Scramble for North America
I do not own Hetalia or any of the characters, just the plot. And if I did own it, Canada and America would be the main characters. Canada is noticed in this story and some are a bit OOC. And Alice is much better at magic than Arthur.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~Meeting-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
It all started a week after Valentine's Day.
It was a normal World Meeting, so far. Sun was shining, birds were singing, nations were screaming. You know, the usual. But Prussia had to interrupt, didn't she?
"I, the awesome Prussia, vill now claim Canada's vital regions as my own, and vill take him out on an awesome date!" Julchen proclaimed, standing up proudly on the meeting table and in sight of every nation present, which was, well, the world.
Utter silence.
The nations were shell-shocked, never expecting someone, even Prussia, to say something like that. You see, ever since the Valentine's Day meeting, the female nations (which was everyone except the North American Twins) realized that America and Canada were quite handsome and charming, not to mention single. However, they never thought someone would try to snatch them that fast.
The brothers, on the other hand, were oblivious to this fact. Sure, they knew they were hot, but after decades of no one mentioning this, they simply decided to ignore this, thinking no one would notice. They certainly never thought that a normal-ish Valentine's would change this. How wrong they were.
"Excuse me! What are you saying, Prussia? And why are you even in here?" England said, who was holding her pitch at the time, her tone incredulous. "You can't just go and announce that to the whole world! You haven't even asked Matthew!"
"You're right! Mattie, vill you go on a date with the awesome me?"
Canada went bright – erm, brighter – red. What a time to be visible.
America, however, was enjoying this. That is, until he heard what Alice said next.
Not even allowing time for Canada to even open his mouth to answer, England started talking again. "Fine, but if you get Canada, I get America!"
"Wait, dudettes, slow down he–"
"You, have Canada? Please, mon petit garçon is obviously in love with me!" France flipped her luxurious brown hair. Man, how did you get that kind of hair? "None of you has a chance against moi!"
"Um, can I just answer you next –" Canada was cut off by Veniciana this time. Oh, won't any country let either of the twins talk?
"Ve, sorrela, why don't you-a ask Canada and-a I'll ask America? You-a always liked him and America is-a nice to me. Ve~" Feliciana said with a dreamy look on her face. Alfred always shared his burgers with her while she tried to teach him how to cook pasta. Key word: tried. Apparently, bad cooking is hereditary. Such a shame.
"Feliciana! You can't just blurt that out, especially at a World Meeting!" Lovina glanced desperately at Matthew, trying to catch his expression. There was a beautiful red splashed on his cheeks, suiting his pale skin perfectly. "You said you wouldn't tell anyone!"
"Girls, you don't have to fight over the hero and his side–" Darn, Alfred thought, his features souring, I almost finished my sentence this time.
"No, America and Canada will become one with me, da? I have taken a liking to them, so they should be part of Russia, especially Fredka," Russia laughed softly, emitting a dark aura.
America and Canada unconsciously spoke in unison. "Girls, stop fig– " Useless. I guess even twin power fails sometimes. The meeting was falling in to disarray, everyone squabbling over the North American brothers.
"They belong to me! I raised them!" You can tell who said that.
"They will become one." Non-existing prizes for the person who knows this nation.
"Ve~ America, do you want pasta?" You'll have to be an idiot to not be able to guess this one. Or perhaps just new to this fandom. I pity you then.
"Canada, America, ve vill go training at five AM tomorrow, on the dot!" I doubt either of them will come.
"Fusosososo~ Mattie looks so cute when blushing. Almost like you, Lovi." Pretty easy, this one.
"Don't call me that, Tomato bitch! And don't call Canada cute! Only I should be able to do that!" Yes, we all know who this one is. It's France. Nah, I'm just kidding.
"Mon chere! Come to Big Sister France! I will protect you from England's terrible cooking!" Ah, the England card. That always works. Not this time though.
"Arfred, wourd you rike to come to my house to pray the new games I have?" Nice approach, actually. Kudos.
"Vinland! America! Visit Scandinavia with the rest of the Nordics! And Norway wants you to call her 'Big Sister!'" The Scandinavian Queen herself. That's right. Sweden. Nah, I'm just joking again.
The twins, however, were already slipping out of the door, catching only half of what Denmark said. They left in their place holograms Alfred got from Tony. Thank god for that. If it weren't for those things, they would have never escaped the pris- um, I mean meeting room.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~Running away~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"Move it, Mattie!" Alfred was panting. The moment they stepped out of the door, they bolted, running as fast as nation superpowers could, which was pretty darn fast. "Tony said they only last five minutes after we're out of a five-meter radius! They'll notice that we're gone soon!"
"Shut up, Al! I've got enough to worry about already! I told you we shouldn't have worn those tight clothes during Valentine's!" Matthew, being the brains of the operation, figured out the root of their problems. "Now, quit lagging behind! You're the one who need to hurry. We got to reach the janitor's closet in time!"
The janitor's closet Matthew previously mentioned was the twin's secret hide-out. It was for when they needed a reprieve, to talk to talk to each other like brothers, or when they needed to hide from love-struck female nations, like now. It was rather useful.
They skidded to a stop, having run too fast and not able to slow down properly. Alfred wrenched the door open and they stumbled inside. He slammed the door and locked it, but they knew if any nations were to find them, they could easily break down the door down. No one can ever say female nations are weak.
They sat down heavily on the cement, backs against the wall. The room itself was bare of any actual cleaning supplies because the Twins claimed it after meeting here a couple of times. The mops and brooms were replaced with books (for Mattie), comics (for Alfred), and non-perishable snacks (for both). They could camp out here for a few hours and would be fine. That is, if no one finds them.
"Ma-Matt, what do you mean?" the American was still breathing heavily, but continued anyway. "Valentine's couldn't possibly affect – Oh," That's right; Al managed to convince Matt to dress sexily for one day.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~Flash Back~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
On that fateful day, America somehow talked his brother into wearing tight, uncomfortable jeans, which accented his firm ass perfectly; a form-fitting red-and-white Tee that revealed a surprising amount of muscle; a maple leaf necklace; and even made him leave Kumajirou behind so he couldn't hide behind the bear cub.
Likewise, Alfred wore a pair of cowboy boots, similar tight ripped jeans, that looked delicious on him, an extremely sleeveless patriotic shirt, and his signature bomber jacket left in his hotel room to reveal his arms. Both brothers decide to forego brushing their hair, giving it that I-just-rolled-out-of-bed-and-i-look-amazing style to it.
They strolled into the room ten minutes late, each holding a cup of coffee, after leaving their coats on the hanging rack (which was LONG) beyond the room.
"America! Canada! Jou're la–" Monica then blushed bright red, which was truly a sight to behold. "Vh-Vhat are jou vearing?!"
"Dudette, chill! Me and Mattie –" "Mattie and I," Canada corrected automatically. "Right, Mattie and I just had a hard time choosing our clothes. It's Valentine's Day and all, a perfect time to be a hero!" America said cheerfully, oblivious to the women's reddening faces.
"Ha-Have a seat, wankers!" England choked out, trying to mask her blush with anger. Not really working, now that I think about it.
The female personifications had to survive three hours with two extremely sexy, oblivious twins. Scratch that, three hours with two extremely sexy, oblivious and flirtytwins getting into the Valentine's Day spirit. How they would regret that later on.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~Present~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~
"Mattie, what are we gonna do?!" The southern twin stood up.
"Alfred, calm down."
"We'll have to move. Stay hidden for two decades and come back after they've forgotten."
"Alfred."
"I should change my name. You should too," Alfred started pacing. The closet was fairly big enough to do so. "I want it to be Allen. What about you?"
"Alfred!"
"You can't be Alfred, I'm Alfred! Pick another name! Oh, we could hide out in you place, Matt. You know, the forest near that lake."
"ALFRED!" Canada screamed as loudly as he dared without alerting the searching nations.
"What?!"
"I've got an idea. But I'll need your help. Do you still have those hologram things?"
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~Escaping~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"Are you sure this will work?" Alfred hissed to his twin while peering through a crack of the door.
"100% sure. Okay, maybe just 70% sure. Just don't screw it up!" the northern brother responded above to him.
They waited for a nation to pass by. As luck would have it, Feliciana herself was turning the corner.
Matthew whispered, "Now!"
Alfred launched the present that Tony gave him during Christmas while muttering something about crazy females and pushy brothers. It was a special edition, one with wheels. A hologram of them running shot past Italy, causing her to alert the other nation via screaming. They waited for most of them to pass before taking their chances and running out the door like the hounds of hell were chasing them (or Russia).
They didn't stop until they reached their shared hotel room which was actually part of the building. How convenient. They grabbed their passports and headed to the airport. Two tickets to England, here they come.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~England~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
Of course, luck wasn't on their side this time. In their haste, they forgot that it was the last meeting day of the month, meaning everyone should be home by now. This meant that as America and Canada stood on front of England's home it wasn't empty.
Canada jiggled the nob and was surprised to find it unlocked. But he shrugged and thought that Lady Luck was still with them. Loser. He eased the door open, wincing at every creak. The Twins quickly and carefully entered, closed the door, and turned, only to find Alice staring at them.
"Canada? O-oh Alfred, I didn't see you there," England's thoughts jumbled about in her mind, unable to think clearly in her crush's unexpected arrival. "Wait, what are you doing in my house? Why are you even in England?!"
Alfred shot Matthew a look. I got this. You go find the book.
"Iggy, aren't you happy to see me? We flew all this way to see you and this is how you treat us! Hey, Iggy, I actually have a favor to ask you…" With Alice's attention on Alfred, Matthew snuck away using his infamous invisibility, and quickly located England's magic room. He grabbed a random book of spells and flipped through the pages, skimming the old parchment.
Hmm, snow spell, no. Morphing spell, cool, but not needed. Love spell… Why does this look used? Aha! Memory spell! I got it! I better take the whole book though, I'm sure England won't miss it, she's got hundreds!
Matthew hurriedly stuffed the book into his backpack and scurried out of the dark room. He stepped into the living room and found his twin against the wall with Alice on tiptoes… Kissing him. Well, that's definitely one way to shut him up.
Mattie stepped back and accidentally bumped into the coffee table. The Brit pulled back abruptly and looked bashful. Alfred on the other hand, had a dazed look on his face that made it clear he still hadn't registered the kiss into his brain.
"I-, uh, wha?" Excellent vocabulary, Alfred.
"Listen, England, I'll bring America back soon. Possibly. There's just something we need to do first," Canada, for once, managed to get England's attention. Leaving no time for her to respond, he ran for the exit, towing Alfred, who was still quite out of it. They reached the car they rented and Matthew opened the car door and, showing no hesitation, shoved his twin inside. Alfred gave not protest. Poor dear, kissed by his crush and has no idea what do. Matthew got into the driver's seat and immediately slammed his foot down in the accelerator. Off to the airport again, I suppose.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~Driving ~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
Alfred recovered by the time they boarded their plane. He didn't know that Iggy liked him that way! He knew he was the hero and all, but he didn't know Alice wanted to be his sidekick! He didn't even know that anyone in the world (haha, punny) would like him and Mattie! What will they do? It was definitely not heroic to pick one girl and break everyone else's. Well, if Mattie chooses too, then they everyone's heart except for two lucky girls. This was terrible!
As they drove to Mattie's house, (because he's the only one of them with of them with a magic room) Alfred's thought were still racing.
I've always liked England, with that tsundere attitude of hers. But then again, Italy's so nice to me. Russia and I always fight, but she's really beautiful and sweet. It seems like Germany likes both me and Mattie. France is great, even though she's a bit pervy. Netherlands likes Mattie and her sister, Belgium, like us both. China's cute and she even let me hold her panda! Japan's awesome; she plays video games with me all the time. Speaking of awesome, I can't let Prussia near my baby bro! The Baltics-
America's thought screeched to a stop. Or maybe those were just the car's wheel. Yup, those were the wheels.
"What the hell, Matt? A little warning next time!"
"Sorry, Al," Matthew glanced nervously at his brother. "But we're here. Let's practice this spell."
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~Magic Room~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"Al, there's a problem. We have to do it in the presence of our vict- er, targets."
"I thought you read this on the plane, Matt!"
"Well, it's kind of hard to read a suspicious, huge, black book in a plane full of mortals, eh!"
"Don't sass me in your passive-aggressive way! Just memorize the spell! I'm calling an emergency meeting next week. I'll memorize it afterwards. We got to make this work!"
You see, their plan was to erase the other nation's memory of Valentine's Day. If this worked, maybe things could go back to normal and the twins could ask the girl they like out on a date. That is, if this works. But they should know better. Luck was hardly ever on their side.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~Emergency Meeting~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
"What is it, Amerika? Are you going to become one with me?" Russia asked innocently as the rest took their positions around the mahogany meeting table.
"Uh, no. Me and Mattie (Mattie and I) found something that's super important. One sec," Alfred patted the pockets of his jeans. After a few minutes, he finally checked the inside of his bomber jacket. "Aha! Found it!" He produced a sheet of paper from the pocket with the flourish of a magician.
"Just one moment. We gotta read it together so it will be fair. Come on, Matt," As the twins huddled over the paper that was clearly written in Alfred's handwriting, the other nations grew curious. What could be so important America had to call a surprise meeting?
"Alright, here we go," Matthew was apprehensive. So was Alfred, but he was hiding it well. What if something went wrong? They knew firsthand from Alice that anything could happen when doing magic.
They started chanting.
"Bless my mind and bless my heart,
Let these thought depart.
This memory has run its course,
Now cast it out with Witches force.
On the countr-"
England, who recognized the spell, realized what was happening before anyone else. She tackled the twins, interrupting them mid-spell, stupid mistake on her part. She of all people should know that stopping a spell already in motion could lead to some nasty consequences.
"America, Canada, no!"
Too late. A mini mushroom cloud erupted from where the trio lay. It enveloped the entire room, surrounding each and every nation present. Which was the entire world. As the nations stumbled around blindly, bumping into each other, a change came over them. They still retained their memory, yes, but something happened.
"Iggy? Iggy, why did you do that? Mattie, are you all right?" America coughed and waved away the smoke that was already dissipating. America knew something was wrong. He could feel it in his guts. His voice sounded different and something in his nether regions seemed to be missing. He finally opened his eyes and saw a stranger that looked vaguely familiar. He then realized that said stranger was on top of him. He screamed, which definitely did not sound heroic. Or manly. It actually sounded a bit feminine…
"Who are you?! Get of me!"
"What are you talking about, git? It's me, England!"
"Iggy's a girl! You're a guy! Wait, England?" America took a closer look at him. Indeed, he was a male version of the England he knew, only with bushier eyebrows. Then he looked to himself. He had a female chest and his clothes were different. He was still wearing his- or should I say her- bomber jacket, but instead of her superman shirt, she was wearing a patriotic bra over her- ahem, generous bosom. She had skinny jeans on her with knee-length cowboy boots over them. America turned into a girl.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~ Matthew ~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
Matthew was still a bit dazed when he heard Alfred scream. He turned his blurred gaze toward his brother and found him staring at himself with horror. My brother is now my sister, he thought dimly. He should have been more surprised, especially since it looked like there was an England look-alike on her stomach. The Canadian connected the dots and looked frantically down on his self.
He was wearing a long-sleeved red dress that reached third way to his knees and violet leggings. The top covered a lot more of his chest, but it did nothing to hide the fact that the top half of his torso is bigger than America's. The Canadian Rockies was serving him well. His hair now reached his hips, but the wayward curl was still there. Damn you, England, he thought, fuming, you've turned us into girls and yourself into a boy. I'm going to kill you, slowly and painfully.
She stood to assess the damage that occurred. Every female personification had turned into guys and it appeared that only the North American Twins were women. All the now-male personifications were in their military's uniform while America and Canada were wearing casual clothing. Is this an unspoken decree of magic or something?
"Alright, vhat happened?" Jesus, Germany's voice was deep. And intimidating. Germany spotted her and his eyes widened by a fraction. "Canada? Jou're a girl? Vhy are the rest of us men?"
Before the other nations could start shouting, Mattie shoved England off her twin, producing a few curses and slight disappointment. She helped her sister up, whispered a few words to her, and started explaining quickly to the room, fast enough that no nation could interrupt her.
When she finished, there was silence. Not a single person made a move except the North American twins, who shuffled their feet nervously, trying to look innocent. Finally, the arrogant prick who started this whole mess spoke up.
"Well, from a story like that, it seems like you've only caused a bigger problem for yourselves," the albino's eyes were devious. He locked them with Canada's. Never a good sign. "I'll have to teach you some discipline."
With that, he tackled Matthew – or rather, Madeline- and started to kiss her ferociously. Maddie struggled at first, but then started to melt into the kiss. The other nations were once again awestruck by the Prussian's audacity. Only England – now called Arthur – reacted, but not in the way you thought he would have. He shrugged, turned to grab Amelia, formerly known as Alfred, and kissed her just like Prussia was doing to Canada.
He only had a few seconds though. His sudden action kick started the bystanders back into business. Russia ripped him away from America, feeling extremely murderous. England had a smug and accomplished grin on his face, like he was just granted a wish from a genie. America, on the other hand, was as dazed as the time she was when first kissed by the Britt.
Prussia was hauled off the floor by his brother. He looked as if his wildest dream was fulfilled. Netherlands, in a show of uncharacteristic kindness, was tending to Madeline, who was just as surprised as her sister. Abel saw this and decided to just scoop her up into his arms, which provoked multiple jealous hisses from the watching crowd.
The nations returned to their seats, but kept their eyes on the twins. Amelia and Madeline has snapped out of their shock by now and now turned to face England, who still had that bloody smile on his face.
"Please tell us this isn't permanent," they were begging. The twins never do that. They must be truly desperate. "England, answer us!"
"Sorry, love. Spells like this usually has an expiration date of a couple hundred years," England coated his voice with fake sympathy and badly hidden glee. "Besides, I think we all like this form better on us and you. Right, lads?"
No one protested.
"As Prussia said, you've created a bigger problem for yourselves. We won't leave you alone until you will let us take you out on a date and chosen one of us. What do you say?"
The Twins exchange nervous looks. Judging from everyone's expressions, England wasn't joking, that bastard. "We don't have much choice, do we?" Amelia sighed. This was going to be a long two hundred years.
The other nations were starting to smile. They like this idea. They liked it very much. But they also know that winning the twins' hearts isn't going to be easy, especially with all this competition. This is war.
And Amelia and Madeline are the prizes.
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~ The End ~- ~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
SEX! MURDER! GENOCIDE! ANIMAL CRUELTY! Now that I got your attention, please read the following below to understand some stuff.
That is all, for now. Thank you everyone and anyone crazy enough to read something written by me. First published story here everyone. YES!
I wrote this story mostly on my own, but the sequel will be written by my sister and I. My code name is Zoe (the Huntress) and hers is Skye (the… Sky). Yes, incredibly long names, right?