Author's Note: This is a two-part fic, set only just post-HBP. The second part is already written so should be up soon :) This is my first attempt at putting my fics on this site, so any feedback is very welcome! Cheers :) -Also, the title is the name of a song by a band called "Embrace". It's a song that has always reminded me of Remus and Tonks' relationship, and is deffos worth a listen :)
Disclaimer:I don't own any of these wonderful characters, they belong to the equally wonderful JK Rowling.

Nature's Law: Part 1

The gentle lull of the rotating fan droned from the bedside table, teasing Tonks' eardrums and her drowsy brain. The familiar heat of summer was beginning to surface, and the cool air resonating from the fan tickled the back of her neck as she gazed sleepily at a sleeping Remus Lupin.

Boyfriend wasn't really an appropriate word to describe Remus. It sounded childish, reminding Tonks with a reminiscent smirk of giggling girls at Hogwarts, swooning over their latest prey. And Tonks had never really been one of those girls. Partner seemed far too formal, as if they had been lumped together for an Order assignment (although, Tonks mused, the only way that any Order mission would ever involve two people getting together was if Molly Weasley and her daughter were named acting heads of the organisation). Lover- lover was far too Mills-and-Boons for her liking. There weren't any labels for their relationship- they weren't exactly conventional, she reflected with a slight snort.

Tonks sighed, and felt her eyes drooping as she lightly traced a dishevelled scar that had made a jagged path from Remus' temple to his stubbled jaw line. She would not change Remus Lupin for the world, but she wished that she could help him, share his burden. She felt completely useless. Not that she would mention this to him: she had learnt that if he in any way thought that he was burdening her, he would disappear before she could say "Hippogriff". He'd proven that over the past year on several occasions, and Tonks had learnt to keep her mouth shut. He was a noble prat, but she loved him all the more for it.

She stifled a yawn as her hand subconsciously moved to his hair, gently combing her fingers through his impossibly soft waves.

"Nymphadora, I'm positive that it's illegal to manhandle somebody whilst they're asleep."

Tonks' hand flew from his head, the shock nearly sending her flying off the bed. A flicker of a grin swept across Remus' face.

"Git," she mumbled, reddening and turning away from him in defiance. She felt the mattress beneath her shake as he chuckled under his breath.

A warm arm snaked around her waist, and Remus narrowed the gap between them, whispering in her ear.

"What's the matter? What's keeping you awake?"

Tonks sighed at his touch, forgetting her annoyance and the unbearable heat as she relaxed into the curve of his lean body, enveloping herself into the familiar smell of new parchment and chocolate frogs.

"It's... It's nothing," she muttered. Thankfully, Remus seemed to understand, as he nearly always did. He did not press the issue, and instead placed a reassuring kiss on the curve of her neck, the brush of his stubble gently tickling her.

Tonks relished these moments, curled against Remus in the silence as if chaos and war were not raging around them, as if Voldemort was merely a fictitious monster created by mothers of unruly children. As if Dumbledore was still alive, she reflected sadly. Here, they were in their own world, where nothing could touch them. It was only in these stolen moments with him that she felt truly safe.

Her recent recurring dream was also something that kept her strong. It appeared mostly when he was away on Order duties, or during her occasional naps at the Ministry. It gave her a sense of hope: as if there was something worth fighting for. It was always the same- the same man, the same boy, and her, all laughing and joking outside the same house, a small white cottage in the middle of a vast cornfield. It made her yearn for a family of her own. She hadn't mentioned this dream to Remus, as she was sure that he would over-analyse it, panic, and end up doing something stupid. Because the truth was, Nymphadora Tonks didn't want to be Remus' girlfriend. She wanted to be his wife.

She bit her lip anxiously. She couldn't go on hiding this feeling-but was it worth the risk? If he walked away, she didn't think that she could cope with the crippling loneliness again. But their days seemed numbered; life was so unpredictable at the minute, with the Death Eaters gaining more and more influence, it was hard to trust anybody- even harder to walk down the street as a certified Order member. People were getting married left right and centre, including Bill Weasley and his girlfriend Fleur, who had announced their engagement earlier that day. Tonks was extremely pleased for them: she had always liked Bill. And yet there was an emptiness inside her that made her feel a pang of jealousy. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea to ask Remus…

"Dora, please go to sleep. You're setting me on edge," Remus mumbled drowsily. She turned back around to face him, drawing in breath to steady her nerves, suddenly feeling completely awake. He enveloped her with his lean, taut arms, kissing her on the forehead with a warm smile.

"It's nice that Bill and Fleur are going to get married," she commented nonchalantly, trying and failing to act casual. Remus stiffened, clearing his throat.

"Erm, yes, I suppose it is," he replied hastily, fumbling to try to cover her mouth with his in a clear attempt to end the discussion. Tonks pulled away, and he arched an eyebrow at her, seemingly as awake as she was. She stared determinedly into his eyes, trying desperately not to be distracted by the fact that his usually neat hair was sticking up at comical angles. He sighed heavily.

"Dora, please don't-"
"Don't what?" she snapped, folding her arms. For the second time that night, she turned away from him. She laid on her back, glaring upwards as if she was trying to burn holes in the ceiling with her eyes. She heard him sigh again as he too rolled onto his back.

"Look, Dora. I've told you before, I would love for us to be an average couple. I'd love for us to be able to walk the streets of Diagon Alley without the disapproving stares. I would love with all my heart to marry you, to call you my wife, Merlin, maybe even start a family. But you know as well as I do that it's impossible."
"Why is it impossible?" Tonks challenged. She heard his teeth grind together.
"You know why, Nymphadora-"
"Don't you 'Nymphadora' me!"

The sense of tranquility drained from the room as Tonks sat bolt upright, glaring at Remus with a new found anger at his self-deprecation.

"It isn't impossible! You're just-you let them get to you, Remus! You're letting them win! If it's what you want to do, then why in the name of Merlin's pants would you let other people's opinions stop you? Or is this just some big cover up? If you don't want to get married, I can understand, but what I can't understand is why you would let other people's blind ignorance hold you back?"
The silence that followed was painful, so awkward that it almost suffocated her.
"I-I'm not going to make you an outcast, Dora," Remus said eventually in a quiet, odd voice. Tonks almost softened at his hurt expression. The premature lines on his face seemed more prominent as his features crumpled. She snapped back to reality, jumping rather clumsily out of the bed and proceeding to pull on his discarded t-shirt.

"I thought you knew what you were getting into. This isn't a fairytale Dora, this is real. And in real life, things aren't perfect." Remus' voice began to grow dangerously in volume. He sat upright, challenging her with a searching stare. She folded her arms defiantly.

"I'm not a child, Remus. I don't expect things to be perfect, but if we both want this-"
"Do you not realise the danger I'm putting you in already?" Remus rose from the bed, and began pacing frantically. "Even if I don't bite you, the Ministry will. Society will. Even your friends may turn against you, and yet you insist that we get married and make the problem ten times worse!"

Tonks ignored him, making her way into the adjacent living room. She could feel Remus following behind her, clumsily dressing as he did so.

"I knew that this would happen," he sighed, defeated. He had begun fiddling with the buttons on his shirt, his hair still rumpled. "I warned you. I-"
"THEN JUST LEAVE!" Tonks finally snapped. Remus froze, stunned. "That's what you're best at, isn't it? Running away from problems, avoiding fixing them at any cost! You know what? I never in a million years thought that I'd find myself saying this, but you're an utter COWARD Remus Lupin!"

Her words seemed to echo around the disheveled flat as the reality of her words sunk in. She swore internally. Remus held her gaze for an agonising moment, looking more pained, more hurt than she had ever seen him. They stayed staring at each other for what seemed to Tonks like an eternity, until finally Remus moved silently back into the bedroom.

"No-I-Remus, I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"
Remus had emerged, his tie loose around his neck. He began pulling on his shoes, avoiding her gaze determinedly.

"Remus, it's late, I-I'm just tired, can we not just-"
He pushed past her as he retrieved his coat from the rack. Here they were again. Tonks didn't have the strength to run after him: she had done that far too many times. The front door slammed behind him with a bitterly familiar bang, and once again, Nymphadora Tonks was left alone.

She swore under her breath. She had got him back for a grand total of 2 weeks, and she had already messed everything up. Tonks did not remember falling back onto the haggard settee, but that was where she lay- curled in a ball, enveloped in Remus' t-shirt. New parchment and chocolate frogs. Hot tears rolled down her cheeks as she let sleep take her, emotional exhaustion draining her of all feeling.