I looked at Neal and Henry out on the fire escape and how perfect they looked together. There was no doubt they were father and son. I began to feel cramping and figured it was from chasing Neal and I was seriously out of shape until I realized it was probably just my period coming.
I was cut from my reverie by my phone.
"Swan." I answered shortly.
"Ms. Swan, this is Dr. Whale. I have some rather surprising news for you. Can you possibly come in today?"
"Whale, I'm in New York, can you just tell me now?"
"Ms. Swan… as you know we did a blood test to make sure everything was normal at your last appointment. We found high levels of human chorionic gonadotropin or hcg."
"What does that mean?" I asked beginning to feel nervous.
"It means… Ms. Swan you're pregnant. I would love for you to come in as soon as you get back to confirm…" Whale continued on about how until I'm back I should abstain from alcohol or drugs but I really didn't hear anything. My thoughts flew from being pregnant and how terrifying that is then to how I'm cramping and bleeding. Both not being good signs.
"I'm on my way back now; I'll be there in a few hours." I said cutting him off. Neal and Henry both looked at me in protest.
"MOM! We can't go home now!" Henry protested.
"Emma, I just met him you can't take him from me already." Neal said trying to talk me out of it but my mind was made.
"I don't expect you to understand but I have to go back now." I said desperately grabbing my jacket and wrapping my scarf around my neck.
"Is it Cora? Or Regina?" Gold asked speaking up and I saw Henry tense at the name of his adoptive mother..
"No, it's nothing to do with them." I reassured.
"Can I stay here? With my dad?" Henry asked and Neal looked just as shocked as I felt.
"Henry I don't think-"
"I can take him. We can get to know each other better." Neal suggested and Henry beamed at him.
"I don't have time to argue with you, I know you won't take no so fine. But if he gets hurt at all, I will end you." I glared at Neal before turning to Henry. "Please be safe. Something bad is happening and I couldn't stand it if I lost you too."
"Mom I'll be fine but what's wrong? Who did you lose?"
"We'll talk about it when I know more. I really need to go now though. I love you so much." I said kneeling down and hugging him. I turned back to Neal. "Gold has a spare room key to get Henrys clothes. Make sure he eats well and goes to bed at a decent hour. You're his father not his friend." They followed me down to the exit of the building where I hugged and kissed Henry one last time, not wanting to let him go. I stood up straight as they headed back up the stairs. I turned towards the door as someone whisked past me gently pushing me to the side. I looked to see Killian headed for Gold, hook raised to attack.
"Killian stop!" I cried to him. Neal looked back but was pushed against the wall as Hook continued to storm up the stairs, only slightly faltering at my call.
"I've planned this for far too long love, to give it up." He gritted, Gold pushed to the wall and hook ready to attack.
"Killian I'm pregnant." I blurted out. He froze in his place, shocked. Neal and Henry looked equally surprised. "There's something wrong, it hurts so much. I have to get to Whale. Please just forget this and come with me. I need you to take me to Storybrooke." He took one more frozen moment before turning his complete attention back to Gold. In that moment I felt my heart break as he chose his revenge over the life we could have had. It wasn't just him choosing Milah over me but also history repeating itself, Neal left me when I was pregnant, even if he didn't know, and needed him most. "Goodbye." I whispered before once again turning back to the door preparing to go by myself just as I always had, when I felt a wave of weakness pass over me; all of the stress of this trip, and exhaustion finally catching up to me. I felt myself fall but before darkness overtook me completely I heard three different voices calling my name.
I felt myself regain consciousness but I don't have the energy to open my eyes. I feel myself rocking as if on a hammock. I smell leather and rum but I also smell hints of salt in the air. I gingerly open my eyes and recognize Killian's cabin. I'm on the Jolly Roger but how did I get here? I wrap the warm blanket around my shoulders before I make my way towards the door and begin to walk to the deck when I hear angry voices.
"Why couldn't we just bring her to one of the hospitals in New York?" Killian asked.
"Her magic is unpredictable. She is the product of true love. The most powerful thing to exist. She is still not in control of it and bad things would happen if sparks flew out of her as a doctor is examining her." Gold rebutted. I saw Gold and Hook chest to chest looking as if they were going to murder each other at any moment. Neal was coiling ropes showing Henry how its done. I took a few more tentative steps up the stairs before Henry noticed me.
"MOM!" he came bounding towards me drawing everyone else's attention. "Are you feeling better?"
"I'm much better especially with you here. Henry, I'm sorry I lied to you about your father. I should have told you the truth. I know better than anyone what it's like not knowing. I promise never to lie to you again."
"Dad and I were talking and I understand why you did it. You didn't want to get hurt again and you didn't want me to get hurt either."
"Henry I love you so much."
"I love you too mom. Is it true? Am I getting a baby brother or sister?"
"I don't know. I didn't want to tell you anything until I was sure everything was all right. Dr. Whale ran a blood test and he's pretty sure I am but it could be something else. If I am, that wasn't how I wanted you to find out. "
"Well it would be exciting to be a big brother."
"So it could be something else? You might not be-" Neal started coming up to me.
"I am or at least I was. I'm positive of that, I just don't know if I still am. I didn't want to get Henrys hopes up for something that isn't there."
"Em, was it planned? Do you want another baby?"
"It was definitely not planned, I didn't think I would ever have anymore kids but then Whale called and told me and now I want it. Though it might be for the best if I'm not… I'm not that great a mother to the one I have. I know nothing about being a parent, Henrys already pretty much grown up he doesn't rely on me for everything. Plus Hook and I aren't exactly together, you saw him choose his revenge when I needed him, I would probably be in this by myself again."
"Hey, hey slow down, you're an amazing mother. You're so protective of him and you understand and listen to him. And you won't be by yourself, you have your parents and Henry and you have me. Maybe this could be our second chance. We can do this together, get a house, raise our family… just like we planned only a little delayed."
"Neal you left me. You abandoned me just like everyone else. There is no 'we' I don't want a second chance with you. Yes we'll have to see each other and be civil but only for Henry. I'm not interested in anything more than that." I couldn't take him trying to convince me to give him another go so I walked to the side of the ship, staring out at the water.
I pulled my blanket closer to me as I felt the wind whipping me. I felt his presence before I noticed him. He tried wrapping his leather jacket around me but I shrugged it off. I heard him sigh but he took the thick material back anyways. "Thank you for bringing us back to Storybrooke." I said standing straight not letting him see how much he hurt me.
"Love, I wasn't going to leave you there… I- "
"I'm not your love, Hook. I think you made that rather clear. And its fine, it's not like we were together, we were together for one purpose and now I'm dealing with that consequence."
"Love, I understand you're angry but I was terrified for you. I'm here, you're not alone in this. "
"Hook-"
"Killian, please don't call me Hook. We are more than that. I feel for you things I haven't felt in centuries and I know you feel the same."
"Hook, you may feel something but it will never be enough. I can't live in her shadow always being second best knowing that if she were alive, you would be with her. You will always choose her and your revenge over me and I deserve better than that. I could tell in New York, this" I pointed to my abdomen, "is not what you want. It's fine, I'm giving you an out."
"I don't want an out! Emma when you told me you were with child, with my child, I panicked. I've haven't thought about becoming a father since Milah died. Then when Bae left I figured I was never meant to have a child. I certainly didn't expect you to tell me as I'm trying to skin my crocodile! You are not second best, I am with you because I want to be, not just for the more pleasurable times but I want to always be there. Yes I love Milah and she will always have a spot in my heart but you are consuming my entire being. I have fallen for you Swan and I want to be there with you while our child grows. When you said you were hurting and something was wrong, I felt all the air leave my lungs, when you fell… I've never been more terrified in my life. It hurt to see you hurting and I will forever hate myself for making you believe you are anything but first. Emma I want this." He slowly brought his hand towards my belly, looking at me waiting for me to stop him but I just stared, eyes darting between his and his hand. He pushed between the two ends of the blanket and pushed his hand up beneath the hem of my shirt. The feel of his warm calloused hand on my smooth skin made me realize just how much I needed him. I truly wanted him to be a part of this every step of the way.
"Killian." I whispered walking closer to him reveling in the feel of his skin on mine, just like all of those nights we would be together. "I'm scared something's wrong. I didn't realize I wanted to have a baby until Whale told me."
"Everything will be fine, I'm sure he will be just like his mother, stubbornly strong."
"It could be a girl. Then you'll get to deal with all of her possible suitors." I teased him.
"Emma, she's not even born yet and shes already stressing me out! Let's lock her in a tower. Only males that can go near her are Henry and Charming."
"We get to tell my parents you knocked their innocent daughter up."
"Can we hide your mums bow? She's scary with that thing! And you are far from innocent my dear you just love to tie me up!"
"Ms. Swan, see this bean shape?" At our nods of acknowledgment he continued. "That is your perfectly healthy baby, congratulations." I beamed looking at Killian who squeezed my hand lightly and gave me an earth shattering smile.
"Our bean" Killian whispered into my ear, kissing the side of my head. I smiled up at his reference. It was only too perfect.
"Why was I cramping and bleeding?" I asked as I realized what had made me panic so much.
"Both are perfectly normal, they could both be from the period you should have received had you not been pregnant. Sometimes not all hormone levels are high enough to stop it. It explains the bleeding and the cramping. The cramping could also be caused by your uterus stretching, it's preparing for the baby. They are normal however you did the right thing by coming in, it could have been a miscarriage." This time, I squeezed Killian's hand, thankful for the good news. "I will leave you two to get dressed and then we'll talk about your pregnancy long-term." I stared at the picture on the ultrasound machine of the small little bean before turning to look at Killian. His eyes were glued to the screen.
"Killian," He turned his attention away from the screen and towards me. "I love you."
"I love you too, lass."