the bone. She couldn't afford a proper winter jacket for herself, so she had to make do with what the orphanage had where she lived. When she walked past a rainbow arrangement of graffiti on a dirty tenement's wall that was a landmark saying that she was almost at her destination, she wondered how it had all gone so wrong after junior high school.

Olivia had been an only child to a messed-up family; her mother took care of her while her father abandoned them, being the sick rapist that he was. Her mother had helped them scrape through life by working double-shifts at restaurants, hooking, and saving her low salary in a jar. Olivia was happier then; even though it was tough; she had a loving mother who supported her through everything and a few close-knit friends in her elementary schools. That all changed when her mother had died in a hit-and-run situation where the driver didn't even have the decency to stop at the scene. Then Olivia had been forced into an orphanage where she lived when she wasn't busy being harassed at the dumpster she called school. It was all downhill from that very day, from the moment she was dragged away from her mother's corpse by a traffic cop, the only hope in her miserable life.

Olivia finally made it to the green cracked stoop of Mother Mary's Orphanage. It was owned by an elderly lady, (who was named was Mary) that took care of about twenty or so children that lived together in tight quarters. It was nice there but not the same as before, with the strict curfew and wailing of the younger children that stirred with irrational nightmares and sickness. Olivia pushed open the door, which was ragged and hanging on one hinged that creaked like a witch when moved slightly. The sound made her sensitive ears hurt and she cringed, wishing that she could just rip the damn thing off its hinges so it would stop.

"Wipe your feet on the carpet Olivia!" called 'Mother' Mary as Olivia stepped into the threshold, exhausted after walking fifteen blocks.

"Yes 'Mother'." Olivia called, hating with all of her heart that she had to call this old bag her mother. But 'Mother' Mary demanded proper respect, now didn't she? Olivia had brought up the argument many times that she didn't think that it was right to call Mary by that title, but she had been warned that she would get transferred if she ever spoke again. So Olivia complied by saying the one word that kept her off the streets. She would rather pay rent, she had declared to herself in her head.

She breathed in the musty, damp smell of her living establishment; she wouldn't call it a home, and tiptoed through the narrow hallway and into the bedroom, avoiding the mess of brightly colored plastic toys that littered the ground in front of her in the darkness.

Once there, she threw her three year old book bag onto her small bunk and plopped down on it with a sigh. The book bag was the last one that her mother had brought with her, and she refused to use anything else. The black bag was of the hiking variety, and it was now faded and worn at the seams with two of its zippers broken. On the back of one of the straps Olivia had written Serena in big letters with a permanent marker; whenever she was remembering her mother she rubbed the name rhythmically with her thumb. The movement left her lost in memories for a while; that's what kept her sane. At least partially.

Olivia stretched out and just stayed there for a moment; almost drifting off into sleep when a small hand tugged on her jean cuffs.

"Hiya Olivia, can we play today?" Inquired the small high-pitched voice of Olivia's upper-bed bunkmate. Olivia rolled over and came to be face-to-face with the baby-blue eyes of her most adored orphan-mate Alex, who smiled brightly to reveal the missing and crooked teeth of an eight year old. Olivia played with Alex or Alexandra fully when she came home usually, but today was different for a reason. Olivia patted the little girl's blonde locks and smiled half-heartedly as Alex pulled out a used coloring book that she was hiding behind her back hopefully, a pack of fat crayons in one hand.

"Not today Alex, I have a lot of homework!" She exclaimed in a fake happy tone. "Which I never do." She added to herself bitterly. Olivia gently nudged Alex away from her and pulled out a random notebook that was full of musical scales instead of notes to deceive her.

Alex nodded trotted away like a little horse and went to go ask someone else for entertainment. Olivia sat quietly, contemplating what to do when she saw a ripped page in her music notebook. It was the fifth page in the composition of her song "End of All Hope", and it had the most interesting lines in it. It must have been someone in school who stole her notebook, or from when she got mugged, she thought angrily, clenching it between her wiry hands.

Olivia then tucked away the notebook into her bag; patting it the way a mother would her child and squatted down by her bed. She reached underneath the floorboards for a cold metal switchblade that she kept tucked away from harm and prying eyes. She slipped it into her pocket without a word and slowly stood up with a new felt rage inside of her. She walked over to the small bathroom that was connected to the bedroom and locked the door behind her.

Olivia pulled up the sleeve of her arm and looked at her bruised peach skin, watching the life pulse steadily though her veins with interest. She gripped the metal handle in her pocket and through about the day's events. "Okay, so first I walk to school, then get abused in the locker room, flunk my social life and Trig test, get mugged, and come home to the place that I soon won't even be able to live in soon!" It was true, Olivia was seventeen, and she was going to get legally kicked out of the orphanage at eighteen. She didn't know what she was going to do then, but all she could tell was that it wasn't going to be pretty. She was doomed, and in her gut she could feel it.

Olivia watched her clenched hand and noticed that the veins budged, straining to pass blood through her. "Sort of like my life, right? It's all one big struggle, like a fight. My arm has more symbolism then my existence! I'm just what the Kathy and the whores say; a stupid, worthless, loser! I can't pass school, I have no friends; it's hopeless!" She screamed in her head.

Olivia stared at her chocolate brown eyes in the mirror and laughed manically. "I was named Olivia in order to show that I'd be strong like my grandmother throughout my life. (I made that up). Isn't it ironic that I'm faithless and giving everything up?" Olivia suddenly heard the C# that Amy Lee would always hit in her most favorite song by Evanescence, "Everybody's Fool". She then remembered the lyrics that went with that portion.

"Without the mask, where will you hide? Can't find yourself, lost in your lie!" The way that Olivia interpreted it, the entire song was supposed to represent the fake girls in her school, but in her opinion, those two lines applied to anyone who could use them. If you couldn't put on a disguise, then where would you be? The entire song was amazing, but even listening to it in her head wouldn't calm her down today.

Olivia took in a deep breath and reached into her pocket, feeling once again the sharp cold of her metal friend. She determinedly withdrew it and positioned it above her arm, as she always did, but never had the drive to finish the deed. Today though was different. She closed her eyes and made one swift motion.

Flick.

OMG CLIFF-HANGER! What will happen next?

If you want me to continue this:

1. Press the review button/link below. I don't care if you're logged in or anonymous, I LOVE reviews.

2. Press the favorite button, you know that you loved it!

3. Do both one and two!

4. Review me, but criticize it as much as you want. Any ideas or suggestions are much appreciated! WINK WINK PEOPLE

Thank you for taking the time for this! I hope that you liked my story; it really took a lot out of me to write so depressingly. This was actually an idea for an English assignment that I un-censored for Fanfiction, and expanded on. I will make another chapter(s) if I get love from my readers!

Thank you again and have a very nice day everyone.

~LaoevanSVU