AN | I've had this sitting around for a while, meaning to finish something, finally, for my beloved series. So now here's this compilation of sorts (set in R2). This is mostly self-indulgent but I'll also appreciate other readers who might like this. You can, hopefully, expect more works from me for this series; I have more in the works, it's just a matter of sprucing up and fleshing out.
#1. Secrets
Milly Ashford has strong, sometimes unstoppable, tendencies to impulsively orchestrate plans. That and being the academy's Student Council President allows her to set up a last-minute school festival slash dance, on a Monday evening. It throws plans to rendezvous with the minimal number of Black Knights nearby off charter but Lelouch tries not to panic; well, he, at least, then, assembles a facade to appear as calm and casual as usual. In his head he's plotting escape routes from this undesirable festivity, keeping away from the crowd of dancers and to himself far off and away against a shadowed corner of the school wall. He thinks Kallen, who excused herself from the second half of school prior, shouldn't be too far from his location.
"Hey there, Vice-prez!" Milly gives him the fright of his life, appearing all of a sudden right in his face, as loud and excitable as ever. Lelouch readjusts his heart to its correct pace, stammering a greeting back to her after. Milly chuckles like a plotting villain, a signature of hers for a young women regularly stirring up a storm of mischief for the sake of having a good time—not that anyone ever gets hurt too badly. "So, I saw you sneak off! What'cha doing over here all by yourself?"
"O-oh, well, I, you see," Lelouch plays one of his best cards and comes up with a logical answer of reasoning, one that can't be span for a lie by a not-so-bright mind. No offense, of course, to the Madam President. "I'm not all by myself. You're here now as well."
Milly's mind is bright enough, though, to know that's not exactly a clear answer. She warns him not to get too wise with her tonight with a specific smile of hers, for he won't be escaping so easily this time. "This is a party, Lelouch. A boy as smart as you ought to know what that involves. Stop being such a stick in the mud and get out there and have a good time! Move a little, why don't you?! Quit looking for an exit all the while!"
If she hadn't meant to sound so strict and commanding, she's failed. But Lelouch knows it's all good intentions on Milly's part, just as it was when she and her family insisted on lending his sister and he their services and a home to reside in.
He feels, if only a little, guilty.
"Sorry, Milly. I can't."
"What? Dance? Pfft, mmhaha—"
"No. I just...can't participate. But your efforts to involve me are generous and appreciated, Madam President."
Milly's brow heightens in suspicion, she steps closer for facial inspection, "Can't you? Or won't you?"
"Can't." Lelouch repeats, though in reality it's actually no difference to him. "I'm afraid I have plans to—wha-? H-hey!" he's caught and pulled by an arm before he can feed her his excuse, which Milly rightfully deduces his 'reason' will be from knowing him for so long, and it's embarrassing but he can't really fend her off; he's not physically blessed with muscles, but she's on a rampage anyway, so determined, quite difficult to tame.
Milly whisks him away from the school and toward the festival, going so they're able to hear the music clearer than before, going and going until she's put him in the flood of dancers that are now circling around Lelouch, drowning him and his protesting cries in their willing participation and flashy clothes from bright gowns to smooth suits, locking him in their carefree, good time. They're silk and fairy-tale like while he's white, woollen cardigan over his uniform is little competition—not that he was competing—and he stands out all the more than he already does literally just standing and looking over at Milly through the moving couples.
"Milly!" Lelouch cries out to her, helpless and betrayed.
Said woman laughs and shakes her head at his apprehension to what is clearly (to everyone else) a good time. "Oh, come on! Calm down, Lelouch. It's a wonder why you're so popular when you never put yourself out there." she wags a finger at him, "You'll make a lot of girls a lot happier, trust me. Especially a girl I know in particular."
"Who?"
"My God, you're utterly clueless!"
"That's not my fault!" Lelouch ducks to a side, narrowly missing an elbow to the side by an oncoming, twirling couple. "Ugh, get me out of here already!"
Milly hums whilst she's overseeing the crowd with a raised hand above her eyes, looking for a particular red-head among the sea of dresses she either wants or already owns, and men she thinks are either eye-catching or donning a passed year's trend of hairstyle. Yes, she's on top of her fashion, thank you very much. "Shame. I think she's dancing with some other guy. Oh, that Shirley, I told her to standby while I nab you for her!"
"What? I'm not a cat!"
"Lucky for you," says Milly with a wicked grin "Otherwise Suzaku'd have you."
"...I'd have him...for what?"
Lelouch can't find a time in his life when he's wanted to be saved as badly as he does now, including operations against the Holy Britannian Empire with the Black Knights, and the time Arthur the Cat ran around the school with his helmet. Suzaku has appeared to see what's going on—why, to be exact, the Vice-President looks to be in such distress in the center of the dance floor. Milly's even wickeder smile gives her main role in this away. But instead of coming to Lelouch's rescue like he somewhat planned on his way here, he now becomes a part of the mischief, Milly hatching a brand new idea all too quickly (to compensate for the failure of her first plan to get Shirley close with the Vice-President) and shoving him in to the circle with Lelouch before either of the boys can blink. They yell together at the sort of rough collision they experience, for which Suzaku apologizes at least twice.
Milly addresses the perplexed duo who are looking at her like a pair of kittens in a basket. "As I already said, this is a party. Don't make me pull out the "President says" card and make it an official requirement from the both of you. Suzaku, please see if you can keep our Vice-President busy while I grab Shirley?"
"You don't meant to suppose..." Suzaku starts to ask for a clarification, then he understands and his eyes widen in surprise. "But we're both, you know, guys!"
Lelouch's eyes have every justification to roll like they do. "Congratulations, Suzaku, you're going to pass Biology." He won't say he's a little taken aback, too, but there are much bigger, nastier, more important things going on in the world today. Uncommon sexuality is nowhere near the margin of war between statuses of power and battles over places of belonging for vast groups of weak individuals.
Milly giggles. "Yes, Suzaku, trust me, I know." and she doesn't care one little bit. "You two enjoy yourselves! Okay?" She winks and waves to them and hops off and away, fading from sight in the mingling of students spread around the campus. That young woman is kind of like a witch, appearing to do her bidding of bewitching her poor victims in to outrageous schemes, then disappearing.
Suzaku watches awhile longer at where the President once stood. Seeing right through her eccentricity, he can see her real goal is to get their mutual friend to have a good time for once. He switches focus and his body to the boy beside him. "Lelouch, let's just..." now he means to initiate that which was ridiculously suggested of them, but he tries not to think it to be...too weird. So they're both guys, but they're just as much friends. Suzaku breathes in, out, telling himself more than once that this isn't weird.
Lelouch watches every move like it's dangerous. The gentle way Suzaku's hand takes one of his told clasp, the confident way he pulls the other to a shoulder to lay, the careful way he curves an arm around his waist and comes in closer. If he didn't know this boy better, he'd bet he knew a thing or two about dancing, and about what limb goes where and how. Or maybe it's just common sense to everyone but Lelouch, the willing and frequent participators of social functions. A Prince in his previous life, of course he attended such events and span around a ballroom a couple times with young girls and elder relatives. Suzaku remembers; for a moment he freezes, surprised by his rather insensitive assumption that between them both he'd be the one to lead the dance.
If he's figured it out, too, and is offended, Lelouch swallows it, along with what pride remains, untouched by Milly's boldness. He appreciates it in a way because not being expected to lead means not automatically being stuck to his foregone royal status.
They begin steadily, simple footwork, anti-clockwise to the swirling couples surrounding them. Lelouch is surprised, for he expected it would be necessary to whisper sense of direction and movement patterns into his partner's ear, but Suzaku is capable of so much than he ever plans to let on: Piloting an advanced Knightmare Frame, attending a patriotic Britannian school despite the slurs and slanders he was without a doubt going to face, no matter how liked and welcome the Student Council tried to make him feel.
Lelouch looks up in to Suzaku's eyes.
...Murdering his own father.
Lelouch closes his eyes, leans his head on the shoulder of his dancer partner and wonders how long it'll be before this ends and reality comes back to split them and their ideals apart once more. The Black Knights are waiting for him—for Zero to brief them on their next operation, which is meant to be going on tonight! Obviously, he can't be in two places at once, and any half-assed excuse now will only bring about suspicion.
"Seven years..." Suzaku says, angling down a dreamy face and a smile. "Who ever thought we'd wind up together again?"
"...Yeah," Lelouch tries not to feel uncomfortable beneath the stare. "It's some coincidence."
"You don't strike me as the type to believe in things like that. Everything's usually logic and purpose with you."
"No. Exactly."
Suzaku smiles at the answer, feeling closer now to the enigma engulfing his childhood. "So, what you been up to recently?"
"You mean what "have" I been up to."
"Apart from correcting people's grammar, yeah."
"Oh, this and that. Dealing with...acquaintances. I'm sort of in charge of a big...reunion project, thing."
"Sounds taxing." says Suzaku. "And suspicious."
"It is. Taxing, I mean. They're always looking for more than I can give them right now. They're always looking to know my secrets."
The arm around his waist becomes securer, like it expects separation and wants to stop it. It seemed impossible before but Lelouch is pulled even closer, his chest against another. Otherwise, Suzaku is indifferent. "Tell them they all have to get in line." he says, a serious meaning behind the words but a friendly, playful smile on his face. It used to be kind of exciting to have this mysterious friend from another land. Now it's becoming tiring, irritating, offensive being kept away further than arms length. Suzaku's smile falters when he says, "...I'm starting to see you less and less these days, Lelouch."
Lelouch looks remarkably stunned. "That's not true!"
"Isn't it?"
Lelouch swallows thickly under the heavy spell of those brown eyes again. "N-No. No," he says again, ridding his voice of the uncharacteristic stutter. "You merely have to find my hiding spots." he ignorantly thinks a smile that's as broken as his relationship with his family will fix this.
"...Why would you hide from me?"
Lelouch almost doesn't answer; he thinks that he can't. It's hard to explain himself, to give answers, when he can't give out the entire story without putting himself in danger. Call it a wall, then, a defense mechanism.
They step and twirl to the music, mixing among the other partnered dancers who look cozy and comfortable rather than being given a parody of the third degree.
"I'm doing what I think is right, to protect everything important to me."
"By lying and keeping secrets? Seven years later, is that how you work?"
Lelouch shrugs, "'Ignorance is bliss', so they say."
"It's not! It really isn't! Lelouch, listen, you can talk to me! If there's anything—"
"Um...excuse me? Is it alright if I cut in?" asks Shirley, finally arriving, her voice putting a soft stop to the conversation before it evolves in to a shouting match. She looks to and fro between them, eyeing their closeness and how their limbs are on each other so comfortably like they're familiar enough to belong. It's silly to think this is beyond the President's dirty doing but still, she finds herself facing her feet below, feels her cheeks heating up, she's nervously tucking hair behind an ear between sneaky glances upward at the boys.
Lelouch subtly sighs with relief, having been saved by her sudden appearance. A moment longer, out of excuses and with no escape, he might not have been able to evade Suzaku's furious questioning anymore; dodging and lying are only so effective before they become repetitive, all the more so if the person you're dodging and/or lying to knows you and can see through some cracks. And it's not as if he could've used his ability on Suzaku again. But...would he even want to?
"It's not a problem." Lelouch answers, casual face on while he slips out of Suzaku's hold and offers him over to her. Shirley is as confused as Suzaku, they all know she'd asked to dance with Lelouch. Like the sneaky mind he is, though, he uses her lack of specification in his favour. "But be careful, Shirley. Suzaku's got two left feet."
"I do not—hey, wait! Lelouch!" Suzaku is about to defend himself and avoid embarrassment, but too quickly his supposedly best friend is taking off, without a word.
"Lulu, where are you going?" asks Shirley, disappointed that she won't get to dance with him.
Lelouch gives them nothing more or less of a wave in their direction, but silently, in his head, apologizes to them both. He knows as well as they do that they can easily catch him if they really want to—even Shirley in her high heels she's fished out for the evening. But she and Suzaku will mutually wonder why they should even bother, because getting straight answers out of Lelouch Lamperouge is about as challenging as winning a prize from a Claw Machine.
In the distance, Lelouch spots Kallen. She's wearing her designated Black Knights Uniform, and from the look she's giving him across the courtyard, she's not happy neither about having to wait for him to meet up with her. She won't mention a word to having seen him and Suzaku share a dance and seem so close (even if she does, how can she be sure she'll get an honest answer?) Behind in the scene he's leaving, Lelouch hears Shirley apologize to Suzaku, in case her preference in dance partners has offended him. Suzaku says he's fine, that he isn't as bad a dancer as Lelouch claimed him to be.
And from the way he was so invested in digging for truths, he apparently isn't as ignorant nor naive.
#2. Hiding
Ms. Villetta Nu is on another one of her rampages down many hallways, turning each corner and her head from left to right, shouting out the name of the infamous and elusive student who is too comfortable with missing P.E. classes. To anyone outside the academy, this will seem like an over-the-top spectacle, but the students have witnessed this many times, so it has become a frequency on any given day, week, which they remain indifferent to. But not her, because she's familiar with having to catch the misbehavers. She's even quite good at it. Doesn't properly know why, though—(that's a haze in her mind she can't clear through compilations of flashbacks dating to a time she can't remember). It mustn't matter a whole lot, then, she decides, focusing back on her task at hand. Cutting classes to dangerously dabble in underground chess games, where high stakes are placed by nobles who are none the wiser, has much more to gain than a "compulsory knock-off that does little more than waste valuable time, and brain power".
"Don't tell me you're chasing after him again, Ms. Villetta."
At the student's she was about to pass by's words, she's stops. Looking around, she finds she's wound up in a isolated-like area, where the walls and floors and all pristine with reflections, where there's a nice bouquet of flowers supported by a vase sitting atop of a floored cabinet, the large window pane behind the student welcomes in sunshine and the view of the large water fountain in the courtyard below. Calm. Quiet, unbelievably so.
Ms. Villetta gives the student a mixed expression of annoyance with suspicion as she speaks to him, "Suzaku Kururugi. I have a feeling you know where he is, where he's hiding."
"You mean Lelouch?"
"Who else? That boy skips out on as many of my classes as he can. Whereas you're in top physical form. Can't you beat sense in to him?"
Suzaku smiles, "If I say yes, does that mean I know where he is?"
Ms. Villetta is sure he does anyway but that he just won't spill it. "You're his classmate. Plus, I've seen the two of you being quite chatty lately."
Suzaku shrugs. "Sorry, ma'am. But if I see him before you do I'll make make sure to tell him that skipping any of his classes won't help him later when he applies for colleges and jobs."
Just as she thought, Villetta thinks, he's not providing the answer she wants. It's good Suzaku's offered to scold Lelouch himself but Ms. Villetta will much prefer doing it herself; that way there's no uncertainty that the words will hit him hard, then she can deliver a punishment of make-up classes. She goes on ahead, storming the corner, continuing her search.
Suzaku stays where he is and stares at her location of disappearance. For a short time, he remains like this, cautious she might return. All the while he's drawing back a hand to the floored cabinet he purposely stood in front of, raps against it once, twice and again after. The door slides across smoothly and Lelouch emerges, head first, slightly breathless and hotter from the lack of air inside the small space. Though he's relieved all the same, he can't believe his last-minute decision—(because 'plans' involve time for proper thought process)—to stuff himself in to a compact cabinet worked.
"Thanks, Suzaku." he says when he can generate air properly through his lungs.
"No problem." the bottom of his pants leg is tugged at, a silent request for him to come inside the cabinet. He doesn't suppose he has much choice, for the alternative is to stand by, idle and out-of-place. "You know I am actually right," he says, clambering inside, the door sliding back across after. "All of your classes matter, Lelouch, despite what you think. Skipping even just one of them won't look good when you want to apply for decent colleges and jobs."
"There you go again, worrying about someone other than yourself."
"I'm fine. Can't I worry about you?"
"Thanks but I have enough intelligence to get by. And I am a Britannian Prince."
"Renounced Prince."
"I have blood ties to the royal family."
"They think you and Nunnally are dead."
Lelouch sighs. "Anything to get them through the night, I guess."
Suzaku can't really speak much about family and how they should be (save for ideas he has from the fairy-tales he heard of and read to Nunnally many years ago). He isn't qualified to comfort the friend whose father was fine with kicking two children out and sending them to another country in the midst of a war. Suzaku redirects the focus of conversation instead to a nicer memory, while marveling what he can of the small space they're in. "Man, being in here reminds me of the time you, Nunnally and I used to play hide and seek. It was fun, trying to fit our small bodies in to even smaller places."
"And now?"
Suzaku laughs, admitting, "I feel like we're on the run, like you're a criminal and I'm your accomplice."
"If I go down then, sorry but, I'll have to bring you down along with me, old friend."
"Well someone's got to save your ass. It's always in trouble."
"Can we not talk about my ass like it's the weather?"
"Fine." Suzaku shrugs. "...But they'd catch you first. Long before they catch me, though. 'Cause you're so out of shape you can't even out-run Milly in heels—"
"Hey, don't bring that up neither!"
"Sir, yes, Sir."
"Oh, shut up." Lelouch shakes his head at the immature shenanigans, he groans and leans his head back against the cabinet. "Be it the teachers, you, anyone...if it's a matter of making sure I'm not caught then I'll hide. I'll use all the tricks I have up my sleeves to leave everyone completely lost in the dark." It's funny that he says this, because Suzaku swears it's exactly what he's been doing all this time...without ever letting up for a moment.
Not even in the sanctuary of their friendship.
#3. Misdirection
Aside from his opponent being unable to pose any real challenge—though, it's supposed that even the nobles who play underground do—there are three major reasons why Lelouch doesn't much care to play chess with Suzaku.
Reason number one: Suzaku becomes sloppy. He tends to forget where he means to move his pieces next, and the intentions behind it. He often mixes pieces up, so he degrades their prominent title instead by passing unfitting nicknames round. (Once, Lelouch confiscated the King piece when it moved three spaces too many on the board. Suzaku was incredulous and fought back, recycling a familiar quote: "But Lelouch, the King has to lead or else his people won't follow, right?" and the look Lelouch gave him for that was so chilling).
Reason number two: Suzaku likes to be chatty. Really chatty. As if a cog in the workings of his mind sticks and his focus on the game redirects to birds that fly close to the window (trivial things) or worse, anecdotes from past times they can't go back to. (Suzaku will start with something along the lines of "Hey, remember back when we were kids and we tried—" and Lelouch will shut him down before he wastes a move, before his heartstrings are pulled by a strong feeling of loss). When Suzaku does this he's cruel but he doesn't even know.
It's hard to think of a future without considering what you're moving on from.
And the third reason (which isn't like the others so it shouldn't be accounted for): Chess isn't a game for adorableness but Suzaku effortlessly makes it so, the way he lights up miraculously when he thinks he's doing alright, then deflates like a small puppy when he's proven otherwise and yet another piece is stripped from his side of the board. Playing Chess with Suzaku Kururugi, Lelouch thinks, can't be much different than playing with a child.
A fourth reason exists but it's more or less mute: the conclusion of their match on a general basis, with not much room for the possibility of change unless the loser takes up lessons—learns "the pointy thing" is named Bishop, the "castle leg" named Rook.
"Guess you win. No surprise there. You're too good, I didn't stand a chance." Suzaku always says this at the end of their match. His friend is highly skilled, it's true, but so is the fact he's never once claimed victory over his older brother.
"My being "too good" doesn't necessarily ensure your constant defeat."
"Sure it does."
An irritated sigh comes with the question asked too many times, "Then why do you insist on playing against me? You rushed through the rules and mechanics in under five minutes, that's not enough time for a beginner."
Suzaku snorts, "I'm not sure I can say I'm even that."
"No, I was being considerate."
"Game's over, Lelouch. Quit the smack talk."
"Yes. I'd say you did enough talking for the both of us. And the rest of the world."
"Don't make me come over there."
"You haven't answered my question: if you always expect to lose, why do you keep playing against me?"
"It seems..." Suzaku shrugs. "Fun."
"Fun?" Lelouch rarely hears that adjective partner up with an intricate game like Chess. His opponent is talking in a way that's making him sound more clueless than ever. "But, Suzaku, you lost..." his king fell and thus his followers—the other chess pieces—did surrender. For it to be taken so calmly like this, Lelouch wonders if it's still fun for Suzaku to lose everything. To blindly lead people to their demise and be left powerless, hopeless, the decided loser.
"It's just a game." Suzaku says as he's rising up from his seat to leave—(he'd mentioned, beforehand, that at an appointed time he'd be needed back at the Military for, what sounded like, extensive training with the Lancelot).
Lelouch watches his King piece on the board, black, tall and victorious. He's thought Chess to be like a reflection of life, that there are many pawns in the palm of reality's cruel hand, and that there is only one superior power.
#4. Savior
A full two minutes or so pass, then Suzaku realizes he's running alone, that his partner has been lost in the oncoming crowd of jogging students and defeated by his own lacking stamina and physique. He retraces, rounding the gated outdoor basketball court, there's Lelouch lying on the floor, sweaty and wheezing and breathless and flushed—completely washed up by the morning's PhysEd class. Not that Suzaku wouldn't have minded being partnered with him, it came down to that decision when no one else wanted to (understandable since the Vice-President is athletically challenged to an unbelievable margin).
"Err, Lelouch? Are...you alright?"
"Just, hah, hah...p-peachy, hah..."
"That's funny 'cause you look pretty run down."
"Well, hah, let me ask you something..." Lelouch struggles to push himself up from the ground, then shakily lean on his elbows embedded on concrete. "What kind of partner is prone to exercise abandonment, huh?" he's asks in a quick breath. Afterward, he's just as breathless as ever and can't even make it through some more of the third degree. He waves it off with 'hah, hah, f-forget it!'
Suzaku squats down beside him. "Need some water? An inhaler?"
"Oh—hah, hah—s-shut up."
Suzaku audaciously grins. "Want me to carry you?"
"I'm neither amused nor a damsel, thank you."
"Ah, but you're in distress." Suzaku enjoys the bit of silence that substitutes a verbal answer, it's like a 'Fuck you' from a defeated rival and it's not often he's right and Lelouch isn't. His offer is genuine, however, though refused by the concern of being seen by their peers and all sorts being suggested, compromising a particular Japanese transfer student. Suzaku nearly rolls his eyes, so sick of having to think about this stuff. "At this point, I really don't give a fuck."
Lelouch frowns as if he's looking at something that that's meant to make sense but fails to. "Don't swear," he says. "It doesn't suit you." And it's true; hearing the ever-so polite, hero of justice his childhood friend has grown up to be use such degrading language—(no matter how hot a ring it may have to it)—licks bittersweet vibrations against the ear drums.
"Right. Sorry." Suzaku supposed it wouldn't have suited him, too, but tried for the sake of coming across reliable, dead serious—which he is a lot of the time but Lelouch chooses not to recognize. "But I mean it. I didn't care what they thought of me when I first came here—and believe me, I'm sure whatever you think they'd call me now won't trump 'murderer'."
"...Suzaku, I didn't mean to—"
"You're having a hard time, Lelouch. So let me help."
Lelouch stares at his friend awhile, judging for himself if there are any agendas behind the strong face of friendliness. Apparently not. Or Suzaku's so dead set on this he won't allow any room for refusal anymore. So they agree to the assist, Lelouch swings his arms around Suzaku's neck and clambers on to his back (where bodacious muscles lie), then Suzaku secures the position with his arms supporting the light weight of Lelouch's slim thighs. It's embarrassing but Lelouch can't see himself finishing the lap around the field, nor can he imagine, in his current shape, he'll be able to see himself to the school nurse in the infirmary wing before sunset.
"Thanks, Suzaku. I owe you one."
"Hey, don't worry, it's fine. How are you feeling now? Is this uncomfortable?"
Lelouch shakes his head, wordless while he tries to figure out whether he's merely tolerating or enjoying this. His vision of the back of Suzaku's head while he jogs the rest of the lap. His thighs sitting in the palm of Suzaku's strong but gentle hands. And then...his face against the curves and toning of Suzaku's back, leaning on his savior with closed eyes, savoring this piece in time.
"Not at all."
#5. Fascination
Free time is a rarity for Suzaku these days as much of it is borrowed by Military duties, but with that not being the case this time, and school work caught up with and none left to spare, he decides to recline along on a couch in the Student Council club-room with a decent book in his hands.
The fictional land set for the duo-protagonists of separate, colliding statuses feels a little close to home in some way, which might be why its drawn him in, plot aside, himself being an honorary Britannia while his best friend and his sister-the sweet, gentle, optimistic Princess he once served, bless Euphy—being royalty. The first protagonist in the book, Edward, a prince, plans to journey to a far side of the country, looking for a spell to raise his father, the King's, health up and /simultaneously/ stop the kingdom from falling in to the hands of a dictator, with no decent goals for its people, in his place. Accompanying him, described to usually be wearing a thick, dark, hooded cloak masking all but his face and fluffy fringe, is the friend from time ago, Wallace, who Suzaku suspects to be guilty of harboring an additional, selfish agenda. Mysterious, quiet save for condescending, blunt words, hailing from a foreign, neighboring land…he checks for the ways a character can miraculously descend from appearing loyal and safe to being blindly erroneous.
Suzaku's brows furrow, frustrated by trying hard to figure the character out (only five chapters in, too, with more than twenty remaining). He's not accustomed to reading works that aren't non-fictional so this whole novel can take him from now up to near Christmas.
Longer, perhaps, he substitutes when Lelouch comes walking by and so effortlessly takes the book right out of his hands.
Suzaku sits up, gasps and calls out, "Rude much!"
"Says someone who barges in to people's rooms without permission."
"For the last time, I knocked!" Suzaku watches Lelouch circle to the foot end of the couch and perch himself on the arm, watches him comfortably cross one leg over the other, frowns at the way he flicks through the book with gentle touches yet impatient page turns. "Hey, what gives? I'm reading that!"
"Which is precisely why I'm so intrigued, because it's not everyday the mind of Suzaku Kururugi is occupied with literature." Lelouch affirms, not even subtly insinuating that his friend possesses a simple mind. Well, if asked, he'll say it can't compare to his own.
"It's not but I found this one and so far it's—" Suzaku reaches out for the book, Lelouch swats his hand away like a troublesome fly. Suzaku frowns at that, then at the way the pages are being turned, fearing they'll crease or the words will smudge from the lingering of a finger. What's the point of robbing him of his first, decent read anyway? Not to mention free time like this doesn't come often enough. "Come on! Don't, Lelouch!"
"Calm down," Lelouch coaxes while swatting again at the pesky hands. If he really wanted to then he could definitely take the book back, with his strengths and knowledge in combat, but he stays on the couch, donning a silly puppy's face. "I'm only looking….huh?"
"W-What? What is it?"
Lelouch puts on an expression quite foreign in his collection of faces—as limited as they are. The look you give something that's different to something else, something that lacks or has misplaced sense that Lelouch is tilting his head at and holding the book out to a random open page. This worries Suzaku, he wonders if maybe a crucial plot point was caught in the quick skim through. He doesn't want spoilers, not for his first, decent read!
"Lelouch! What?!" Suzaku exclaims. He's sure that Lelouch partially lives to torture him with long silences—and sometimes anecdotes that cripple his pride (in an act of revenge, supposedly).
Lelouch squints at the book, then his eyes widen, astound. "There aren't any pictures." he says, laughing after at the deserved kick to his lower waist and cry of "Jerk!".
#6. Naivety
"Cecile and Lloyd say my studies are just as important as piloting a Knightmare." Suzaku says as he's fetching books from inside his school satchel. He adds, smiling, "But I'm pretty sure I'd rather fight with the Lancelot than negotiate with equations that don't make a lot of sense to me."
Lelouch hums just to prove he's listening, while his eyes and real attention are on one of the latest articles on Zero he's pulled up on the internet: "Hero of Justice or Masked Menace?" is the bold title, darkly double-sided in meaning; utterly tasteless in Lelouch's opinion. He never imagined his alias would be given an idol-like spot-light. Publicity is good but it does have its esteem-wrecking sides as well.
"Yes, well," Lelouch says, realising he hasn't answered. "You can't expect to pilot that thing and be in the military business forever. Your superiors are right, education is important and we are supposed to be mankind's bright future."
"Yeah, I guess. Like they say in those songs."
"What songs?" 'Good grief', Lelouch despairs, hoping the friend isn't going to burst in to song and dance to make a point while he's beginning a well opinionated review on the article under a false name. Now, he wasn't going to sink so low and waste a syllable on such a tedious, backless argument with little direction of sense that integrated eccentric hobbies in to the mix, but a part of him wonders what his perspective will possibly start among the masses interested in Zero's next move.
HolySword41 says: This "Zero" guy is as much of a loser as his name sounds. Who does he even think he is? Pulling stunts that injure a lot of innocent people and killing Prince Clovis as well as Princess Euphemia! Like, what the hell?! He's just some desperate, cosplay wannabe seeking attention and demanding power and respect through despicable means!
4hrs ago… 26 Likes … 1 reply
Black King says: "—Demanding power and respect through despicable means!" Now why do I find that to be such a distinctive representation of this country? Hm, it's ironic. You suspect Zero to be little less than a thoughtless murderer, but I believe murders done with unjustifiable notions are a greater crime. The Holy Britannina Empire isn't guiltless neither. Now, on the subject of Zero's identity, rather than being male or female, in the grander design, I'd say there's a means to stand on top of Britannina, in ruins and pathetic shambles, as a symbol of hope to the people of Japan and to those who do not have power. Maybe that's how Zero is self perceived.
10secs ago… 4 Likes … 0 replies.
"Those ones, you know, on the radio. Of our youth."
Lelouch's eyes flick from the computer screen to Suzaku in skepticism. He hardly catches music on the radio that isn't classical or sometimes soft rock, so whatever modern pop song is being spoken of is going right over his head. "What on earth are you talking about? Suzaku, study even half as much as you listen to the "songs of our youth" and you probably won't be doing as bad as you are."
"I'm not, actually."
"Yes, you are, actually. Why else would you ask me to tutor you?"
"I don't have a problem with asking someone else, but they'd..." Reject him. Discriminate against him. Loathe him almost like how he loathes himself sometimes. Suzaku's fist squeezes in on itself, then relaxes. His lips are inches short of a proper smile, but still, he keeps up the act of being satisfied with his life as it currently is. "It's just…" He rises from his seat, walking around the table. Lelouch closes down the lid of his laptop and luckily Suzaku isn't suspicious of the speed in which he does. "I trust you won't mock the parts of me I can't change like you do with things I can but just choose not to."
Lelouch looks up at him, casual but guarded. "Such as?"
"Charging in to things head first. Putting others before myself."
"You do. Suzaku, you're kind, but you're also careless and naive."
Suzaku smiles, grateful. "See?"
#7. Normality
Milly too eagerly assembled the Student Council members—practically locked them inside and shoved the key down in to her bodacious chest—all for the sake of playing an infamous and dangerous game. She's gone and done this for entertainment and hilarious anecdotes to reminiscence over in the future, no one is exempt from seeing the truth. Even if there's also the fact that she wants to bring her friends relationships with each other closer, even so, there's no doubt this'll cause trouble.
Excluding Kallen as she's absent, there are five members of the Student Council on the floor in a close-knit circle(—"five too little", Lelouch remarks, for such a game they're about to play, but "five just right" the President nonsensically corrects him and the game goes on, to his disappointment). The only real participants aside from Milly are Rivalz—in favour of trying his luck and ending up involved with the President, and Shirley—secretly in favour of trying her luck out with the Vice-President. Suzaku in the circle to be polite, thinking a quick refusal to join in is a hint to an anti-social trait instead of it just meaning he has /sense/. Lelouch is in the circle only because everyone knows he won't escape quick enough before he's caught, and so all he has to keep calm is his phone.
The game's a mess from the start, debates over rules, preferences, the speed of which the bottle in the center should be spun all meddling into a loud orchestra. Suzaku adds tidbits where he thinks he may be of some help while Lelouch tries to keep quiet and to himself with his Chess game (the real anti-social). Whenever the bottle does happen to stop and point to him, his answer is always automatic and always /yes/ (otherwise Milly will be cruel rather than kind with the dare and likely try to embarrass him). As expected but no less surprised, he's asked saucy topics of high impropriety, which he bypasses with threats to stop playing if they don't change the question to a trivial nature. Suzaku thinks of how irregular it is to hear the childhood friend who lies and holds many secrets repeatedly ask for the chance to tell the truth.
They're alright just letting the time pass like this…until the bottle lands on Suzaku, is spun again then lands on the unsuspecting Lelouch, who doesn't realise until it's too quiet and everyone's eyes are on him.
"M-Maybe we should spin it again." Suzaku says.
"I agree, perhaps we should…" Lelouch flashes a smile to everyone while he reaches for the bottle.
Milly moves fast and grabs it first. It's obvious how much she's been wanting this kind of set up to arrive, it's a wonder she didn't just throw the pair in to the closet herself half an hour ago when the game began. "Sorry but you know the first rule: no re-dos! Now into the closet now, boys," she claps excitedly and laughs at the irony of telling them to get in to what people are usually told to leave. "Seven minutes. Get to it. We'll be countin'!"
"Um…" Suzaku murmurs, stuck for a way out and much too nice to reject this altogether so directly. Milly wants them all to have fun, he can hardly refuse her that right nor say he's familiar with having friends and the mishaps they may bring for them to laugh over later. So, standing up from the circle (and panicking Lelouch) a willing part of him reckons—hopes—going along with this will turn out to be for the best. Seeing him submit, the word "traitor" comes to the Vice-President's mind.
Milly confiscates Lelouch's phone in a swipe. "No distractions from each other. Rule two!"
"Madam President, I don't appreciate this forceful side of you. Can you give it back?"
Rivalz cheekily wonders, "Who're you texting anyway? All your friends are in here, Lelouch."
"Very funny. I wasn't texting, I was—"
"Playing games and avoiding responsibilities, as usual." Milly says, then sighs. "I'm not your mother, Lelouch, and I'm not Nunally neither. But sheesh, it won't kill you to interact with us more. We haven't got much time left at this place—some of us less than others. Pretty soon, before you know it," she takes her eyes on a journey around the student council room, brief but meaningful, amazed. "—all this will be but a distant, sweet memory."
She's right. Lelouch can't deny her that. He isn't that cruel. She's done so much for him and Nunanlly over the years, understanding their circumstances and pushing for their stay at Ashford even though he was a total ass toward her. Wordlessly agreeing to her demand, he longingly eyes his phone, a low spirited sigh passing between his lips. "There goes my winning streak..."
"Don't worry, I'm sure Suzaku will cheer you up." Milly bets with a wink. "Now...into the closet!"
They go in to the closet. Big but not spacious enough for two to feel they have enough oxygen. So "roomy" is the word a person can use.
Suzaku thinks he can better the situation with small talk. "What did you think of this morning's surprise quiz? It had me stuck a couple times on some sections. They totally just sprung it out on us, right?"
"It wouldn't be a surprise quiz if we knew about it in advance, Suzaku."
"Obviously. I mean some of the questions didn't seem like they were were covered in any of the previous classes—"
"That's what happens when you skip too many classes to be at the military's beck and call."
"I guess…?" Suzaku briefly gives a suspicious look. Whatever that means, he thinks, because Lelouch has been caught missing classes, too. "You tutored me, though, so I thought I'd caught up."
"That would take a miracle."
Suzaku grins, "Which is just another word for 'hard work', am I right?"
Milly bangs hard on the closet, hardly placing second-lasting intervals between. "Ahem! Rule three: no conversing of academics!"
Suzaku looks abashed and protests, "I don't remember that rule!"
"I've just instigated it, Sir Kururugi! And no politics neither, Lelouch!"
Lelouch groans and knocks his head against the back wall. He can feel his life draining with every second that goes by in this small space. The President's rules are surely going to kill him. He's in a closet, for goodness sake! He bangs his head back again and grunts, despised by his feeling of helplessness.
Suzaku suddenly panics, "Lelouch, don't make those kind of sounds!"
"I'm allowed to express my intolerance to this ridiculous set-up, thank you."
Suzaku's eyes roll at the cold attitude. Classic Lelouch, barking and biting before anyone can get a word in. "No, I'm just saying they can't see us, so…they could think we're up to something in here. It doesn't take much to imagine…"
"Don't worry, it can't be more scandalous than the time Milly flashed another student."
"She did WHAT?!"
"It was a dare. She was drunk." Lelouch says. "One's a lie." Suzaku's about to yell his name again when Milly moans that she doesn't hear anything interesting and juicy going on in there. "It hasn't even been a full a minute yet." Lelouch says, checking Suzaku's watch. says.
"Really?" Suzaku's asks, eyes wide with disbelief. "It feels longer to me."
"...Look, old friend, don't take offense to this but I've noticed that in your company time likes to come to a halt."
"How am I not gonna take offense to that?! You're basically saying I'm boring!"
#8. Suspicion
"Knight-07" has logged in to the chat-room.
"King" has logged in to the chat-room.
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: Thanks for coming in. "King?" Really?
King is typing...
King: It's the most valuable chess piece. So what's this about? Couldn't you have talked to me earlier at dinner? Nunnally wouldn't have minded us excusing ourselves for a moment.
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: Look, are you Zero? I know it's like an ambush out of nowhere but be honest.
King is typing...
King: It's awfully direct of you, yes. But let me ask you: who is Zero? The mask he wears? A miracle worker? Or is he simply just a terrorist?
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: Thanks for not even trying to deny it.
King: There's little to no meaning in trying to influence the already convinced. By inviting me to this secluded space (that I hardly use because I find it tedious and a means to make face to face communication redundant) I think you came to a conclusion. Perhaps you were giving me an honest chance, but you're pretty sure of your answer, aren't you?
Knight-07: It's not like I can forget what I know and walk away. You can't use your Geass on me twice..
King is typing...
King: "Ignorance is bliss".
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: But I can't be ignorant to this anymore. If you're Zero then I'll have to bring you in. I've told you from before that I want to change the world from the inside.
King is typing...
King: Even if you sell out your friends along the way?!
Lelouch sourly thinks of the time he was snatched and taken and betrayed and tortured in front of his father, the Emperor, his memories stripped and wiped and lost in a opaqueness, unfamiliarity. His sister, sweet Nunnally, his doings as Zero.
Knight-07: Yes, if it comes to it. Because of you, I've had to become as harsh as the world has been to both of us.
King is typing...
King: Funny. I don't remember using my Geass on you for that.
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: Do you remember using it on your sister and ordering her to kill all those people?
Lelouch re-thinks explaining himself fully, about how it was an accident, because that won't change a thing. Euphemia will still be dead beneath the ground and her Knight, her love interest had they more time, his oldest friend will still be furious with him. Instead, he settles with typing about his doubt in her plans for the Special Administrative Zone of Japan, saying that it wouldn't have worked.
Knight-07: There is so much I wanna say to you right now, but apparently swearing doesn't suit me.
King: Oh, don't be so dramatic.
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: I just want to know, aside from everything else,
Everything else? He means the deaths of countless people, close friends and family included? Lelouch opens his eyes a little more, sits up straight (postpones preparing to make coffee just to keep himself awake long enough to get a reply back).
Knight-07: Why?
Lelouch blinks then his brows crease to squint.
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: I didn't want it to be you.
As Zero.
Lelouch sits back away from the screen and thinks it over. It hits him deeply. Suzaku might probably never truly understand why. But that's another question, isn't it? The right question. Why does it have to be anyone? Why does the world need to be in such disarray for someone to want to become Zero?
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: I can't let you do whatever you want! And if I let you walk away I might as well be your accomplice. Everything you've done has been sneaky, deceitful and cowardly!
King is typing...
King: "To defeat a monster, one must sacrifice their humanity."
Knight-07: Stop quoting philosophical bullshit and take responsibility. You've murdered people, you bastard.
Lelouch doesn't point out the swear words. It's likely intentional, Suzaku's not so naive anymore. Lelouch also keeps to himself the hot image of Suzaku so furious he becomes fiery and willing to throw himself away to be dirty.
King is typing...
King: I've told many false truths in my life, it's true. I know things are a mess and that I'm at fault! I've become the sole blame now my father's disappeared, too. But I'm working to end it all. So, old friend, if you'll show me some more of your kindness, and your pity, please join me.
He's asking a lot. So much. Too much.
A reply doesn't come.
1 minute passes.
Two, four minutes...
Lelouch fears he's lost Suzaku forever now. He thought uncensored expression would pave the way for the right path he's been wanting to fall on to for some time now. This game of his versus Britannia has gone mad and out of control. There'll be no winners, only losers. So, at the very least, as owner of the power of a king, he should put an end to it once and for all.
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: I won't join you, Zero.
Lelouch feels mild pain angle in to his chest. It can't be helped. From the very beginning after saving his life, Suzaku rejected an alliance with the one named Zero, masked and mysterious and conniving and lawless. He types along the keyboard, responding with sarcastic praise toward the betrayal of their camaraderie. Suzaku's too good-natured, even with his own scars, to want anything more to do with the likes of a killer, a terrorist, a destroyer of lives. Lelouch handles the mouse, set to touch the 'x' in the corner of the window to log out, then go on trying his best to prepare for whatever will approach him next in the form of an old...acquaintance.
Of all he can lose in this game of war and justice he started against his own country, excluding his little sister, he'd rather it not be his oldest companion, his most revered ally...his—
Knight-07: However...
The small ding of the notification comes sudden enough it's overlooked until Lelouch understands it means there's a reply now. He sees that apparently, even though it seemed all that can be said was, there's still some voice left in Suzaku—(hopefully sparring derogatory of colorful shades).
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: I'm not above helping you end this once and for all, to put a stop to the masked menace.
Lelouch is surprised there's a chuckle that comes out from him. "Masked Menace" is quite derogatory in a silly way for the symbolic name with achieved feats.
King is typing...
King: Oh? Haven't you heard the masses? To the people of Japan, Zero is symbolic of hope, inspiration, equality, strength where there is weakness!
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: You're probably going to ask me if this is rhetorical but you never shut up, do you?
Well. Lelough sighs, actually relieved with the situation than he was before, and if anything he can see humor in their conversation now and a chance to be witty and critical, to drive Suzaku up the wall more and more but simply as Lelouch, the friend he's known for practically a life time.
King is typing...
King: Why, Suzaku Kururugi, are you psychic? How rude of you to keep your clairvoyance a secret from me, too.
Knight-07: Called it. And you're no better, you keep all of your secrets to yourself!
King: You should hurry and cut in line then, like you've been eager to.
Knight-07: OR you can give me a free pass right now.
King: Alright. What is it you want to know?
Knight-07: When haven't you lied to me?
King: Be specific.
Knight-07: Basically, have you lied to me in this entire conversation?
King: I wouldn't call an exchange of text between screens in a secluded, computer-run room a "conversation".
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: Lelouch.
King is typing...
King: Good grief. No.
Knigt-07: Are you lying to me now?
King: Suzaku, you're exhausting.
Knight-07: You gave me a free pass.
King: Yes but only for one use and you've asked three questions too many. I revoke your rights to use the pass any further.
Knight-07: *falls to knees and screams NOOO to the sky*
King: It's no longer a question why you weren't given that role in the school play. You're awful at acting.
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: Guess I'll leave all the charades up to you, huh.
A dig in the wrong but justified and fair direction. Lelouch stares at the response for some time before he replies.
King is typing...
King: I agree. After all, you have trouble remembering your class schedule these days. Tut tut.
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: Hey, Lay off! I also have advanced, strenuous Knightmare Pilot training on my plate. You skip classes like you're playing Hopscotch! WHICH, BY THE WAY, is comically ironic since you probably can't even jump a couple numbered squares drawn by CHILDREN before you pass out! And they can probably do it in skirts and heels! See? I'm not as dumb as you think, I KNOW HOW IRONY WORKS, YOU ROYAL JACKASS!
King is typing...
King: Well fuck off and go do your "advanced, strenuous" training!
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: Holy shit, you actually cursed. Must be raining cats and dogs outside.
King: The irony is unattractively strong in you. And I believe you meant "pigs must be flying". The phrase "raining cats and dogs" is commonly used for the weather.
Knight-07: Potato, tomato. You understood me! Geez, you and your fancy-ass way of talking, ever since you were a kid!
King is typing...
King: It's "potato, potato.", meant to emphasize the difference in a duo-correct way of pronunciation.
Knight-07: OMG SHUT UP!
Lelouch laughs and shakes his head at how silly this conversation has become, at how ridiculously Suzaku's reactions are but entertaining all the same and fun to escalate because he becomes desperate and falls to slang and cursing and whiny demands. Suzaku gets so embarrassed when his level of intelligence is compared to Lelouch's. Lelouch doesn't mean to offend him as much as he does; it's playful—often shameless—banter, which is nice right now. There's no war or ill-felt feelings there anymore—at least, they're at bay. They're at a kind of agreement now to finish things off once and for all.
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: I mean SERIOUSLY, you talk A LOT. It's, like, NON-STOP. You always have to correct people on their mistakes and have the last say but it's SO ANNOYING and it makes me wanna say SO MANY SWEAR WORDS IN A FUCKING ROW! Why don't you stop and take a breather now, okay?!
King is typing...
King: Okay, your point is noted. But it's incorrect to suggest I take a 'breather' when I'm not talking at all. We're communicating with keyboards via computers in this secluded space where neither you nor I are actually present.
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: OH. MY. GOD.
Knight-07 is typing...
Knight-07: I swear, you're just in love with yourself!
King is typing...
Knight-07 is typing...
King is still typing...
"Knight-07" has logged out of the chat-room.
"Well, he could've at least had the decency to say bye before leaving. How rude." Lelouch comments. Good manners cost nothing. Their online chatting is over but there are plans to meet Suzaku again in the works, to go over some things. Though nothing is concrete there are inklings and they've driven Lelouch to give the whole operation the title "Zero Requiem".
Lelouch eyes the screen, seeing even more irony from Suzaku's last response, and thinking that funnily enough he would've sworn, once, Suzaku was in love with him too.
#9. RE; visit
"Emperor Lelouch vi Brittannia. It has a ring to it, wouldn't you say?"
"It's awful."
"Then what do you think of "Zero"?"
"It's worse."
Lelouch laughs and throws his hands up in a helpless manor. "Oh well, I suppose I'm not suited to any name now. Vi Britannia, Lamperouge, Zero. I may as well have no name at all and be done with it. There are too many restricting ties to them anyway. Right, Masked Menace Zero?"
Suzaku shudders with the name that will soon be branded on to him. "What about what I want? You've taken so much from me and now you want me to do this for you. Guess nothing's changed, Lelouch, you're still selfish to the very end."
"I don't expect you to submit quietly like the others. Never have since you rejected me the first time I, as Zero, reached out to you."
"That's right, I've already had the honor of you using your Geass on me."
"Because if I hadn't, you'd still be here today, right?" Lelouch doesn't buy that for a second from the man who constantly endangered his life when in the Military. He scoffs. " I can take you to be many things, Suzaku, but not a coward."
"I can hardly keep a straight face, hearing that from you."
" 'Irony makes for good comedy.' And at the very least, we owe it to people we've involved to play our parts in this comedy to the very end, as horrible as it may be."
Suzaku frowns. "...Why?"
"Because you agreed. Because this is the Zero Requiem." That's the kind of obvious answer that should sum everything up… but it doesn't. It doesn't satisfy Suzaku's heart at all.
"The book I was reading in the club-room. Do you remember it?"
"The one about two men travelling to a far end of their country to save it's dying King before his position falls in to the hands of a heartless dictator."
"Yeah." Suzaku confirms. "In the end, it was revealed that the first protagonist, Edward, was not in fact the king's son or of royal blood at all, but it was the other protagonist, Wallace, the wanderer in the dark cloak, who was sent away to a neighboring land at a young age to keep him from a sickness that was spreading at the time. It was a secret known only to them, the King, and Edward's father—the dictator. They mutually hatched a plan a long time ago to poison the king—by his wishes—so they had a reason to go looking for the spell they wanted all along, but for themselves. The spell that held a lot of power worked like wish granting, and they both wanted it so one of them could fix something in their past and the other could reclaim their throne from an unworthy soul."
"And so? What's the moral of the story? And were they able to achieve their goal in the end?"
"Figures you'd be interested in that more than anything. But like I've said to you before, a result gained through contemptible means isn't worth anything."
"Still sticking to that belief of yours, huh? The world can't be changed without dirtying hands, Suzaku. There are times when I never intended to use my ability…yet, because I was selfish, you lived; because you lived, you're here now with me."
"How lucky of me."
"Geass is a lot like wish-granting. Don't you think? It's like asking someone to give you the power to achieve what you can't by yourself."
"I wouldn't really call it that."
"Suzaku, my first and best friend, my rival, my Knight…my…" Lelouch speaks, listing the ways he and Suzaku are connected and together in everything they've been through up to now, but faltering on the last label as it's too precious to necessarily need a string of words for a title. Not that they explicitly debated it, but sometimes there's clarity without words. "The hatred of the world is focused on me, so now my existence must be erased and it must be done by you. We'll put an end to this cycle of hate for the world to embrace a better future."
"I know…that this is all for the good of the world. But still, is it really what you want? And…what if I can't do it?"
"Suzaku—"
"What if…I get up on that float—I see your face and your smile of relief at how I'm about to end your life—and I just don't do it?" He proposes his doubts so calmly while inside thoughts and feelings are orchestrating a storm. (He won't cry). It's a bluff, saying that he might not be willing to go through with it. He will do it, because that's what they agreed. But if things were different, they wouldn't need to. He'd be Suzaku and Lelouch would be Lelouch, not just a Prime Minister's son and a Prince but two boys making up memorable parts of each other's lives starting from youthful, simpler days.
'If Geass really has ever been like a wish', Suzaku thinks, squeezing his hand in to a fist, 'then…'
Lelouch stands from his throne to descend the short steps beneath the red carpet, coming close, closer to his Knight until they're right in front of each other, face to face and chest to chest and nose to nose. Addicting Amethyst eyes train to completely focus on gentle Greens. Suzaku doesn't look away, half because he doesn't want to, half because he feels stuck in a perfect time without a 'before now' nor an 'after now'. Lelouch lifts a hand to comfortingly press against a cheek but it's feels as though it holds the weight of the world rather than safety, warmth, trust, and the physical contact feels like an etching curse. And Lelouch gives him such a sympathetic look, it's heart-aching.
Suzaku forces the lump in his throat down.
He won't cry, he won't cry.
"Don't you remember? When we're together, Suzaku, you and I..."
Suzaku ghosts a hand over Lelouch's, half prepared to yank it away but more content with holding it and entwine their fingers, securing the hold, their bond. As he finishes their famous mantra, he seals their fate and sets the world on its new course. "Yeah…we can do just about anything."
AN | If you've read this far and even happened to enjoy it, thank you!
Some things I thought about after:
1) For the first scene where they're dancing, I haven't hinted the sort of music playing. You can imagine it's steady, but I like the idea of smooth, crisp moves coming out in a little more of an upbeat song.
2) I imagine if Suzaku blows out candles on his birthday and wishes for the reveal of secret, Lelouch will tell him something mundane like "I have this or that on my toe" or "I used to think these were that when I was little".
3) "Suspicion" was changed to be set in a chat-room rather than face to face at the last minute. Now it's become awfully long, I know, but I couldn't see a decent place to end it; I like their banter because it's as if they were able to revisit their friendship before the wear and tear placed on it, when they can be two guys giving each other crap in a teasing way.
P.S. I like when songs are selected to represent (parts of) a story, and while looking for a particular Coldplay song I don't know the name of, I was taken to "Everglow", searched up it's lyrics and I think it fits Lelouch and Suzaku pretty well either as friends or more. Especially the lines "Like an eagle you circled in perfect purple" and "Yeah, we swore on that night we'd be friends 'til we died, but the changing of winds and the way waters flow; life as short as the falling of snow, and now I'm gonna miss you, I know".
Otp songs ftw! \ (^▿^)\