Guinea Pig's Lament
by BrDPirateMan
Disclaimer: I own neither The World Ends With You nor Portal 2, nor any of the characters from both of these games. Apologies to Jonathan Coulton.
(sung to the tune of "Want You Gone" by Jonathan Coulton from Portal 2)
You have your fetishes
Of clothes and threads and such
But why must I get dragged
In with you too
You don't know when to stop
Teasing my fashion sense
I know it's nothing great
But wouldn't you leave it alone?
Please be more open-minded
That's what I'm counting on
Hate it when you start rambling
Now I only want you gone
…
How did it come to this?
I don't know how this happened
You had to dress me up
Now I'm a fool
A walking laughingstock
That's what you've made me into
What made you think that I
Look great in puffy dresses
End my torture already
That's what I'm counting on
I may be forgiving but
Now I only want you gone
…
I pray to every faith
It doesn't help at all
I am convinced
That gods do not exist
I wouldn't put on that dress
Don't bring that any closer
You love cross-dressing
But that doesn't mean that I do
I wish you'd get amnesia
That's what I'm counting on
But that's just wishful thinking
Now I only want you gone
…
It truly is a pain
To be placed at your mercy
I'm like a slave
To be used at your whim
It is impossible
To stay mad at you though
My soft spot for you
Is why I'm still holding on
At least give me men's clothing
That's what I'm counting on
Sadly that's not an option
Now I only want you gone
Now I only want you gone
Now I only want you…
…gone.
…
P.S. Shiki, when I say I want you gone, I don't mean it. Of course I still love you. Just… leave me alone for a bit, okay? Only for a bit. But for goodness' sake keep those girly clothes away from me. I'd hate to cream you. With lemons.
Author's note: You can easily find the video for the song "Want You Gone" with any good search engine. Listen to it and enjoy!