The Uncertainty of Love…

By kira

"Gure-san?"

Ayame slid the door to his best friend and cousin's study open and slipped inside. He was so uncharacteristically quiet when he came over and sat down across the table from where Shigure sat, typing away on his computer, that it was several minutes before the author of several hentai novels even noticed he was there, before pretending otherwise.

Ayame coughed softly in an attempt to make his presence known. "Gure-san?" he said softly. "Gure-san, are you busy?"

"Hunh?" Shigure continued to type as he wanted to get this particular scene down while it was fresh in his head. Besides, while the soft-spoken voice sounded vaguely like Ayame's, the fact that it was so lacking in joi de vive gave him pause. If Ayame the eternally cheerful was depressed, then Shigure figured he had better get a few more pages in before his editor kills him, herself, or both. So he typed on while his visitor patiently waited, which made him feel even more afraid.

"Gure-san, if you're busy I can come back…"

Sighing softly, Shigure hit save and then clicked the on/off switch on his monitor. "Aya-chan?"

Ayame mirrored his cousin's sigh. "Gure-san, I'm… umm…" Ayame shook his head.

"Is there something wrong, Aya?" Shigure was now starting to get really worried and was doing his best not to show it.

"Yeah…"Ayame looked away and then back at his fellow zodiac member.

"Are you going to tell me or do I have to guess?" the dog teased.

"I'm afraid, Gure-san."

"Afraid? What happened?"

Ayame the snake sighed. "You remember Kuramae-san? She works for me."

"Yeah… She's the girl about Yuki's height with the glasses, right?"

"Yes! That's her!"

"What about her? Did she quit on you already? It's been what? Two weeks? That's got to be a new record for your employees."

"No, she's still there, Gure-san." He laughed. "She likes working for me and, I really like having her there."

"So what's the problem with her?" Shigure smiled, pleased and relieved that whatever melodrama had been brewing had passed. He reached over and picked up his cigarette and took a long drag on it. He sat back, watching the play of emotions that flitted across Ayame's face, before he slowly exhaled.

"Tori-san…" Ayame said sadly.

"Tori-san? What's he got to do with it?" Shit! Don't tell me the girl's got a crush on Hatori and Ayame wants my help in some little plot to bring them together? It'd be just like him to do so…

"I…ummm… I think I'm falling in love with her. You know like Tori-san and Kana and, I'm afraid, Gure-san…"

What?! Shigure stared at his friend opened mouthed, the cigarette dangling from his hand. For once he had nothing to say.

"Don't look at me like that. I'm serious, Gure-san. I'm afraid. Afraid, because I've seen what love did to Tori-san. It ripped it his heart out and shredded it into little pieces! While he's never been one for words, Gure-san, he grows more and more silent with each passing day! And I'm afraid I'm going to end up just like him! Or worse…" Ayame felt his eyes sting with unshed tears. Damn it for once in your life stop being so dramatic, Aya, or Gure-san will think you're just making it up and playing the drama queen again.

"Wow…" Shigure was stunned. He had no idea what to say, and he wished he could help Ayame as easily as he helped his characters in and out of similar situations. He looked around his study as the silence grew between them, trying to figure out how to make fiction into real life when Ayame's voice cut through his thoughts.

"Yeah… and what makes it worse is she's not a Sohma like us, or like Kana, so she doesn't even have an inkling of what's supposed to remain unsaid. What am I going to do? I'm afraid and I don't like it one bit, Gure-san! This is one time I can't bluff my way out of it, one time I can't make a scene to deflect attention away from things and onto me, one time I can't do as I please… I'm sorry, Gure-san, I bet I sound just like one of those silly girls in your novels, hunh?" He half smiled sadly. "But I just can't shake this feeling of being afraid and I don't know what to do. Forgive me, I probably shouldn't be burdening you with this-" The snake stood up to go.

"It's okay, Aya-chan!" Shigure snuffed out the remains of his cigarette and reached out to take Ayame's hand. "You don't have to worry about coming to me with your problems. You're my best friend and one third of the Mabudachi trio! We swore always to be there for each other, remember?! Okay, so now it's your turn to be taken care of." His other hand reached for the phone. "Do you want me to call Tori-san? Maybe we can go out somewhere?"

"No…and thanks, Gure-san." He smiled. "I'm feeling a little better now. I'm still terrified but I think I'll be okay."

Shigure chuckled and shook his head before he stood up and walked around his desk. He held out his hands and pulled Ayame to his feet. "Silly." He held him close.

"Thank you…" Ayame whispered breathlessly.

"I'll always be here for you and I'll do whatever I can to help you feel brave…" He pulled back and cupped his cousin's chin, gently titling his face upwards.

"Yeah…You always know what I need, Gure-san."

"Yup…" He kissed him gently.

Ayame broke the kiss. "Ummm… I think I know what'll make me forget about being scared," he said suggestively.

Shigure laughed. "I'm supposed to be the hentai here, remember?"

"I know, but maybe I can ummm…practice being brave with you and then I won't feel so afraid tomorrow at the shop."

"As long as you're quiet and don't upset Yuki and Kyo-kun." Shigure wagged his finger in Ayame's face.

"I promise."

"Then what are you waiting for…"

Smiling, Ayame looked away and back as he shrugged. "Hmmmm…I don't know…you?"

"Moron! Anyway, I'm tired of sitting here. Let's go have some fun."

"Hai!" Ayame grabbed Shigure's hand and led him towards the door. Sliding it open, he pulled his cousin along as they crept silently towards the stairs and the sanctuary of Shigure's room. They were nearly there when Yuki came around the corner with Kyo in tow, the beginnings of another argument brewing between them, when Ayame breezed by, spewing his usual nonsense about what he and Shigure were supposedly going to get up to. Shigure followed sedately behind and shrugged as he tried not to laugh at the look on the two younger boy's faces as they made their escape. Can't you two fools see he's only playing with you? All he wants is to be loved and adored, the same as we all do…

Shigure stood in the threshold of his room and watched Ayame walked toward the window and looked out. Shigure thought he looked so sad, standing there, that he wished him a silent "happily ever after," before entering his room. He hoped things would work out and if they didn't, he figured he could do what he always did and simply write that happy ending for him…