Title: Itsu Momasen Ren'ai Suru

Summary: Hikaru has always had a soft spot for Haruhi, though he's too embarrassed to admit it. Kaoru has always had a soft spot for Haruhi, but he's too shy to tell anyone. Haruhi has always loved one of the Hitachiin twins, but has never told anyone. Now, as their second year at Ouran Academy begins, and they see each other almost all the time because of class and the Host Club, feelings grow strong and the three aren't able to take it. Until, finally, one of the Hitachiin twins captures Haruhi's heart. But, unfortunately, it can't last forever.

Warnings: Language, mild violence, suggestive themes, and all the rest of the good stuff that makes Ouran High School the awesome anime it is (including distasteful humor)!

…

Haruhi sighed when she walked to Music Room #3. Tamaki had shown up at her house the other day and told her to meet the Host Club the first morning of school before classes. Something about a tradition they've done since being founded.

Yeah right, they've been a club for just two years. How could whatever they do be a tradition already? She thought, sighing again.

"Well, whatever." Haruhi opened the door to the music room, ignoring the rose petals that flew out – she was used to that already. What she hadn't been expecting was seeing all the boys – including Honey and Kyouya – in Speedos. "UWA!"

With that sound, Haruhi fell over backwards, twitching on the ground. Tamaki walked over to her and drug her inside the music room, Kyouya closing the door for the blonde-haired "king".

Haruhi shot up; her face was beat red and she was glaring at them. "What the hell is wrong with you guys?!"

Tamaki tilted his head to side innocently. "What are you talking about, Haruhi?"

"What I'm talking about are those ridiculous Speedos!" Haruhi screamed.

Honey came bouncing over to the flustered Haruhi. "Haru-Chan, Haru-Chan, look, look! I have a tan!"

"Y-Yeah, so I see, Honey-Sempai." Haruhi chuckled, trying to somehow find this not weird. But, unfortunately, compared to everything else the Host Club has done, this was an outrage and a surprise.

Mori walked over and picked up Honey. Haruhi gaped when she saw him in a Speedo. She hadn't even noticed he was there when she walked in.

"M-Mori-Sempai…?" She just continued chuckling.

"Don't look so flustered, Haruhi." Tamaki said, brushing part of his bangs back. "I know we can seem intimidating, but—"

"I JUST WANNA KNOW WHAT THE HELL YOU'RE DOING!" Haruhi screamed again.

Tamaki sighed and shook his head. "Fine, fine." He snapped his fingers. "Hikaru, Kaoru, do you have her suit ready?"

Hikaru sighed. "Listen, boss, Haruhi can't go frolicking around in a bikini if we're gonna pull this off like we did last year."

"WHAT?!" Haruhi's mouth dropped open.

Kaoru nodded. "Yeah, she'd be found out in a heartbeat."

"Nonsense!" Tamaki yelled way too passionately. "We entertained the ladies last year all wearing Speedos, so a little variation wouldn't hurt. Besides, I thin—"

Haruhi hit Tamaki upside the head. "I'm not wearing a bikini, Sempai! Now, would someone explain what's going on?"

Kyouya nodded. "Of course." He wrote something down in his book and looked at Haruhi. "Last year we decided to get the school's approval to hold a Host Club meeting before school began on the first day of the year. This, of course, was Tamaki's idea. It's sort of a summer blow out for the ladies."

"Um, isn't this a little much?" Haruhi chuckled.

"A little bit." Kaoru sighed.

Hikaru shrugged. "As long as it gets the job done though."

"That's the only reason we agreed to this embarrassment."

Kyouya sighed and pushed up his glasses. "Strangely enough, this creates more traffic than a lot of our other cosplay attempts."

"Really?" Haruhi looked up at Kyouya strangely.

"Yes." He sighed. "Well, they should be arriving shortly."

Tamaki stood up, he had been on the ground, and pumped his fist into the air. "Alright! Positions everyone!"

Haruhi sighed and stood up with Hikaru and Kaoru's help. "Thanks guys."

"No problem." They both said, walking with Haruhi over to where they were to stand and wait.

As they waited, Kaoru glanced over at Haruhi and imagined her in that pink, frilly bikini Tamaki had picked out. Due to the daydream, Kaoru blushed.

She would…look so cute in that bikini! I kinda wish that we weren't trying to keep her gender a secret. If we weren't, I'm sure we could get her into that swimsuit. Kaoru thought, his face getting more and more red.

Hikaru glanced at Haruhi. Out of nowhere, he imagined her in the bikini Tamaki had picked out. He comically fell over with a completely "Tamaki-style" landing. She would be way too adorable in that damn thing!

"Um, Hikaru?" He looked up and saw Haruhi eying him weird. "Are you okay?"

It was only then that he noticed the other hosts were staring at him with the same look of confusion. Hikaru blushed the deepest shade of red possible and started babbling nonsense as he tried explaining without explaining what had just happened.

Kaoru knew the door would be opening any second, so he walked over to Hikaru and knelt beside him. He wrapped one arm around his twin's waist and pulled him close, his other hand hovered above Hikaru's mouth. They gazed into each other's eyes longingly. And it was a good thing Kaoru did that when he did, for that moment, the doors opened.

Once the doors opened, and girls started walking in, Kaoru put the tip of his index finger on Hikaru's chin. The girls stopped, just staring at the two brothers tangled in each other's arms.

"Hikaru, please be careful from now on." Kaoru said in his most caring voice.

"I'm so sorry, Kaoru." Hikaru said sweetly in reply. "I didn't mean to worry you." He ran his hands down to his twin's chest.

"Hikaru." The finger that Kaoru had rested on Hikaru's chin traced the contours of his brother's chest until Kaoru reached Hikaru's stomach. "I don't know what I'd do if that body of yours was hurt in any way. It'd be too much to bear."

"EYAH!" The girls squealed, making a fuss and running over to the Hitachiin twins.

"Hey!" Tamaki's mouth hung open as he turned around. He pointed at the two brothers overreacting to Hikaru's little "Tamaki tumble". "Those are our customers too!"

"Actually…" Kyouya brought his finger to his lips in thought. Then he suddenly opened his book and wrote something down. "If they keep this up, and more girls come, this will be one of our best turn outs. I suggest they keep it up."

"But they do this all the time!"

"Yes, but considering their lack of clothing, I think the girls are going to be more interested in Hikaru and Kaoru than the rest of us. Especially since Haruhi is still fully clothed."

"That's right!" Tamaki grabbed Haruhi's shoulder. "Haruhi, make daddy proud and go change into that bikini!"

"What?!" Haruhi tried pulling away from him. "No, Sempai, get off!"

"Please?"

"I'm not wearing a bikini!"

Honey laughed at the two of them. "Haru-Chan won't change into a bikini Tama-Chan. You know that she's more stubborn than you."

"Come on, daddy wants to see you in a bikini!" Tamaki suddenly glomped Haruhi's head, smothering her in his chest. "Come on, please…?"

"Sempai, get off!" Haruhi struggled to get away from the extravagant "king" of the Host Club, but was failing miserably.

"Um, Haruhi?"

Haruhi managed to get away from Tamaki to see who said her name. She saw her regulars standing there. "Oh, hey ladies." She smiled at them. "Lets go get a table."

Haruhi turned around to find a table, but there were none. Just blankets laid out in a beach picnic setting. She sighed and shook her head.

"Where are the tables?" Haruhi asked Tamaki.

"Well, we are in Speedos. Metal chairs would get cold after a while." Tamaki said in his "I'm a genius" voice.

Haruhi shook her head but smiled at the three girls. "Lets go get a spot then."

The three girls nodded and followed Haruhi over to the nearest blanket. Once they sat down, they began talking. Haruhi kept them entertained with her natural charms, as always, but there came the inevitable question:

"Why are you still fully clothed, Haruhi?" One of the girl's asked.

"Yeah, that's a good question." Another girl said, nodding.

"Well, it's kinda difficult to answer that." Haruhi laughed, scratching the back of her head.

"Well, ladies, it's simple, really." Tamaki said, suddenly there. "We wanted Haruhi to wear a bikini, but he refused." He knelt down behind Haruhi and gripped her chin gently. "How adorable do you think he would be wearing a bikini? How much of his girl-like charm would overwhelm you?"

"Sempai…!" Haruhi growled. She took a breath and said, laughing, "You don't have to imagine that, ladies, you really don't have to."

But, it was too late. All three girls had imagined it, and they were all in shock.

"Oh no…" Haruhi rested her head in one of her hands.

"Well, he would look exactly like a girl." The first girl said.

"Yeah, too much like a girl." The third girl nodded.

"I don't know if I could deal with my favorite host looking like a girl." The second girl also nodded.

The three girls nodded. "We're so glad you declined it, Haruhi!"

Tamaki fell over and started twitching. "I can't win…" He sniffed as Mori was dragging him away. "It's like the gods are conspiring against me. They don't want me to see my Haruhi in a bikini…"