A/N: Yes, another oneshot! And, it's the same theme as the other two: Brothers! This one is lighter though, and isn't death related at all! Aren't you proud, AliasAurora? Well, I hope you like it. It's only really long because of the dialogue, and there's a lot, which means space imbetween. That also means that some parts may seem rushed, sorry. Tell me if you see any mistakes.

I'm dedicating this one to theretard5892, for being a pal and as reward for getting 1000 reviews and no flames! (I got honor of being 1000th!) I just hope she likes the reward. I'm also dedicating it to AliasAurora. She is very nice and helped me get situated into the website, she's also filled my boredom time with her awesome stories!

Enjoy!

Jumping Jacks

"I'm back!" Alphonse walked over to the group of boys that sat underneath the playground set. They were all chuckling amongst themselves.

"That would SO work," Edward said, continuing his own conversation. He heard Alphonse, "But how would we… oh, sorry Al, hi!"

"Hi Big Brother! What'cha talkin' about?"

One of the other boys, Tim, answered, "We thought of a prank that would be really funny! I mean, pee your pants funny!"

Edward gave Tim a Hey, I'm the leader, remember? look, but then grinned at Tim's meek expression. "You see, you know the old Gym coach is so fat? Well, we thought that we could get somebody to ask how to do the jumping jacks when he asks us to. It won't work though."

Alphonse was grinning the whole time Edward was talking. But now he had on a pouting face. "Well, why can't we do it?"

"Well, the rest of us have already had him for a year. We can't ask him how to do a jumping jack!"

"Why can't I do it? I haven't had him yet!"

Before Edward could say anything, the rest of the boys burst out into conversation.

"That's a great idea Al! See, this is why he's in the cool group!"

"I wish my little brother wasn't so annoying! Al's so cool!

"Ed! We knew Al was cool, but you never told us that he did-- Hey, Ed? You okay?" Tim asked. Edward's eyes were cast away from everyone.

"I don't want Al to get in trouble…"

"I can do it," Alphonse replied defiantly. He didn't want Edward to treat him like a little kid. He wanted his big brother to respect him. "It's not that hard. He's a big evil stupid fat meanie jerkwad!"

Edward was silent. He was a bit shocked that Alphonse was using all of these "bad" words . Was he learning them all by him?

The bell rung for the younger classes to go to their next class. All of the big kids got to stay out for recess because it was the first day of school.

All of the boys cheered Alphonse on as he walked away from them. Edward only stared as his little brother walked away. He had a bad feeling about what as going to happen. But, seeing the determined look on little Al's face, he couldn't possibly ruin his brother's moment of pride.

~*~

Alphonse walked onto the small court that had been set up for exercises. On his way, he told a couple of his "peer" friends what he was going to do.

"But Al! What if you get in trouble?" Margaret asked. The other girls nodded with her.

"It won't matter, it's not like he can catch me!" Everyone around him laughed, and he figured that everything was set right.

"Hey, Al, we wanna do it too," said a boy walking next to Alphonse, David. The boys that followed David rubbed their hands together mischievously.

"The more the merrier!" Alphonse was now renewed with courage since everyone was going

Just then they all heard a voice behind them. "Everybody, stand on one of the numbers! We're going to start class immediately!" A dull, adult sat in a chair at the front. He was exactly as the older boys had depicted him. Very boring, and he didn't even seem nice.

Alphonse mainly drowned out his boring explanation of what their gym was going to be like, Edward had already told him about it.

"Okay, let's start with exercises. Jumping jacks. Ten everybody," the teacher droned.

Alphonse shot his hand up.

~*~

The older boys changed their sitting spot to near the fence, where they could see the gym class a bit more clearly.

"This is gonna be funny!" Lenny commented.

"I honestly think he's going to be too chicken to do it!" Harold said, snide.

Edward glared intensely at him. "My brother is not chicken. He'll do it!"

"Sure, whatever," Harold replied.

~*~

"Yes!? What!?"

Alphonse looked around to see who the teacher was looking at, and saw he was the only one who had put his hand up. He swallowed down a lump that had miraculously appeared in his throat.

"How do you do a jumping jack?"

The teacher's eyes nearly bore little holes through the back of his head.

"Whaddya mean how do ya do a jumpin jack!?"

"Well, how do you do a jumping jack?" Alphonse quietly replied. All of the other kids chuckled; the ones in the joke because of the coach's beet-red face, the others, because Alphonse was acting like an idiot.

"You wave your arms up and down while you jump! Like a snowman!"

"I still don't get it, sir."

"Somebody wanna show this kid how to do a jumpin' jack!?"

All of the children followed Alphonse at this point, because they all shook their heads in negation.

"C'MON! ARE YOU ALL THAT UNFIT!?"

"Sir, we would get it if you showed us," Alphonse mumbled.

The coach was at a loss. He stood up:

"Fine. I'll show you the routine for our jumping jacks." He then proceeded to bounce up and down like a ball, his arms flailing wildly.

All of the boys and girls on the court burst into laughter. Alphonse was trying to hide it, but laughter is contagious, and he started to go into a fit like the rest of them.

~*~

"Holy crud, he did it!" All of the boys cried in union. They laughed so hard their stomachs were hurting. Even Edward, who tried to keep a stiff lip, joined them, and eventually was rolling on the ground, gasping for air.

"Ed!"

A girl in Edward's class ran up to him. She had long, blonde hair, and blue eyes.

"What Winry?" Edward gasped with the last of his available breath.

"Isn't that Al who Principal Winthrow is taking away?"

Edward's head shot up, and he jumped up from the ground. The other boys followed him.

"Did Al get in trouble?" Tim asked.

"The coach probably got mad," Lenny answered, "so probably."

"Poor Al," Lenny mumbled.

"Why do I have a feeling this is your fault guys!?" Winry asked.

All of the boys held their heads down.

"It's my fault, Win," Edward said bluntly.

"Your faul--?" Edward ran off after the principal and Al. He could still see them across the field. Alphonse wasn't struggling or anything, as Edward would've done. Alphonse just quietly followed the principal.

"Hey! Wait!" Edward yelled, chasing after them.

"Is he nuts!?" One of the boys yelled.

Tim shrugged. "It's Al. He'd do it." The other boys nodded their heads in agreement.

"If you guys aren't going to do anything, then I will!" Winry said to them, then followed Ed, running as fast as her feet would take her.

~*~

"HEY!" Edward finally caught up to Al and the principal. Both turned to see him panting.

"Brother?"

"Edward, what are you doing here?"

Alphonse exchanged a look with Edward. Then, catching Edwards intention, said, "He didn't do anything! He's gonna blame himself! I did it! I did it! I did it! The teacher was a big fat meanie head, he deserved it!"

The principal was lost on words. It was usually the opposite; someone would be blaming someone else. But, she knew Alphonse pretty well, and figured someone else was behind it, but she had to make sure Alphonse didn't know that. "Of course it's your fault. Why else would I be bringing you to the office?"

"But, you're looking at Ed!

"That's because he wants to speak, Alphonse." Alphonse became quiet, but he still distrusted the woman.

Edward didn't know what to say, because Alphonse had basically beat him to it.

Luckily, stalling time, Winry ran up to the small group. Panting, she said, "Ma'am! Alphonse can't get in trouble…" she continued panting. Running across the whole field was tiring, especially when you're little. (SORRY ED!)

"How about this," the principal said, "we'll all go into my office and talk about it."

"Okay!" Winry and Ed exclaimed happily. Alphonse was silent.

The principal walked toward the schoolhouse, and further into the back where her office was. All three of the kids heard her saying things about the first day of school troubles under her breath. Ed and Winry walked on both sides of Alphonse. He looked over at Winry, who was smiling at him. He glared, and purposely looked the opposite direction. Edward made a grimace at Alphonse, mainly apologizing, and Alphonse glared at him. Finding no other direction to ignore Edward, he looked down.

~*~

"Alphonse did that!? Are you sure? That doesn't seem like something he would do," the woman replied to principal Winthrow.

"Oh, Ms. Elric, I never thought he did it. Of course, now the coach is blowing a vein, and says that Alphonse was the one who embarrassed him so badly."

"Winry and Edward are here too, did Alphonse tell them what happened?"

"I think they already knew, but Alphonse just shut up like a clam when we tried to talk, and the other two were uneasy, so whether or not he told them to not say anything I'm not sure."

"May I go talk to them?"

"It'd be my pleasure, Ms. Elric."

"Please, call me Trisha. And, thank you. I'm so sorry this happened. It's the first day of school too." Trisha walked into the back of the front office. She opened the door to Mrs. Winthrow's personal office, and walked in. "Alphonse, Edward, Winry, I'm here."

"Hi mom," the boys mumbled robotically.

"Hi Miss Elric!" Winry said more cheerfully.

"I heard about what happened. Alphonse, did you really do that?"

"Yes," Alphonse replied.

"Why?"

Alphonse was silent a moment, but then said:

"Well, the coach was mean, so I just thought he was a hyp…" he paused. "…a hypacreete."

"A hypocrite?"

"Mmhmm! He was a hypocrite. He wants us all to exercise and he's sitting in a chair, not doing anything at all!"

Trisha knew that her son was lying. It was pretty plain, Alphonse never lied, so it was a lot easier to detect. "That may be true Alphonse. In fact, you're right. But, you can't judge the hypocritical people yourself. You have to step aside and let the people who are higher up do it." Then, out of the blue, "Why would you lie to me Alphonse?"

He was shocked. "Momma…"

"Do you want to tell me? Or, should I ask Ed?" Ed looked enthusiastic, his head bouncing up and down.

"Do you want him to blame himself momma?"

"Alphonse!"

"He will though!"

Edward and Winry's heads moved from side to side as they watched Alphonse argue. "I'm getting dizzy…" Winry mumbled.

"Mom! Al!" Edward yelled, grabbing their attention. "Can I explain?" He added, "Please?"

Alphonse crossed his arms, but he really didn't want to argue with his mother further. "Please, Ed," his mother said.

"I thought of the idea with the guys. You know the guys, right?"

"Yes. Tim, Lenny, and everybody else, right?"

"Yep! Oh, anyway, well we thought the idea about the coach. It was me, actually, I'm the leader." Edward said this with a bit of pride. "But, we threw it out, since we can't ask him how to do jumping jacks, since we've already had him for a year. Then Al came, and asked us about it. He wanted to do it, and the guys agreed, so…"

"You didn't want it to happen? Just a joke?"

"Of course not! Honestly, I didn't want Al to look bad, or get in trouble. I honestly think Harold's little brother should've done it. He's pretty stupid, so it wouldn't look bad for him. It must run in the family…"

"Edward!"

Edward looked up to see his mom with her arms crossed, and a disappointed look on her face. The usually kind and giving mother was now upset, not a very pretty sight.

"I thought I taught you not to call others names, Edward. You wouldn't like it if Harold thought you were stupid."

"But I'm not, and he knows it."

Trisha sighed, and Edward felt guilty. "Sorry Mom, I won't do it again."

"Just finish your story Ed." Winry whispered, elbowing him in the ribs.

"Right. Al went off, and I felt bad, cause I didn't want him to get in trouble. He looked like he really wanted to do it though. Well, then the coach… he… well…" Edward was trying really hard not to laugh.

"I get it. And, since Alphonse so willingly did it, he got in trouble."

"Yep!" Winry answered. Then she looked over to the doorway. "Uh oh."

"What's the 'uh oh' for?" Edward asked. Winry pointed to the doorway. "Uh-huh. Uh oh."

Principal Winthrow was standing in the doorway, smiling.

"How much did you hear, ma'am?" Winry asked timidly.

"As much as I needed to. Now, isn't about time you boys went home? I think I've got the idea of what happened. You are dismissed from school for the rest of the day. You too, Winry."

"Really?" Edward asked excitedly.

"Fine with me," the principal replied.

"Let's go home then," Trisha said.

They were dismissed and headed home. The two boys ran ahead down the long road that was the final stretch to their house. The two girls paced behind.

"Al probably did it because he wanted Ed to think he was cool," Winry blurted.

Trisha looked down at her. "That was my guess. I love them, but sometimes…"

Winry giggled. "I know!"

~*~

(A couple of hours later)

"Hey, Al! I brought ice-cream!" Edward ran down to the side of the river where Alphonse was sitting.

"I didn't even tell you I was here," Alphonse replied, his knees hugged into his chest.

"I always know where you are! It's, like, older brother-psychic ability!"

"There's no such thing as psychic."

"Well, maybe somebody performed alchemy on me and made it so I have a Al radar!"

Edward pointed his finger out randomly, and rotated, making small beeping sounds. The closer he got to Alphonse, the louder he "beeped". "Found you!"

Alphonse laughed. "You're so silly big brother!"

"I know, cause I'm just awesome like that." Alphonse laughed even harder.

They both sat in silence for a moment, then it was broken by Edward.

"Hey, Al, why did you do that today?"

"I wanted you to think I was cool, like all of your other friends."

"Pee-shaw! You're awesome. You're the coolest little brother ever. Honestly, a heck of a lot better than the guys, and smarter too! "

"Big Brother!"