AU from 5x02 where Castle goes home after Beckett has forgiven him. Inspired by Jason Derulo's song Want To Want Me. Submitted for Castle Fanfic Monday
Out of respect, he wanted to give her some space. She said she wasn't ready after the whole interlude with Kristina Coterra and if he's being completely honest with himself, he can't blame her. If the situation had been reversed, if he had somehow walked in on Kate with another man on top of her, he would have been more than a little miffed. Oh, who is he trying to kid, he would have been out of his mind. No one compares to Kate, he has known this for quite a while, has been aware of just how extraordinary she is since the first case they've ever worked together. He never thought it would be possible to think more highly of this woman but he now knows that no one will ever come close to comparing to Kate Beckett. The start of their relationship has shown him that. She's more open than he ever would have imagined her to be, she's… more, in every sense of the word.
And now he's here. Stripped down to nothing, lying in bed and admittedly cursing his decision to give her some space for the night. Even if she hadn't been ready to cross that line with him tonight –not that there is much of a line left to cross, they've made sure of that over the past month, given her suspension – he still wishes he could be with her. Castle never thought Kate would be one to cuddle but the past month has shown him otherwise. She craves his touch, reaches out for him blindly in the night and wraps his arms around her, preferring the warmth his body emanates as opposed to that of the thick comforter.
Recalling just how warm they'd both been a couple of nights ago when they'd taken advantage of an empty loft, brings Castle back to the present, only to realize how hot it is. Kate's absence should leave him cold, empty, void, but instead he finds himself burning. Burning for her touch, her lips, the press of her body against his, the way her slender curves fit his so well. Beads of sweat coalesce on his forehead, and he can feel a wet trail making its way down the curve of his back. He pushes his sheets to the floor.
No.
He promised her space and four years prior to the start of their relationship he was able to give her just that. Why does the concept of space seem so elusive now? Evidently it's because he knows. He knows what he's missing out on. He knows that while he's here in his empty loft, lying naked on his bed with the sheets on the floor, he could be with her. He should not be finding himself in this predicament. He pays a large bill each month to keep air conditioning in his home and he should not be considering leaving it because he can't seem to regulate his body temperature in the absence of Kate's presence. In this moment, he'll concede that ignorance really I bliss because if only he didn't know-
A text notification startles Castle from his inner turmoil. He reads the text and if his temperature wasn't already well above average, it is now.
I wish you hadn't left.
Castle doesn't bother answering her and blindly reaches for the sheets only to realize they are already piled on the floor. He gets up faster than he did when he realized his mother was home the morning after his and Kate's first night together. Her text has sent his restraint out the door and if that wasn't an open invitation back to her place, he doesn't know what is. God, he loves her. Only he can't tell her that yet because he knows she isn't ready to hear those words. Though it does nothing to subdue his feelings.
She knows him. Knows him well enough to send a text because she's aware he wouldn't want to push her. And now he can't pull on his pants fast enough to get to her. He wants her, more than he's ever wanted any other woman before and his need for her, his effervescent hunger hasn't simmered down since they've been together. No, it's continued to heat, to intensify, to fill his body to the brim and threaten to overflow like boiling water on a stove. There is no taming the heat Kate Beckett has unleashed in him.
With his jeans on and his shirt half buttoned up, Castle barely remembers to grab his wallet from the nightstand as he rushes to the door. His left foot is half way out the door and where are his keys? He grumbles as he reaches back into his apartment towards the key holder, leaving his foot outside because he refuses to stay one more moment in his home without her. Deeming the wait for the elevator too lengthy he hastens his pace and heads for the stairs, taking them two at a time before he makes it to the lobby. He pushes past the door that leads to the main floor and earns himself and puzzled look from Eduardo as he opens the door for Castle in advance, recognizing his rush to leave.
"Everything okay, ?" the doorman asks just as Rick manages to hail a cab.
Castle barely has time to answer as he practically dives into the cab but lets out a "Fine!" hoping he hasn't worried Eduardo. He turns to the cab driver and gives him Beckett's address.
"In a rush?" the man asks from the front seat.
Castle pulls a twenty out of his pocket and hands it to the driver.
"Get me there fast," he tells him. He receives a nod and the cab takes off before he has time to buckle his seat belt.
He doesn't care though, because the faster they leave his building the faster he'll get to Kate. He thanks the universe he had the good sense to grab his phone on his way out of the apartment and he finally takes the time to write her back, though it's barely been five minutes since she's sent her text.
He aims for short and to the point.
On my way.
Not usually his style. He's usually one for more elaborate explanations, especially in the written form, but he doesn't want to assume anything. She might still be upset and want nothing more than his presence.
Or she might want more.
She might want to reaffirm their relationship, their exclusivity and her unwillingness to share. He wants her to. Wants her to claim him, to dig her claws in and proclaim him hers. He wants her to want him. Rick Castle has never wanted to be claimed or owned but with her he yearns for it, aches to feel her fingers mapping his skin, marking her territory. It's primal and he realizes he's going a little caveman but it's what she does to him.
He is hers. In every way, shape, or form, she has him. The deep sated need to have her know that he has never been anyone's as he has been hers makes itself known and his eagerness to get to her amplifies. His heart bubbles with it and he needs to prove it to her, prove that there is no one else, and that despite their relationship being somewhat new, he knows that there will never be anyone else. Certainly not in the way that he wants her. His phone buzzes and before looking he knows it's her. Her response is as concise and to the point as his was.
Good.
Oh, how he hopes she isn't still upset with him. He's content to give her whatever she'll be willing to receive but the blood he feels rushing south as the cab pulls up to her apartment wants him to believe otherwise. Castle thanks the driver, pays quickly and heads for her front doors. He enters, and decides to take the elevator up, buying himself some time to cool down and he attempts to reign in the need he feels seeping out of every pore.
He's not nearly as calm as he'd like when the doors of the elevator open on her floor but he can't bear to be away from her for another second. He takes a deep breath when he reaches her door and knocks three times.
Castle waits, and in the silence that fills the hall he thinks he can make out the sound of her feet heading towards the door. His heart rate picks up, in tandem with the pace of her steps towards him. He senses her stop when she reaches the door. In their month together he has found that their bodies are as in sync as their minds. It takes a couple of moments before she opens to him and he realizes she must have been checking the peep whole because the sight he is greeted with has his nerve endings firing. And he hasn't even touched her yet. She pulls him inside of her apartment quickly and he's glad because we wouldn't share this view with anyone in the world.
She's wearing nothing but a smile.
A/N: Thank you so much for reading. I would love to know what you all think!