Snow was gently falling outside, steadily adding to the already sizeable accumulation on the sloping Hogwarts lawns. Rays of sunlight peeked through tiny pinholes in the overcast sky, desperately trying to escape the prison bars of the cement-colored clouds. Inside, incarcerated by windows and gloom, was Harry Potter, who was not very much in the Christmas spirit. Seamus Finnegan, Dean Thomas, Neville Longbottom, and even Harry's best friend Ron Weasley had returned to their homes for the winter holidays, and Harry felt very much alone. He and his friend Hermione Granger were practically the only people in Gryffindor who were staying for the holidays, but she was constantly in the library, studying for what seemed like days on end. He longed to talk to her, to anyone, but for the moment he was alone. After reading the same paragraph for the third time in his history textbook, still not taking in a word, he slammed it shut and dropped it to the floor, falling back on his bed, exhausted. His mind was somewhere else.
For the third day in a row, Hermione Granger sat in the library, hiding behind a pile of large books. Important Witches and Wizards in History lay open in front of her to about the halfway mark with a fresh roll of parchment off to the right side. To any passerby, it would appear that Hermione was diligently studying, but in reality, she had not read or written a word in three days. An epic battle was consuming her mind. Not a battle of which topic to study next or which book to read, but the classic struggle between heart and mind, between love and logic, between emotion and common sense. As questions unfolded in her mind that could not be answered by any book, she put her head down, finally admitting defeat to the tears that fought against her blinking eyes. Something had to give soon, because she could not live like this. Feeling torn, she drifted off to sleep.
Harry screamed out in anguish until his lungs had emptied. He screamed until he was reduced to a whimpering, panting mess. Tears streamed down his face at what had just happened, the sorrowful joy, the bittersweet victory. His legs gave out in extreme exhaustion and he fell down into the cold snow that had been stained red with blood. As his vision darkened he looked out again in front of him and saw two dead bodies that were becoming blurrier by the second. Blinded by tears and pain he slumped over onto the cold, wet ground. He felt a hand on his shoulder, but his body was a million miles away.
He woke up in a sweat, still dressed and crying. Looking around, he realized that he was back safe in his dorm room at Hogwarts. It was still snowing outside. That was a year ago, Harry thought, let it go already. He wiped the cold sweat off his forehead, put on his winter cloak, and headed outside to take a walk. He needed to clear his head.
Even from all the way across the grounds, Hermione could tell what had just happened. The sky lit up with green and a blood-curdling scream rent the air. The death eaters that were scattered about the grounds all fled at the sound of Lord Voldemort's demise. They all knew the battle was over. Hermione ran full pace to the other side of the grounds to see if Harry was all right, but it didn't look so. She heard his screams of anguish and as she drew closer, she only saw him on his knees cradling a dead body as Voldemort's corpse lay lifeless in front of him.
She woke up from her dream, startled, and found herself still in the library. It was late, and the sky had cleared, the full moon revealing the silhouettes of snowflakes falling daintily to the ground. She collected her things, pulled on her cloak, and went out for a walk. She needed to clear her head
As Harry wandered about the Hogwarts grounds, his mind was buzzing with thought. Ever since he killed Voldemort in his sixth year he had felt horrendously empty. Sure, he had received the admiration and praise of the entire wizarding world, but he felt as if nothing could replace what he lost that day. He felt that nothing could replace the hole in his heart that had burned so fiercely since she died.
Harry looked around and found himself walking by the edge of the forbidden forest, near Hagrid's hut. This is where it all happened, he thought while tears began to form in his eyes. He could remember so clearly what happened that day, how the death eaters had suddenly attacked Hogwarts, how the Hogwarts teachers and some of the students stood as the first line of defense. He remembered fighting side by side with Hermione and Ron. He remembered how he had told Cho Chang to go into hiding, to stay out of danger. He remembered how the Ministry of Magic aurors and the Order of the Phoenix showed up soon to save the day. But what he remembered with the most clarity was when Voldemort himself appeared, holding Cho by the neck. "Commit suicide, Potter, and I will spare Cho," Voldemort had said, and Harry was suddenly faced with the hardest decision of his life. Let Cho die but kill Voldemort, or let Cho live but let Voldemort live as well. He remembered so clearly how Voldemort placed the cruciatus curse on Cho, and how she writhed in pain. He tried hard to stop him, but he couldn't. Finally he put Cho out of her misery, and Harry was put into a rage. Swept up in every emotion he had ever felt, he killed Voldemort with a single curse and then screamed out in anguish. The bodies of Cho Chang and Voldemort lay in front of him. He fell to his knees next to Cho, sobbing madly, and cradled her in his arms one last time. As he passed out, someone touched his shoulder.
That was a year ago, Harry, he thought, now crying. It's all over, and Cho is gone, she's never coming back. Just move on, Harry, there is no point in clinging so desperately to the past. His tears fell, dotting the white snow in front of him.
Hermione walked out into the cold winter moonlight toward the lake. Thoughts were swarming in her head, overwhelming her. She felt so alone and confused; she knew the one she truly loved, but she could not love him, it would not be fair to him. I have to tell him, one part of her thought, but another part of her thought, No, I can't, he still loves another. Her mind exhausted, she sunk down into a wooden bench.
It wasn't too far from here where I first fell in love, she thought as the sting of new tears hit her eyes. She looked out across the lawn to the forbidden forest, right near Hagrid's hut. It was over there, one year ago, that I realized he was the one for me. She remembered how she ran over there, listening to his screams, and how she saw him passed out, cradling Cho's dead body in his arms. She thought he was dead and ran faster. She reached out and grabbed his shoulder, but he was limp, his body rolled over and when she saw his closed eyes she began to cry harder than ever before. At that moment she realized that she was in love with Harry. He was always there for her, he was the nice guy that was usually overlooked, and she had overlooked him. But now he was dead, and she would be forever alone. She passed out next to his body, exhausted and broken hearted.
He loves Cho, she thought. Even though she died one year ago, he still loves her. And even though I desperately love him, even though I long for him every day, he will never be mine. She got up from the bench and walked toward the lake, tears streaming down her face. But after she took her first step she bumped headfirst into someone she hadn't seen in three days. It was Harry Potter.
"Oh, sorry Hermione," Harry said, "I wasn't paying attention."
"It's all right, I wasn't either," Hermione replied, choking back her tears.
"Out for a walk?"
"Yeah, I badly needed a break."
"Me too, plus I saw that the sky had cleared up and the moon looked so beautiful."
"It sure is," Hermione said, looking up to see that Harry's eyes were glistening with tears. "Do you want to walk together?"
"Sure," Harry said, "I could use some company. I was just headed over to the lake."
They walked over to the lake in silence, swept up in the beauty of the moonlight sweeping across the Hogwarts grounds. Harry opened his mouth to speak, but as he looked down at Hermione he saw that her eyes were red and puffy as if she had just been crying. He closed his mouth and they kept walking in silence.
Harry swept the snow off a bench near the lake and sat down. Hermione sat next to him, but left a good distance between them. After a few minutes, Harry finally broke the silence.
"What's wrong Hermione? You don't look too well."
"Oh it's nothing, I think I'm having an allergic reaction to something," she lied. "You don't look so well either, Harry."
"... It's okay, I was just... thinking about some stuff... I'll be fine."
They sat in a somewhat awkward silence for a while, locked in a stalemate. Harry glanced over at Hermione, who was staring up to the stars, and saw her beautiful eyes lit up by the moonlight. For the first time since Cho died, Harry finally was able to make sense of himself, he was able to finally move on from the past and be happy again. In the moonlight, his love for Hermione finally unfolded within his heart. He wanted so badly to confess his feelings for her, but he knew it had to wait. She had just been crying, and he did not know how she would take it. The last thing he wanted was to upset her more.
"I miss you, Hermione," he said softly.
"What do you mean?" She replied, turning her head and making eye contact.
"Well... It's just that I feel like we haven't really talked or been that close since last year."
Hermione was burning up inside. She so desperately wanted to tell him why. She wanted to pour her feelings of love out to him, but she knew it was not the right time. She did not know how he would take it, and the last thing she wanted to do was upset him more.
"...It's just... well... I've been busy... with homework and stuff, you know..." she said, slightly turning her head away.
Harry felt a little defeated. He knew there was more to it, but why wouldn't she just tell him? As he looked at her, butterflies formed in his stomach for the first time in ages and the hint of a smile began on his face. Unable to find the right moment to speak, he leaned back in the bench and looked up to the stars.
Hermione turned to face him and saw his face silhouetted against the moonlight. She opened her mouth to speak, but her stomach lurched and she said nothing. In that moment, everything made sense. It was if some divine power had warmed her heart and made her forget about everything else. There was no Cho anymore, no Viktor Krum, no Hogwarts, there was just Hermione and Harry. She knew it now more than ever that she had to speak her feelings.
They spoke at the same time.
"Harry..."
"Hermione..."
There was a short pause that hung in the air for what seemed like hours, and then Hermione spoke again,
"I have something to tell you, Harry, but I'm not sure how you're going to take it," she began as Harry's heart started to race, "What I'm feeling right now is unexplainable, and it's tearing me apart. My whole life, the answer has been laid out so simply in books and charts, but my heart is winning out over my mind and I'm really confused. Harry, this might be a touchy subject, but I have to bring it up – one year ago, almost to this day, when you killed Voldemort, I saw you right after it happened. I saw you cradling Cho's body, and I thought you were dead. I turned you over, and you were totally limp Harry, and I cried harder than ever before. It was then, when I saw your lifeless body on the blood stained snow that I realized I couldn't live without you. It was right in that moment that my heart finally filled up with love, and it was all for you. And it still is, Harry. I think about you every day, but thoughts alone cannot fill the space in my heart that longs so desperately for you. I love you Harry."
Suddenly, Harry felt as if he had lifted several feet off the ground. His heart was racing and the butterflies in his stomach were turning into bats. It was her that cared for him on the battlefield, and it was her that was there for him all along. He looked deeply into her eyes, which were quickly filling up with tears and said,
"Ever since Cho died, a part of me was missing. She was my first love, and I know that I will always miss her, but that was a year ago, and what good would it do me to live my life in the past? She is gone, and I need to move on. I know how it feels, Hermione, to get wrapped up in the moment. I know how it feels for suddenly everything to make sense. Just a few moments ago, I looked over and saw the starlight reflecting in your eyes, and for the first time in a year, I felt right inside. I felt happy. It was then that I realized that you were the one who always cared for me the most. You were the one that was always there for me. You're so beautiful Hermione, and not only on the outside. You are the greatest person I have ever met, and well... how could I possibly not love you back?"
Hermione began to cry. She was the happiest ever in her whole life. For once she had everything figured out, and it felt as if anything was possible. Her heart on fire, she moved in closer to Harry and leaned her head in toward his. He followed suit and for just a moment, it felt to both of them as if time had stopped. Under the winter starlight Harry and Hermione shared their first kiss, and for the first time in both of their lives, they felt totally complete.
Harry leaned back slowly from the kiss, opening his eyes to see Hermione's angelic face. He reached his hand up to brush some hair out of his face, and out of habit, felt for his scar. He gasped as he ran his hand smoothly over his forehead. His scar had faded away to nothing.
Love, Harry Potter thought, is a magic greater than anything we do here at Hogwarts.
For the third day in a row, Hermione Granger sat in the library, hiding behind a pile of large books. Important Witches and Wizards in History lay open in front of her to about the halfway mark with a fresh roll of parchment off to the right side. To any passerby, it would appear that Hermione was diligently studying, but in reality, she had not read or written a word in three days. An epic battle was consuming her mind. Not a battle of which topic to study next or which book to read, but the classic struggle between heart and mind, between love and logic, between emotion and common sense. As questions unfolded in her mind that could not be answered by any book, she put her head down, finally admitting defeat to the tears that fought against her blinking eyes. Something had to give soon, because she could not live like this. Feeling torn, she drifted off to sleep.
Harry screamed out in anguish until his lungs had emptied. He screamed until he was reduced to a whimpering, panting mess. Tears streamed down his face at what had just happened, the sorrowful joy, the bittersweet victory. His legs gave out in extreme exhaustion and he fell down into the cold snow that had been stained red with blood. As his vision darkened he looked out again in front of him and saw two dead bodies that were becoming blurrier by the second. Blinded by tears and pain he slumped over onto the cold, wet ground. He felt a hand on his shoulder, but his body was a million miles away.
He woke up in a sweat, still dressed and crying. Looking around, he realized that he was back safe in his dorm room at Hogwarts. It was still snowing outside. That was a year ago, Harry thought, let it go already. He wiped the cold sweat off his forehead, put on his winter cloak, and headed outside to take a walk. He needed to clear his head.
Even from all the way across the grounds, Hermione could tell what had just happened. The sky lit up with green and a blood-curdling scream rent the air. The death eaters that were scattered about the grounds all fled at the sound of Lord Voldemort's demise. They all knew the battle was over. Hermione ran full pace to the other side of the grounds to see if Harry was all right, but it didn't look so. She heard his screams of anguish and as she drew closer, she only saw him on his knees cradling a dead body as Voldemort's corpse lay lifeless in front of him.
She woke up from her dream, startled, and found herself still in the library. It was late, and the sky had cleared, the full moon revealing the silhouettes of snowflakes falling daintily to the ground. She collected her things, pulled on her cloak, and went out for a walk. She needed to clear her head
As Harry wandered about the Hogwarts grounds, his mind was buzzing with thought. Ever since he killed Voldemort in his sixth year he had felt horrendously empty. Sure, he had received the admiration and praise of the entire wizarding world, but he felt as if nothing could replace what he lost that day. He felt that nothing could replace the hole in his heart that had burned so fiercely since she died.
Harry looked around and found himself walking by the edge of the forbidden forest, near Hagrid's hut. This is where it all happened, he thought while tears began to form in his eyes. He could remember so clearly what happened that day, how the death eaters had suddenly attacked Hogwarts, how the Hogwarts teachers and some of the students stood as the first line of defense. He remembered fighting side by side with Hermione and Ron. He remembered how he had told Cho Chang to go into hiding, to stay out of danger. He remembered how the Ministry of Magic aurors and the Order of the Phoenix showed up soon to save the day. But what he remembered with the most clarity was when Voldemort himself appeared, holding Cho by the neck. "Commit suicide, Potter, and I will spare Cho," Voldemort had said, and Harry was suddenly faced with the hardest decision of his life. Let Cho die but kill Voldemort, or let Cho live but let Voldemort live as well. He remembered so clearly how Voldemort placed the cruciatus curse on Cho, and how she writhed in pain. He tried hard to stop him, but he couldn't. Finally he put Cho out of her misery, and Harry was put into a rage. Swept up in every emotion he had ever felt, he killed Voldemort with a single curse and then screamed out in anguish. The bodies of Cho Chang and Voldemort lay in front of him. He fell to his knees next to Cho, sobbing madly, and cradled her in his arms one last time. As he passed out, someone touched his shoulder.
That was a year ago, Harry, he thought, now crying. It's all over, and Cho is gone, she's never coming back. Just move on, Harry, there is no point in clinging so desperately to the past. His tears fell, dotting the white snow in front of him.
Hermione walked out into the cold winter moonlight toward the lake. Thoughts were swarming in her head, overwhelming her. She felt so alone and confused; she knew the one she truly loved, but she could not love him, it would not be fair to him. I have to tell him, one part of her thought, but another part of her thought, No, I can't, he still loves another. Her mind exhausted, she sunk down into a wooden bench.
It wasn't too far from here where I first fell in love, she thought as the sting of new tears hit her eyes. She looked out across the lawn to the forbidden forest, right near Hagrid's hut. It was over there, one year ago, that I realized he was the one for me. She remembered how she ran over there, listening to his screams, and how she saw him passed out, cradling Cho's dead body in his arms. She thought he was dead and ran faster. She reached out and grabbed his shoulder, but he was limp, his body rolled over and when she saw his closed eyes she began to cry harder than ever before. At that moment she realized that she was in love with Harry. He was always there for her, he was the nice guy that was usually overlooked, and she had overlooked him. But now he was dead, and she would be forever alone. She passed out next to his body, exhausted and broken hearted.
He loves Cho, she thought. Even though she died one year ago, he still loves her. And even though I desperately love him, even though I long for him every day, he will never be mine. She got up from the bench and walked toward the lake, tears streaming down her face. But after she took her first step she bumped headfirst into someone she hadn't seen in three days. It was Harry Potter.
"Oh, sorry Hermione," Harry said, "I wasn't paying attention."
"It's all right, I wasn't either," Hermione replied, choking back her tears.
"Out for a walk?"
"Yeah, I badly needed a break."
"Me too, plus I saw that the sky had cleared up and the moon looked so beautiful."
"It sure is," Hermione said, looking up to see that Harry's eyes were glistening with tears. "Do you want to walk together?"
"Sure," Harry said, "I could use some company. I was just headed over to the lake."
They walked over to the lake in silence, swept up in the beauty of the moonlight sweeping across the Hogwarts grounds. Harry opened his mouth to speak, but as he looked down at Hermione he saw that her eyes were red and puffy as if she had just been crying. He closed his mouth and they kept walking in silence.
Harry swept the snow off a bench near the lake and sat down. Hermione sat next to him, but left a good distance between them. After a few minutes, Harry finally broke the silence.
"What's wrong Hermione? You don't look too well."
"Oh it's nothing, I think I'm having an allergic reaction to something," she lied. "You don't look so well either, Harry."
"... It's okay, I was just... thinking about some stuff... I'll be fine."
They sat in a somewhat awkward silence for a while, locked in a stalemate. Harry glanced over at Hermione, who was staring up to the stars, and saw her beautiful eyes lit up by the moonlight. For the first time since Cho died, Harry finally was able to make sense of himself, he was able to finally move on from the past and be happy again. In the moonlight, his love for Hermione finally unfolded within his heart. He wanted so badly to confess his feelings for her, but he knew it had to wait. She had just been crying, and he did not know how she would take it. The last thing he wanted was to upset her more.
"I miss you, Hermione," he said softly.
"What do you mean?" She replied, turning her head and making eye contact.
"Well... It's just that I feel like we haven't really talked or been that close since last year."
Hermione was burning up inside. She so desperately wanted to tell him why. She wanted to pour her feelings of love out to him, but she knew it was not the right time. She did not know how he would take it, and the last thing she wanted to do was upset him more.
"...It's just... well... I've been busy... with homework and stuff, you know..." she said, slightly turning her head away.
Harry felt a little defeated. He knew there was more to it, but why wouldn't she just tell him? As he looked at her, butterflies formed in his stomach for the first time in ages and the hint of a smile began on his face. Unable to find the right moment to speak, he leaned back in the bench and looked up to the stars.
Hermione turned to face him and saw his face silhouetted against the moonlight. She opened her mouth to speak, but her stomach lurched and she said nothing. In that moment, everything made sense. It was if some divine power had warmed her heart and made her forget about everything else. There was no Cho anymore, no Viktor Krum, no Hogwarts, there was just Hermione and Harry. She knew it now more than ever that she had to speak her feelings.
They spoke at the same time.
"Harry..."
"Hermione..."
There was a short pause that hung in the air for what seemed like hours, and then Hermione spoke again,
"I have something to tell you, Harry, but I'm not sure how you're going to take it," she began as Harry's heart started to race, "What I'm feeling right now is unexplainable, and it's tearing me apart. My whole life, the answer has been laid out so simply in books and charts, but my heart is winning out over my mind and I'm really confused. Harry, this might be a touchy subject, but I have to bring it up – one year ago, almost to this day, when you killed Voldemort, I saw you right after it happened. I saw you cradling Cho's body, and I thought you were dead. I turned you over, and you were totally limp Harry, and I cried harder than ever before. It was then, when I saw your lifeless body on the blood stained snow that I realized I couldn't live without you. It was right in that moment that my heart finally filled up with love, and it was all for you. And it still is, Harry. I think about you every day, but thoughts alone cannot fill the space in my heart that longs so desperately for you. I love you Harry."
Suddenly, Harry felt as if he had lifted several feet off the ground. His heart was racing and the butterflies in his stomach were turning into bats. It was her that cared for him on the battlefield, and it was her that was there for him all along. He looked deeply into her eyes, which were quickly filling up with tears and said,
"Ever since Cho died, a part of me was missing. She was my first love, and I know that I will always miss her, but that was a year ago, and what good would it do me to live my life in the past? She is gone, and I need to move on. I know how it feels, Hermione, to get wrapped up in the moment. I know how it feels for suddenly everything to make sense. Just a few moments ago, I looked over and saw the starlight reflecting in your eyes, and for the first time in a year, I felt right inside. I felt happy. It was then that I realized that you were the one who always cared for me the most. You were the one that was always there for me. You're so beautiful Hermione, and not only on the outside. You are the greatest person I have ever met, and well... how could I possibly not love you back?"
Hermione began to cry. She was the happiest ever in her whole life. For once she had everything figured out, and it felt as if anything was possible. Her heart on fire, she moved in closer to Harry and leaned her head in toward his. He followed suit and for just a moment, it felt to both of them as if time had stopped. Under the winter starlight Harry and Hermione shared their first kiss, and for the first time in both of their lives, they felt totally complete.
Harry leaned back slowly from the kiss, opening his eyes to see Hermione's angelic face. He reached his hand up to brush some hair out of his face, and out of habit, felt for his scar. He gasped as he ran his hand smoothly over his forehead. His scar had faded away to nothing.
Love, Harry Potter thought, is a magic greater than anything we do here at Hogwarts.