I don't own the rights to Gundam Wing, and I'm not the creator of the
question that's, well, in question, but I do know the author personally. And I also know she's
either going to glomp me or kill me if she reads this. Maybe even both. *gulps*
To the Otaku it May Concern,
"Hey Trowa? Are Pixi Stix Flammable?" The response to this innocent question, which was first uttered by a not so innocent fanfiction authoress, is yes. FOR THE FINAL FRICKIN' TIME, YES!! To imagine such an inane statement could cause such an uproar among the masses boggles the mind! It is appearing at conventions, schools, and other public places, a number to immense to imagine. The answer is debated and argued, with people feeling the need to scream the answer when it's asked. But they are too inconsiderate to realize it is not their responsibility to do so.
Heero receives thousands of fanmail a week, and miraculously finds time to respond to each of them, simply writing, "Omae o Korosu", and making the postman deliver them at gunpoint. Duo writes back to the cute girls who send him pictures by gracing them with a strand of hair, but if he continues that ritual, there's no doubt he'll be bald before long. Quatre gets letters from many fangirls, but not surprisingly, a few fan boys too, and now he's considering their advice to paint the Sandrock pink to match his shirt. As for Wufei, he doesn't share any information, but I think the building piles of scorched letters and his occasionally yells of "INJUSTICE!!" in the middle of the night might be a clue.
But no longer do I read mail that is littered with questions such as, "How do you get your hair to stay that way?", or "I'm confused. Is Catherine your sister or not?", or even, "Are you gay? I mean, everybody knows about Quatre, but you're kinda on the edge in my mind." No, these have been replaced by the universal and extremely annoying, "Hey Trowa? Are Pixi Stix Flammable?", scrawled in way that makes you think the writer had waaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyy too much sake before getting the courage before putting whatever they could scrounge out of the junk drawer to the back of what is most likely their report that needed to be turned in last Friday. I guess highly condensed and artificially flavored sugar in a tube can do that to you.
Remaining cool, I politely respond, only to find more letters, all asking the same damn question. The matter has grown quite out of hand, and I finally discovered my solution when seeing a fanfiction writer in a self-asserted Gundam Wing story. After glomping me incessantly, and asking the ever original question, "Hey Trowa? Are Pixi Stix Flammable?", did I implore her to help, for I knew she was aquatinted to the creator of the statement that I have grown to hate so much. We conversed together, and she agreed to take responsibility in posting my answer to the world, therefore stopping this nonsense:
Yes, Pixi Stix are flammable, although you might have keep them under constant flame to burn the whole stick, or rather "Stic" I suppose. Don't do it under parental supervision, unless your parents are stupid enough to let you play with fire. Wait, scratch that. I don't want to get sued. Well, that's my answer. Please accept it, and may God help you all.
Sincerely,
Trowa "I am not mute." Barton
To the Otaku it May Concern,
"Hey Trowa? Are Pixi Stix Flammable?" The response to this innocent question, which was first uttered by a not so innocent fanfiction authoress, is yes. FOR THE FINAL FRICKIN' TIME, YES!! To imagine such an inane statement could cause such an uproar among the masses boggles the mind! It is appearing at conventions, schools, and other public places, a number to immense to imagine. The answer is debated and argued, with people feeling the need to scream the answer when it's asked. But they are too inconsiderate to realize it is not their responsibility to do so.
Heero receives thousands of fanmail a week, and miraculously finds time to respond to each of them, simply writing, "Omae o Korosu", and making the postman deliver them at gunpoint. Duo writes back to the cute girls who send him pictures by gracing them with a strand of hair, but if he continues that ritual, there's no doubt he'll be bald before long. Quatre gets letters from many fangirls, but not surprisingly, a few fan boys too, and now he's considering their advice to paint the Sandrock pink to match his shirt. As for Wufei, he doesn't share any information, but I think the building piles of scorched letters and his occasionally yells of "INJUSTICE!!" in the middle of the night might be a clue.
But no longer do I read mail that is littered with questions such as, "How do you get your hair to stay that way?", or "I'm confused. Is Catherine your sister or not?", or even, "Are you gay? I mean, everybody knows about Quatre, but you're kinda on the edge in my mind." No, these have been replaced by the universal and extremely annoying, "Hey Trowa? Are Pixi Stix Flammable?", scrawled in way that makes you think the writer had waaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyy too much sake before getting the courage before putting whatever they could scrounge out of the junk drawer to the back of what is most likely their report that needed to be turned in last Friday. I guess highly condensed and artificially flavored sugar in a tube can do that to you.
Remaining cool, I politely respond, only to find more letters, all asking the same damn question. The matter has grown quite out of hand, and I finally discovered my solution when seeing a fanfiction writer in a self-asserted Gundam Wing story. After glomping me incessantly, and asking the ever original question, "Hey Trowa? Are Pixi Stix Flammable?", did I implore her to help, for I knew she was aquatinted to the creator of the statement that I have grown to hate so much. We conversed together, and she agreed to take responsibility in posting my answer to the world, therefore stopping this nonsense:
Yes, Pixi Stix are flammable, although you might have keep them under constant flame to burn the whole stick, or rather "Stic" I suppose. Don't do it under parental supervision, unless your parents are stupid enough to let you play with fire. Wait, scratch that. I don't want to get sued. Well, that's my answer. Please accept it, and may God help you all.
Sincerely,
Trowa "I am not mute." Barton