Lost

Chapter 1: Where are we?

Disclaimer: If I owned Futurama, you'd know.

Hermes walked towards the large red Planet Express building. Normally, he'd only bring a small stack of papers with him to the office, but today wasn't normal. The Professor decided to bring the entire Planet Express crew with him on a vacation. And by saying decided, he really meant that the court ordered him to. So there were going to visit some exotic island somewhere out in space.

The building was now in sight, and Hermes could see a few figures standing outside, waiting.

Fry was there with a suitcase, sunglasses, and a Hawaiian shirt instead of his usual red jacket. Leela also had a suitcase, and a cage, apparently for Nibbler. Bender didn't have anything, but that was normal for him. He'd just steal what he needed anyways.

Amy was there with fifteen oversize suitcases. Hermes didn't really want to know why. Zoidberg was missing. Hermes took this as a good sign.

He walked up to the building and unlocked the door. Everyone followed him into the building, grabbing seats at the big round table near the ship. Soon, Professor Farnsworth walked in. He didn't have anything special with him.

"Well," he said, "What are you doing, just sitting there. Hurry up, put your stuff onto the ship before Zoidberg gets here."

Everyone dashed from their seats and ran up to the ship. But it was too late. "Hello friends," Zoidberg said, walking onto the ship. "Today was trash day, so I couldn't find anything in the dumpsters. I have nothing to bring with me."

He looked around to see no one watching him. He just decided to be quiet and listen to Hermes, who had just called for everyone's attention. "All right people, listen up," he said. "We are taking care of some final few things before we leave. First, role call. Fry?"

"Here."

Leela?"

"Here."

"Professor?"

"Eh, oh, whaaa. Honestly, it's not mine."

"Amy?"

"Yeah."

"Bender?"

"You suck."

"And last, and least, Zoidberg?"

Zoidberg made some odd giggling sounds.

"Alright," Hermes continued on, "Now for sleeping arrangements. This counts for the ship and the hotel. Fry and Bender will have their quarters. Leela will share with Amy. The Professor and I will take the cargo hold. Zoidberg, uhhh, I don't even care. Just find someplace."

The Professor gave Leela directions, and she lifted the ship up. She was about to leave the atmosphere when she was forced to move with the rest of the traffic in a different direction. She followed the line impatiently until she saw where she was heading. Everyone aboard the ship heard a loud cry "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

On a giant stage was the greatest hero of all time, Zapp Brannigan, and "faithful" companion Kif. They were ready go out for war. There wasn't a particular reason; it was more of a publicity stunt.

Ships from around the galaxy were coming to see the Nimbus lift off. Zapp notices a familiarly green ship in the line. He grinned and started to head in their direction.

The crew had to get off the ship to allow it to be searched, though why, no one would ever know. Fry and Bender were walking around when they ran into Zapp

"Hey," Zapp said, "I remember you. Weren't you enlisted in the army? What are you doing here?"

"Uhhh, you don't know us," Bender said quickly.

"Yeah, we're, uhhh, new here."

"Wait," Zapp said, acting unusually smart, "You're –"

Zapp wasn't able to continue, for Leela had walked up to him and kicked him in the usual area. Zapp fell to the ground with his hands between his legs. He looked up at Leela.

"What was that for?" he asked.

"Nothing," Leela responded, "It's just been such a long time since I did that last. C'mon guys, we can leave now. And Bender, did you have an illegal crate of booze in your room?"

Bender looked around and said, "Of course not! Why would I ever have booze?"

Leela ignored Bender's obvious lies and led the two back to the ship. She sat down at the controls and saw Zapp running towards the ship. At this sight, she floored the gas and took of, literally, like a rocket.

Zapp sighed as he saw the small green ship take off. Why wouldn't Leela fall for his seductive charm? He knew she just hadn't felt "The Urge", as he called it, yet. He turned around and boarded the Nimbus.

In the control room, Kif was waiting for Zapp. Not really, time without Zapp was better, but the sooner this thing was over with, the better. Zapp had the crew lift off the ship and started to look out the front window.

After about fifteen minutes, Kif finally decided that he should ask for orders.

"Hmmm," Zapp began to think, "We need to make this look like a war, right? Okay, spin the ship in circles and fire randomly into space."

"But sir-" Kif began to protest.

"Kif," Zapp said, "You can either listen to me or go on bathroom duty with me. It's almost time for my weekly shower."

Kif started to feel nauseous, and ran over to the controls. He spun the ship around and fired around thirty torpedos.

Meanwhile, Leela had decided that being 10,000,000 miles away from where she had last seen Zapp was a safe distance, and she began to slow down.

She looked out the window and to her left and saw a small group of orange moons, clustered around a very large green planet. She called the Professor up to the controls.

"These moons aren't even on the map, Professor," she said, "Where are we?"

"Hmmm," the Professor said, "It appears that we are in uncharted space. We better be very careful to get back on track, or we may be lost in space."

Before another word could be spoken, a torpedo, seemingly coming from nowhere, shot towards the ship and into the cargo hold. After the explosion, Leela lost control of the ship.

"The engines," she cried, "I've lost control of the engines!"

The ship began to get pulled in by the gravity from one of the moons. It was close to the size of Earth.

"Brace yourselves!" Leela shouted to everyone on board as she began to see land. She gasped. The orange she'd seen was water. It was a giant orange ocean. They'd crash into the water and drown. And then she saw it, a small island directly below them. She prayed that they'd hit it. By luck, they did.

A few minutes after the crash, Fry crawled out of the wreckage and coughed. "Where are we?" he asked.

"We're lost," the Professor said, "In uncharted space."