So, I was working on the next chapter of "Eternity" while working on a one-act play for creative writing based off of Kokoro (don't sue me, Toraboruta_P!), and I thought to myself, 'Geez, this is way too depressing.' So, I, in my infinate wisdom, decided to create ANOTHER story. Despite the fact that I should be working on one of my collabs, OR even my poor, neglected Elysion story. I apologize to anyone who is waiting on me, and hope you don't hate me too bad! So, here's the start of my newest story, "Just Ask Ongaku-sama!"

"I. Am. So. Flipping. Boooooooored!"

The only answer I got was my own voice echoing back to me. Damn, is this what being home alone felt like? It sucked! No wonder Len anways complained whenever I went out shopping with Miku or something!

Okay, I'm just kidding. Len never complained. He was too nice for that. Bastard.

"Dammit. Dammit. Dammit." Yeah, I know cursing got me nowhere, but hey! It gave me something to do, at least. "Stupid mom, having to work all the time. Stupid Miku, too busy to hang out. Stupid Len, out with friends." Notice that dad was not included on my list of morons. That's because he's out of the picture. I don't like talking about it, got it? So don't ask.

"I can't believe I'm stuck at home, alone, on a Friday night!" What with all of my friends being busy, I was completely bored. I had planned on spending the day with Len, but nooo, he already had plans to go out to the movies with Kaito and some other friends! After I made those special plans for him!

Okay. Maybe I didn't exactly tell him about these plans. But he was my twin, and my best friend! He should totally make time for me, right? Right?

"Right. This is all shota-kun's fault." I flopped onto the bed I shared with Len, looking at the empty space that should have been occupied by him. For all of you perverts in the back, the ones going 'ZOMG TWINCEST,' let me straighten you out right now. Len and I are not together, nor have we ever been. You sick, sick people. Why would you think either of us would want that? We're twins, okay? That is totally, completely wrong...

But you are totally, completely right. I want it. Shut up, it's not my fault that he's, like, perfect!

Anyways, I'm totally losing track of the story. Gah, I even switched tenses! How the hell am I going to become a famous writer if I keep doing crap like this? Okay, anyways...

I sat in bed for a few minutes, resisting the urge to slam my head against the wall or something. Eventually, I went into the kitchen and got an orange. I hadn't done anything but eat since Len left, but whatever, there was nothing better to do! Peeling the orange, I plopped down infront of the computer, typing in my favorite web adress: . It was this new website, and it was filled with blogs for anyone and anything. You got the witty people who resored your hope in humanity, along with the retards who killed it.

I really, really wanted to write a blog. But whining about my life would be boring, right? I wanted to do something special with mine, but I didn't know what. A poet? Nah, no one would read that. I needed something... interactive... Something that I could...

"Ah!" I nearly dropped my orange when I thought of it. I had a sudden thought about the advice columnist on the school newspaper. It was called "Dear Whisper-sama," except everyone knew that "Whisper-sama" was really just Neru. How the hell that stupid bitch got on an advice column, I'd never know. I mean, this is how one of her columns went.

"Dear Whisper-sama,

My boyfriend broke up with me last month. Since then, I cry constantly and I'm really depressed. What should I do?

From,
Upset

Dear Upset,

Punch him and move on. Quit whining.

From,
Whisper-sama"

I am not even fricking exaggerating. Anyways, Yamaha High needed a new advice columnist, and I was just the girl to do it. I mean, my advice was totally awesome, right? Right.

Making an account wasn't difficult, until it came to choosing a username. What should it be? Orenji-sama? No, too many people knew about my orange obsession. I needed something... AHA! If I did something related to music, no one would know it was me! My school was filled with music nerds. In fact, we were a special school made to train the world's next big stars. And we still had to do Algebra. What a load of shit.

Quickly, I typed "Ongaku-sama" into the username box, and soon I was ready to type up my very first post.

Hey. You're all probably looking at this, wondering who the hell I am. Well, tough. I'm not telling you. I mean, come on. You could be some 60-year-old pervert for all I know! Do you think I'm just gonna tell you my name and school and all that? Psh, think again.

You may adress me as Ongaku-sama. Why "sama," you ask? BECAUSE I AM YOUR SUPERIOR. DEAL WITH IT. I'm an average high school student, with-Fuck, that's boring. I mean, who wants to read a blog about some average high school girl? Sick perverts who get off on that stuff, that's who. If you are one of those, then go away. Now.

Anyways. I guess on the surface, I AM a normal high school girl. However, that's far from true. You might notice that I'm using proper spelling and punctuation (or, at least, I hope I am; my internet doesn't have spell check). This does not contain 1337, or any txt tlk. This should make me stand out from the crowd. The other reason that I'm different is that I'm NOT here for me. I'm here for you.

That's right, I'm your own personal online advice columnist. Send me a message (you don't need to have an account to do that), and check back on this blog for the answers. I might occasionally rant or whatever, but this will mostly be an advice column. I'm checking this thing every morning, and I'll update whenever I have at least three messages.

Adios,
Ongaku-sama

I smirked, looking at my handywork. Okay, it wasn't Shakespere or anything, but I thought it was pretty good. Afterwords, I sent a quick e-mail to all of my friends (cryptonblogs had this fancy emailing system). In a flash of inspiration, I sent it to myself. Now no one would suspect me.

To: tehnumbah1diva, icecreamisawesome, lukalukanightfever, kasaneterritory4eva, bananaboy, illdriveyouflat, and 27 others

From: ongakusama

You might be wondering who I am. Don't worry, I'm a friend. Check out my blog at .

Suddenly, I heard the door slam. "Rin? I'm home!" Quickly, I hit send and shut off the computer. Len walked in. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing!" There was no way Len could find out what I was doing! That would ruin all the fun!

Len looked at me suspiciously. "... Were you reading yaoi fanfiction again?"

"W-What? No!" Oh, come on! It was one time...

Len smirked. "Whatever. I'm gonna go make dinner." He walked out of our room. I smacked my head on the computer desk. I yelled after him.

"Len Kagamine, you are an asshole!" Hearing him chuckle from down the hall, I rolled my eyes and mumbled under my breath, "Why the hell do I love you?"

Gah. I don't think this is very good. It'll probably get updated fairly slowly. Definatly NOT a priority. Unless you guys want it to be? Iunno, go ahead and tell me in a reveiw~!