Disclaimer: RENT and its characters do not belong to me. Neither does the story title, because that's a song.
Author's notes: Just a short dialogue I wrote that was inspired by a particular horrible mood that I was in and probably most of the movies I was watching as I tried to get over it. And I'm not telling you who's talking until the end. It's really up to you to decide how they are talking and such, which will probably be easier once you know who was talking, but the entire story is meant to take place over a long period of time. Each page break aside the ones separating my notes from the beginning and the end of the story signifies a longer period of silence.
I got the title from the song "Keep Me In Your Heart" by Warren Zevon.
Keep Me In Your Heart
"Hey."
"Hey."
"How are you doing?"
"I'm not feeling anything. Tired, I guess…but I don't want to go to sleep…the doctor said that when I go to sleep I'm not gonna wake up again."
"Oh."
"Yeah. I was just waiting to say goodbye."
"To who?"
"Everyone…you."
"I'm sorry I couldn't get here sooner."
"It's OK."
"No, it's not. You've been here for a week."
"You were across the country."
"I should have been here the second I got the call."
"It's fine. I'm dying, you're not allowed to argue with me."
"How did this happen?"
"I think it has to do with the way that the police car ran into me…and then over me."
"Well, I don't know about you, but I intend on writing the city a very strongly worded letter about all of this."
"Don't make me laugh. It hurts."
"I thought you said that you weren't feeling anything."
"That was before you showed up."
"Don't say things like that. Don't act like you're dying and this is the last time that we're going to talk."
"But I am. And it is."
"But it doesn't have to be. I mean haven't you defied medical knowledge by being here all week? Why can't you do it for one more night? I mean if you can do that --."
"I'm here because I needed to see you. I needed to say goodbye, not because I have some overwhelming reason to stay alive. I just needed to tell you that I love you."
"Can't that be reason enough."
"Not when I know you don't feel the same way."
"That doesn't change the fact that I don't want you to leave. How can you just let go like this?"
"I haven't let go yet."
"I'm scared."
"So am I."
"Well I'm trying to deal with the fact that the next time I close my eyes they aren't going to open again."
"So am I…what am I supposed to do without you?"
"The same thing you were doing out in California."
"Don't put this on me. Even if I were here this could have happ--."
"You get up every morning, and you go about your day, and then you call back here, and check in with the others. And then you go to bed and do the same thing the next day when you wake up in the morning."
"I don't want to do that without you."
"Well I don't want to leave you here."
"Then don't."
"I have to. The machines can't keep me alive forever…the doctors can't repair the damage…it'll be easier if I just let go now."
"How is you letting go easy at all?"
"It's not supposed to be."
"I'm tired. I think it's time for me to go to sleep."
"No. You can't."
"I have to."
"You can't just stay alive long enough to tell me that you love me, and then just die."
"If it were that easy for me to stay alive, then I would. But I'm tired of holding on."
"Just a little bit longer. Do it for me."
"I'm sorry…I can't. I've been fighting for so long…I don't have the strength to fight anymore."
"So I guess this is goodbye."
"No. You have to promise me that you won't say goodbye, because I'm not gonna be gone. I won't be around, but Angel isn't around, and you and I both know that Angel isn't gone. You can't say goodbye."
"If it isn't a goodbye then what is it?"
"I don't know…I just can't hear goodbye."
"Then I won't say it."
"I guess goodnight is a good option, seeing as how you're going to sleep. In any case…I'm really sorry that I couldn't get here sooner, that I made you hold on like that, but I'm glad you did. I don't know if I would have had the strength to do it. Because I don't even have the strength to tell you that I love you too. I could just sit here and watch you lay there, but then had to go and say that. You had to go and make it harder. Because I do love you, and I hate you for it. I hate that you cans ay that and just leave…but I love you even more for the strength it took. I'm going to miss you. Good—goodnight."
Roger exited the hospital room into the hall numbly. Four chairs just outside the room were occupied; Collins Maureen, Joanne and Benny were sitting there, in a quiet air of sadness. They all looked over when he approached. "He's gone…Mark is gone…" He trailed off as tears started to roll down his face. Collins stood and enveloped him into a strong hug. "Mark is gone."
Auxiliary Author's Notes: To clear a few things up, Roger was in California because when he started a band again, a bit after the end of the movie/show, they (the band as well as the bohemians) made the decision that they would have better luck getting work out there. Mimi died before he got into this band, it was her death that made him really get back into music with a band and such.
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