Everytime by Britney Spears
Notice me, take my hand.
Why are we strangers when
Our love is strong?
Why carry on without me?
Rogue watched him out the window. She hid behind the sheer curtain so that he would not see her. She sighed. She did want him to see her. Pressing her palm against the window, she let her tears fall. She stroked his tiny figure feeling the pain wash through her body. God, how she loved that man. She loved him with all her heart and soul. Things were going so well, but they tapered off. She stopped caring about 2 months ago. She couldn't stand being around him; he made her angry. There was no real reason. None at all. Now he was with someone else. He wasn't with her.
Everytime I try to fly, I fall.
Without my wings, I feel so small.
I guess I need you baby.
And everytime I see you in my dreams,
I see your face, it's haunting me.
I guess I need you, baby.
She turned away from the window. She felt her stomach heave. Laying on her bed, the waves of guilt, sorrow, and regret washed over her. She closed her eyes, but saw only him. Even in her dreams, he was there; haunting her like a ghost. They were dreams of them together. Most intimate, that left her hollow because she knew they were not real. The dreams would never be real again.
I make believe that you are here.
It's the only way I see clear.
What have I done?
You seem to move on easy.
Rogue cringed at the thought of what she had done to him. How could she? Oh dear, God! She silently screamed in a fit of tears. She placed a hand on the side of the bed where he slept. She shouldn't have made a big deal out of it. She imagined him telling her it was OK, but she knew she was was dead wrong. Her friends told her that he was supposedly seen with another girl. Funny, the new one was like her. She laughed. Why move on with someone he already hated?
Everytime I try to fly, I fall.
Without my wings, I feel so small.
I guess I need you baby.
And everytime I see you in my dreams,
I see your face, it's haunting me.
I guess I need you, baby.
She got up, going to the window again. She saw him outside the gates. So it was true. She saw her. Someone she never thought that it would be. Tears fell harder, the nausea almost making her collapse. All the torment of the last few days came flooding back. The angry words. The shouting. She had hit him. She was so angry. So angry. She didn't care. No she had cared, but pretended not to. She needed him so bad. She thought she saw him glance toward her window. He then kissed the woman. No! No, it can't be! This can't be happening! Come back! Don't leave me!
I may have made it rain.
Please forgive me.
My weakness caused you pain.
And this song's my sorry.
It started raining just like the night it happened. Stupid rain knew before she did. She had to get his forgiveness. God knows she had tried already. She sent him flowers, even write him a song to apologize. He refused to talk to her. She couldn't blame him for not wanting to see her again. She didn't want to see herself, let alone BE herself. She felt she was too good for him. Everytime he was around she was embarrassed by him. Last time they were together she seriously looked at him and couldn't believe she was with a man like this. There was no reason for this kind of thinking. Nothing had triggered this. Nothing at all. It was her own stupidity. Nothing else.
At night I pray
That soon your face will fade away.
Every night she dreaded going to sleep. He would not leave her alone. Awake, asleep; he was there. She sobbed herself to sleep since it happened. She felt so alone. No one was there anymore to hear her fears, sorrows, joys. She spent the first few night vomiting over it. She couldn't believe she had done that. Worse of all is that she was cheating on him in her sleep, in her thoughts. She considered actually doing it so many times. There was someone else her that she cared for very much also. She made the mistake one time telling him about her cheating thoughts. He had thrown a vase of flowers at the wall and called her all sorts of names. He ended up pushing her against the wall in anger. He yelled at her for what seemed like forever, then he left. The vase had cut her forehead. She touched the wound now. This was all her fault in the first place. All her fault.
Everytime I try to fly, I fall.
Without my wings, I feel so small.
I guess I need you baby.
And everytime I see you in my dreams,
I see your face, it's haunting me.
I guess I need you, baby.
She couldn't take it anymore. This was pure torture and she did it to herself. She smashed out the window in her room. This was it. No more of this crap. She needed him so bad and she had ruined it all. She was nothing. She was the smaller person in this. She looked out at him. She saw him and the woman staring up at her window. She was heartbroken over this. She lifted herself up onto the ledge of the window. Looking down the four stories, she laughed. She didn't even know if she had the will to fly anymore. She needed him. The school lights lit up the yard illuminating where he stood watching. She sobbed as she stared into the black sky. She spread her arms up into the sky. She saw his face. His face was always there. She closed her eyes as she spread her 'wings' and let herself fall.....