Peach: The Mighty Matchmaker

(Note: I took this down and edited it a little bit because I hadn't gone and looked at it in a long time. This was originally in a set of one-shots that were all together as a collection, but I took that down and decided to edit them before posting them separately. A Peach-centric story with a Samus/Marth pairing...fun fun fun! And the game was a popular e-mail that was going around at the time I originally wrote this. I still think it's kinda lame, but whatever. Maybe someone out there will like it. Anything that has been previously copyrighted is not mine.)

As she flipped through her diary (sorry, journal – bounty hunters don't keep diaries), Samus reflected. She was pathetic. All of the girls in the Smash Mansion (Zelda, Sheik, Peach, and Nana) knew about – and swore to never tell about – her "crush on Roy", as Peach put it so bluntly. (Yes, Peach used the quotation marks too.) She walked to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. "Come on, girl," she said to herself. "You can do this. Today's the day. You are going to tell Roy how you really feel about him. It'll be easy. You just walk up to him and – "

"Walk up to who, Sammie?" Samus yelped and whirled around to find Peach standing there in all of her Mushroom glory.

"Well, I – um, well… er…" Samus stuttered.

"You're not thinking about Roy again, are you?"

Samus sighed and turned back to the mirror. She leaned on the sink, causing her long blonde hair to cascade in front of her emerald eyes. "I don't know, Peach," she said. "I've never been scared of anything. This is just so weird for me."

"I still think you're hiding something and using Roy as an excuse, but that's just my opinion." Peach wagged a finger at her friend, a knowing gleam in her eyes. "Roy? I mean, really. You've GOT to be aiming higher than that. Just because you're afraid of reaching the good apple at the top of the tree doesn't mean you should settle for the ones on the lower branches."

Samus blinked. "Look, Peach, I appreciate your concern, but I don't need a lecture right now, I need a fortune teller."

"Well then, how about we play a game?" Peach handed Samus a piece of paper and a pen. "Number the paper one through eleven," she commanded. Raising an eyebrow, the bounty hunter complied. Samus knew better than to argue with the mushroom princess. "Now, next to the numbers 1 and 2, write two random single-digit numbers."

1 - 2
2 - 3

"Now, next to 3 and 7, write the names of two people of the opposite gender."

3 - Marth
7 - Roy

"Next to the numbers 4 through 6, write the names of some of your friends."

4 - Link
5 - Peach
6 - Zelda

"For 8 through 11, write four randomly-picked song titles."

8 - Accidentally In Love (by Couting Crows)
9 - He Drives Me Crazy (by Britney Spears)
10 - Blvd. of Broken Dreams (by Green Day)
11 - BYou (by Sabrina Bryan)

Peach looked at the results and smiled. "The answer for number 1 is the number of kids you will have in the future."

Samus was shocked. She didn't think she'd ever have kids!

"The second number is the number of people you have to tell about this game."

Okay, yeah. That was acceptable in Samus's mind.

"The person you wrote for 3 is your true love."

Samus balked. Marth? But Samus had convinced herself that she liked Roy! And yet...maybe...

"The person for number 4 is the person you care about most."

Samus smiled; Link had been like a brother to her ever since she got accepted into the Smash Mansion. Sure, there was a bit of tension during baseball…

"Number 5 is the person who knows you best." Peach smiled. "That's totally me!"

Samus laughed. "Got that right, Peachie!"

Peach giggled a little bit, then went back to the results. "The person at number 6 is your lucky star."

Samus couldn't agree more. Good ol' Zelly always had her back.

"Number 7 is someone you really like, but don't understand."

Samus pondered this. Now that she thought about it, what did she see in Roy? Then it hit her. She was hiding. She was in love with Marth, but wasn't sure how to tell him. Naturally, she settled for second best because she was scared to go for quality. Peach had been right the whole time...

"The song for number 8 describes your feeling about the person in number 3." Peach's eyes got all misty. "Awww…'Accidentally in Love' witrh Marthy-kun? That is so KAWAII!"

Samus growled. Bounty hunters are not "kawaii". "Where on earth did you get this game from, Peach?"

Peach giggled. "From Empress Caroline. It's a popular e-mail that got sent to her a while ago. She's been wanting to use it in a story ever since."

Samus quirked an eyebrow. "...okay...continue on."

"The song for number 9 describes your feelings for the person in number 7."

Samus chuckled. Roy did drive her crazy!

"The song for number 10 describes the way you feel life goes on in your mind."

Samus's smile faded fast as she remembered her past life before the Smash song lyrics played through her head: I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have ever known…

"The song for number 11 describes your outlook on life in general." Peach's eyes lit up. "I love that song! You just gotta be you, and nobody else…" The Mushroom Princess was singing and dancing, thoroughly enjoying herself and not caring that Samus was in the room.

Samus rolled her eyes and left the room. "See you around, Sabrina Bryan," she called out.

Ignoring Peach's cries of "No, Sammie, come back!" she opened the door and walked down the hall towards the training room, meeting Marth on the way. "Hello, Sam-chan." The prince waved and walked away.

"Hi, Marth." Suddenly, Samus stopped in her tracks, stood there for a few seconds, then turned around and ran after him.

Marth stopped when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Turning his head, he could see Samus out of the corner of his eye. "Sam-chan? Can I...help you with something?"

"Marth?" Samus asked. "Would you like to play a game?"

Peach stood at the other end of the hallway, smiling to herself. Her plan was working perfectly. The Mighty Matchmaker strikes again!