Disclaimer- I do not own the Boondocks or any show on G4 or anywhere else and if you honestly thought I did, leave now.

"G4 blows my nads"

"It's not that bad; "X-Play" is pretty good"

"Shit, "X-Play" doesn't make up for all the birdshit everywhere else"

Huey watched Riley and Jazmine argue over the sound of Kevin Pereira and Olivia Munn discussing the newest Youtube "Epic Fail" (which today was called "Whale Homosexuals" or something like that).

"All they show now is "Cops 2.0" for ten fucking hours a day"

"I think you're exaggerating a bit"

"No shit, Sherlock"

"Would you guys shut up!" shouted Huey, "I'd rather listen to a speech by Ron Paul than listen to another minute of your inapplicable disagreement". Huey grabbed today's newspaper and got up to leave.

"Wait, where are you going?" asked Jazmine.

"Out"

"Can I come with?" she asked hopefully, her green eyes shimmering brightly.

"No"

When Huey got outside, he saw an old black man named Uncle Ruckus outside causing a Ruckus (that was supposed to be joke). In fact, he was spouting out some very peculiar phrases.

"BUTT FUCK!!!"

"What!?" asked Huey, "what did you say?"

"You heard me Ronald McGoddamn Donald"

"Uhhhh, yeah. By the way, Grandad told me that you got kicked out of a "Lens Crafters" the other day. What happened?"

"I walked in to pick up my fucking glasses… And I couldn't stop calling people Dicks!!!"

"So they kicked you out?"

"Yeah, and then the manager called me a Dumb Ass, like he's my dad and shit"

"You seem a little more "crude" today than usual, Ruckus"

"SHUT UP!!!! You can go to "Jolly Pirate Donuts" and take a 2 hour shit for all I care!" Ruckus exclaimed, "I'm gonna take a piss and when I come back I'm going to talk about "The Mighty Ducks" movies"

Huey decided it was time to go. When he got to the end of Timid Deer Lane he saw Tom DuBois and his Grandad arguing. "Great" he thought, "another irrelevant argument".

"I don't care what you say!" said Tom, " "Saved by the Bell" was and is one of the best shows of all time"

"Shut yo' effing mouth!" shouted Grandad, "I thought you was supposed to be black. You'd do good to study your heritage"

"Do well" Tom corrected.

Huey didn't feel like seeing another black man get beat so he kept on walking. He decided that he might as well head up to the hill where he always goes to read the newspaper. When he reached the top of the hill, he leaned his back against his favorite tree and started reading the headlines:

"If strike isn't settled quickly it may last a while"

"War dims hope for peace"

"Smokers are productive, but death cuts efficiency"

"Cold wave linked to temperatures"

"Child's death ruins couple's holiday"

"Blind woman gets new kidney from dad she hasn't seen in years"

"Man is fatally slain"

"Something went wrong in jet crash, experts say"

"Death causes loneliness, feeling of isolation"

But while Huey was reading, unbeknownst to him, another young boy was sneaking up on him. "Hi Huey!"

Startled, Huey jumped up from his sitting position, "Who the hell are you?"

"It's me, Caesar"

"Who?"

"Your best friend! We make commentary about current issues almost everyday!"

"Wait, are we talking about the show or the comic strip?"

"The strip!"

"Oh. Well that ended in 2006, so you might want to just leave, no offense"

When Huey got back home, he found that Jazmine and Riley had apparently left the living room, so he decided to watch some T.V. When he turned it on he found that NickatNight was already on and it was in the middle of an episode of "Home Improvement":

"Mr. Miller let's me rent snowmobiles for free" Tim said

"Wow! I'm sooooo lucky to be married to a man with you're kind of connections" his wife said sarcastically.

"You better shut the fuck up before you get raped, then murdered… I'm not joking"

"Tim, I think we should get a divorce"

"Why?"

"Oh my gosh!!!" exclaimed Huey, "I can't believe how young Tim Allen looked back then"

I hope not too many people are offended so far.