A/N: I needed something to take my mind of The Man Who Would Be King and I stumbled upon this song, My Old Friend by Tim McGraw and thought why not? It kind of just flowed out from there. I'm not sure what this is, but whatever right? Anyway if it sucks you can blame Ben Edlund who managed to make my heart incredibly damn happy and also fucking miserable all at the same time. Without further ado, read.

Disclaimer: They don't belong to me, not even a tiny little bit. Except the characters that are complete fabrications and have no actual place in SPN, I claim them.

Who Says You Can't Go Home?

Dean sat on the back porch of this big Victorian house with a white picket fence surrounding it and a fucking bike in the yard in suburbia and thought about how much his life was never meant to turn out like this, or at least he pretended it wasn't. Conjuring up how his 19 year old self would be giving him such hell if he could see him now. Granted he didn't live here, thank God, but Sammy did and as proud as he was of that damn braniac he couldn't help but wonder how he hadn't blown his brains out yet. A white picket fence, I mean, honestly that sealed the deal right there. It was just too suburban, too fancy, too normal. There was, of course, the fact that this house reminded him of someone he didn't really like to think about all that much, but nobody had to know that.

"Dean, you're in suburbia not hell, could you at least act like you are having a good time?" Sam interjected into his thoughts handing him a beer and sitting beside him on the marble steps outside.

"All those book smarts and you still can't see that this is hell, Sammy. Carmen just has you so whipped you don't even know it."

Sam sighed, "Dean, you live across the street in a house with a yard, a second story and even a pool and swing set in the backyard. Face it, jerk, you live in suburbia too and you are a cough and a hiccup from being me."

"Pshh, fat chance, bitch. And I only live anywhere close to this hellhole so Cassie can have some semblance of a normal life. I hear weirdos and girls like yourself enjoy these kinds of things," Dean smiled whispering the last part and smiling cheekily at his brother as he did so. Making fun of his little brother never got old. Some people thought it was weird, but it was how they worked. Tit for tat and all that jazzy crap or something, it is what brothers did. It didn't mean he didn't care about him, it meant the exact opposite.

"I get it. You are way too cool for something as mundane as a Sunday barbecue with people who love you. But you know what? I remember a time when all you wanted was to grow up and live in a nice house where everyone got together for dinner once a week and had barbecues all the time. I remember when you wanted a normal life so bad it was all you ever talked about. You can fool a lot of people with your attitude, Dean, but not me."

He sighed, shifting slightly in his seat as he responded, "Yeah, well things change."

And damn because Dean didn't like to think about that because he knew why he had wanted that. He knew who he, who him and Sammy and even Gabe had planned that future with. And even after ten years he missed that blue eyed freak that he had called his best friend more than he allowed himself to remember. Because remembering their friendship was like trying to remember what sunlight looked like if you lived in a place where it only ever rained. Pointless and depressing because it was not like remembering would do anything but bring up the painful feelings of what once was and what could have been.

"Dean."

"Sam, just don't. I'm fine, okay? I mean damn ten years later and now you want to talk about it?"

"I always wanted to talk about it, you always put it off. Sound familiar."

"What you mean you being a big girl and always for all the caring and sharing self-help mumbo jumbo crap? It does ring a few bells, but I said I'm fine so can you please just leave it alone."

"Why? Maybe talking will solve this."

"Solve what? I don't even really think about him...not anymore."

"Sure you don't. Which is why the picture in the center of the mantle in your living room, one of few pictures you have up that isn't me, Gabe, Jake, or Cassie, is one of you and Cas on graduation night. Or how about how you still have that trench coat that he left at our house junior year hidden behind the suits in your closet. How you go to church every Sunday rain or shine, but you have never really believed in God since Mom died. Or maybe I don't know because you named your freaking daughter after him."

"Grasping much? Her name is Cassandra."

"Are you serious? Are you really pretending that you coincidentally named your daughter the name that you called Cas when you wanted to piss him off for oh, about 13 years? Not to mention that it's about as close to Castiel as you can get without going for Castiella, which by the way I know you considered because Ellen told me she was going to shoot you if you asked her if she thought that was too weird a name one more time."

"So maybe, sometimes I miss the guy. And maybe I was keeping some stupid promise or whatever, but we were best friends from like five until eighteen, I'm pretty sure that's allowed."

"Yeah, Dean, it is. But going around and being an ass to everyone when they mention him isn't. I get that you miss him. Why don't you finally just talk to him? You were busy before, I know I get that and you had some epic fight before you left, Gabe told me, but your life is settled down now. Why not give him a call? After ten years I'm sure he doesn't even care about some stupid fight anymore. In fact he probably stopped caring the second you walked away. You always were his damn hero as much as his friend."

"No. I wasn't, anyway trust me he probably doesn't even care anymore."

"This is Castiel we're talking about. You don't really believe that."

And they sat like that for a moment looking at the kids in the yard. He caught sight of Jake swinging Cassie and smiled. Her bright green eyes shining in the sunlight, a tiny splotch of freckles that he couldn't see from his vantage point but that he knew were there sprinkled across her nose, dark hair spinning around her as she ran around laughing. They looked pretty perfect together. It was moments like this that he thought maybe things could work out with Jake after all. He loved Dean and he loved Cassie and maybe that was enough. And Cassie adored Jake, not as much as Papa Gabriel or Uncle Sammy, and she would probably be over the moon about Castiel, but she adored him just the same. And Cassie, well she was his everything. She had turned three years old last week and was so damn perfect that it made him want to cry. Another thing he wouldn't admit out loud, at least not to the sasquatch sitting next to him.

He thought about a time when he and Cas had promised to raise their kids together, they would live next door to each other with Sammy and Gabriel across the street, he purposely forgot that he had entertained the thought of Gabe and him having their own sort of happily ever after, and their kids would all be best friends and they would have this pathetic apple pie kind of life that Dean never really thought was possible with a mom that had died when he was barely old enough to remember and a dad that was never really around enough to make much of a difference. But somehow Cas had always had this freaky unyielding faith in him and something about it made Dean want to live up to these crazy expectations his friend had. The thought that Cas probably had kids and a wife of his own that he would never know kind of broke his heart. So Dean did what he had always done best when something was becoming emotionally compromising to him. He changed the subject.

"So how are you liking the new house? Personally, I think it's a little bit small for four people, but to each his own."

"Seriously? You are 28 with a child and still incapable of dealing with emotions like a proper human being? How the hell does Jake put up with you?"

"Don't think you really want the answer to that one, Sammy and you know how I feel about chick flick moments."

Sam pointedly ignored the first part of his response. Dean was right, he most definitely did not want to know whatever perverted crap was about to spew out of his brothers mouth. Instead he just sighed and said, "You have a daughter."

"Your point?"

"You know what, never mind. The house is great and spacious and you know Carmen and I want to have more kids one day so it won't seem too big in a few years."

"You do realize that you're 24 and have two kids already? I mean seriously, dude, how many more are we talking about? Because if you die I don't want to end up raising a football team or a small army, for that matter!"

"Well we could always choose Gabe as the Godfather in that case, I mean, if you think it is just too much for your delicate sensibilities."

"Hey, if you want your kids to turn out to be candy addicted pranksters who will probably end up in jail one day, fine, but don't you dare haunt my ass unless you are looking for an I told you so."

"Haha, besides he's not that bad. In fact, if I remember correctly you two did date that one summer in between sophomore and junior year did you not."

"I thought we agreed never to talk about that summer!" Dean growled, "It's all a blur, I'm pretty sure I was drugged or hypnotized or some shit to agree to go out with him."

"You're right, it had nothing to do with the major crush you had harbored on him since freshmen year when he stood up to that bully for calling you a hopeless case of white trash that wouldn't amount to anything, because I seem to remember you blushing every time him and Cas came over for a long time after that."

"I'm sorry, is there a point to this story?"

"Other than embarrassing you because we both know Gabe is coming to visit in two days, no not really," Sam smirked. He loved making fun of his brother and Gabe, mostly because he was pretty sure they still had a small thing for each other and also because, well reminding Dean that he was once a blushing little teenager was an opportunity he would never not seize. It was his brotherly duty, after all, and he took that very seriously.

"Such a little bitch, Sammy."

"And yet you love me."

"At this moment that's debatable," Dean shrugged feigning exasperation and looking back into the yard full of kids.

After a moment Sam continued, "Anyway, I talked to Gabe the other day."

"Uh-huh and did he confess his undying love for my incredibly handsome ass?"

"Well, your name and ass were mentioned in the same sentence, if that counts."

"A man after my own heart."

"Well, I hate to actually get serious here for a moment but he told me something that I've kind of been avoiding telling you because I know that it is going to upset you and I really don't know how you are going to react beyond that."

"Quit babbling and just spit it out."

"Okay, but you have to promise you won't shoot the messenger. Just promise you won't get mad at me."

And that stopped Dean short for a moment because he remembered uttering those exact words, well the last part anyway, to an eight year old Sam when he had realized that he liked boys as much as, well honestly more than, he liked girls. He remembers the fear that had gripped his heart and how his brother had just looked at him with wide innocent eyes and told him he didn't see the big deal. That love was love and that was the only thing that mattered. Somehow he doubted that was where this particular conversation was headed though.

Dean sighed, "Okay."

Sam rolled his eyes, "That's not a promise, Dean."

"How can I promise I won't get mad when I don't even know what the fuck you are going to say? I won't get mad at you, though."

Somehow Sam wasn't entirely convinced of that, but he continued anyway, "I guess that's good enough."

Sam stopped for a moment, a twinge of fear and uncertainty coursing through him. He wasn't really sure how to tell Dean this without just flat out saying it. He wasn't sure whether his brother would see this as good or bad news. He wanted to believe it meant that their life could go back to normal, or what had been normal until Dean left and everything changed. He didn't know if he should consider it weird that his version of normal was something over ten years old, something that had been missing for most of his teenage and all of his adult life. Was it weird that he had never felt truly at home since he was fourteen and his days were spent following around Dean, Gabriel, and Castiel on pointless adventures. It wasn't that he didn't love his wife and kids, he did, but he felt like a part of him and Dean had disappeared the summer Dean went to California, Gabriel went to New Mexico, and Castiel went to Harvard. It was like his heart would never be complete until they were all together again, forming this cohesive unit like they had so many years ago. He didn't know if they could go back to what they once were, but he knew he wanted to try. He thought he knew Dean and Gabe did too. Castiel, however, well he hadn't talked to the guy since he was fourteen, so who the hell knew what he wanted, aside from Gabriel and Sam never really had the heart to ask. For Dean's sake mostly, because he knew he would have to tell his brother whatever Gabriel said, and he didn't know if Dean could take hearing that Castiel had completely moved on with his life, that he hadn't spared a thought for his brother in those ten long years. He doubted that would be the case, but he didn't think his brother could take it if it was. He must have been contemplating all this for a long time because soon Dean's rough voice broke him out of his thoughts.

"Well, are we going to sit here forever or do you actually plan on telling me whatever this is before my kid graduates college?"

Sam took a deep breath and for some reason said, "Gabriel is moving back."

Dean eyed him suspiciously, "Yeah, I know, kind of why we are picking him up from the airport in two days and moving him into the house around the corner."

"Oh, yeah."

"Dude, stop stalling and just spit it out because something tells me that is not at all what you were about to say."

This time he found his nerve, but only in a whisper, "Castiel is coming back to Lawrence."

He almost hoped that he hadn't heard when Dean stuttered for a few minutes before he managed to say, "I'm sorry, what?" but he wasn't yelling so Sam took that as a good sign.

"Gabriel didn't tell me the details all he said was that Cas missed home and has taken a teaching job at some local college where he can still have enough free time to write his books and be with his family."

Dean's jaw tensed and Sam knew that was a sign he was holding in an outburst, "Why didn't Gabe tell me, that?"

Sam whispered again, he wasn't sure why, but he thought a gentle approach was best at the moment, "He thought you'd take it easier coming from me."

"Easier? So the guy that used to be my best friend just happens to be moving back to the town I live in now, with his family and we haven't spoken or seen each other in ten years. How the hell is that easier coming from anybody?"

"I don't know, Dean. I'm sorry, I know you weren't expecting this, but maybe it's what you need. You know, an excuse to see him, a chance to fix things."

"Sam, things aren't broken! They don't need fixing!" Dean said raising his voice, but keeping his composure. His daughter was out there after all, he didn't want her to worry and she was too young to understand that Daddy being upset meant more than just Daddy needed mending and as much as he adored Jake, he had a tendency to try and pry chick flick moments out of him as much as Sam did and he really didn't think this was a conversation he wanted to have with his boyfriend at the moment. Especially when said boyfriend was already apprehensive about Gabriel visiting and he didn't even know he was moving back, so he wasn't really looking forward to the massively headache inducing conversation he was sure to follow when he told him his ex-boyfriend and his ex-best friend were going to both be in Lawrence again.

"Okay, okay, look I guess we just talk about it more later, just relax before Carm comes over here and kicks the crap out of me for upsetting her favorite brother-in-law."

He thought he heard Dean mutter something about only brother-in-law before he took a deep steadying breath and seemed to actually heed his advice. After a few minutes he spoke in a much calmer, almost small voice.

"Why is coming back?"

"I told you Gabe said something about missing home and wanting his kids to be raised where he was. I don't really know I kind of didn't hear anything after Cas is coming back to Lawrence, anyway."

"I just don't get why, though."

Did his brother ever listen to him? He sighed, "Dean, I just said—"

"No, I mean, he's a world famous author, he could live anywhere he wanted to so why here?"

Sam rolled his eyes at his brother, "This coming from the world famous rock star who just so happens to be in the Hall of Fame that lives across the street."

Dean sighed, "That's different."

"Oh really? And how is that?"

"I came back three and a half years ago when I found out Maria was pregnant. I came back so I could raise my daughter in a safe place instead of having her on a tour bus every night. Her mother ran off and left a rock star to raise her, I had to give her some kind of stability."

"And I'm proud of you for doing the right thing, Dean. I am. And I can see how happy you are at the record store, how happy you are with Jake and with Cassie running around, but the reason you came back, to raise your daughter in a place where you were safe and comfortable and happy as a child, well sounds like why Cas is coming back too."

Dean sighed. He knew Sammy was right. Damn he hated it when that kid was right, it was so much more fun to shove it in his face when he was wrong. And he didn't know how he felt about Cas coming back to Lawrence. He didn't want to face him again and have to remember why they stopped being friends. Didn't want to look in his eyes and see the distaste that had colored their last meeting.

"When is he coming back?"

"Umm, you know I think Friday, so about five days."

"Damn, Gabriel. I'm going to kick his ass when I see him, how could he not tell me? If he's coming in five days he's obviously been planning it for a while. You don't up and move in five days. Not when you have a family to think about."

"He didn't want you to unnecessarily freak out."

"I don't think this is unnecessary."

"Look, Gabe may be your friend/ex/whatever the hell he is, but he is still Cas' brother, his big brother. It's possible he was trying to look out for both of you, because as much as you like to pretend you hate each others guts, I know you still care about him and for whatever reason he still cares about you too."

Dean coughed another question forming, one he was a little scared to ask, but one he had to know, "Does he know I live here?"

"Dean the whole world knows you live here. You're world famous, remember, I'm sure Cas read it in the paper before now."

Dean rolled his eyes, "You know he doesn't keep up with that kind of thing. He hates pop culture...or he used to, anyway."

"If he didn't I'm sure Gabriel told him, Dean. He knows you live here."

"Okay, well this is getting freakishly close to a chick flick moment so can we, I don't know, stop talking about?"

Sam leaned back on the stairs watching Carmen carry a sleeping Michael around as Johnny chased Cassie around with a frog and laughed. Something told him everything was going to turn out alright, he just hoped whatever that something was was right, "I know, soon we'll be watching Lifetime and obsessing over science fiction shows."

Dean snorted, but leaned back to relax as well, "You so much as try and get me near one of those things and I will end you."

"Not if I have a gun full of rock salt and some holy water."

"You watch too much Supernatural, dude."

"Don't pretend you don't love it. Why wouldn't you that Jensen character is exactly like you."

"Oh you think so, huh? How many angels named Misha have I married and then had some weird half angel half human baby with?"

Sam threw his head back and laughed, "Ah-ha, I knew you watched it!"

He glared, "You are so not funny, Samantha!"

"I'm actually quite hilarious. Funniest angel in the garrison and all that." Sam winched as Dean punched him in the arm. They both sat there relaxing and enjoying the silence for a little bit longer before Dean finally whispered.

"So, Cas has a family, huh?"

"Twins, apparently. A boy and a girl. No wife, though, maybe something happened to her, I don't know Gabriel didn't say. Just said Cas and his kids were moving back."

"So the Winchesters and the Novaks back in Lawrence again, huh? Think it's a sign of the impending Apocalypse?"

"Oh, definitely."

And Dean wasn't really sure how this whole thing was going to go, all he knew was that he was glad Sam, Jake, and Gabe would be there for him when this whole thing came to a head and someone locked him and Cas in a room and forced them to talk. Looks like Lawrence just got a whole lot more interesting.

What the hell is this? I asked myself the same question, but hey my fingers typed and I wrote and this is what happened. It was meant to be a one shot, but kind of turned into a full blown story, the song will come into play eventually, I know how but not when I will get to it. Also pointing out this story was meant to be Cas/Dean friendship (and it still is) but somehow Dean/Gabriel slash crept in here and then Dean already has a boyfriend named Jake (who I will describe in more detail later) and I don't really know if this is going to end up Dabriel or Destiel or what so for now I'm just going with it and seeing where these characters take me. Would love to hear your thoughts on this story so far so please review!