The baby looked up at me with his huge, blue eyes. His feathery black hair was just beginning to cover his head. He blinked, yawned, and titled his head upwards. His name was Sam Perry Gilligan Dorian. He was the best thing that had ever happened to me.
I picked my son up and cradled him in my arms.
"Make sure you have him back by three" his mother warned me. I smiled at her. Even though I didn't love her, and even though I hated to admit it, she was a pretty damn amazing woman. And the new guy she was seeing, Clark, was a nice guy too.
He'd a better dad to my son than me. He was tall, strong, good at sports, handsome. And then there was me. Pathetic, weedy, could barely get my life together.
And Clark was unmistakably straight.
I was not.
I pondered this as I wheeled Sam down to my apartment in his pushchair. I was still confused about the feelings I had for that certain person…snap out of it JD! Not while Sammy's around. You don't want him to be a screw-up as well, do you?
I opened the door to the flat, and wheeled him in. I placed my son on the sofa, so that we could watch what was going on, but he squirmed and whimpered, so I picked him up again. Hell, I was a better mom than Kim was!
I suddenly heard a beeping sound. I brushed it off the first time, but then it came again. Maybe it was a mobile or something…
I looked around for the source of the beeping. After 10 minutes of frantic searching, I found it in my jacket pocket. It was a pager. The message on it said thanks for helping me with Mr Scalot, Perry!
Perry?
Then the realisation hit me. I had picked up Dr Cox's pager by mistake. He must have mine. Well, I had to go to his apartment to get it back. I didn't have his mobile number; he had denied me that, saying that I would be persistently calling him until he threw it at a window in annoyance.
I put Sammy in his pushchair again, and wheeled him down the flats and through the streets to Dr Cox's house.
But once outside, I didn't think I could go in. Get a grip, JD! He's not going to kill you! Not while you have the kid with you. Or would he…? Oh, for God's sake get on with it!
I pushed the buzzer, and went up to his flat. I rang his doorbell. He answered it.
"Oh for God's sakes, Newbie, what do you want?"
"I've got your pager, and I think you've got mine. I need swapsies. Can I come in?"
"Fine…"
He motioned me in and walked off to find his jacket.
"Who's the kid?" he called from inside his bedroom. For a moment I was slightly stunned, before realising that Dr Cox hadn't seen my son yet, despite the namesake.
"My son, Sam"
"You mean you finally got it together with your boyfriend and started a family? That's great! Hm…he's got his mother's face!"
"Yep, I get it, I'm a girl" I muttered.
"Oh no, Natalie, you're much more than that! You're a little girl with cute pigtails and a pony who dreams of unicorns and candyland every night!" replied my mentor, chucking my pager at me. I missed, and bent to pick it up.
"Heard it all before. Sticks and stones, Dr Cox! It doesn't hurt any more!"
It always hurts…
"Well, that's just fantastic, Newbie. Come on, scram. I'm sure Gilmore Girls or whatever girly soap you and Ghandi are watching now is on soon"
"Wow, you're such a great host…"
"I know! The brilliance that God gave me is sometimes a burden, not to mention my fa-habulous body!"
How could a body as great as that be a burden?
"Come on, Newbie, scram. You know how much I hate having you follow me around like a little lapdog"
"That's not strictly true"
"What?"
"If you hate having me around so much, then how come you always wait for me before work and then have a go at me when I'm late? Why do you always whistle for me to come to your beck and call?"
"Oh, for God's sake, Gina, quit being such a…well, girl, and get out of my apartment!"
"If you hate me so much, Perry, then why do you let me follow you around?"
"I think you know the reason is, Gladys, is that you won't leave me alone!"
"Fine. How about this: I leave you alone for a week?"
"Newbie, that would be just peachy-dandy! Now for the love of God, get out of my apartment before I kill you!"
So, I did.
Damn me and my big mouth.
This was gonna be a long week.