Chapter 1 - After The Hit

.Set in Season 2.

After John's death, Sam and Dean head to Bobby's for a while. Whilst Dean is fixing up the Impala, Sam is dealing with problems of his own. Every attempt Sam makes at trying to talk to Dean goes south. But when will it become too much for Sam to deal with on his own? And will Dean be too late to take anything back?

"I say we hall ass to Bobby's and take a few off. Give me time to work on Baby," Dean commented, not even bothering to take a look at his brother.

"Dean, we need to talk about what happened yesterday," Sam commented, one hand placed on his throbbing head and the other covering the white hot pain in his abdomen.

"No we don't Sam, let's just leave it at that," Dean snapped, shooting his brother down as he sped up, Metallica playing on the radio as they started the drive to Bobby's.

"Dean," Sam began, cringing in pain as he desperately tried to get his brother to listen to him.

"Sam! I just said no! God why do you have to be such a baby! I don't want to talk!" Dean snapped, turning up the radio in hopes to mask out his brothers words.

Sure Dean regretted what he had just said, lately Dean's been regretting a lot of things, but right now he just needed silence so he could think things through.

-You have to save Sam... but if you can't save him Dean, you're going to have to kill him.-

When did John ever think that Dean would kill Sammy? His Sammy. Sure John had been an idiot in the past but if he thought for a second that Dean would even contemplate killing his little Sammy, then John needed to stop with the Whisky. Dean was not killing Sammy, period. No more words said on the matter.

Sam tried not to make a sound as his head smashed against his skull, the loud music wasn't helping, but the throbbing of his head matched the beats to whatever song was playing. He tried to breathe through it, but couldn't. He wouldn't be able to get any painkillers without drawing attention to himself and allowing Dean to think that he was more of a girl who couldn't handle a small headache. He wanted Dean to be happy again, he wanted Dean to be better. But he was in pain too, John was his father too. What part of that did Dean not understand? So instead, Sam tried to get some sleep. And after a while, he was finally successful.

Sam shot up in awakening, his nightmare still flashing through his mind as he tried to calm down his raspy breathing. Something was wrong with him, and Sam knew it too. He just wanted to ignore it and take painkillers so he could be there for Dean.

Dean. Sam needed to tell Dean what was going on. But how could he do that when all he did was shoot Sam down, it was impossible to talk to Dean when he was like this. So Sam decided to stick to his own problems. At least for a while. Sam looked across from him, no Dean. But that was only because they had reached Bobby's.

-Are we really that broken that Dean didn't even wake me to tell me that we were here?-

Sam stood out of the car, looking around the area and seeing the place he knew as his second home. The Impala being his first.

He took his duffel bag from the back of the truck Bobby let them use and walked inside, hearing 2 voices, Bobby and Dean. He didn't want to interrupt so he just walked up the stairs, setting his bag down on the bed furthest from the door, because Dean always took the one closest from the door. He has since they were kids.

Sam took out the painkillers and took 2. Placing the rest back in his duffle bag. He wanted to tell Dean what was going on, but hell... he didn't even know what was going on. So he decided to wait a few days, and if it continued, he'd go to the doctor himself. Until then, he would try and talk to Dean.

Sam walked downstairs, and into the library, reading up on a few cases, wondering how he could help.

"What're you doin' in here Sam?" Bobby asked, appearing out of nowhere beside the door.

"Researching for a new case," Sam responded, not bothering to look up from the newspaper.

"Why don't you try talkin' to your brother?" Bobby asked with a sigh.

"He won't listen right now, I'll talk to him later," Sam responded. Secretly just wanting Bobby to leave him alone. Truth was, he didn't feel like talking to anyone right now. Just wanted to be left alone.

"Damn it boy! Something's wrong with ya' and if you won't talk to someone at least make sure you're takin' care of yourself," Bobby snapped. Obviously sensing how damaged Sam was at the moment. He just wanted his boys to be okay. Even if it took all the time in the world.

"Nothing's wrong Bobby, I feel fine," Sam lied, the last thing he wanted to do was involve Bobby on something he had no clue on.

-Not even here for half an hour and he's already on my case. That's Bobby for ya' though.-

But his body betray him as a rack of coughs filled his lungs.

"I call bullshit," Bobby commented. Before walking away, saying something along the lines of 'Winchesters'. Sam pulled his hand back and found the dark red substance that scared him.

Blood. His blood.

'Pretty sure that's not supposed to happen' Sam thought, getting up from his chair and getting a tissue to clean the blood from his hand.

He needed to tell Dean, and if Dean wasn't going to listen then he was going to go to the hospital on his own. Something was wrong. And Sam knew it.

3 days later...

Sam couldn't hide the agony he was feeling anymore. He tried resting but that never did anything, he was constantly tired. Tried eating but all he did was throw it back up again. He had so far had more nosebleeds than he could count and passed out more than that. As well as the more than occasional coughing and throwing up blood.

It was time to tell Dean. It was time to try and seek his big brothers help. Hoping it would go well, Sam limped outside to his brother. The suns rays burning his eyes and throbbing against his skull.

"Dean," Sam began.

"What?" Dean snapped from underneath the Impala.

"Dean I need to talk to you," Sam told.

"Not right now Sam" Dean snapped, his voice even rougher than before.

"Dean, please. I need your help, something's wro-" He began.

"I said not right now. God, I can't place a bandage on everything for you. Take care
of yourself for once!" Dean snapped.

Sam nodded his head, coughing once again. Each cough matched the throbbing pain in his head. He had to go to the hospital, and by the sounds of things... he'd be going alone.

Sam walked inside, leaving his jacket and taking the keys to the truck Bobby let them take whenever the Impala was out of use. This was something Sam couldn't handle on his own, and if Dean weren't going to help him than he had to do it himself, he had to be there for Dean right now. They had just lost their father, of course Sam had to be there for Dean. But right now he need to make sure he was alright, that nothing was fatally wrong with him. Because hell, it felt like something was wrong.

"Where ya goin' Sam?" Bobby asked from the library door. He always came at the most random times and showed up in the most random places. But that's something that made him Bobby.

"Just out for a bit." Sam responded wrapping his arm around his throbbing abdomen.

"How 'bout we cut the crap and I ask again? Where ya goin' Sam?" Bobby asked once more, this time more firmly.

"Hospital." Sam sighed, he couldn't lie to Bobby, and it wasn't like he was lying to Dean. His brother wouldn't listen. But Sam couldn't place the blame on Dean. He never could.

"Why do ya need to go to the hospital Sam?" Bobby asked, concern striking the oldest hunter.

"It's probably nothin' just a few bumps and bruises." Sam shrugged like nothing was wrong. Sure he wanted to believe that it was nothing. But he had a feeling that something was wrong. And it hurt to much to suggest otherwise.

"Alright, let me get the truck and I'll tell Dean to get ready." Bobby sighed hesitantly, but knowing there was something wrong with the youngest.

"What? No Bobby it's... fine." Sam gasped at the strike of pain he felt himself dealing with.

"Don't argue with me boy. I'm takin' you to the hospital, and I'm sure Dean will wanna see what's goin' on." Bobby snapped walking towards Sam and helping distribute his weight.

"Already tried letting Dean know. He didn't list- AH!" Sam gasped in pain gripping his head and wrapping a hand around his abdomen in complete agony.

"Shit! Alright then I'll call Dean from the hospital." Bobby informed, rushing Sam outside to his truck quickly, trying to make it less painful for Sam as he did so. As soon as Sam was seated in the car he had passed out, blood pooling out of his nose and mouth.

"Sam!" Bobby barked worriedly, trying to get the youngest awake. But nothing worked. So he sped off towards the hospital. Cursing both the Winchester's and begging that they both be okay, mentally and physically.

4 hours later...

Dean stood up from the Impala. Brushing his hands together in triumph. He had finally finished mending the Impala. But now he didn't know what else to do, there had to be something else to distract him other than drowning himself in whisky. Although... Nah, he did that last night.

He would've gone inside, he would've taken his plate in that once had his lunch on it. He would've gone straight in, washed the dishes, stayed clear of a certain little brother, and then taken a nice well deserved shower. Dean would've done all those things, if it weren't for a phone call he'd received from Bobby.

"I thought you were in the house? How long have you been gone?" Dean questioned confusingly, he hadn't seen nor noticed Bobby leave the house. Dreading the fact that it meant he was at the salvage yard alone with Sam.

"Around 4 hours now. But... Dean..." Bobby began, the sound of his tone immediately told the hunter that whatever was happening was really, really bad.

"What?" Dean whispered, not wanting to lift his voice anymore than necessary.

"You need to get to the hospital, it's Sam. The doctors want you to come here..." Bobby began.

"Bobby, I can't be there. I've got things to do here. Whatever the doctors need me for I'm sure you can help out with. And Sam's gonna be fine. I can't keep placing bandages..." Dean began his interruption, but stopped as Bobby spoke the words Dean would never forget.

"Let me finish," Bobby interrupted and after a few moments of silence from the other end of the line, he continued. "The doctors want you to come here and say goodbye."

He didn't know how long it had been. Didn't know whether his heart moved to his throat or stomach. Didn't know how long he stood there, shock on his face. But he finally kicked himself into gear.

"No. No. What do you mean goodbye?! Sam is perfectly fine! No! Damn it Bobby I'm on my way. And you better give me an explaination." Dean growled in a menacing tone before hanging up the phone. And within three seconds he was in the newly rebuilt Impala and speeding off towards the hospital. This was not what he was expecting the first drive in freshly build Impala to go. But as he left he began thinking. Regretting each thing he said to his little brother.

-I said not right now. God, I can't place a bandage on everything for you. Take care of yourself for once!-

-God why do you have to be such a baby! I don't want to talk!-

-These are your issues, quit dumping them on me.-

-I just think it's really interesting, this sudden obedience you have to Dad. Its like, 'Oh, what would Dad want me to do?' Sam, you spent your entire life slugging it out with that man. I mean, hell, you picked a fight the last time you ever saw him. And now that he's dead, now you want to make it right. Well, I'm sorry Sam but you can't. It's too little, too late.-

"Shut up!" Dean barked at his voice playing over and over, playing the words that were designed to hurt his little brother when he was already hurting both mentally and physically.

-This is kinda what you wanted isn't it. You wanted to avoid Sam, didn't wanna talk to him. Didn't want him around. Well now you'll never have to avoid him, never have to talk to him. Never have to see him.-

"No! That's not what I meant. Damn it Sammy you better be okay! This better be some stupid ass joke! Damn it!" Dean barked at absolutely nothing at all. Tears threatening to fall.

-Don't worry. By the time you get there it'll be 'too little too late'.-

"No!" Was Dean's final cry before he reached the hospital. Barging out of the door and bolting into the hospital. Looking around and pleading for someone to guide him.

"Dean..." He was thankful that the voice came when it did.

"Bobby." Dean's worry and scarce were immediately replaced with rage. "What happened to my baby brother? Where. Is. Sam?" Dean growled menacingly.

"Sit down Dean." Bobby whispered a plead.

"No you tell me now." Dean spat.

"The accident you three were in, left your Daddy wounded and unconscious and you on deaths door. We all thought Sam got out of it unscathed. We were wrong on so many levels. When I was driving Sam to the hospital he passed out as I got him into the car and I found that he had stopped breathing by the time we got to the hospital. They took him in and needed surgery. He had a haemorrhage in his brain and they got it fixed as soon as they could, he had lost a lot of blood from nosebleeds, vomiting and coughing. As I was taking him here he was bleeding from the mouth. He had broken and cracked ribs." Bobby explained, not taking notice of how Dean had collapsed to the floor in complete shock until he had almost finished.

"B-Bobby... wha- Why do they think he isn't gonna make it?" Dean whispered, still not letting his tears fall.

"He slipped into a coma Dean. And they say that he isn't gonna wake up." Bobby told, kneeling down to Dean's level and comforting the kid as best as he could.

"Sam Winston!" A nurse called throughout the waiting room. Bobby stood up and walked towards the nurse, so Dean stood up and followed.

"We've met Doctor Mildred. This is Sam's brother, Dean." Bobby introduced.

"Nice to meet..." Dr Mildred began.

"Spare me the nice chit chat and lead me to my brother." Dean ordered.

"Yes sir, he's in I.C.U at the moment. I've spoken to Sam's doctor and he has allowed you both to stay past visiting hours, he thinks that you both should get as much time with Sam as you can. He maybe in a coma but he can still hear everything you say." Dr Mildred informed, leading Bobby and Dean towards Sam's room as she gave them the information.

"I take it Dean has been informed..." Dr Mildred spoke to Bobby.

"Yes, I know that you've failed and think my brother is going to die. But he's a fighter and won't die. He isn't allowed to die unless I say so. So please quit talking and let me see my brother." Dean growled.

"Dean," Bobby snapped, sure Dean was hurting, hell Bobby was hurting too. But the nurses and doctors were doing everything they could for Sam. It wasn't there fault that it just wasn't enough this time.

They were both led into I.C.U. Then led into Sam's room. And that's when Dean finally broke out into tears. Seeing Sam lay there so pale, so still. It looked like he was already dead. And Dean would've thought that if it weren't for the heart monitor.

"Oh God... Sammy." Dean whispered, sitting himself down on the chair next to Sam's still form and promising himself that he wouldn't leave until his little brother woke up, until his little brother was fine.

2 hours later...

"Do you remember when we were kids, we went out to the Impala and carved our initials. They're still there you know. I didn't get rid of them when I mended the car. They're still there." Dean spoke to Sam, Dr Mildred stated that if you speak to him, even in a coma. Sam could hear him.

"When you wake up we'll go on a vacation, how does that sound? After all the shit we've been through we deserve a little R&R. But in order to do that you've gotta wake up little brother, cause I ain't going without you. I'll never go without you." This kept on going, Dean speaking to an unconscious Sam. It had been going on for a while now, Bobby walking in and out with coffee or some sort of cafeteria food.

But Dean couldn't bring himself to eat, couldn't bring himself to do anything other than sit down next to his brother and talk about absolutely anything that came to mind.

"I know most of the shit I said must've added do whatever else was going on in that freaky head of yours. But I need you to know that I didn't mean any of it. I was upset and pissed and I was taking it out on you. But I need you to wake up now so than I can truly apologise." Dean whispered.

2 weeks later...

It had been two weeks, and Dean was slowly losing his mind. The doctors have already spoken about pulling the plug more than Dean would like to admit. And every time they ran off in fear due to Dean's rage of emotion. He wasn't gonna let Sammy die. He couldn't. Cause Sam wasn't dying. Not when his last words where shoving Sam away, not because of a car accident that had already taken one Winchester. Dean wasn't about to let it take two.

"Come on Sammy. The doctors say that you're not gonna make it. How about you open those eyes of yours and prove them wrong. You're a stubborn pain in the ass Sam. Show them that." Dean begged, still gripping onto Sam's hand as if his life depended on it. Because screw the chick-flick rule. Sammy was practically dying whilst there was nothing Dean could do about it.

"Kid?" Bobby questioned, walking into the room with a grim look on his face.

"What?" Dean wondered at what had made the old mad so upset.

"Dr Mildred came up to me again and mentioned pulling Sam's plug," Bobby commented, fearing Dean's reaction. This was always a hot topic for both of them. But Bobby was losing hope and knew something had to be done, he didn't wanna be selfish and he wanted to put Sam out of his misery.

"Shut up Bobby. We aren't letting them pull Sammy's plug. I won't let them." Dean growled.

"He's in pain Dean! He's in pain and he's dying. Mentally and physically Dean, we're already losing him. I wanna put him out of his misery and Sam would understand, Dean we're being selfish by keeping him here when we know that he's just not getting up from this." Bobby whispered, he had to get Dean to see what he was seeing.

"No! Damn it Bobby no! Sam ain't dying! He's gonna make it and we're gonna be alright! And who gives a damn about being selfish! If this is selfish than I am the most selfish guy on the planet because I am not losing my brother! One more word on the subject and you can leave. Clearly you've lost hope in Sam! I'm not gonna make that mistake!" Dean barked angrily.

"Don't talk to me like that boy. I'm just trying to get you to see the big picture here-" Bobby began.

"I don't care. I ain't losing faith on my brother. I've made that mistake before and look where it's gotten me." Dean whispered. And with that Bobby left.

"Come on Sammy. They're all losing faith." Dean begged.

"Well tell them to get help." A whispered and tired out voice spoke.

"Sammy?" Dean questioned in shock.

"It's Sam." He smirked but his eyes showed his pain.

"It's good to have ya back man." Dean smiled as he pressed the call button. 'God Sammy, I'm so sorry little brother.'

"Good to be back. And awake." Sam whispered before falling back asleep. 'It's alright Dean, I forgive you. Everything's gonna be okay.'

"Get some sleep Sammy." Dean whispered, and after he had a long, long talk with the doctors and Bobby, he would take in his own advice.

Yeah... everything was gonna be okay.