This is my second fanfic that isn't Ninjago. I figured there aren't enough Lucifer fanfics out there, so here I am! This is just complete randomness lol enjoy!

Hanzo Urushihara (aka Lucifer) was alone...

bored...

absolutely starving...

aaaannnnddd...

he was shopping online.

He had recently gotten in trouble with Maou and Ashiya, because he was careless and spent Maou's hard-earned money on useless junk. Maou was currently on a date with his work friend Chiho, and Ashiya was tagging along as the third wheel.

Urushihara saw an opportunity and took it; since he was left alone in the "Castle" (Maou, Ashiya, and Emilia called it the Devil's Castle, although it was only an apartment), he figured he'd get some of that good ol' online shopping done.

Only recently, he discovered amazon. It was an amazing website where he could search anything he wanted and buy it with a 2-day-shipping guaruntee and free shipping. He smirked. Maou would be proud of him for conserving money.

He had also discovered eBay... although, he did prefer amazon.

"Useless junk... more useless junk," he began scrolling down the webpage, until something caught his attention. "M and m's...?(have to write it like that cause the and sign isnt working). What is this beautiful magic...?" he began reading the reviews for the product and ended up buying it.

Later in the day, he was staring out the window, when suddenly there was a knock on the door.

"Whoever it is, go away."

Rather than the person leaving, they walked right in. Urushihara rolled his eyes and faced the person. It was the Hero Emilia.

"Ugghhh... what do you want, Emi?" Urushihara asked.

"Ashiya didn't trust you to be alone, so he asked me to come check up on you,"

"I'm fine... now you can leave," Urushihara crossed his arms, not amused.

"Look, as much as I really don't wanna be here, I have to be. I'm a Hero, after all," Emi replied.

"Yeah, yeah.. I get it. Half angel Hero Emilia, sworn enemy of King Satan. Blah blah blah..." Urushihara muttered.

"Well excUSE YOU! There's more to it than that!"

"I thought you were supposed to be a stalker and follow Maou around everywhere. Ya'know... keep him from 'taking over the world' or whatever." Urushihara crossed his arms.

The pink-haired Hero gasped. "Is Satan trying to take over the world!? Tell me, NOW! I order you to tell me everything you know!!"

"Geez, calm down, Emi. You can't order me around, first of all... and secondly, no. He isn't trying to take over the world. How would he? He works at that lame burger place down by Hatagawa Station... so remind me, how is he gonna take over the world? By working part-time at MgRonald's?"

Emilia sighed. "I hate to admit this, but...," she cringed. "You're right. I'm never saying that you're right ever again."

"Why... I'm right more than you are."

"You're a lazy pig who does nothing but sit in front of a computer and eat pork bowls and shop online." Emi said, glaring at him.

"You... you know about the shopping thing?"

"Duh..."

"Don't tell them. please don't tell them..." Urushihara begged.

"Tell who what?" asked a voice.

Urushihara and Emi turned around, and there stood Maou and Ashiya.

"Nothing!" They both said in unison.

"It sure seems like something." Ashiya crossed his arms.

"Well... since you're back, I'll get going now." Emilia ran out of the room.

They stood in silence, staring at the door.

"It seems a bit odd... like something's wrong." Urushihara said out of the blue.

"It does, doesn't it...?" Ashiya muttered in reply.

Suddenly, they heard the sound of Emilia falling down the stairs.

"Ah, there it is." Maou stated.

Urushihara nodded. "That's better."

There was another moment of silence.

"Why are you back so early...?" Urushihara asked.

"Guess." Maou looked over at Ashiya.

"Uhhhh Ashiya got tired of watching you and that Chiho girl being all lovey dovey and romantic?"

Maou blushed. "Wh-what? No... that's-"

"Exactly why we came back early." Ashiya said, finishing Maou's sentence.

Urushihara snickered. "I knew you liked her."

"She's a friend!"

"I think she's more than that." Urushihara snickered again and went back to his laptop.

A week later...

"HANZO URUSHIHARA!!!" shouted the angry voices of Hataraku Maou and Ashiya Shirou.

"Yeees?" Urushihara looked up from his laptop to see the two demons standing before him.

"Explain." Maou pointed to the door, where there were boxes stacked out into the hall.

"Uh... those have been there."

"That excuse won't work this time." Ashiya stated flatly.

"Okay, I maybe bought a few things? But I need them!" he defended.

"What the heaven (heeheehee) did you even buy?" Maou asked, opening one of the boxes and pulling out a unicorn Pillow Pet.

"HEYYY DON'T TOUCH THAT!" Urushihara snatched the pillow pet and hugged it.

Ashiya and Maou proceeded to open boxes. By the time they had finished, they found 5 pillow pets, some action figure of a black-haired swordsman dual-wielding swords (lemme know if you know who that is xD from a different anime), 27 bags of m and m's, and 38 boxes of nothing but bubble wrap.

"What is this... bubble wrap?" Maou asked, picking up a roll of it.

"I don't know, my Lord, but it appears useless," Ashiya turned to face Urushihara. "How DARE you waste King Satan's hard-earned salary on such useless garbage AGAIN."

"But I-"

"Didn't you learn your lesson last time?" Ashiya spat.

"Well, I just-"

Urushihara was cut off by the sound of popping. Ashiya and Urushihara looked at Maou, whom had popped a bubble on the bubble wrap.

"Sire! Are you alright? Are you wounded?" Ashiya asked, looking at the shocked expession on Maou's face.

"I'm fine... It's just so... so... amazing." he replied, popping it more.

Ashiya hesitantly picked up a piece of bubble wrap and began to pop it. Satisfied with the sound, the two demons spent hours upon hours popping bubble wrap, and Urushihara sat in amazement of their joy.

And that is how Urushihara got off the hook for buying useless junk.

TO MAYBE BE CONTINUED XD XD XD