TITLE: Over her
AUTHOR: Gabriele Schulz
EMAIL: gabi@gschulz.de
RATING: PG (might go up)
DISTRIBUTION: Everyone who has my general permission. Others please ask first.
SPOILERS: Up to Selfless
FEEDBACK: Love it. Especially if you like the story ;-)
SUMMARY: On Buffy's 25th birthday Giles visits Sunnydale, finally over her. Or so he thinks.
COUPLES: Buffy/Giles, Willow/Anya, Dawn/OC (male), mention of Wesley/Faith, Cordelia/Angel
DISCLAIMER: The characters are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar Productions, Kuzui Enterprises, 20th Century Fox Television, the WB Television Network, and whoever else may have a hold on them. I do not mean to infringe upon any copyrights.
DATE: 11/05/02
--------------------------
He was over her.
Rupert Giles sat in a taxi cab, waiting to arrive at the familiar house on Revello Drive. She would be there. Buffy Summers, his Slayer, the woman he had loved in every way possible, the woman who had brought him the greatest happiness and the deepest despair. But all of that was in the past.
She was still Buffy Summers, but she hadn't been his Slayer for over four years and although he would always love her, he had moved on from those feelings that kept him in limbo between hope and disappointment for so many years.
Yes, he was over her.
This didn't mean that he wasn't a bit nervous about seeing her again. It had been half a year since they'd last met. She'd looked so young and beautiful with the flowers in her dark hair, smiling a bit nervously while they had both held the young girl that was to be their Goddaughter. He remembered the aching he had felt for her. Endless fantasies, in which they weren't holding the daughter of their best friends, but their own child. He was glad that it wouldn't happen again.
Because he was over her.
Would she still have dark hair? He wasn't quite sure if she had stopped dying it because of Michael. Maybe she had gone back to blonde after their break-up. He had like it. The hair, not the break-up. Although of course when he had heard of their split he had felt the all too familiar rising of hope in his chest. He had called her to offer his support and comfort, but she had been quite calm. It was painful, but it would pass. He had agreed, wondering silently how long it would take her to be fully over it, to be finally ready for his chance to offer all his love and affection.
"Some things just aren't meant to be."
That had been her words. She had talked about her and Michael of course but somewhere in his brain a different connection had been made. He knew the feeling all too well. He had loved her for many years and there had always been something that had kept him from telling her how he felt. He had always been waiting for her to be in a relationship that would last and free him by taking away all his hopes to be with her. Or for her to get over one of these relationships once they had failed so that he could make his move. But whenever he had thought things were close to either, something had changed. Her relationship had taken a turn for worse or she had met someone new (or old).
It had just never been meant to be.
And at that moment he had realized that it never would. For seven years he had waited for something to liberate him from this place between heaven and hell and he suddenly knew that the only one who could end his torment was himself. Buffy wouldn't rearrange her life to fit his needs, nor would the men who met her not fall in love with her simply because he had waited for his chance for so many years. If he wanted to live his own life in full, including the romance that he had hoped in vain to find with Buffy, he had to stop waiting for her.
And he had.
He had deepened the on-again-off-again relationship with Caroline and for the first time since Jenny had tried to commit himself to someone other than Buffy. And if he was honest with himself, even with Jenny he had held back some part of him that was reserved strictly for his Slayer. It had been liberating indeed. The month after his "epiphany" had been one of the happiest in his life. Unfortunately the three and a half months after that had shown him that his commitment alone wouldn't make a relationship work. They hadn't officially parted ways yet, but it was only a matter of time.
Not that that changed anything.
That first month with Caroline had shown him that leaving Buffy behind and moving on was the right decision. Eventually he would meet someone who would love him and accept him and his calling. He was looking forward to dating again. With Buffy there could never be a slow "getting to know each other". There couldn't be a gradual build-up of feelings. He was hers heart, body and soul. Had been. Because he now he was free again to meet her without this overwhelming love overshadowing any thought he had. He was really looking forward to seeing her again.
Because he was over her.
AUTHOR: Gabriele Schulz
EMAIL: gabi@gschulz.de
RATING: PG (might go up)
DISTRIBUTION: Everyone who has my general permission. Others please ask first.
SPOILERS: Up to Selfless
FEEDBACK: Love it. Especially if you like the story ;-)
SUMMARY: On Buffy's 25th birthday Giles visits Sunnydale, finally over her. Or so he thinks.
COUPLES: Buffy/Giles, Willow/Anya, Dawn/OC (male), mention of Wesley/Faith, Cordelia/Angel
DISCLAIMER: The characters are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar Productions, Kuzui Enterprises, 20th Century Fox Television, the WB Television Network, and whoever else may have a hold on them. I do not mean to infringe upon any copyrights.
DATE: 11/05/02
--------------------------
He was over her.
Rupert Giles sat in a taxi cab, waiting to arrive at the familiar house on Revello Drive. She would be there. Buffy Summers, his Slayer, the woman he had loved in every way possible, the woman who had brought him the greatest happiness and the deepest despair. But all of that was in the past.
She was still Buffy Summers, but she hadn't been his Slayer for over four years and although he would always love her, he had moved on from those feelings that kept him in limbo between hope and disappointment for so many years.
Yes, he was over her.
This didn't mean that he wasn't a bit nervous about seeing her again. It had been half a year since they'd last met. She'd looked so young and beautiful with the flowers in her dark hair, smiling a bit nervously while they had both held the young girl that was to be their Goddaughter. He remembered the aching he had felt for her. Endless fantasies, in which they weren't holding the daughter of their best friends, but their own child. He was glad that it wouldn't happen again.
Because he was over her.
Would she still have dark hair? He wasn't quite sure if she had stopped dying it because of Michael. Maybe she had gone back to blonde after their break-up. He had like it. The hair, not the break-up. Although of course when he had heard of their split he had felt the all too familiar rising of hope in his chest. He had called her to offer his support and comfort, but she had been quite calm. It was painful, but it would pass. He had agreed, wondering silently how long it would take her to be fully over it, to be finally ready for his chance to offer all his love and affection.
"Some things just aren't meant to be."
That had been her words. She had talked about her and Michael of course but somewhere in his brain a different connection had been made. He knew the feeling all too well. He had loved her for many years and there had always been something that had kept him from telling her how he felt. He had always been waiting for her to be in a relationship that would last and free him by taking away all his hopes to be with her. Or for her to get over one of these relationships once they had failed so that he could make his move. But whenever he had thought things were close to either, something had changed. Her relationship had taken a turn for worse or she had met someone new (or old).
It had just never been meant to be.
And at that moment he had realized that it never would. For seven years he had waited for something to liberate him from this place between heaven and hell and he suddenly knew that the only one who could end his torment was himself. Buffy wouldn't rearrange her life to fit his needs, nor would the men who met her not fall in love with her simply because he had waited for his chance for so many years. If he wanted to live his own life in full, including the romance that he had hoped in vain to find with Buffy, he had to stop waiting for her.
And he had.
He had deepened the on-again-off-again relationship with Caroline and for the first time since Jenny had tried to commit himself to someone other than Buffy. And if he was honest with himself, even with Jenny he had held back some part of him that was reserved strictly for his Slayer. It had been liberating indeed. The month after his "epiphany" had been one of the happiest in his life. Unfortunately the three and a half months after that had shown him that his commitment alone wouldn't make a relationship work. They hadn't officially parted ways yet, but it was only a matter of time.
Not that that changed anything.
That first month with Caroline had shown him that leaving Buffy behind and moving on was the right decision. Eventually he would meet someone who would love him and accept him and his calling. He was looking forward to dating again. With Buffy there could never be a slow "getting to know each other". There couldn't be a gradual build-up of feelings. He was hers heart, body and soul. Had been. Because he now he was free again to meet her without this overwhelming love overshadowing any thought he had. He was really looking forward to seeing her again.
Because he was over her.