Type: Songfic
Rated: K
Pairing: Sasuke/Naruto
Why does this always happen to me? Why is it that my life is such a living hell? Why is it that I'm gay? Why is it that the person I love is a man? And why does it have to be my best friend? All these questions I have yet to answer. And all these questions relate back to one person. One Sasuke Uchiha.
Sasuke is a wonderful man if not a little bit standoffish. Okay, well maybe a lot. But that's not the point. He always helps me train. Always makes me push myself in order to show him that I'm better, that I don't need him to protect me all the time, that I can protect myself. He's beautiful, intelligent, hardworking, mean, kind, a smart-ass, and so many other things that it would take me a lifetime to tell you all of them. But I wouldn't mind that, I love to talk about him any chance I get.
The problem that I'm having is that Sasuke is not gay. Thus, making my life a living hell because I always have to hear that I'm never good enough from him. That I'll never amount to anything the way I am. That there are so many girls around him and so many other people that are so much better than me that are girls. I know that he still wants to rebuild his clan. He can't do that with me. I will never in my life be able to give him that no matter how many experiments I try, no matter how many operations I go through, and no matter how many times I beg the demon inside me to give me a womb; it will never happen.
So right now, I'm walking down a very lonely road. Its dark and there are no lights to guide you and no houses to show that you're not alone. When I walk down these roads if find that I make many revelations about myself, but this time instead of reflecting on what I've done or what I should have said or did I start to sing. Not just any song mind you, but one that has all my feelings wrapped up in it. One that I wish I could sing to Sasuke.
"My Wish"
I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,
But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
And you always give more than you take.
But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
This is my wish
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big
I started to cry no matter how many times I say to myself that I'll just find another not one person has been able to relate to me as he does, not one person has been able to fill my heart with such joy when I look at them as he has. I know that he will never be mine, and I know that I should give up, but it's just so hard.
I look to the blackened sky and the first thing I see is a tiny, tiny star struggling to shine brighter and brighter. I can't help but think that, that star is somehow me. No matter how much I have improved, no matter how many times I have moved up in ranks, I seem to shine no brighter than before. My efforts seem to be in vain.
My eyes fill with more and more tears that no longer can I see that tiny, struggling star, no longer can I see any star, for they have all blurred together. And for a moment I thought I saw the one thing I wanted most, but I must be imagining it. I rub my eyes of the tears but when I open them again he is gone. I knew that he could not be here. I am far away from the village, far from any civilization, so why would he be. Why would I imagine Sasuke sitting in a tree staring at me with such sorrow? If I were to imagine anything it would be of Sasuke returning my feelings. So why this?
What do you think happened? Was Sasuke really there or was it just a figment of Naruto's imgaination? You tell me.
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B.B.A. (BlackBloodedAngel)