Authoress' Notes: Hi! Its me again, and surprise, surprise I have another Vash x Meryl fic. Short little one-shot set after the series but no real spoilers to speak of. Don't really know if this is fluffy or not? Oh well I'll let you be the judge.
Disclaimer: I own nothing, even if I do want Knives...
Where is your Heart
By: Ashauni
Where are you Vash? Meryl asked herself. Her unusually long raven colored hair flopped into her eyes as she raked her hand though the fine strands. Standing in the doorway she stared at the man she knew she had come to love, his profile silhouetted against the moons of Gunsmoke.
It had been a little over a year since Vash had come back, and yet at times like this she had to wonder if he was really there at all. Sure during the day he put on that mask of his and acted out the normal routine of annoying her and playing with the kids of the town, but at night he was sullen and distant. His eyes, usually so open and honest, truly windows into his soul, had become dull and emotionless.
She wondered again as she often had if it involved his brother. Knives... Vash had not mentioned what had happened on that fateful day, and she had not asked.
"Meryl..." Vash said, questioningly. He didn't turn towards her and she almost thought she had imagined the sound.
"Vash?" she asked as she went to stand by his side. He was sitting in an old rocking chair on the porch of there small rented house. A comforting hand rested on his shoulder, and he covered it with his real hand.
"I'm sorry..." he began.
"For what?" she inquired.
"I know I haven't been...myself lately. Just don't worry about me, ok?"
"What makes you think I was worried." she replied in a small quiet voice that belayed how much she truly was concerned.
"Don't..I thought we had moved past lying to each other." he said, his voice so sorrowful and distant. She suddenly had the overwhelming urge to kiss him and banish every sad thought running through his head, every scar on his heart.
"Where is your heart Vash?" she asked. The question startled herself and him in its abruptness, but she didn't stop it, it was something she had to know.
He thought to himself for a moment, rolling the question around in his head, and then:
"You know, if you had asked me that a year ago I would've said in space. My heart is and always will belong to Rem and where ever she might be is where my hearts desire rests." Meryl actually heard the breaking of her heart, but she showed no signs of the heartache. She had resigned herself to her fate when she asked the question, never thinking that he would say it was here with her, only wanting to know the answer.
"And part of that is still true. Rem is still and always will be a huge part of me. But...how can I say this? I came back for a reason. I have a home here." he said , giving her hand a reaffirming squeeze. "You and Millie are my home now."
"Vash, about Kni..."
"Don't, please?" he interrupted. "Just know he is where he can do no harm."
"But its troubling you, isn't it?" she asked.
"Yes." he admitted reluctantly. "He is still my brother..."
His aqua blue eyes turned towards her for the first time during their conversation. Those shining orbs full of emotion once more, the windows into his kind and gentle soul.
"Thank you Meryl," he said, his voice choked with emotion. " you have saved me in so many ways, I don't know if you'll ever know how much you mean to me."
"Uh..." the short insurance girl blushed, not really knowing how to respond. Then a thought crossed her mind, one she had been thinking for a while and the conversation tonight seemed to make it a distinct possibility.
"Vash...are you going to leave again?" she asked hesitantly.
"You know me too well don't you?" he asked with a little sad grin on his face.
"Are you coming back?" she asked, dreading the answer he could give.
"You know they say home is where the heart is after all. So I guess I'll have to come back." He smiled a true smile at her for the first time since he came back.
Meryl's heart nearly burst with joy. She knew now he would always be back, no matter where he went or what he did, she had complete faith that he would be back. He answered her question and now she knew that his heart was here, maybe not with her , but here nonetheless.
He turned his gaze back to the stars and she knew that whatever was bothering him, he would fix and then he would come back to her. So she let her gaze follow his, and decided to enjoy the moment.
They stayed like that for a long time, hand in hand , staring up at the moons of Gunsmoke.