hehehe...I wanted to get this out of my system. I really wanted to use a variation of a muslim pick-up line I read online "I didn't trip on my robe, I fell for you."

so yeah...DeiSaku Crack

I don't know if I'll continue, but it just sounds fun. At the moment, I'm focusing more on Morbid Curiosity, a HidanSakura Crack Fic...

flashbacks

Inner Sakura Inner Sakura

Present time and actions

"Hah! I thought Akatsuki were better then that! You tripped on your own cloak!" Sakura laughed spitefully as she stared at the madly grinning Akatsuki member sprawled before her. He got up and briskly brushed himself off before giving her an affectionate smile.

"I didn't trip on my cloak, I fell for you." He replied smoothly in a deep, rich voice.

"Yeah, I'm sure. Now, why don't you just turn around and leave me alone? Or do you really want me to leave you alone in pieces?" Sakura took a step back over the uneven ground as he advanced with an extending hand to kneel before her with his head bowed.

"Your beauty infinitely changes." He looked up determinedly and clasped her hand before she could jump back.

"The memory of each moment of such fleeting beauty is the truest form of art." He kissed the top of her hand, never breaking eye contact. Blue stared into green. Green eyes widened and the pale face they were set in suddenly flushed pink.

"I am an artist and you are my muse, un." He said, dropping her hand and grinning up at her as she stared at him dumbfounded as she flashed back to her latest actions.

The blond Akatsuki member and pink haired kunoichi faced off in the middle of a forest clearing. He floated above her on his CPV (Chakra-Powered Vehicle) that was sculpted to resemble some sort of avian. She was a close range fighter and did the best she could with the long-range specialist.. She tried to hit him , but he managed to dodge all ground attacks and retaliate efficiently with bombs from the air above her. Growling in frustration, she jumped over to the best looking tree for her needs. Wrapping her arms around its trunk, she heaved. Once unearthed, she swung the more-than-150 meter tall tree blindly in the air as if it were some giant fly swatter and the Akatsuki on his CPV, the fly. Two seconds later, she heard a thunk but didn't pay attention or let up on her wild swinging until she herself got tired out. Putting the tree down, she gasped for breath and leaned against the trunk.

Surveying the damage, there were leaves and broken branches everywhere and among them she saw a pile of leaves and clay stand up. As the figure moved its limbs, the leaves and clay residue fell off to reveal the still living-and-breathing Akatsuki member. Oh great, he can still move.

The enemy was too busy picking leaves and clay out of his long, blond hair to notice her until she jumped to stand on the rocks right in front of him with one hand on her hip and the other formed into her signature fist, ready to punch his lights out. Seeing this threat to his physical being, he jumped back quicker then she thought he could as he reached into his cloak to bring forth a weapon or more clay, no doubt.

The only thing was, as soon as he landed a safe distance away, he stilled and stared . His hand still remained in his cloak but he slowly drew it out empty. All of a sudden he was advancing on her sooner then expected, especially without a weapon drawn. He stopped about ten feet short of her and reached up to his face to remove the metal scope covering his left eye. Sakura had no idea what he was doing, but he stood like that and studied her for a few moments before taking a step forward and tripping on his own cloak. The idea of an Akatsuki member tripping on his own cloak was amusing enough, but to actually see it happen before you…well, that was something else because it caused Inner-Sakura to blurt out whatever she had just thought. (back in the beginning of the story)

Oh yeah…did I seriously hit him that hard?

"I'm Deidara, by the way, and I'm not leaving you alone. Not until I create my masterpiece, un. So who are you?"

"W-What!?! No! Go away before I make you!" Sakura was not amused as she scrambled back.

"You know you're not going to do that if I don't attack you. And don't worry, I'm not going to. Why would I harm my muse?" Deidara had taken a step back from her so she would stop squirming.

"I am NOT your muse! And I will hurt you!" Sakura knew she was fibbing but this crazy Akatsuki had to go. Deidara looked at her skeptically as he crossed his arms across his chest.

"No. I can tell just by looking at you, un. You only fight back when you have to. You'd rather heal people then hurt them."

Two hours later.

Sakura was walking on a thin dirt road that lead to a small village on the way to Konohagakure. She was planning to stop there for the night to rest and possibly get the tall, blond, man who shadowed her impeccably to stop following her around. I can't believe he's still here. I have to get rid of him.

"So, my little pink-haired muse. You still haven't told me your name, un. How are you going to inspire me if I don't know what to call you?" The hairs on the back of Sakura's neck curled as she inwardly cringed, hating herself for being too decent of a person to attack him if since he wasn't doing anything to her.

"Sakura. My name is Sakura. And. I. Am. NOT. Your. MUSE!" She bit out through gritted teeth. She heard a soft sigh as a hand patted her shoulder reassuringly, she looked up in surprise because she thought he was a few feet behind her, not next to her. Her look also showed disgust at being touched by him. Especially his hands. So casually.

"Someday, you'll realize that you are my muse and when that day comes, we'll make the greatest masterpiece ever. I'll stick around until then."