Title: Cherish
Summery: Post Knockdown fluff most likely. No clue where I'm going with this but it seems like a decent place to start.
My first foray, ever, into any kind of fic. I'm so scared to pull the trigger and post. I welcome all feedback. Be it hearty applause or screams to never, ever, write a sentence again. I'm a big girl. I can take it.
No beta. All mistakes are mine. Unfortunately I don't own Castle. If I did we wouldn't be waiting 4 months for a conclusion. Vacation? They don't need no stinking vacation! Also, I'd probably be so busy fan-girling over Nathan that Castle would be a pretty craptacular show. So it's probably a good thing. All things considered.
Time slowed, sound blurred. The screams of the other funeral goers dulled into a slight hum. As Kate's eye fluttered shut a piece of Richard Castle heart crumbled.
He stared in disbelief. His partner, his best friend, his 'one-and-done' if he were to use her words and be completely honest with himself. So full of life and always quick with a light-hearted comeback or an affectionate scolding was still. It unnerved him. Although he knew the dangers of her job, he never really thought this day would come. They had always escaped in the nick of time. A phone call seconds before a bomb went off, a well-placed heel to the wrist, a risky but successful pull on a bunch of wires. Somewhere in his writer's mind he always thought that the universe was pulling for them and that no real harm could come to them if they were together. He watched some loose tendrils of her hair flutter in the breeze and smelled the fresh cut grass mingling with the acrid scent of blood, her blood, and felt a wave of nausea take him over. Still, she was so still.
He was jolted out of his daze by a rough pull on his shoulders. Esposito was throwing him out of the way.
"Castle, you have to move! Let Lanie help her!"
Numbly he stood up and scanned the cemetery for his family. His mother, Martha and daughter Alexis were being ushered to a car by Detective Ryan. Most of the gatherers were running from the scene, some of the officers heading in the direction from where the shot had been fired. He took a deep breath to quell the sick feeling in his stomach and satisfied that his family was in good hands he returned his attention to his partner laying on the grass. Right before she had closed her eyes he had told her he loved her. He saw a moment of recognition and detected a hint of a smile. If only, he thought. Would any of the horrific events of the past two days have happened if he had had the courage to tell her his true feelings when he had confronted her about her mother's case the other night? He had called her a coward. Accused her of hiding in relationships with men she didn't love. But was he really any better? Friend. Partner. That is what he had said. She had all but told him to make the first move when she had asked if that is what they were. He saw it in her eyes, she was almost daring him to say, what they both already knew, out aloud. This was their dance. Meaningful looks, hushed conversations in out-of-town hotel rooms, promises of 'always' and missed opportunities. Each of them were terrified of being hurt, of being rejected. And so they never quite pulled the trigger. It took a bullet for him to crack. He almost smiled at the analogy his mind had come up with. Almost. He feared he had just experienced their last missed opportunity. A gasp and a splutter stole him out of his reverie.
I haven't lost her, she still with me! He crouched down beside her and held her cool hand. He heard the sirens drawing near, saw a renewed rush of people around him and squeezed her hand. He felt the faintest of clasps in return and the world sped back up again.
"Kate, hold on. We don't end this way. Do you hear me? I can't re-write this ending either but you are sure as hell going to try."
Her eyelashes fluttered and her grip tightened. She was fighting. His heart-rate sped up as hope spread throughout his chest.
Maybe the universe was still pulling for them.
"Come on Castle, let the EMTs do their job." Esposito said, this time more gently pulling him away. "Let us take you to the hospital" Lanie tugged his other sleeve and they led him to the car. He offered a watery smile, grateful for his friends concern and watched as Kate was loaded on to the waiting ambulance.
Esposito watched as Castle's eyes filled once again with fresh tears. "You know bro, when she wakes up, she is gonna kick your ass for declaring your love in front of the entire precinct." He shoved aside his own fears and put on his best smirk, hoping to allay some of the writer's pain.
Castle let out a small chuckle as he jumped into the backseat of the car, "I can take an ass-kicking, if it means she's at my side. I'll take a thousand ass-kickings."
Okay, so there you have it. The first thing I have put down on paper in probably 10 years. More? Stop immediately?