DON'T LET ME GET ME ~CHAPTER 1~
A/N: Hey people! Sup? Ok…this is a fic. about Hermione. It's a bit disturbing at the end which is why is at the PG-13 rating. It also has a small amount of language. Ok, that was just my warning. Okay. I just wanted to tell you NOW, but this is NOT the ending. There WILL be another chapter!! I am writing it as you read this. I just wanted to let you know so that when you finish you don't think that I am a messed up person who needs some help. lol The reason I am writing this is b/c I've been feeling a bit depressed lately and I don't want to act on it like someone else did…read and find out what I'm talking about…and so I wrote this hoping it will make me feel better… But, w/e ok. Once again…THERE WILL BE A FOLLOWING CHAPTER SO DON'T STOP READING!!! Ok…..please r/r It will make me feel sooooo much better! Oh, and this fic. Is based on Pink's new song, Don't Let Me Get Me….If you haven't heard it…download it now cuz it's a great song!! Ok…so here it is:
Disclaimer: The only thing that belongs to me if the basic plot. The song is Pink's and w/e her record company is and the characters belong to the one and only JK Rowling
*******************************************************************
The sound of a door slamming echoed throughout Gryffindor tower. And, had it not been for a quick silencing charm, the sound of a girl sobbing would have also been heard. This girl was the one and only Hermione Granger. Extremely thankful for the privacy of her own room, Hermione laid face down on top of her bed.
'I feel so dirty, so violated…how could he?' She thought.
That night had to have been the worst night she had ever had in her entire young life. Tonight, was the night she had discovered the man whom she had thought loved her as much as she loved him, with someone else.
*****************************Flashback*******************************
It had been a night, much like any other. Hermione Granger had quietly slipped down the stairs that led to her room and slithered out of the dark common room, just as she had been doing for the past two months. Quiet as a mouse, she walked down the various stairways to the cold dungeon, where she had stood clutching her bathrobe around her self when she thought she heard footsteps. Quickly, she ducked into an empty classroom, just as Filch turned the corner muttering something to Mrs. Norris.
"That Peeves, we'll get him this time, my sweet, yes we will. To think that he could steal that painting and switch it around without my noticing! He knows perfectly well that Sir Cadogan can't be there! Talks too much, he does! Annoys all the other paintings! Yes, my pet, we'll surely have him this time…" Hermione could hear him as he passed the slightly open door. She couldn't help but breath a small giggle at the thought of the crazy knight that she, and her two best friends, Harry Potter and Ron Weasley, had encountered during their third year and the painting that had later guarded the opening to Gryffindor tower during the time when Sirius Black had slashed the Fat Lady's picture.
Careful to avoid the noisy painting, Hermione slipped down the dark stairs and turned down the dreary hall that led to her lover's classroom. Tip-toeing so that she could surprise him, she slid closer and closer to the room. Then she heard it. Stopping and frowning slightly, she heard a soft moaning coming from down the hall.
'He wouldn't…no. It couldn't be him.' She thought reassuring herself. Maybe some other teacher was getting some action. Or maybe he couldn't wait till she got there and had to resort to pleasuring himself… She laughed silently to herself at the thoughts.
She crept closer and as she did the moaning got louder. Stupidly, she continued and quietly opened the door, revealing the image that would forever be sketched into her mind. It was Severus Snape, HER Severus Snape, and he wasn't alone. Hermione watched, horror stricken as her lover slid slowly in and out of another, she couldn't even tell whom it was. Finally snapping out of her shock, Hermione uttered a sob and fled, hot tears streaming down her face.
**************************End Flashback*****************************
Never win first place
I don't support the team
I can't take direction and my socks are never clean
Teachers dated me
My parents hated me
I was always in a fight cuz I can't do nothing right
She had given so much up for him. Despite the fact that she was Head Girl, Hermione knew that her grades were slipping. She wasn't as top-notch as she had been during the previous years. She spent every free moment with him. She rarely went to any of the Quidditch games and had seen less and less of Harry, Ron, and Ginny. Since the relationship had started at the end of her sixth year, Hermione had snuck away many times from her house to see and be with him. She continued this despite the many times her parents caught her. Her parents no longer trusted their only daughter. They had no idea what was happening to her. She wasn't as focused anymore. This was because Hermione spent every minute of everyday daydreaming about the escapades that she and Severus would do that evening. Her friends had backed off because Hermione got incredibly moody if her daydreams were interrupted or she went a day with out touching, feeling Severus (not that they knew the reason for her moodiness). How…how could he do this to her? She had loved him. She had thought he loved her.
Hermione slowly got up and walked to her adjoining bathroom. She knew what she needed; she needed a nice long hot bath. Hermione looked around her beautiful and spacious bathroom. It was definitely one of the biggest perks of being Head Girl. It was white and silver, and shaped like a dome. The walls were a white tile that had pretty silver swirls on it. There was a large bath that was like an Olympic sized pool, only a bit bigger than the Prefect's bath. There was also a number of shower stalls, each with a different kind of scent. On the far side of the room, there was a long, full-length mirror that took up most of the wall. Hermione walked over to the mirror. She looked at the girl she saw, the girl with the puffy red eyes and the messed up hair. She looked at the girl who was no longer innocent, in fact, far from it. Who was this girl? It certainly wasn't the brilliant and perfect Hermione that everyone had come to know. This girl- no- this monster that was staring back her…had she really become this person? Suddenly disgusted by the person she saw in the mirror, Hermione quickly turned away.
1 Everyday I fight a war against the mirror
I can't take the person starin' back at me
I'm a hazard to myself
Don't let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
It's bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don't wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
I wanna be somebody else, yeah
Hermione's eyes slowly welled up with tears once again. She missed her friends.
'Oh…Harry…Ron…Ginny...What have I done to our friendship? I never see you anymore. They all probably hate me. I hate me. '
Hermione thought back to one of the many girl-to-girl conversations she had had with Ginny. Ginny, although a year younger, had truly become one of Hermione's greatest friends. She had been always there to lend an ear to listen to Hermione's problems, worries, or just random babbles. She had even stayed loyal when Hermione was so cruel to her…
*********************************Flashback**************************
"Oh Hermione, your so lucky!" Ginny told her friend as she sat on the other girl's bed watching Hermione model dresses.
"Me? Lucky? Why?" Hermione asked with a trace of laughter creeping into her voice. She and Ginny were in Hermione's Prefect bedroom. There was another Yule Ball at Hogwarts this year and Harry, Ron, Dean, Neville and many others had asked Hermione. Knowing that Ginny was still smitten over the great Harry Potter, Hermione had graciously said no to his offer after hinting that maybe Ginny would be a better choice. Harry, understanding that Hermione had dejected him because of her friendship with Ginny, had asked her to the ball the following day. Hermione had decided to go with Ron, because she honestly had no feelings for any of the other boys and since Ron was one of her best friends…
"Oh Hermione, stop being modest! You know perfectly well why. I would give anything to be like you. I mean, who wouldn't? Your like a genius, your gorgeous, your popular, you can do anything you want to, once you're out of Hogwarts. You could be a model…or you could even be the Minister of Magic if you wanted to!"
Hermione just laughed. "Gosh Ginny, you make me sound as if I'm the next Ms. Universe!"
"Ms. Universe…who's that? Is she a witch?" Ginny asked Hermione, confused.
"Never mind…but really Ginny, that's what you think? But thanks for the compliments. I'm not really 'gorgeous' am I?" Hermione teased as she struck a silly pose, "I could be a model…well, your right…who could resist putting this face on the cover of a magazine?!" Hermione began strutting around the room as if she were on a runway. Ginny rolled off the bed collapsing into a fit of laughter.
"Stop it 'Mione…I can't breath!" Ginny managed between giggles. Hermione suddenly turned serious.
"Ya know Gin, you're like my best friend. I mean, Harry and Ron are my best friends too, but I can't talk to them like this. And I just wanted to say 'thanks'"
"Aww Herm! That's so sweet! You're my best friend too! You're like a big sister to me!" Ginny said getting up from the floor. The two girls looked at each other teary eyed and gave each other a quick hug.
"Okay...I think we need to finish this other job..." Hermione stated.
"What job?"
"Ok…which dress, and which eye shadow?" Hermione asked.
*******************************End Flashback*************************
2 LA told me: "You'll be a pop star All you have to change
Is everything you are"
Stop being compared
To damn Britney Spears
She's so pretty
That just ain't me
Hermione smiled at the memory. She felt an ache and realized how much she truly missed her friends.
'But they probably don't miss you. All you've been towards them is a big bitch. How could they ever forgive you? You aren't worth it.'
Hermione heard the voice in the back of her head. She had no other choice but to believe it. After all, if a man whom everybody hates manages to break your heart and cheat on you, what's going to happen when a man whom everyone loves comes along? She'd be gone in a second. How she wished that she were someone else. Ginny maybe. Yes, Ginny. Ginny was always so carefree, and she was happily with Harry. Harry would never ever cheat on someone. He was too noble, not to mention the fact that Ron would punch in his face if he ever hurt his little sister… How much Hermione wished she could be Ginny right now.
Doctor, doctor won't you please prescribe somthin'
A day in the life of someone else?
Cuz I'm a hazard to myself
Don't let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
It's bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don't wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
'Don't kid yourself Herm…You could never be like Ginny, not now anyways.'
Hermione thought back to the old Hermione, the genius, the beauty, the perfect student…How she missed that Hermione.
'But she's gone, and she's not comin' back. She can't come back…'
Doctor, doctor won't you please prescribe somthin'
A day in the life of someone else?
Cuz I'm a hazard to myself
Don't let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
It's bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don't wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
Hermione turned back to the reflection. It hadn't changed at all during the last couple minutes, but it had changed so much from the girl Hermione wanted to be. She couldn't even recognize her anymore. She suddenly couldn't take it. Before she knew what she was doing, Hermione reached her fist back and punched the mirror and that ugly reflection as hard as she could. The mirror shattered.
'Life just isn't worth living anymore. I hate myself. My friends hate me. Just forget everything!'
Hermione reached down and grabbed one of the larger and shaper pieces of broken glass. Taking one more look at her doomed reflection, Hermione took a deep breath and dug the sharp edge into her wrist, feeling the burning pain when she lifted it up.
'Don't stop now, it isn't worth it! Do the other wrist! Do the other wrist!'
She heard the evil voice in her head say. Without another thought, Hermione slit the other wrist, and as the blood flowed freely out of the two large gashes, and Hermione's head began to spin, one last thought popped into her dying head.
'Why Hermione, why? You are a great person! Nobody hates you. Despite the cruel things you've done, each and every one of your friends loves you. So why?'
I'm my own worst enemy
It's bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don't wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
Hermione began to regret the rash decision she had made. But she knew that only a miracle could save her now. The dizziness was greater now, all thoughts dyed away as Hermione fell to the ground. But as she took a last breath, she heard the door fling open and one word spoken…"Hermione!"
A/N: I'm not gonna say much…all I'm gonna say is THERE WILL BE A NEXT CHAPTER!!! I'm not gonna leave Hermione like this…It should be up soon… Ok…please review- it will make me feel better!!! Love ya!
A/N: Hey people! Sup? Ok…this is a fic. about Hermione. It's a bit disturbing at the end which is why is at the PG-13 rating. It also has a small amount of language. Ok, that was just my warning. Okay. I just wanted to tell you NOW, but this is NOT the ending. There WILL be another chapter!! I am writing it as you read this. I just wanted to let you know so that when you finish you don't think that I am a messed up person who needs some help. lol The reason I am writing this is b/c I've been feeling a bit depressed lately and I don't want to act on it like someone else did…read and find out what I'm talking about…and so I wrote this hoping it will make me feel better… But, w/e ok. Once again…THERE WILL BE A FOLLOWING CHAPTER SO DON'T STOP READING!!! Ok…..please r/r It will make me feel sooooo much better! Oh, and this fic. Is based on Pink's new song, Don't Let Me Get Me….If you haven't heard it…download it now cuz it's a great song!! Ok…so here it is:
Disclaimer: The only thing that belongs to me if the basic plot. The song is Pink's and w/e her record company is and the characters belong to the one and only JK Rowling
*******************************************************************
The sound of a door slamming echoed throughout Gryffindor tower. And, had it not been for a quick silencing charm, the sound of a girl sobbing would have also been heard. This girl was the one and only Hermione Granger. Extremely thankful for the privacy of her own room, Hermione laid face down on top of her bed.
'I feel so dirty, so violated…how could he?' She thought.
That night had to have been the worst night she had ever had in her entire young life. Tonight, was the night she had discovered the man whom she had thought loved her as much as she loved him, with someone else.
*****************************Flashback*******************************
It had been a night, much like any other. Hermione Granger had quietly slipped down the stairs that led to her room and slithered out of the dark common room, just as she had been doing for the past two months. Quiet as a mouse, she walked down the various stairways to the cold dungeon, where she had stood clutching her bathrobe around her self when she thought she heard footsteps. Quickly, she ducked into an empty classroom, just as Filch turned the corner muttering something to Mrs. Norris.
"That Peeves, we'll get him this time, my sweet, yes we will. To think that he could steal that painting and switch it around without my noticing! He knows perfectly well that Sir Cadogan can't be there! Talks too much, he does! Annoys all the other paintings! Yes, my pet, we'll surely have him this time…" Hermione could hear him as he passed the slightly open door. She couldn't help but breath a small giggle at the thought of the crazy knight that she, and her two best friends, Harry Potter and Ron Weasley, had encountered during their third year and the painting that had later guarded the opening to Gryffindor tower during the time when Sirius Black had slashed the Fat Lady's picture.
Careful to avoid the noisy painting, Hermione slipped down the dark stairs and turned down the dreary hall that led to her lover's classroom. Tip-toeing so that she could surprise him, she slid closer and closer to the room. Then she heard it. Stopping and frowning slightly, she heard a soft moaning coming from down the hall.
'He wouldn't…no. It couldn't be him.' She thought reassuring herself. Maybe some other teacher was getting some action. Or maybe he couldn't wait till she got there and had to resort to pleasuring himself… She laughed silently to herself at the thoughts.
She crept closer and as she did the moaning got louder. Stupidly, she continued and quietly opened the door, revealing the image that would forever be sketched into her mind. It was Severus Snape, HER Severus Snape, and he wasn't alone. Hermione watched, horror stricken as her lover slid slowly in and out of another, she couldn't even tell whom it was. Finally snapping out of her shock, Hermione uttered a sob and fled, hot tears streaming down her face.
**************************End Flashback*****************************
Never win first place
I don't support the team
I can't take direction and my socks are never clean
Teachers dated me
My parents hated me
I was always in a fight cuz I can't do nothing right
She had given so much up for him. Despite the fact that she was Head Girl, Hermione knew that her grades were slipping. She wasn't as top-notch as she had been during the previous years. She spent every free moment with him. She rarely went to any of the Quidditch games and had seen less and less of Harry, Ron, and Ginny. Since the relationship had started at the end of her sixth year, Hermione had snuck away many times from her house to see and be with him. She continued this despite the many times her parents caught her. Her parents no longer trusted their only daughter. They had no idea what was happening to her. She wasn't as focused anymore. This was because Hermione spent every minute of everyday daydreaming about the escapades that she and Severus would do that evening. Her friends had backed off because Hermione got incredibly moody if her daydreams were interrupted or she went a day with out touching, feeling Severus (not that they knew the reason for her moodiness). How…how could he do this to her? She had loved him. She had thought he loved her.
Hermione slowly got up and walked to her adjoining bathroom. She knew what she needed; she needed a nice long hot bath. Hermione looked around her beautiful and spacious bathroom. It was definitely one of the biggest perks of being Head Girl. It was white and silver, and shaped like a dome. The walls were a white tile that had pretty silver swirls on it. There was a large bath that was like an Olympic sized pool, only a bit bigger than the Prefect's bath. There was also a number of shower stalls, each with a different kind of scent. On the far side of the room, there was a long, full-length mirror that took up most of the wall. Hermione walked over to the mirror. She looked at the girl she saw, the girl with the puffy red eyes and the messed up hair. She looked at the girl who was no longer innocent, in fact, far from it. Who was this girl? It certainly wasn't the brilliant and perfect Hermione that everyone had come to know. This girl- no- this monster that was staring back her…had she really become this person? Suddenly disgusted by the person she saw in the mirror, Hermione quickly turned away.
1 Everyday I fight a war against the mirror
I can't take the person starin' back at me
I'm a hazard to myself
Don't let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
It's bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don't wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
I wanna be somebody else, yeah
Hermione's eyes slowly welled up with tears once again. She missed her friends.
'Oh…Harry…Ron…Ginny...What have I done to our friendship? I never see you anymore. They all probably hate me. I hate me. '
Hermione thought back to one of the many girl-to-girl conversations she had had with Ginny. Ginny, although a year younger, had truly become one of Hermione's greatest friends. She had been always there to lend an ear to listen to Hermione's problems, worries, or just random babbles. She had even stayed loyal when Hermione was so cruel to her…
*********************************Flashback**************************
"Oh Hermione, your so lucky!" Ginny told her friend as she sat on the other girl's bed watching Hermione model dresses.
"Me? Lucky? Why?" Hermione asked with a trace of laughter creeping into her voice. She and Ginny were in Hermione's Prefect bedroom. There was another Yule Ball at Hogwarts this year and Harry, Ron, Dean, Neville and many others had asked Hermione. Knowing that Ginny was still smitten over the great Harry Potter, Hermione had graciously said no to his offer after hinting that maybe Ginny would be a better choice. Harry, understanding that Hermione had dejected him because of her friendship with Ginny, had asked her to the ball the following day. Hermione had decided to go with Ron, because she honestly had no feelings for any of the other boys and since Ron was one of her best friends…
"Oh Hermione, stop being modest! You know perfectly well why. I would give anything to be like you. I mean, who wouldn't? Your like a genius, your gorgeous, your popular, you can do anything you want to, once you're out of Hogwarts. You could be a model…or you could even be the Minister of Magic if you wanted to!"
Hermione just laughed. "Gosh Ginny, you make me sound as if I'm the next Ms. Universe!"
"Ms. Universe…who's that? Is she a witch?" Ginny asked Hermione, confused.
"Never mind…but really Ginny, that's what you think? But thanks for the compliments. I'm not really 'gorgeous' am I?" Hermione teased as she struck a silly pose, "I could be a model…well, your right…who could resist putting this face on the cover of a magazine?!" Hermione began strutting around the room as if she were on a runway. Ginny rolled off the bed collapsing into a fit of laughter.
"Stop it 'Mione…I can't breath!" Ginny managed between giggles. Hermione suddenly turned serious.
"Ya know Gin, you're like my best friend. I mean, Harry and Ron are my best friends too, but I can't talk to them like this. And I just wanted to say 'thanks'"
"Aww Herm! That's so sweet! You're my best friend too! You're like a big sister to me!" Ginny said getting up from the floor. The two girls looked at each other teary eyed and gave each other a quick hug.
"Okay...I think we need to finish this other job..." Hermione stated.
"What job?"
"Ok…which dress, and which eye shadow?" Hermione asked.
*******************************End Flashback*************************
2 LA told me: "You'll be a pop star All you have to change
Is everything you are"
Stop being compared
To damn Britney Spears
She's so pretty
That just ain't me
Hermione smiled at the memory. She felt an ache and realized how much she truly missed her friends.
'But they probably don't miss you. All you've been towards them is a big bitch. How could they ever forgive you? You aren't worth it.'
Hermione heard the voice in the back of her head. She had no other choice but to believe it. After all, if a man whom everybody hates manages to break your heart and cheat on you, what's going to happen when a man whom everyone loves comes along? She'd be gone in a second. How she wished that she were someone else. Ginny maybe. Yes, Ginny. Ginny was always so carefree, and she was happily with Harry. Harry would never ever cheat on someone. He was too noble, not to mention the fact that Ron would punch in his face if he ever hurt his little sister… How much Hermione wished she could be Ginny right now.
Doctor, doctor won't you please prescribe somthin'
A day in the life of someone else?
Cuz I'm a hazard to myself
Don't let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
It's bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don't wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
'Don't kid yourself Herm…You could never be like Ginny, not now anyways.'
Hermione thought back to the old Hermione, the genius, the beauty, the perfect student…How she missed that Hermione.
'But she's gone, and she's not comin' back. She can't come back…'
Doctor, doctor won't you please prescribe somthin'
A day in the life of someone else?
Cuz I'm a hazard to myself
Don't let me get me
I'm my own worst enemy
It's bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don't wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
Hermione turned back to the reflection. It hadn't changed at all during the last couple minutes, but it had changed so much from the girl Hermione wanted to be. She couldn't even recognize her anymore. She suddenly couldn't take it. Before she knew what she was doing, Hermione reached her fist back and punched the mirror and that ugly reflection as hard as she could. The mirror shattered.
'Life just isn't worth living anymore. I hate myself. My friends hate me. Just forget everything!'
Hermione reached down and grabbed one of the larger and shaper pieces of broken glass. Taking one more look at her doomed reflection, Hermione took a deep breath and dug the sharp edge into her wrist, feeling the burning pain when she lifted it up.
'Don't stop now, it isn't worth it! Do the other wrist! Do the other wrist!'
She heard the evil voice in her head say. Without another thought, Hermione slit the other wrist, and as the blood flowed freely out of the two large gashes, and Hermione's head began to spin, one last thought popped into her dying head.
'Why Hermione, why? You are a great person! Nobody hates you. Despite the cruel things you've done, each and every one of your friends loves you. So why?'
I'm my own worst enemy
It's bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don't wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
Hermione began to regret the rash decision she had made. But she knew that only a miracle could save her now. The dizziness was greater now, all thoughts dyed away as Hermione fell to the ground. But as she took a last breath, she heard the door fling open and one word spoken…"Hermione!"
A/N: I'm not gonna say much…all I'm gonna say is THERE WILL BE A NEXT CHAPTER!!! I'm not gonna leave Hermione like this…It should be up soon… Ok…please review- it will make me feel better!!! Love ya!