A/N:

Hey y'all. I did not mean for this to take another month, but here we are. This was inspired by a post I made on Tumblr about a headcanon I had for the academy. Kids can be vicious creatures, and they seem like they try really hard to hurt themselves. You cannot tell me that the kids in the academy were not throwing themselves off of the top of buildings and from trees. You cannot tell me that there were no brawls inside of the school, and that they weren't practicing very dangerous taijutsu moves on each other. Tsubaki is an oc and she'll probably pop up in the main story (maybe).

Poor Tsubaki was thrown face first into a class of geniuses who ask 'why' about everything. Teacher, why can't we eat poison until we build immunity? Teacher why can't I throw my classmate out of the third floor window? Teacher why can't we reenact the warring era? Teacher why can't we use real weapons instead of rubber?

Tsubaki Hanamaru knew that she wanted to be an academy teacher since her own academy days. Unlike the other students in her class who idolized the Fourth for his strength, speed, and techniques, Tsubaki instead looked up to the various academy teachers who were in charge of guiding the next generation of Konoha shinobi.

The idea really settled in her head after one of her favorite academy teachers, -Mumoi-sensei- managed to protect her classmates after a field trip into the surrounding forests outside the gates of the village. With well over 20 students depending on his protection, Mumoi-sensei managed to dispatch several brazen foreign shinobi who were after the clan kids in her class.

Granted, looking back the foreign shinobi were only genin level missing nin looking for a quick buck through the selling of Konoha kekkei genkai, but at the time, Tsubaki thought that Mumoi-sensei was the bravest shinobi that she knew.

All of that led to her current career choice. Instead of going into the chunin corps or becoming a gate guard, Tsubaki decided to pursue the honest and noble career of an academy teacher.

Boy was that a bad choice.

Tsubaki didn't get into half of the amount of trouble that her students do. She was a nice, quiet, civilian born student, who was not half as talented as the clan kids in her class. She listened to her teacher, she practiced her taijutsu and ninjutsu diligently, and she payed attention in all of her classes.

She realized that she wanted to impart the same feelings that she felt when she was in the academy onto the next generation of Konoha shinobi, which is why Tsubaki went through the trouble of becoming a chunin (the addition cushion in her paycheck is only a happy coincidence) and then tackling the grueling task of becoming a certified teacher.

Now at 20 years old, Tsubaki felt like she was 30. She had only had her class for about 3 months, yet it felt like it's been 40 years. The first class she was assigned was a newly inducted class of six year olds, all of whom came from various backgrounds, yet their entrance exams were high enough to land them all a placement in her classroom. Which Tsubaki thought was a tad bit odd. Who gave a newly certified teacher a class of kids who scored the highest on their entrance exams?

Nevertheless, Tsubaki entered her classroom on the first day with a pep in her step because she was finally going to realize her dreams! Only she stepped into her classroom to find the kids seemingly re-enacting a war zone. The class was split in half, with one half of the class on one side of the room, and the other on the other side of the room. The desk were pulled out of their original position to be used as cover, while their chairs were used as shields for the crumpled paper that was being lobbed back and forward. One enterprising child, a girl with the pinkest hair that Tsubaki had ever seen, was soaking paper napkins with water and handing it off to some of teammates to be thrown at the kids on the opposing team.

It all went downhill from that day forward.

Day after day, it seemed like her students were finding new and interesting ways to kill themselves and give her more gray hairs. One day she sent them out for lunch, only to come back to an Aburame egging an Inuzuka into doing a front flip off of a branch of a tree. Another day she stumbled upon the Yamanaka in her class trying to convince some of her fellow classmates into building up their immunity to poisons by having them eat a poisonous plant.

Just yesterday she had to break up a brawl between a blonde loudmouth (he wasn't even in her class!) and one of the Uchiha. The rest of the class was not helping the situation at all, with the pink haired civilian born child taking score, and another refereeing.

Only 3 months in, and she already felt like she was 50 instead of 20. Every morning she finds more and more strands of gray hair popping up in her brown hair like weeds, mocking her by showing up mainly in the front of her head where she can't hide them, instead of hidden in the depths of her hair.

But today was going to be different. Yesterday after class dismissed and she righted the furniture in the classroom, she went to find one of her old classmates. The man, Maito Guy, might be a little (a lot) eccentric, but he was one of the best shinobi to pop out of the academy. So with Guy's advice in mind, Tsubaki developed a new lesson plan to wear out her students to prevent them from doing more, potentially dangerous stunts.

Standing in front of her students (and the blonde loudmouth, seriously where did he even come from!?), Tsubaki couldn't help the grin that crossed her face.

"Alright children! Follow me outside!" Tsubaki said.

Excited looks crossed the faces of her students as they rushed to the front of the classroom.

"Don't forget to hold hands with your line-buddy!" Tsubaki hollered, as she dodged the bomb rush of little feet stomping everywhere without regards to what, or who, they stepped on.

"But sensei! Boys have cooties!" The blonde Yamanaka said. The other girls grumbled behind her. The little Yamanaka had her hands on her hip and a look on her face that said, 'obey me' that could only come from being an only child.

Before Tsubaki could remind the girls that they were in school to be shinobi, not wilting damsels in distress, the Yamanaka's little pink haired friend spoke up.

"Kei-nii said that boys are gross and don't wash their hands after they pee-pee sensei," she said. Tsubaki grimaced. By the door, one of the boys, a Yuhi by the looks of it, was digging around in his nose like he was searching for a chakra leyline. With a shifty look on his face, he proceeded to stuff his finger into his mouth with a look of delight on his face.

Well what pinky said wasn't not true, because some of the men that she knew were pretty disgusting. For instance, Genma-senpai could drop his sendon on the floor and pick it right back up, so that he could stick it back in his mouth. Gai, bless his youthful soul, would go the whole day without taking a shower even after a vigorous workout session. However she was trying to teach her students teamwork.

"That doesn't matter," Tsubaki said. She held up her hand to stop the complaining that she knew was coming, "but for this time only I'll make an exception."

The girls cheered amongst themselves, while the girl closet to the Yuhi quickly gave herself and her friend a cooties-shot. Evidently the Yuhi was not as subtle as he thought he was.

Making her way to the door, Tsubaki clapped her hands to gain the attention of her noisy students.

"Instead of line-buddies, we're going to do something different! Get in line from shortest to tallest, the faster we do this, the faster we'll be able to go outside!"

The children quickly huddled together to find out who the shortest were versus who were the tallest.

"Nu-uh! I'm not the shortest one! You are!" The blonde loudmouth said (seriously, what the hell?), while pointing at the Inuzuka (at this point, she should probably try to remember the name of her students).

The Yamanaka, Ino if she remembers correctly, stomped her little foot and rolled her eyes so hard, Tsubaki wouldn't be surprised if she gave herself a headache.

"Shut up Naruto! You aren't even in this class," the Yamanaka, Ino god Tsubaki sucked at remembering names, exclaimed.

"Besides, Hinata is the shortest one. You're the nexest Naruto," Ino continued. The bossy blonde started directing the rest of her classmates into the correct order based on their height.

"Thank you Ino-chan for taking the lead in this mission," Tsubaki smiled down at her newest favorite, albeit loud, student.

"Since Ino-chan showed leadership by showing everyone their place in line, she'll be the team leader for today," Tsubaki said. Ino beamed up at her, while the rest of her classmates whined about the unfairness.

"Since Ino-chan is the team leader for today, you all have to listen to what she says," Tsubaki said. The teacher bent down and motioned for Ino to come closer so that she could whisper something into her ear.

"Tell everyone to put their hands on the shoulders of the person in front of them," Tsubaki whispered.

Ino nodded her head and turned to yell at her classmates. With the children organized how she wanted, Ino turned to Tsubaki for her next instructions.

"As team leader, you will be line leader for today and you have to make sure that everyone is staying in line and keeping their hands on each other's shoulders," Tsubaki said.

Turning to the door, Tsubaki slid it open and motioned the train of children out of the door.

"Alright Ino-taichou, lead your team to the training grounds," Tsubaki said to Ino. Ino's face became serious as she led her classmates out of the class door and into the hall.

Unlike most times where there were at least five kids injured whenever Tsubaki brought her students out of the classroom, this time there were no injuries, and almost minimal noise. At least except for the occasional grumblings from the unfortunate kids who had the back of their shoes stepped on by the person behind them.

Outside Tsubaki instructed Ino to have her team line up shoulder to shoulder while Tsubaki put together an obstacle course. Finished, Tsubaki instructed Ino to split her classmates up into squads of four and then hand out blank scrolls to each of the teams.

In the end, there were five squads of four, with Ino the odd one out. However, Tsubaki had a plan.

"Today you all will be competing to see who finishes the obstacle course the fastest. The fastest team today wins a secret surprise," Tsubaki said with a grin. The children whispered to each other excitedly, eager to find out what the secret prize is.

"But sensei, what about me?" Ino questioned with big blue eyes.

Tsubaki pat the top of Ino's head, "You'll be my co-captain for this exercise. Regardless of who wins, you'll still get the surprise as well."

Before the other kids could start complaining, Tsubaki told them how they had to complete the obstacle course. The first part of the course had them doing a straight sprint to a adult sized dummy next to orange cones. The first person to go had to drag the dummy from its starting point to stretchers lying twenty feet away. They had to roll the dummy onto the stretcher and bandage its head. After that they had to run to their second team member standing next to a tree another twenty feet away from them. The first teammate had to hand their team's blank scroll over to the second member of their team. The second member of the team then had to climb the tree that they were next to, to retrieve a kunai hiding up in the leaves. After that they had to climb down and climb other trees in order to find three more kunai.

After finding four kunai, the second member of the team had to run about twenty feet to their third teammate, where they had to give them all four kunai as well as the blank scroll. The third teammate then has to throw all four kunai into a circle target hanging into a pole ten feet from their position. If they don't land all four correctly one after the other, they have to run over to the target to pull the kunai out and start throwing all over again. Once landing all four kunai into the target correctly, the target will fall and the third teammate will have to run over to pick up the target and drag it over with them to their last teammate to hand them the team's scroll.

The job of the fourth teammate is head over to a wooden contraption where they have to climb to the top of a ten foot pole and jump from that pole to the next, and the one's after that. After hopping on eight poles, the fourth teammate then had to scramble up the side of a fifteen foot inclined wooden beam, which they had to launch themselves off of to grab a rope hanging ten feet away from the edge of the beam. After catching the rope, the fourth teammate had to swing themselves side-to-side until they gained enough momentum to throw themselves to another inclined. If they made the jump, the fourth teammate had to scuttle under a wooden plank that was only a foot and a half from the ground. After scrambling under the plank, they had to deposit their scroll into a bucket and pick up another, slightly larger scroll, which they had to bring over to a crate that was sitting near the entrance to the training ground.

Hopefully, by the time her students finished running the course, they'll be too tired to try to kill each other in the classroom and actually listen to her lesson for once. If they aren't tired, she could always make them run it again, but in the opposite direction and with different people in different positions.

I'm probably gonna write other stories in this universe which may be spoilers for the main story. If I do write more fics for this universe, you'll only be able to read it on my Ao3 account because it's easier for me to tag and link stories together.

I'm over at Tumblr under ms-lionofgod (yes I changed my username) and I crosspost over at Ao3 under byebyesanity.