So I am continuing on from the last chapter in the previous instalment, I'm not going to bore you guys by saying something at the start of each chapter and because you have all been amazing and patient, I'm going to post this story all in one go!
If you come across any mistakes or I do something stupid like accidentally post the same chapter twice, please let me know so I can fix it.
Also if you think improvements can be made, please tell me your thoughts too! I'm expecting to make adjustments to the story some time in the future, improving things and whatnot, but for now I'm just going to be quiet and let you all read. Enjoy!
The master decided that Fairy Tail was going to enter the Grand Magic Games, in order to put our guild back on the top and claim a thirty million jewel reward. Everyone agreed that it was important that they train hard in order to be in with a shot of winning, however I elected stay home and look after guild whilst everyone was gone as I didn't need to do much training personally.
Though it quickly transpired that I was needed when I got a call through lacrima crystal from Jet and Droy, yelling at me with worry to tell me that Levy and the others had disappeared to the Celestial Spirit World and they'd been gone for three days. "For goodness' sake, can't I take my eyes off you kids for even one moment?!" Just as I spoke I stopped, blinking at myself. Since when did I view the others as kids? Well, I was now seven years older than all of them I suppose.
I journeyed to the beach resort that the guys had gone to for training, carrying nothing with me, not even my katana blades. Because of the heat I changed my outfit slightly, opting for shorts and a halter top underneath my sleeveless jacket with the hood. The moment I got to the beach, however, I was set upon by Jet and Droy. "You've gotta do something Fae! Can you fly to the Spirit World or something? Levy might be in trouble!"
"Calm down you too, there's nothing to worry about. Just tell me exactly what happened." I instructed them calmly, however it soon became clear that calm was the last thing on their mind.
"But Levy's gone missing! We can't go on without her, we only just got her back!" They both yelled up at the sky with tears streaming down their faces as my eyebrow twitched in irritation until finally I gave up and slammed their heads together.
"Just shut it, both of you! They'll be fine so long as they have each other!" I yelled at them before relaxing. "They'll be back I promise. Those guys will always come home no matter how long it takes. Hell, we've already waited seven years for them when everyone else assumed us dead, what's a few more days?"
"Actually sweetheart, you're coming to join us." I gave a loud shriek, throwing my hands up into the air as Loke's scent enveloped me, one arm slipping around my waist as his hand gripped mine.
"Loke!" As a golden light enveloped us both I felt a rushing sensation, his smile making me blush heavily as with a flash, I was standing in an entirely new world which made my jaw drop. I stared at the sparkling sky, little lights floating all around me with the picturesque view of planets floated across my vision. "What…where…where are we?"
"You're in the spirit world!" Lucy's voice said to me brightly and I turned around to see everyone safe and sound…at a party?!
"Wait, you mean to tell me you guys have been here partying all this time? I WAS WORRIED SICK! I GET A CALL FROM JET AND DROY TELLING ME YOU'D ALL BEEN CARRIED OFF TO THE SPIRIT REALM TO COMBAT DISASTER AND YOU'RE ALL HERE CASUALLY DRINKING COCKTAILS?!" I yelled at them all, making them all bow their heads and shrink under my voice as I glowered down on them. "I am extremely disappointed in all of you, especially you Erza. I expected more from you guys. You could have at least dropped a note or a message to tell us where you were, running off into the sunset without warning is incredibly immature." I paced back and forth, continuing my lecture until suddenly I stopped and looked around.
Only then did I see the other spirits all smiling and waving at me cutely, unfazed by my lecture and as I slowly looked up, I came face to face with the celestial Spirit King himself. "Ooh…my apologies." I blushed deeply, bowing apologetically.
"Peace, there is no need to apologise. Come and join our feast! We are celebrating the return of our dear friends, so join my table and make yourself comfortable." He invited so I bowed politely again then walked towards an open seat, still blushing nervously as I looked around, however Levy quickly took my hand.
"Fae, you have to check out the library here, there are so many books!" She gushed and instantly my interest peaked. She and I spent our time combing through the books, speed reading with our wind glasses until we were drunk on words and they started to spin off the page.
"Hey! Come dance with us Fae!" Natsu yelled and grabbed my hand, making me yell in protest before he started to violently swing me around in a dance, his manic laugh making me panic for my own safety as he burped out flames and I was forced to duck until someone came to my rescue.
"If I may, I'd like a turn with the lady." Loke said charmingly, smiling as he took my hand then proceeded to elegantly spin me around into his arms, leading me in a waltz as Lyra's song began to fill the air, the melody and Loke's eyes stealing my breath away as I became completely lost in their depths, numb to the world except the warmth of his fingers. I'd almost forgotten how beautiful they'd become. "I have to say Fae, you've grown into quite the magnificent woman, that body makes my heart jump in my throat."
"Don't say such things Loke…" I blushed, looking away with embarrassment but I couldn't help but feel thrilled at such a compliment. Does this mean he finds me attractive? No stop it Fae, you should outgrow this silly childish crush. Before I could open my mouth to speak again, the music stopped and Loke looked up, giving a grin.
"Well, it's good to see you again Fae!" He said cheerfully before pulling back and let go of my hand, leaving it held out towards him as he turned away and approached Aries, giving her a gentle bow then took her hand to lead her into the next dance as I stared. A heavy pressure began to crush my chest as I watched them closely. His hand rested on the small of her back but pulled her close, tucking her other hand close to his face as he brushed a finger against her cheek, eyes filled with an unbound warmth, unguarded and unreserved just for her as she gazed back at him in a similar fashion. They were so close…so wrapped up in one another…what? What is this?
I touched my cheek to find a stray tear there as a cold knife of ice lodged itself deep in my chest. Was this…my first heartbreak? It was bound to happen. I knew it would. I'd read about it in books and romance stories but nothing could ever have prepared me for this crushing feeling. I feel so weak and feeble, like my knees are going to buckle at any moment and the floodgates will open unless I did something to stop them.
Quickly I looked around, searching for someone, anyone. "Virgo. Take me back." I pleaded with her forcefully, pressing my eyes closed as my shoulders trembled and my fists turned white the tighter I clenched them.
"Is there something wrong?" She asked obliviously but I quickly shook my head, desperate to escape.
"Just take me back! Please, get me out of here!" I tried to keep as quiet as I could in order to keep others from overhearing. "Return me. Now!"
"As you wish." She bowed politely before the rushing light appeared around us both and she carried me back to my own world where finally I felt like I could breathe, sucking in a deep breath. It was night time and the beach was deserted as I fell to my knees, tilting my head upwards towards the sky which seemed painfully void and cold tonight. "You do not seem well, should I fetch someone for you?" Virgo offered but I shook my head once more as I gripped my head in both hands, struggling against the wracking tears which were still threatening to spill.
"No, I'm sorry for getting angry with you, you were amazing. Thank you." I apologised to her. "I'm fine, just please leave me alone." Virgo just gave me a strange look, her density not understanding why I was sobbing on my knees before she answered.
"Okay." Then she disappeared in a puff of smoke, leaving me completely alone. I was soon cold, shivering from the breeze so I picked myself up, taking deep and shaky breaths before I started to head towards the resort. When I looked at the clock I was surprised to find that several hours had passed since I'd left, however when Jet and Droy found me, they told me that it had been over a week since I'd disappeared.
"What happened? Loke just appeared and carried you off!"
"Everyone's okay, they're just celebrating their return with the spirits. It was a surprise feast for Lucy that they were brought to." I murmured darkly, keeping my face hidden from them as I stood. "There's no need for you to worry."
"Oh...okay. If you're sure." Droy said before Jet frowned at me.
"Did something happen? You seem a little off."
"I'm fine, just tired. Astral travel is challenging for someone who isn't used to it." I explained before beginning to walk off. "I'm going to the girls' room. Call if you need something." I left them gaping behind me, unable to face them just yet as I clutched my chest, still feeling the breaking of the pieces within me as I found the room the girls were all sharing before going to the hot spring bath, resting myself in the water in an attempt to comfort myself.
Loke and Aries. I should have guessed when Lucy told me their story all those years ago. Of course they would be close and of course Loke would have special feelings for her. Besides, I should have prepared better for this, I knew that we could never be, considering the fact he was immortal. I'd managed to separate those feelings in those seven years, managing to bury them far down inside me, however when everyone returned, those feelings blossomed open again like a lotus flower.
Shaking my head I decided to cry through it, remembering that the girls in my books all did the same thing; that they more or less all followed a step by step pattern to move through the stages of heartbreak and set themselves on the long road onto healing.
Step one. Cry. I cried a lot, not loudly like some dramatic floozy but quietly, allowing the water to soak up my tears until I felt hollow.
Step two. Eat comfort food. I ordered almost half a tonne of ice cream, selecting all of my personal favourites before working through them tub after tub, making sure to lick the carton clean before starting the next one.
Step three. Sit in silence. The silence was the worst part because in the calm quiet my mind screamed louder, echoing in the caverns of my own mind as I remembered every single interaction Loke and I had together, from the very beginning up until now. It was painful, remembering how close we used to be and just how much he cared.
Step four. Be angry. I threw pillows across the room, shouting in frustration and even kicked over one of the beds trying to release all my pent up rage in as controlled a way as possible, not wanting to have to pay for damages.
Step five. Fix anything broken. I went about the room, righting everything I'd thrown or quietly fixed something I'd accidentally broken like the table leg. The past seven years had taught me to be fairly handy if nothing else, considering the disrepair of our guild at the moment.
Step six. Acceptance. For a long time I've been able to accept that Loke would never be mine, I'll just have to throw myself into these Grand Magic Games as a means of distraction. I hadn't intended to participate beforehand, however I think this would be the perfect opportunity to distract myself from what I was feeling internally. I'd only entered the games that one time before announcing I wouldn't go back as too much attention was a bad idea for my undercover work. With this in mind, I decided to go for a walk.
The air was still pretty chilly so I pulled on a proper coat, borrowing one of Lucy's which she'd left behind then stepped back out onto the beach, walking through the surf before heading towards one of the cliffs where I'd be able to listen to the song of the ocean, its crashing waves sending gentle vibrations up the cliff to my feet.
The horizon was misty and the sky was still clouded, the only light available coming from those of the resort and the lamplights dotted down the path leading up to the cliff. This place reminded me of the cliff where I'd placed my mother's memorial. I'd gone to visit it regularly during the seven year gap of Fairy Tail's downfall, however I always made sure that no matter what job I was doing, I was back for that one day that had had the most important impact on my life. Every year I returned on the anniversary of her death.
I kept no secrets from the guild, they all knew who I was and where I'd come from. This time, however, I was not surprised by their understanding. I knew they all would, I knew they loved me like family and they had told me repeatedly that they didn't care about who I was in the past or who I was forced to be, because it was the person that stood before them they cared about.
A smile touched my lips and I felt a little better, closing my eyes to take a deep breath before slowly I reached up with both hands and unclasped the necklace around my neck. "Thank you Loke, for everything." I whispered as I dropped the chain into one hand, looking at the pair of angel wings and the sign of Leo as they gleamed with a flash along with the rotation of the lighthouse on one of the cliffs further out to sea, its brightness shining upon the metal as I cupped the gift in my hand. "But I'm free now, there's no need for you to watch over me anymore." Cupping my hands to my chest I embraced the necklace one last time, feeling its warmth as it began to glow.
Holding out my hands I watched as the necklace began to break away into golden flecks which were quickly snatched away by the wind, returning to the spirit world into Loke's possession as I made completed the final step. Step Seven. Closure. As the last of the necklace disappeared the golden specks spiralled like fireflies out over the ocean before winking out one by one, disappearing completely and I lowered my hands to my sides, standing as the breeze lifted my hair around me.
"Hm." I hummed a quiet laugh, closing my eyes into the smile as I took a final breath then leaned back into the wind, absorbing the sounds and smells of the ocean as I felt the crushing of my chest slowly begin to ease.