An author's note is placed here, at the top, because it is important to the story. It is written backwards, in a sense, meaning that the most recent events are written first, and the events that happened before those, are written after.
In the end, that's all she would be.
She's just going along with the plan, telling him all of the secrets. That's her job. That's what he wants her to do. So, she'll do it. Without question, she'll do it. That's the way it works. He wants their plans, and she gives them to him. No matter how painful, how horribly painful, it is, she'll tell him because that's all there is to it. Whispers into the scythe charm are forever echoing through her ears, a reminder that this is all she is. A spy. A puppet. That's all Silena is, and that's all she will be. He is the one in charge, and she is forever the one following orders, being controlled. This is just the life of Silena Beauregard. Servant is a word more suited for the girl. Traitors have a choice, but she is simply being forced into this mess. So, this is who she is.
Angry voices hiss commands to the girl. Each word cuts like the scythe she wears on the bracelet that shines with a cruel silver light. She can tell there's no escape. She's in too deep. She's never going back. She's one of them now, one of the cowards taking orders from anyone who gives them. She doesn't like it, but she knows. She can tell that this is the rest of her life. Spying, lying, whispering secrets that lives depend on. In the end, she's just as much of a murderer as they are. That's her future. That's her past. And that's what she's doing now. Spying for Luke-but-not-Luke, lying to the people she loves, and telling those precious secrets she swore to keep. But she has to because that's who she is now. She's nothing more than another piece in the complex puzzle of Kronos's army. And she's the missing one in the jigsaw of Camp Half-Blood. She can't belong to both, and a clammy, cold hand is pulling her closer to the nearly-complete, monstrous puzzle she's been trying to avoid, but is being dragged closer to each day. The once stinging sensation that came with this arrangement is now luminal. And, weakly, the girl obeys everything she's told, repeating the green-eyed boy's words exactly.
"Coward!" several voices cry in her head. She thinks one is her own. It's too loud to tell without a struggle. If she is one of the voices, she agrees with herself. And Charlie, and Chiron, and Percy. All of them. They're all right. Every single person she's ever known screams the ugly word at her. Pale, glittering tears slide down their cheeks. It's all her fault. Everything that went wrong is her fault. They're dying. Because of her they're dying. She deserves every last name they call her—even that particularly nasty one—because they're being killed because of her. At first, it isn't obvious what happened to them all, but soon it's clear. Blood becomes more obvious on their faces, their hands, their bodies, the ground, and mixes with the tears, swirling unpleasantly down their flushed cheeks. There's nothing she can do now. She's just as helpless as ever. They'll be dead soon, and she can't stop it because she's just another useless puppet of the Titan Lord. They make their last breaths, and Silena wakes up in a cold sweat from her nightmare.
The icy metal burns as it meets Silena's cheek. The freezing weather is a contributing factor, as is the knowledge of what awful deed comes next. She brushes the cold silver three times, and then speaks in a hollow voice.
"Hello, Luke."
A reply as chilly as the air comes her way, and he gives a final word. "Information?"
Each detail is exact. She recites each fact perfectly, word for word. Every piece of information she has, he now has.
"Clarisse," he said finally, summing up her tale. "Labyrinth, eh?"
Forgetting that he couldn't see her, Silena nodded tightly and silently.
Luke raises his voice slightly, and Silena speaks, while he continues. "Thank you," he finishes insincerely. "That has been quite informative."
Silena drops the arm with the bracelet to her side. And it's over. And again, she's saving and killing.
Luke smiles at her warmly and his blue eyes shine kindly. "Will you, Silena?"
She looks hopeful. It's a good opportunity, a safe one. "No one will get hurt? No one will get killed?" Ever-changing eyes look at him expectantly.
"No one. All you have to do is tell me exactly what's happening at camp while I'm gone. Really, it's a great deal." He laughs, but Silena can hardly tell why.
She smiles back anyway. "Really? That's all I have to do? And everyone will be okay? You swear, Luke? Luke, you promise?"
His scarred face smiles at her like a boy from a magazine. "Yeah," he agrees casually. "Sure." He kisses her on the forehead and walks away coolly.
And that's it. She is now his to control. He's bought her.
A Barbie. That's all she is. Silena will never be anything more. Really, she isn't anything but a Barbie, a puppet, a toy. Just another plaything of the world. She doesn't control herself, he does. Her perfect looks are Barbie doll-esque, as is her personality. All she does is anything anyone wants.
AN: It was certainly a new concept for me...the whole backwards thing. What do you think? Am I the only one who noticed how I tend to avoid, avoid, avoid dialogue until the very end of the story, and bam, that's all there is? It's one of the weird things about me, I guess. I'm not sure if I should have breaks or not, seeing as there are extreme changes in setting and time. But I think if I had a break with every one of those, it would be messy. Hm. I just felt like writing Silena the day I typed this up, if you wanted an explanation. And according to , luminal is a word. It was the word of the day a while ago, and I wanted to include it.
-Lexi