Everything Series 1/4

Title: Filters in Neon

Rating: M, just to be safe

Characters: Reese (character study), Crews/Reese

Summary: Reese wants everything, Crews wants nothing.

Disclaimer: I in no way own the characters of Charlie Crews, Dani Reese, or any other affiliated with Life. I only borrow them for my selfish acts and intend no harm. Also, the lyrics belong to Buckcherry's fantastic song, "Everything."

A/N: This story came to me first as a fanvid idea (still planning on doing one) but then morphed into a full fledge fic in the planning. It's my first foray into the Life fandom and so I need some critique. But please, smart critique only.

-- Buried way beneath the sheets I think she's having a melt down
-- Finding it hard to fall to sleep she won't let anyone help her
-- The look on her face, a waste of time
-- She won't let go, gonna roll the dice
-- Losing her grace, starts to cry

Dani shielded her eyes against the flashing neon glaring at her through the curtains. Her head was pounding with every beat of its pulse and she suddenly had the urge to run to restroom... Where ever that was and however disgusting it was.

Not only did her head feel like a piece of wood that had been cleaved, but her mouth felt like carpet and her body had that numb feeling she associated with alcohol, drugs and nameless sex. She could feel his body next to hers, feel the empty warmth that emanated from his form but lacked the strength to move out of the bed and away from it.

She hated coming down from the high of sex and the buzz that way too many drinks gave her. It made her feel dirty, cheap, old, and all the things she knew she was. But she didn't care, never had; only wanted the dull ache of living to cease, even if it was for a few hours.

She didn't want to be alone and she could never deal with it sober. Not since then...

The springs of the bed lifted as her one-night stranger sat up slowly with a grunt and she could feel him look over his shoulder at her. Unconsciously, she feigned sleep and moved deeper into the thin motel sheets. Evidently, he bought it or didn't care, because he started round the room looking for his clothes. He even disappeared into the restroom.

As she listened to him take a piss, the sound echoing loudly in her skull, Dani noticed white residue against the black of the night stand. 'Oh, fuck…'

She felt her heart start to pound in her chest, and the blood rushed in her ears, making her even more nauseas and cling to her stomach. Was the blow his? Had he done it? Had she?

'Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god…'

She felt the bile rise in her throat as he came around to the night stand where the white crystals were left and put a fifty down; he whispered, "Thanks for the night." She was sure he thought she was asleep still and shuddered as he left the room, letting the neon flood the room and causing her to wince back the pain.

Suddenly, she propelled herself across the ruffled sheets that smelled of sex, booze, and mistakes towards the bathroom. Throwing herself against the white porcelain, she finally let go and let the pain exit her body with vomit and tears.

She sat there for what seemed like hours, breathing in the scent of sickness and stale urine and making her feel like she were on a tilt-a-world. Opening her eyes, she decided that she was going to go into shock if she didn't move and put some clothes on… It was too cold on the tile floor with no clothes, and she was crashing.

She dragged herself towards the bed, gathering what clothes she came across, which consisted of her panties, socks, and shirt. Putting them on slowly, she looked around for her pants and spotted them near that damn night stand with the evidence of her down fall. After rummaging around in her pockets, eyes shut tight against the pain in her head, she found her cell phone and flipped it open.

Not even looking, Dani hit the first number in her speed-dial.

-- I feel her pain when I look in her.

"Uh, hello?"

"Crews, this is Reese." She knew from the sound of his voice, he was probably in bed and half-asleep around the girl of the night. Dani remembered how that thought use to put a smile on her face; even the Zen master himself had vices.

"What's wrong?"

And she did grin, even if was empty, at his suddenly alert voice, "Nothing, I just need you to come and get me." She heard the question begin on his lips and started again. "Crews, just shut-up for once and come and get me."

"Where are you?"

Dani knew exactly where she was; no other motel in L.A. had this wallpaper. She had used it as a place to get high once upon a time.

'Well, at least it had been once upon a time,' she thought as she ignored the evidence on the night stand.

After he had the address and had hung up, she leaned against the headboard. She didn't care that she was half-clothed and sitting next to cocaine residue, let Crews think what he wanted to; everyone else did and had.

Dani sat there and watched the neon filter through the curtains.

-- I wanna be, I want everything
-- I want everything