Title: Rules

Word Count: 967

Pairing: NaruSakuSasuSai.

Set: Real world AU, even if it doesn't seem like it.

Summary: AU. There were rules in every relationship. Theirs was no different. NaruSakuSasuSai.

Edited/Looked At By: MaybelleTheRAWRDragon.

Author's Notes: OK, so I had my close friend Maybelle look at it, but she looked at it before I went through and re-did a lot of it. So, I'm sorry if there are any mistakes here... I did do editing, but I forgot to look at it once more. I'm just too lazy. Anyways, here we go, another NaruSakuSasuSai oneshot! My hope is to create to at least thirty in two years or less. Lesse see...I have six (including this one), so I've only got twenty-four more to go-! Lol. OK. So I must apologize in advance-this starts out happy and crazy, but then turns back to sad at the very end. What can I say...Sad writing runs in my bones. I CANNOT, and WILL NOT apologize for that. Yup... Don't forget to review! My last NaruSakuSasuSai oneshot, Call Me Back, only got what...like, two reviews? That's sad, people, very sad...I EXPECT MORE!

Disclaimer: WHAT? You think I, a struggling author, owns the rights to Naruto...? HA, YEAH RIGHT, I WISH! I own nothing but the plot for this story.

Warning: Foursome. Implied...sex, language...? Maybe.

Note: In the story, the rules appear in italics.

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Rules

"NARUTO!"

Rule number one. When Sakura is pissed, don't try to make things better. It is better, in the long run, to just leave her be.

"Yes, Sakura-chan?"

"GET! OUT!" Sakura roared, throwing a pillow in his direction. He dropped to the floor, it whizzed past him, and-

Rule number two. Don't hit Sasuke with anything. It will piss him off.

-hit Sasuke.

Dead silence.

The Uchiha was pissed.

"Sa-ku-ra," he hissed.

He rivaled Sakura at her worst.

"Yes Sasuke?" She said, her voice sickly-sweet. Naruto looked at Sai, who was just calmly painting away.

"Why did you throw a pillow at me?" He asked.

"I meant to hit Naruto. But he ducked," She said. Naruto gulped.

Sasuke's eyes turned towards Naruto.

They were narrowed.

Ah, crap.

Naruto just said, "I didn't know you were standing behind me."

Rule number three. Don't point out the obvious. It's just a bad idea in general, especially with Sasuke.

"Obviously," Sasuke said, and, in a second, Naruto was sent flying.

Rule number four. Don't interrupt Sai while he's painting.

"Dickless! Get OFF!"

Today was not a good day for Naruto.

He fled into the kitchen for his ramen.

Rule number five. If Naruto is upset, do NOT take his ramen away from him. You will be sent to disaster land, and, that's not a good thing, because we'll miss you…well, Naruto won't. Because you touched his ramen.

A pale hand grabbed his bowl. Naruto turned around to glare into the eyes of Sasuke.

"What do you want, teme?" He growled.

"…" The Uchiha said nothing, a smirk on his face.

"Hand over the ramen, and no one gets hurt."

Rule number six. If you deny Sasuke his make-out sessions, you will dealt with a grumpy-and horny-Uchiha.

"Naruto…" Sasuke purred.

Naruto blinked. Sasuke didn't purr, unless…

"No."

"Why not?" Sasuke's eyes darkened.

"I'm NOT IN THE MOOD," Naruto spat.

Rule number seven. If Naruto says he's not in the mood-which is rare-he's NOT IN THE MOOD. Don't bother him.

Sasuke pinned him up against the kitchen sink, and his mouth descended upon the wriggling blond.

Rule number eight. While watching two of you make-out is hot, Sakura doesn't like to be left out.

Sakura pulled the two of the apart. "HEY," She said. "It hasn't even been thirty minutes!"

Rule number nine. Interrupting one of Sasuke's make-out sessions is not a good idea. So don't do it.

Sasuke glared at her as Sai casually strolled into the kitchen and proceeded to ravish Naruto's mouth while Sakura and Sasuke had a glaring contest.

Naruto weakly pulled on Sakura's shirt. "Join," He croaked to both of them.

Sasuke did, but Sakura bit her lip, leaning against a wall.

Rule number ten. SEX IS NOT A REWARD FOR BREAKING THE RULES! SO…NO SEX IF YOU BREAK THE RULES!

Number ten was the one most often ignored, but Sakura tried to stand by their rules.

"No," She said. They stopped and looked at her.

Rule number eleven. DO NOT SAY NO TO SAKURA! YOUR BODY WILL GO THROUGH WALLS!

"But…Sakura…" Naruto whined.

"No," She repeated.

Rule number twelve. Three horny, incredibly aroused boys that are denied sex is not a good thing. So…avoid it, if all possible.

Her eyes darkened, and she shook her head again, pink locks dancing, emerald eyes glowing. "No," She repeated. "You broke the rules."

Naruto sighed exasperatedly. "But, SAKURA-"

"SHUT UP NARUTO!"

"Sakura," Sasuke said. "Shut up. Come here."

Rule number thirteen. If Sasuke tells you to do something…do it.

"No," She repeated, and turned around to walk out of the kitchen.

That failed, because she found herself facing a wall, squished in between it and Sasuke.

"Sakura…"

Rule number fourteen. There is a special way Sasuke talks. When he does so…do not try to get away. You will be sore for weeks.

"Sasuke."

"Yes Sakura?"

"Let me go."

"No," He breathed into her ear.

Shivers ran down her spine.

"Sasuke…"

By now Naruto and Sai had joined the two, and Sakura was not happy.

"No!" She said, as Naruto pushed up her shirt, and began to kiss and bit her stomach.

"Stop fighting," Sasuke murmured into her ear. "You want this as much as the rest of us do."

Sakura lay in between Sasuke and Sai, Naruto on Sai's other side, almost completely on top of the artist. She turned towards Sai and proceeded to snuggle with him.

Rule number fifteen. Sakura and Sai like to snuggle. They will, if they are together, will snuggle with each other, but if one of them is not around…do not deny them the pleasure. You will be horny for weeks.

Sai sighed into her neck, and Sakura giggled, loudly, squirming.

Rule number sixteen. Sakura is ticklish. Do not provoke her…

Rule number seventeen. Sasuke hates getting kicked, while trying to sleep. Do NOT kick him.

"Sakura…"

"Wha-what?" Sakura giggled.

"Stop kicking me."

"I-can't-!" Sakura said, as Sai was full-blown tickling her now.

"Sai."

"What, emo bastard?"

"Stop tickling her."

"I don't think so…"

Naruto snored, rolled off Sai, and fell on the floor.

He was still asleep.

Rule number eighteen. Naruto doesn't mind being left out, as long as he gets to participate in the round afterwards.

Whenever it was just the three of them, it became more serious.

With Naruto, it was all like a joke-like the four of them didn't love each other.

Rule number nineteen. Sakura will get emotional. That's a fact…so don't stop it.

The phone rang. Sakura went over to it, picked it up, listened, hung up…

…and dropped to the floor, crying.

The three men-Naruto had woken up now-looked, at each other, then went to her, hugging her.

Rule number twenty. A heartfelt hug between ALL FOUR of us is the best comfort we can give.

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Author's End Notes: So I left the end open for interpetation, for the most part. What made her cry...? We may never know. Actually, we probably won't, because I don't plan on writing a sequel...I never get to them, heh heh...Anyways, please review and tell me what you thought about the FIC itself, because I need more motivation to write these oneshots, because I'm running out of juice. (I am currently working on another one which will be released soon, called Beneath the Surface, so please look for that...?) Don't forget to review, and NO FLAMES, darnit!

Ja ne,

LadyNightmarexSasuke