Scene IV continued
TONY: (taking the champagne bottle and resting his chin on it) I think we should, uh, take this here champagne over to the fireplace and (significant pause) discuss it. (Another significant pause, as Angela smiles.)
ANGELA: Maybe we should.
TONY: Shall we? (They get to their feet. He carries the champagne bottle and she picks up their glasses. They settle into the chairs by the fireplace and smile self-consciously. Then she holds out a glass and he refills it.)
ANGELA: Thank you. (She holds out the other glass. He fills it and then takes it from her.)
TONY: Thank you.
ANGELA: You're welcome.
TONY: Well, that's the champagne.
ANGELA: And now for the discussion.
TONY: (quietly) Yeah. Do you still want me to go first?
ANGELA: Please.
TONY: (nervously) What was the question again?
ANGELA: What exactly do you think we are? (Tony takes a deep breath.)
TONY: Well, I think we're friends.
ANGELA: (trying to hide her disappointment) I see.
TONY: I mean, not just friends.
ANGELA: Oh?
TONY: Good friends. Really good friends.
ANGELA: Best friends?
TONY: Yeah. Definitely.
ANGELA: (with mixed feelings) Yes, we are.
TONY: I never had a girl, sorry, a woman for a best friend before.
ANGELA: What about Marie?
TONY: Well, she was my wife. That's a special category.
ANGELA: Right.
TONY: Were you and Michael best friends?
ANGELA: No. I could never talk to him like I can with you.
TONY: Oh.
ANGELA: I mean how I usually can. This discussion isn't one of our easiest.
TONY: Yeah. (He takes another deep breath.) The thing about men and women being friends is, well, sometimes certain feelings can, uh, get in the way.
ANGELA: Right. Look, Tony, if I've misread things, I'm really sorry. I would never want you to feel pressured by what you think I think you think—
TONY: Huh?
ANGELA: Tony, I thought, well, we had, well, a certain connection—
TONY: We do!
ANGELA: I mean a, well, a romantic connection.
TONY: (as it sinks in) Oh. (He sets down the champagne bottle and his glass.)
ANGELA: But obviously that was wishful thinking on my part. And I'm sorry. (She gets to her feet.) I'll go do the dishes.
TONY: Angela, the dishes can wait. And it's my job anyway.
ANGELA: Tony, for one night can you forget you're my housekeeper?
TONY: Angela, if I could forget that, don't you think Anthony and Ingrid would've had a better reunion in that motel?
ANGELA: What?
TONY: You know, when we shared a bed. The second time I mean.
ANGELA: The first time doesn't count. I didn't even know you were there.
TONY: Right. But you knew I was there in that motel. And I really knew you were there!
ANGELA: Oh! But why didn't you—I mean, was it just because you didn't want to ruin our friendship?
TONY: Yeah, partly. And also, well, you're my boss. And I look up to you.
ANGELA: (sinking into the chair again) Oh.
TONY: (shaking his head) Even when it seems like we're on the same level we're not. You can try to come down to mine, but it's still like— (He sits on the floor.) I'm still below you.
ANGELA: Tony, I don't see us that way. I see us as equals.
TONY: (looking up at her) Do you?
ANGELA: (softly) Yes.
TONY: What about everyone else?
ANGELA: I don't see anyone else here. (She sits on the floor beside him, setting her glass next to the fireplace.) Tony, I'm not saying there aren't obstacles. I'm not blind. But the way I feel about you is more important.
TONY: How do you feel?
ANGELA: (taking his hand) Like this.
TONY: You feel soft.
ANGELA: Thank you.
TONY: I've got dish-panned hands.
ANGELA: I don't care. (She lifts his hand to her lips and kisses it. He smiles.)
TONY: And housemaid's knee.
ANGELA: (concerned) You do?
TONY: No, that was a joke. And an invitation for you to put your hand on my knee.
ANGELA: (smiling) Oh. (She puts her other hand on his knee.) Any other work-related injuries?
TONY: Well, I might have to report you to OSHA for the time my lips got chapped taking the garbage out in the snow.
ANGELA: (mischievously) I've been a bad, bad boss.
TONY: Nah, you've been great. Not too quick at taking hints though.
ANGELA: Oh, right. (She kisses his mouth and he kisses back. It's a soft, tender kiss, then they break apart, smiling.) Is this getting in the way of our friendship?
TONY: (shrugging) Too soon to tell.
ANGELA: (nodding) OK. You know, if we have feelings, maybe acknowledging them is healthier than trying to ignore them.
TONY: Yeah, maybe. Depends on the feelings.
ANGELA: So what are you feeling?
TONY: A little tingly actually.
ANGELA: Me, too. (They look into each other's eyes and then grab each other and start kissing passionately.)
(Cut to kitchen where Mona enters from outside, holding her metal pail.)
MONA: (muttering to herself) Some clambake. (She closes the door to outside.) I wonder how the dinner's going. (She goes to the swinging door and starts to open it.)
(Cut back to living room, where Tony and Angela are still kissing passionately. Mona appears in the doorway, looking as if she's about to speak. Then she sees the couple by the fireplace. She looks stunned, then amused, and then pleased. She exits quietly.)
ANGELA: (breaking apart from Tony) Did you hear something?
TONY: That was me. I breathe a little heavy at times like this.
ANGELA: No, I know that was you. But I thought I heard someone.
TONY: I don't see anyone else here.
ANGELA: You're right. I just, well, I feel a little self-conscious in the living room. What if Mother comes back early?
TONY: (sighing) I knew this felt too much like high school.
ANGELA: Maybe your high school days.
TONY: Right. Mona would probably be happy you're gettin' lucky.
ANGELA: (hitting his leg) Tony!
TONY: Ay, watch the knee!
ANGELA: (shaking her head) You're right though. She would think that.
TONY: Is that all this is to you, a one-night stand?
ANGELA: No, of course not. You're very special to me.
TONY: Angela, I was kidding again.
ANGELA: Oh.
TONY: Besides, we have to do a little more for it to count as "gettin' lucky."
ANGELA: A little more?
TONY: OK, a lot more.
ANGELA: How much more do you want to do?
TONY: How much more do you want to do?
ANGELA: I asked you first.
TONY: Well, if this isn't just one night, then we don't have to do all I want to do tonight. (giving the "Tony the stud" look) Actually, we don't have enough time in one night for all that I want to do.
ANGELA: (using her "seductive Angela" voice) You wouldn't have enough energy to do all that I want to do. Not in one night.
TONY: I'm gettin' the feeling that this is a discussion we should carry on somewhere more private. Just in case Mona gets back before dawn.
ANGELA: Good idea. Your place or mine?
TONY: Whichever's closest.
ANGELA: My, aren't you eager?
TONY: Well, that and I'm gonna carry you upstairs.
ANGELA: (both seductive and flattered) You are?
TONY: Yeah. If I can figure out to lift you when we're both on the floor.
ANGELA: Would it help if I raised my bottom? (Tony looks like he's going to say something smutty and then thinks better of it.)
TONY: Yeah, thanks. (They awkwardly maneuver so that she's in his arms. He tries to get to his feet but then collapses with a groan. She falls out of his arms and he curls up on the floor.)
ANGELA: Tony! Oh God, I knew I shouldn't have had seconds!
TONY: Angela, no, it's not that—It's my stomach! It's killing me!
ANGELA: (putting her hands to her face) Oh my God, I poisoned you!
TONY: No. Oh!
ANGELA: (putting her hand to his forehead) Oh God! You're burning up! I'm calling the doctor! I don't want to hear any macho arguments from you. You are too sick! You need professional attention and I—
TONY: (holding up his hand in protest) Angela, could you call a doctor?
ANGELA: Right. (She scrambles to her feet and goes to the phone. She starts pushing the buttons.)
TONY: (moaning in pain) Oh, Angela, oh! OH GOD!
ANGELA: (into the phone) No, it's not what you think!
[Scene V is unchanged.]
Scene VI
(Angela enters the kitchen in her blue bathrobe, looking like she didn't sleep well. She's carrying the champagne glasses, plates, and silverware from the night before. She sighs and starts doing the dishes. Mona enters from outside.)
MONA: Angela, are you doing housework?
ANGELA: No, Mother, I'm kayaking.
MONA: Well, I'm just surprised. First cooking and now dish-washing? What other wild new things have you been trying? (Angela looks at her suspiciously, wondering how much she knows.)
ANGELA: I'm just trying to spare Tony dish-panned hands.
MONA: How sweet. Is that part of your anniversary gift?
ANGELA: Yes, sort of.
MONA: And what did he give you, Dear?
ANGELA: The scare of a lifetime.
MONA: Oh, come on, Angela, you've been with a man before. Not recently of course.
ANGELA: No, Mother, his appendix burst.
MONA: What did you do to that poor boy?
ANGELA: Nothing! Well, he did try to lift me off the floor, but the doctor said that was unrelated.
MONA: And what were you doing on the floor, Dear?
ANGELA: Mother, I heard you at the door last night. I didn't see you, but I'm sure you saw us.
MONA: Just the kissing.
ANGELA: That's all there was!
MONA: So why was he trying to lift you off the floor?
ANGELA: It doesn't matter. Not compared to what happened next.
MONA: So you weren't kidding about the appendix?
ANGELA: No, they took it out at two o'clock this morning.
MONA: Oh, poor Tony!
ANGELA: He's going to be all right. The doctor said he'll sleep for another eight hours and then I can visit.
MONA: And how are you feeling?
ANGELA: Fine. Well, I need more sleep, but fine.
MONA: Don't you feel guilty?
ANGELA: Guilty?
MONA: Come on, Angela, I know you. You finally gave in to your feelings for Tony, even if it was just smooching, and then this happens.
ANGELA: Well, yes, if you put it that way. (She leaves the sink and sits down in a kitchen chair.) And that's not all.
MONA: (eagerly) Yeah? So there's some good stuff?
ANGELA: (slowly) It's sort of good. Not like that. But, well.
MONA: Spill, Angela!
ANGELA: Tony told me he loved me.
MONA: (smiling) Aha. So the plot thickens. And what did you say to him?
ANGELA: Nothing. He was unconscious at the time.
MONA: (disappointed) Well, that explains it.
ANGELA: (scolding) Mother.
MONA: Angela, how do you feel about him?
ANGELA: That's what we were trying to figure out before his appendix burst.
MONA: Now that's bad timing.
ANGELA: (quietly) Yes.
MONA: I bet you can't wait till he recovers.
ANGELA: Mother!
Scene VII revised
NURSE: …She never got jumpy till you said you loved her.
TONY: (spitting out the thermometer) I—I said what? I said that?
NURSE: (picking up the thermometer and putting it back in Tony's mouth) Yeah, surprised her, too.
TONY: (with the thermometer in his mouth) I didn't wanna tell her like that. And I don't know how she feels. (taking the thermometer out) Oh, what am I gonna do?
NURSE: (taking the thermometer again) You're going to put this thermometer in your mouth so I can finish your chart and go home. (She puts it back in.)
TONY: I mean, I know she has feelings for me. (He takes the thermometer out again.) But I don't know how much of that was physical last night. Well, not as physical as we wanted.
NURSE: (taking the thermometer again and waving it) I'm warning you, Buddy. One more peep and I'm going to take a different approach with this thing. (Tony silently opens his mouth wide. She puts the thermometer back in. Tony shuts his mouth tight. Angela enters with a pot of daffodils.)
ANGELA: Hi. (Tony waves and murmurs hi. The nurse looks at both of them.)
NURSE: (taking the thermometer out) Forget it. (She puts her other hand on Tony's forehead.) 98.6. (to Angela) Try to keep it at that level.
TONY: Ay-oh, oh-ay! (Nurse exits.)
ANGELA: (holding out the flowers to Tony) These are for you
TONY: Oh, gee, Angela, I love daffodils.
ANGELA: Good. Mother tried to talk me into roses. She thought they would be more appropriate.
TONY: Oh. Oh! So she knows?
ANGELA: She knows we kissed.
TONY: Right. So, uh, what do daffodils represent?
ANGELA: Well, sometimes unrequited luh—feelings.
TONY: (shaking his head) Not appropriate.
ANGELA: (smiling) And sometimes regard.
TONY: So you hold me in high regard?
ANGELA: Yes. (She sets the flowers on the table.)
TONY: But not enough for roses?
ANGELA: Well, the problem with roses is that every color represents something different.
TONY: Like?
ANGELA: Well, white is for purity and, and weddings.
TONY: Not appropriate. I mean—
ANGELA: Right. And yellow is for jealousy and infidelity.
TONY: Even with daffodils?
ANGELA: No, just roses.
TONY: Well, that doesn't really work for us. Not that we haven't dealt with insane jealousy.
ANGELA: Well, you are Italian.
TONY: (smiling) I meant you.
ANGELA: (smiling) Of course. And pink, although it's my favorite, is for platonic friendship.
TONY: Not appropriate.
ANGELA: Right. And I didn't know if we were ready for red. That means—
TONY: I know what it means, Angela.
ANGELA: OK. So, Tony, what does all this mean to you?
TONY: I think it means we have a lot to discuss when I get out of the hospital. (Angela grins and nods. Then she looks like she wants to say something important, but instead she takes his hand and squeezes it.)
ANGELA: I'll let you get some rest.
TONY: I'm gonna need it! I mean, for my recovery.
ANGELA: Of course. (Their eyes meet and the sparks fly.)
(The closing credits roll.)