A Deer Caught in Headlights. (Shikamaru's feelings)
Chapter One: The new son
An average morning feel upon konoha. The feelings and thoughts of the current issues were gone. As if with the birth of a new "Sun", the problems of yesterday would seize to exist for just a little while. And even though this sun was bringing warmth to the boy's face, the same boy who stood outside of the hospital, the air was so cold. Biting at his soft cheeks and nose as if the air it's self had teeth. He could see his breath today, but couldn't tell much if it was really his breath, or actually the cigarette smoke,
He always said he hated the smoke. The smell of it, the way it burned his eyes. Right now he didn't even like the way it made him feel. But it was like if he didn't, he wouldn't honor the memory of his beloved teacher, Asuma. "Your baby..it's a real loud one. I can hear him crying from all the way down here..how about you..can you hear him from all the way up there Asuma sensei?" Shikamaru asked as he looked up at the sky. As if finally talking to the clouds he always stares at it.
"Finally snapped there kid?" Came a familiar voice. The voice was followed by clicking of feet against concrete steps. Well, perhaps not followed, instead the voice preceded the steps long ago, but Shikamaru's senses had become far too dulled at the moment. It was Anko Mitarashi. The older woman was close to Kurenai Yuhi. However, she was no where near as close as Shikamaru was to her lately. When the boy wasn't on missions, he was there with her, like a her very own shadow. Anko sighed as she snatched the cigarette from Shikamaru's mouth. "The hokakge tell you your allowed to smoke? Wait until you got some pubic hair kid!" She said all with a grinn on her face disposed of the lit cancer stick with her bare hand. Smothering it and put it nice and easy into Shikamaru's vest pocket.
"Hey..what if i'm developing a new jutsu with it?" He asked her in protest, Trying to speak over her loud laughing wasn't easy. "Anko-sempai..are you drunk?" Came another question. Though from her red face and trippy attitude, it was obvious she was. He sighed deeply as she pat him hard on the back, making him cough just a bit. "Yeah so what...!" She paused for a moment to look at the sky again. "She's okay you know? You can go home kid. Or rather than that, go hang out with Choji or Ino. I know for a fact they've been a bit lonely. The only time they see yo is when there risking there lives beside you.." Anko tried to tell him without cracking a smile. She was serious about this. It wasn't health for him to be worrying so much about a woman who could very well handle her self.
"Besides, you stick around any longer and the staff is gonna think your the father." She grinned and started laughing once more. Shikamaru had lowered his eyes to the ground, and kept them there. She didn't have to put it like that, the thing about Ino and and Choji,. They understood right? Besides that, the more time he allowed the pair to spend alone, maybe they'll start connecting. He knew that Choji wanted a romantic relationship with Ino. Even if he didn't show it most of the time. He was just shy is all. "Anko..what's so wrong about that anyway...? Looking like the father I mean?" He asked boldly.
"Your not serious...are ou? You don't have feelings for Kurenai do you? Look Shikamaru. I know your on some honorable justice mission to protect your sensei's lover and child, but that never gave you permission to start falling in love with her." Anko stated, She tried her best to keep her voice down.
Since when did one need permission to fall in love? Shikamaru thought to himself. And maybe it wasn't really him that was making the first move. Maybe it was a mutual thing. Any relationship, at least in Shikamaru's eyes, would grow with the more time you spent with the someone. Forget age, rank, and decree. His feelings of attraction were only natural. It wasn't like he was going to act on them.
"I hate bossy woman. And I don't really care for older woman either. All I want is a simple girl, around my age, and-" He was caught off suddenly by Anko's finger to his lips. "Shut up, just go up and say high to the baby. He can't see asuma on the first day of his life..but I guess your the next best thing uh? Go on." Anko smiled as she took her finger from his lips and started to walk off down the stone path that feed back into the streets.
For a moment in time all he could do was stand there. Almost as if what he did now, wither he walked forward and went to Choji's place or wither he instead turned around to see Kurenai was epic choice. Something that would change his life forever. But it wasn't. He knew that but still he hesitate a little in turning around and stepping inside the hospital. Taking it slowly up the stairs to her room, he found him self staring at the door. The baby wasn't crying. Lists of reasons ran through his head. Maybe Kurenai was breast feeding him. Did woman breast feed this early? Maybe something is wrong with the baby. Or it could just be sleeping.
In the middle of Shikamaru's whirlwind of thoughts came a soft voice. "Shikimaru..is that you" Kurenai whispered from the other side of the door, making his eyes shoot open just a bit. His heart thumped hard. "Y-..yeah it's me." He replied. Hearing something on the lines of 'come in'. He wondered as he turned the door nob, was his breath that loud? Or was his thoughts slipping out of his lips as he stood there?
When the door was pushed back, his view of her unobstructed, he almost wanted to let his mouth drop open. The light from the window hit the two beautiful creatures lay on a clean hospital bed just right. The perfect time for a camera. He smiled as the baby was already acting on his curious nature. Pulling at Kurenai's long black hair and smacking her face gently. Both laughing and giggling. Shikamaru's eyes narrowed slightly as he looked down. Ausma would of love to see this. He didn't know either he should be seeing this for Asuma, or if it was wrong to take in a sight that was meant for his sensei.
"Heheh..Shikamaru, why are you just standing there? Come on over and met him!" She demand in a playful tone. Shikamaru looked up and smiled, gulping just a bit, doing what he was asked. He smiled down a the baby boy. Noting his eyes immediately. It ws Kurenai's eyes, but he already showed a few signs of having his father's face. He would continue to play without even noting Shikamaru's presence in that room till he was tired out. Falling asleep in the woman's arms.
"Got your yes..and Asuma's smile..gonna turn out to be a lady killer, poor him." He said with a slight smile. Kurenai turned her head to the side a bit. "And what exactly is wrong with that? Your the same aren't you? Ino, and even that girl from the sand village, you have plenty of woman to pick from because of your own charms Shikamaru." She said to him, receiving a sigh. "No its not like that...besides. Both of them are pretty loud and bossy. Not my type..ahh..what a drag." He said as he cracked his neck a bit and rubbed at his shoulder. "Well then..what is your type..Choji perhaps?" Kurenai grinned, Expecting a nice reaction from that, and getting one immediately.
"Whaa...what!" He shouted, getting a stir out of the baby. Kurenai quickly shushed him. He sulked a little before hoping his mouth to speak once again in a whispering voice. "Don't joke like that Kurenai-sense-" "Just Kurenai." Shikamaru's eyes widened once again. "What?" He asked leaning in closer to her to hear her more clearly, as she hushed her voice as well to keep from waking the napping infant. "You're close enough to me now..to just call me Kurenai" She whispered. Her smile in the some how warm and cold sunlight sent chills through him.
Are woman who give birth this beautiful? Or could it be I've just missed it? Missed her beauty that was staring me in the face the whole time. These and many more thoughts was running through Shikamaru's mind. But not of these thoughts included the reason his lips were drawing ever so closer to her own. Why her face started to light up in red as she looked like a defenseless shy girl. Age disappeared, time left for the day, and any detail of the room or the entire world was pointless. Only she had meaning at this moment. "Kurenai.." Shikamaru uttered her name helplessly as he was becoming adsorbed by her beautiful form. There lips only a half breath away before Shikamaru heard the rapid clicking of feet against tile behind him. Someone was coming into the room!
His heart pounded, and he snapped up. His back straight as a board and his head turned toward the open door. There was ino, the blonde haired beauty in all her glory. Just coming in on a half step. Nearly having to skid to a stop. She looked like she had a disappointed face for only a instant before a wide smile came over it. Shikamaru didn't know if that face was there because she had seen or something else. Either way it was a struggle to put on a smile and move. Out of her way. "Hey ino" He spoke to her, she immediately talked over him. "Awww! Look at him! He's so cute!"
Kurenai didn't seem to struggle as hard as Shikamaru did to put her heart back into check and her blush washed away without a trace. She smiled up at ino and then back down at her child. "Yes he is, but right now he's taking a little nap. He has played a little too much today." Ino put the bouquet of flowers on the table beside Kurenai's bed where they would get the most sun. "These flowers here mean good health and motherhood." Ino said as she arranged them just right. This was certainly her talent. Shikamaru knew how well Ino could bring a smile to people's face with just a glance at her flowers. And even form here there smell ticked at his nose. A wonderful scent.
However, Shikamaru couldn't focus on that sent no matter how hard he tried. His heart still wouldn't stabilize, and as Ino's eyes hit him in a passing glance, he felt a wave of guilt and shame. There was no logical reason for this feeling. It wasn't rational and it made no sense. Ino wasn't his girl friend and Kurenai wasn't his lover. But something about having them here in the same room after he was about to kiss one of them made want to run away from the situation entirely.
"Hey Ino." He spoke, interrupting the two female's light conversation. "Where is Choji?" Ino looked questioningly as if that was a silly question to ask. She looked at the door and realized he hadn't came in with her. "Oh thats right..he told me to give Kurenai his best wishes, He was going to go visit Asuma.." Ino said a bit sad. This wasn't really the time to bring up bad memories. It didn't seem to effect Kurenai to much though. Shikamaru on the other hand couldn't look worst if you hit him with a brick. He looked down, finally settling from the embarrassment of before. That emotion of guilty now exchanged for a worst one, sadness. He started to head for the door.
Ino watched him for a moment, desperately wanting to change the mood here. "Oh! Um..Kurenai..what are you going to name him?" She said, awkward yet cheerful in her pursuit of a lighter atmosphere. Kurenai held her head up confidently. "Asuma Sarutobi Yuhi"
Shikamaru stopped in his tracks, looking back at Kureani and the baby. It brought a smile to his face. It was as if a little piece of asuma, small but still significant, was reborn. Ino smiled as well, both of them speaking in unison. "Good name." With that, Shikamaru left out of the door, and Ino started out of the window.
It didn't take too long for Shikamaru to get to the grave yard. As he walked, he did so slowly, and with caution in each and very step. Every single headstone here was important, from those of the honored Hokages to the one's of people KIA. Reaching on such KIA grave stone, who's head stone always had flower's placed around it. And today, it had a person standing there before it. His eyes set downwards, his form wide shaped and strong. Long brown hair blowing in the slight breeze of the morning. Left without his signature bag of chips. "Choji.."
Shikamaru whispered the other male's name. He turned and smiled at Shikamaru for only a brief moment before turning back to the head stone. This person, among everyone else in his life, was the one her felt most comfortable with. He'd eat with this guy, laugh with him, cry with him. Fight along side him, and die along with him. Shikamaru was always proud to call Choji his best friend. But ever since that last mission where there team, squad 10, was out for revenge against there teacher's murder, a gap has grown between them. A small one that at first just came in the form of lost hellos and far to easy goodbyes. That evolved into skipped outings and forgotten practice time.
Shikamaru stood beside Choji in silence, till the larger male finally broke the awkward mood. "How is Kureani..the baby come without any problems?" He asked looking at Shikamaru from the corner of his eye. "Yup, she's fine, and there hasn't been any problems." Shikamaru said, soon hearing a reply of "That's good." The veil of silence covers them once more. "So...where have you been?" Choji finally asked. "What do you mean? I've been here," Even though he said that, he knew exactly what Choji meant by that question.
"Every time me and Ino try to get a hold of you..your never there, or you'll make up some kind of excuse. Kurenai can't possibly need that much protection." Choji groaned. Shikamaru was silent, but choji stared at him, waiting for a satisfying answer. "I made a vow...I'll protect that child..I'll protect her." Shikamaru looked choji in the eye. His best friend's brown orbs to shake a little. "People are starting to think you two are a couple. That joke isn't funny anymore. I'm not saying don't protect her, but maybe you might want to back of just a little bit. you've got a life to you know.
What choji was saying made sense. Shikamaru couldn't deny that. "What about you and Ino? Got any closer because I've been gone?" Shikamaru said honestly thinking his absents might of bright the two closer. "....Shikamaru!" Choji yelled right before bunching the smaller boy in the face, Sending him to the ground with the force of his large fist. "Aren't you supposed to be a genius!? No...more than that, aren't you supposed to be my best friend!?" Choji yelled at the man Choji's anger and rage slowly starting to leave his body. Shikamaru needed a good punch in the face, and Choji need a out lit for his frustration.
"Having you there with us makes us all closer idiot. How dare you just assume I wanted to be romantic with Ino. I like it when all three of us hang out. If I ever felt that way about her...your the linchpin in our relationship. One of the reason it could exist in the first place..don't just do a vanishing at on me you idiot.." Choji spilled his frustration in the form of words. Shikamaru receiving each and ever word. He slowly picked him self up, rubbing his brushed cheek. "Sorry..I haven't been much of a friend. Your right. I won't be leaving you guys anymore." He tried a light smile. Choji responded in a nod.
As the two stood there, traveling down memory lane in their minds, Shikamaru took out Asuma's old lighter. Taking out one of those white and yellow cancer sticks, Putting hit between his lips he lit it. Taking a long drag of it before exhaling the smoke into the shifting air. He was getting used to the taste of cigarette. He wondered how asuma himself started smoking. Choji didn't say a word. Knowing Shikamaru smoked as tribute to Asuma, and not as a need, The wind shifted, the grass swayed to one side along with it. However the wind suddenly seemed stronger. Almost violent. Shikamaru suddenly found his cigarette cut clean in half. The wind stopping after a odd clanking sound. Both pair of eyes drifted over to the source.
"Smoking is quite a bad habit. But a smart ass like you should know that already right?" Enter the third..and hopefully final, apparent love interest.